Chapter 3

Becker had left with Marks still seething over their disagreement regarding Toby. She sat alone in the hospital room trying to reach back in her memory in order to pull all the pieces together. Victor Clooney had been looking for Toby and he was on the camera from Ray's office, but how much did they really know about him? Logan's past was still shrouded in half recalled images. Shadow facts that were missing from even the most basic investigation, and yet that initial search had caused Ethan Darnell to infiltrate the department to spy on her and Toby. Not long after that Frank Cardea had appeared then Clooney. It all had to be connected somehow. ++ Find the connection and you find your answers. ++ She thought to herself.

"No." Toby had entered her room without her noticing as she had been too deep in trying to analyze the information. The one word brooked no argument with his eyes wide both in determination and almost realized fears. Puzzled at first, Charlie soon realized he must have picked up on her mental reasoning.

"You can't order me off a case. Especially not this one. He tried to kidnap you, and shot me. I intend to find out what was behind it all." What had started out as helping Toby learn about his past had now become personal to her.

"Charlie it was because of me that all this happened. You have to stay away from it." I can't protect you and I don't want anything to happen to you – the thoughts were kept to himself, but the emotion showed in his eyes.

She took a deep breath. "Toby, I know you feel responsible, but I'm a big girl and I can make my own decisions. " Her tone was slightly mocking, but not harshly so. "Besides I'm going to be on the sidelines for a while anyway." She gestured to her bandages, and her tone softened when she saw the near panic in his eyes. Charlie took a good close look at Toby. "You look like you haven't slept in days."

"Something like that." A half grin played across his features as he leaned back in the chair next to her bed.

"So catch me up. What's been going on since I landed here?" She eyed him quizzically.

There was no way around it… to tell her about what he had been doing would draw her further into the whole mess. He sighed and looked at her with an expression between pleading for her not to ask and sorrow for promising her he would never hold anything back. "My mother's alive… was alive … is still…. I don't know. I got a hit of her in an accident … Clooney was involved somehow. Went to look for her, but all I found was her abandoned car off the side of a bridge with nothing to follow up on. She was gone. Frank is in custody for shooting Clooney and he is still having memory problems." Toby looked deflated after the quick summary as if the information had been holding him up and now that it was all laid out there was nothing left. "I don't have any way of finding her."

She absorbed the break down and nodded. "How do you know it was her car?"

"I saw her driving it… the wreck – " images of the hit played through his mind again.

"But what if it was a rental or a friend's car? Just because she was driving doesn't automatically mean it was her car." She clarified the question.

It was so obvious a question, but in all that had happened Toby never stopped his headlong rush to consider it. The car had been recovered by the local authorities, and when there had been nothing inside to lead him to Maya, Toby started searching for another way to find her. "Charlie you're a genius." He placed an impromptu kiss on her forehead startling them both. Chagrined at his sudden display of affection he quickly made an excuse to dash out. "I'm going to check with the authorities in Auburn to see who the car was registered to." He was definitely flustered, and it showed in his movements and voice as he shuffled out into the hallway.

Toby headed down to the nurse's station to see if Olivia was still on duty before he left the hospital.

"No she took off early about an hour ago." The brunette behind the desk responded.

"OK thanks Gretchen …" he smiled and grabbed his phone as he walked to the exit. He dialed information then was quickly connected to the police station in Auburn.

Olivia sat alone in her living room with the lights dimmed. She had to get hold of herself, and she couldn't do it at the hospital with all the demands of the ER surrounding her. The cup of tea in her hands had grown cold as the doctor mentally went through the last several hours. Sleep had been on the scarce side for her as well since the start of the roller coaster ride that had begun with the news of Toby's mother being alive and the revealing of his gift.

Since learning that he could read her thoughts her mind had been trying to recall everything she had ever hidden from him. All the times that he was mysterious and distracted that were connected to his secret flooded her memory. Olivia had tried to tell herself that knowing his secret would be a good thing… that now there would be no more frustrated lack of answers to her questions. However always feeling on guard about what you were thinking was turning out to be adding unexpected stress to their relationship rather than benefiting it. Her head hurt with trying to sort it all out, and the soft knock at the door was not a welcome sound.

Toby had taken the bus over to her place. This afforded him the opportunity to talk to the Auburn police on the ride over. The car had not been registered to Maya, but the company name the car was registered to was another unknown to add to the growing list of mysterious clues that didn't seem to fit anywhere yet. His mental notes version of a To do List was quickly overflowing, but first he needed to check in on Olivia as he said he would.

"Liv?" He called through the door as he knocked a second time. Not wanting to reach out to listen to her unless it couldn't be avoided, he tried to wait patiently for her to answer. Finally the door swung open, and he turned to see her standing there stiffly.

"I'm all right Toby… I just want to be alone." Her lip quivered a little and she couldn't meet his eyes.

"You don't look all right." Toby was not one to let those he cared about push him away when he thought they needed him.

Sighing she stepped aside to let him in. There was no use in trying to get him to leave till he was assured that she would be OK. They both walked over to the couch and sat down in silence. "Don't ." She spoke first without meeting his steady gaze.

"Don't what?" he tried to take in the non verbal cues to assess how badly shook up she was.

"Don't get inside my head." The annoyed tone showed that she had assumed he was actively listening to her thoughts.

"I'm not. Liv… talk to me. It's not like you to let anything get you this rattled." Toby pleaded.

