And we finally get a kiss... :D Please enjoy muchly (and sorry for the delay)
A few days later…
Brennan looked in the mirror, ashamed of what she could see. Her fingers traced the pale tissue that ran, worm-like across her back, pressing down in it until it hurt. She felt her phone buzz in her pocket and picked it up.
'Brennan.' Her voice was flat, dead. She'd opened herself up to Booth and then he'd vanished off the face of the earth, not even having the decency to call her to see if she was all right. She was angry.
'Bones… I…' Her temper flared and she felt her skin flushing. With a conscious effort, she kept her voice steady.
'Booth. What would you like?'
'I'm so sorry I haven't called I was away with Parker… we were… actually never mind.'
'I'm sorry for being pathetic that night.' She suddenly blurted out.
'Brennan… you weren't pathetic, in fact, that night, you were the strongest person I know. And actually, thank you. I know how hard it is.'
'No, you don't.' Booth ran a finger over his tattoos and shivered a little.
'I do actually. Look, can I come over…?' Brennan looked in the mirror again and sighed softly, a single tear welling up in each eye.
'Okay.' She folded her phone down. There was a knock on her door, and she hurriedly pulled her shirt down, tugging at it to make sure it was even. 'Booth.'
'Bones I'm so sorry I didn't get back to you before. But I want to talk to you…' She shut the door as he stepped inside and sat at her table, crossing her arms over her chest tightly.
'So talk to me.' She stared at him until he nodded slowly.
'I was a suicidal teen. You know that, Cam knows it, Sweets knows it; and because Sweets knows… Gordon Gordon knows.' Booth took out his cuff-links and folded back his sleeves, showing Brennan the black markings on the inside of his wrists.
'They're tattoos, I see. I've seen them before.'
'No, Bones… put your fingers… here.' With some difficulty, he placed her fingers on the right spot, just on the top of a small raised bump and took in a deep breath. 'I was a suicidal teen. To the point where I tried to commit the act… on two separate occasions.' He transferred her fingers to the other wrist, where a tiny ridge was, and she drew in a breath sharply.
'Booth… I don't know what to say…'
'You don't have to say anything.' He told her, rolling his sleeves down and doing up his cuff-links again, hiding the tattoos and the scars they concealed from view.
'I do… my God I've been so damn selfish.' She shook her head as though it were enveloped in a fog that was reluctant to clear. Almost absent mindedly, her fingers went to the scars on her back, tracing the jagged lines. His hand closed over her wrist.
'Don't do this to yourself.' He whispered, stroking her hand a little.
'Do what?' She touched the ridge again, as if trying to smooth the scars away.
'That… let me see…' She looked deep into his eyes, and saw no deceit, so slowly raised the hem of her shirt and let him see the full horror of the pale scar tissue. He ran his fingers along it, his warmth slowly warming her back and making her shiver slightly.
'Booth I'm so sorry.' She whispered, tears sparkling in her eyes. 'I'm so sorry you had to be like that, I'm so sorry you were alone.'
'I wasn't alone Bones… I had Jared.'
'No, you protected Jared from your father, you took all the beating for him… Booth… you're such a good person and you never deserved that. I'm sorry.' Booth waved a hand airily. 'No… I mean it Booth.' She bit her lip. 'I'm not good at this.'
'No, you aren't.' She stared at him for a moment and shook her head sadly.
'I wish I knew what to say.'
'You…' Booth suddenly became aware that he was in somewhere he really didn't want to be. 'I… Bones… I think you're a good person.'
'Good people… they don't let people like you get hurt.'
'You didn't know me then Bones.' She bit her lip again.
'I wish I had. I could have stopped this.' Booth shook his head.
'No one could have prevented this Bones. You don't have to worry.' She looked at him with tears sparkling in her eyes and nodded.
'You're my partner, I can't help but worry.' She mimicked him from a few days ago. He laughed. 'Where did you go?'
'To get my confidence.' She nodded. The rain pounded on the windows, and Booth stood up suddenly, knocking over a pot on the table. There was a picture of the man that had abused her under that pot. 'What is this?' His voice had gone deathly cold.
'I needed a reminder.'
'Jesus Bones! I thought the scars would have been enough!'
'They are! They're a constant reminder!'
'So why do you have this?' Booth held up the photo.
'I wanted to remember his face. I never want to forget him. The same way I'll never forget what he did to me. But some days… some days I wake up and I can't remember his face Booth. I can remember his name, where he lived and everything else. But not his face. And it drives me crazy.' She sighed softly. 'I need a walk.'
'In the rain? Are you nuts?'
'Please Booth, I need to do this.' She took one last forlorn glance at him and walked out. 'Stay as long as you like.' She nodded, as if confirming to herself it was the right thing to do, and left. Booth stared after her for a moment, then jumped to his feet and sprinted after her.
oOo
He had no hope of catching her. She was running before she was even out of her apartment, her feet pounding the carpeted corridors until she reached the outside. And even then she didn't slow down, she kept running through the downpour, disregarding the odd looks she was getting from everyone else in various restaurants and shops. The rain had soaked her to the skin in seconds, but it cooled her down, allowing her to run even further.
After a few minutes however, her legs were screaming in protest and so was her side. The stitch seared across, causing her eyes to inadvertently well up because of the shocks if pain in time with her heartbeat. She paused for breath beneath the awning of a grocery store, shivering now that she was no longer moving. She turned around and walked briskly away from the shop again, her wet hair stuck to the nape of her neck. A hand brushed her shoulder and she jumped, turning around and letting out a deep breath as she realized who it was.
'My God Booth!' The rain was pounding on their heads, making them both shiver at the coolness of it as it struck the unprotected skin of their hands and faces.
'I'm sorry I snapped at you. So… so sorry.' She smiled.
'It's okay Booth.' He hugged her, getting completely soaked through as the torrential downpour continued.
'No, it's not. It's unacceptable.' She smiled a little, fingers frozen solid with the icy rain. They stepped back.
'Booth…' They were so close now, heedless of the rain that was battering their skin and almost causing bruises. He placed a finger over her lips and she smiled. 'It's raining.'
'Captain obvious.' He smirked.
'Shut up Booth.' Booth pulled her into him and she suddenly felt his lips on hers, his arms around her neck. For a split second she thought about pushing him away, but then she remembered the scars, and finally finding someone who would love her with them, and decided not to. She kissed him back harder, placing her hand on his cheek as he wrapped an arm around her waist. The rain chilled them but they didn't feel it, too wrapped up in the moment.
'Bones…' His hands were on her scars, stroking them and gently committing the feel of the raised skin to memory.
'I know… I know…' She pressed her face into his shoulder, oblivious to the rain that kept on falling around them.
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