Finally raising her head to look into his concerned and puzzled eyes she tried to explain. "I'm usually more alert to my surroundings than that… that guy came out of the blue. There was no warning…"

"You've dealt with people in hostile states in the ER before… but something about this is different..." Her reluctance to talk to him was becoming frustrating, but he resisted the urge to find out for himself by opening his barriers. He knew Olivia was already uncomfortable about his gift and he didn't want to make it an issue between them.

++ I'm losing myself to you! ++ The thought pounded through with such anger, but it only confused him more. He reached out to put his hand over hers but realized a moment too late that was a mistake. The touch had been instinctive to comfort her, but it also turned up the volume on her mental images to the point that Toby could not shut them out. ++ I can't even have any privacy in my own head! Can't live like this. Always second guessing my thoughts. ++ Toby snatched his hand back quickly to break the connection. He turned away trying to compose his expression so as to not let on what he had seen.

"Toby?" She didn't understand why he pulled back but then she jumped to the right conclusion. "You looked into my head didn't you?" Anger flared in her voice.

"Olivia I didn't try to … it just broke through." He insisted

"Get out! Get out of here now. " This was the last straw that broke her tenuous hold on her nerves. "I can't take this anymore Toby. I need you to leave me alone."

"You don't mean that … Liv, you're upset " Trying to calm the situation, he kept his voice level and low.

"Yes your damn right I'm upset." She stopped yelling and took a deep breath. Lowering her voice she spoke with tight control, "Look I simply need some time alone. I know you mean well, but please leave."

"I'll go … but give me a call OK. I'm worried about you." The sentiment was genuine, and his soft tone deescalated the tension.

"Later… please just go." She was nearly in tears. His sad eyes met hers as he nodded then let himself out the door.

Alone in the room she slumped down on the couch and cried till her head started throbbing again.

The next morning Oz slowly made his way to the lockers dreading another day of Doug. To his astonishment and delight, there stood Toby in his EMS uniform.

"Toby! You're back? Tell me you're back, man… " The bubbling excitement almost caused Toby to laugh.

"Yeah I'm back… can't stay on leave forever and things are starting to stabilize a bit now with Charlie being discharged and me finally catching some solid sleep." He slapped Oz's back and headed for the truck.

They climbed in and Oz almost jumped into the seat for joy. "Hey man how is Olivia doing? She seemed pretty shaken up and I've not seen her in today."

"She's… dealing. Think Liv just needs some time to regroup. Probably called in today is all. " The episode at her apartment the night before skittered through his mind, but he shrugged it off as being temporary. Olivia always bounced back. "Checked on her last night and she wanted some time alone." Toby glossed over the worst parts of the encounter hoping Oz wouldn't persist.

"Uh – huh … then why are you soo distracted? Any news on your mom?" Oz was well aware of the toll the non productive search for Maya had taken on his partner.

"Not exactly…" The hesitant reply was drawn out as Toby thought over the possibilities that Ethan's reappearance may have to offer.

"Meaning?" Oz pressed the issue.

"Meaning Ethan is in town. " Toby had mentioned before the discovery of the other telepath who might be his brother that was taken as a baby, but had left out many of the more disturbing details.

"Ethan? As in long lost brother and fellow mind reading dude? That Ethan?" the news almost caused Oz to swerve out of his lane.

"That would be the one. Hey you need me to take the wheel?" Toby half teased.

"Very funny… you lay a bomb like that on me and then joke about it. What does he want? Does he know about Maya? " Oz snickered then questioned.

"Not sure exactly what he knows. He's not the sharing type. He knows more than he's saying that is for sure, but why and what he is hiding is yet to be seen. I believed him when he told me he doesn't know where Maya is now. Think that is why he came here … to see if I knew. " Toby puzzled out loud.

"Where is he now?"

"Somewhere close … he's supposed to contact me again."

"Let me get this straight… Ethan shows up, has a nice little chat with you and you don't even follow the guy to find out where he is staying. " Oz shook his head.

"Didn't seem the prudent thing to do. Did I mention he had a gun?" the words dripped with sarcasm from Toby's smug expression.

"Oh… well that's diff- a gun?" Oz was starting to consider taking Toby up on his offer to drive if his partner didn't stop tossing out these heart stoppers. Trying to reign in his surprise he dropped his voice back to a forced conversational tone. " So when is he supposed to contact you again? "

"Don't know – " Toby was cut off by a call coming in for an elderly male who had fallen down a flight of stairs.

"Hold that thought … time to get moving. " Oz flipped on the lights and rushed to the call.

"Thanks guys… I've got it from here." Detective Marks waved to the two fellow detectives who had driven her home from the hospital and double checked to make sure she didn't need anything before leaving. She closed the door and turned to look at the empty apartment. "Great… now what am I going to do to keep from going out of my mind with boredom."

After twenty minutes of flipping through channels on the television and glancing over her dusty bookshelf she eased her way into the sofa. Her mind simply wouldn't leave the Clooney case alone even though she had been warned to rest and stay away from anything police work or Toby Logan related during her recovery and this obsession hit on both counts. Better to beg forgiveness than ask permission she decided as she picked up the phone.

"Hey Elliot… you got a minute?" She called the evidence department and was pretty sure she could count on her friend to keep her request quiet. "While I'm stuck here on sick leave I wanted to go through the Clooney case notes and evidence."

"Clooney? The guy who shot you … I thought that case – " the clerk started to preamble a denial, but Marks cut him off.

"I'm calling in a favor. You owe me, and I need those files without Becker approving it." There was a hesitation on the other end of the line, but then he came back with a plan to get her the info without raising suspicion.

"You're the best… and next time the drinks are on me." Charlie hung up satisfied that she now would have the chance to research in peace and get the answers she needed.