Title: Fragmented Memories
Author: Traxits
Fandom: Final Fantasy VIII
Rating: Teen.
Content Notes: None.
Chapter Word Count: 4695 words.
Summary: Ellone moves back to Winhill, and she's surprised to see that Seifer is living there as well. Perhaps even more shocking is the fact that he offers to help her remodel her parents' home in exchange for a place to stay.

[[ … Chapter 3: The Successor … ]]

Ellone learned one thing on the drive to Deling: her little green car had never been intended to hold someone Raijin's size. He spent most of the ride stretched out in the backseat because every time he attempted to sit up, he only managed to hit the top of his head on the roof of the car. Fujin frowned each time he did it and pushed him back to lay down.

They checked into the hotel in Deling under Ellone's name, and the hotel clerk hesitated when Ellone spelled her surname.

"Loire?"

"That's right." She shifted her weight, her brow furrowing. "Is there a problem?"

The woman shook her head. "No, no problem."

And then they were swept up into their room. Fujin and Ellone had decided that sharing a single room with two beds was the best idea, even though Ellone cringed at the thought of such close contact. Raijin had deposited what bags they carried. Ellone, used to running, had packed even lighter than the SeeDs. Fujin had been pleased.

Fujin and Raijin split up, presumably to locate where the trial would be held, and within moments of their arrival, Ellone was sitting alone in the hotel room. She rubbed a hand over her arm.

She wasn't used to being alone. The trip from Esthar to Winhill had been the longest time she'd ever spent on her own, and since Fujin and Raijin and Seifer had moved in, she hadn't had more than a few minutes at a time to herself. And when she slept. She glanced around, her eyes lingering on the phone, and for a moment, she entertained the idea that she could call someone.

That she knew of someone she could call.

But really, who would be there? Squall and Quistis and Zell were all in Balamb Garden— or on a mission somewhere— and Selphie was back in Trabia. She couldn't call anyone in Esthar, and she was pretty sure that Edea was still keeping a low profile. After all, it had been her face everyone had seen.

So Ellone called no one, just paced in the room, uncertain of what she could do. She shivered again, sat on the edge of the bed, and just as she was considering connecting, seeing what she could find out that way, there was a knock on the door. Raijin came in before she could say anything, and she raised her eyebrows at the tall figure just behind him.

"Irvine." She smiled warmly and stood, and he crossed the room to her, taking his hat off as he did. He smiled back, and she was pleased to see that he, like Seifer, had no trouble recalling her. He didn't struggle with fuzzy memories and a half-forgotten past.

"Sis." He hugged her close, and she was careful not to touch his skin. He wore enough fabric that it was easy, and when he finally let her go, he held her at arms' length, as though she were a child to be inspected. "You look well," he announced.

She laughed, waving a hand. "I am well. ... Sort of."

Raijin nodded vigorously. "Seifer's gonna stand trial," he explained as Irvine frowned at both of them. "He... He's different, ya know?"

"Since Ultimecia," Ellone added.

Irvine nodded slowly, and from the shadows on his face, she was pretty sure that he understood. "We're all different, Sis," he said, and then he glanced back at her. "So, Raijin flagged me down to meet you so that I could help?"

Ellone blushed and twisted one end— the end she hadn't ripped— of her scarf. "Can you?"

Irvine stood there for a long minute, then finally sighed. "I think I can," he said lowly, and then he walked over to the phone and began dialing. Ellone fidgeted as she waited, until she finally sat down, laying her hands flat on the blanket. Raijin walked over and he rested a heavy hand on her shoulder. Comforting her, she realized after a heartbeat. She smiled up at him, drew a breath, and then Irvine was speaking.

"Garden. Yeah. ... Irvine Kinneas." He tapped a foot. "Yeah. No, I need to request SeeDs from Balamb and Trabia Gardens. ... Yes. Squall Leonhart, Quistis Trepe, and Zell Dincht. Selphie Tilmitt." He glanced back and held up a finger to Ellone and Raijin. "Right. Thank you." He hung up the phone, and quietly, he asked her, "Have you told Laguna yet?"

She shook her head slowly. "No way to contact him," she murmured, and she wondered at his position if he were able to simply request SeeDs like that. He must have guessed her question because he held up a hand.

"Don't ask me, Sis," he said softly, and he crossed the room to look at her. After just a minute, he pressed a quick, chaste kiss to the top of her head—

There was a casket lowering into the ground and someone was holding her hand. She looked up at the tall blond man and the breath fled her lungs—

She smiled up at Irvine, doing her best not to express that anything at all was different. She didn't want him to know that she had seen a moment of his past, had shared the heart-rending emptiness that came with watching a casket disappear beneath the dirt. She must have done well because Irvine didn't seem to notice that anything was different.

"Get some rest," he told her quietly, and then she reached out and caught the edge of his sleeve just as he walked in front of her, heading toward the door. He stopped short.

Raijin's hand was suddenly even heavier on her shoulder, and Ellone drew a deep breath before she looked up at Irvine. "I want to see him," she whispered.

"Seifer?" He licked his bottom lip, and he turned to look at her. He was searching for something, trying to see exactly what Seifer was to her. Ellone wasn't sure how to hide that, wasn't sure if she could. Seifer had changed her, repaired something that she had considered as irreparably damaged as the wall of her home in Winhill. Now that house stood tall and firm, history erased from it. She was doing her best to mimic it.

Ellone straightened her back and lifted her chin. "Yes," she said firmly. "I want to see him."

"I don't know if I can manage that, but let me find out." Irvine hesitated just another minute, and he added, "I'll do everything I can for you."

The words twisted in her chest. They were a remnant of an affection that even she could scarcely remember. Irvine felt that he owed her because he thought that he should, not because she had ever done anything to actually earn it. He was assisting her out of some misunderstood gratitude. Her throat tightened at the thought, and for the first time that she could remember, she lied.

"Thank you," she whispered, and her hand slid from his sleeve. She had lied with those words because instead of correcting him, instead of assuring him that they were even, that he was his own person not some shadow of a memory, she had taken advantage of him. She swallowed, trying to dislodge the lump that had begun to choke her.

The court room was exceedingly uncomfortable. Ellone sat with Fujin and Raijin on either side of her, and occasionally, Raijin would nudge her and offer her a supportive smile that she couldn't quite make herself return. Seifer was near the front of the room, and the new President of Galbadia sat across from him. Seifer was leaned back in his chair, appearing as calm as he could. Strangely, he was still not handcuffed, although two soldiers in bright red uniforms stood on either side of him.

She couldn't figure out why they hadn't cuffed him. Squall, Rinoa, and Zell sat in the row just before Ellone. Selphie and Quistis were on their way, although they had needed to be called back from missions. Irvine was sitting in the front row, looking even more uncomfortable than everyone else, his hat on his knee. An older gentleman was sitting beside him, and periodically, Irvine would bend his head close to the man, then smile as he leaned back. Ellone's eyes narrowed.

She wasn't used to being in the back like this, to being someone not of the utmost importance. No one in the room knew who she was aside from her friends. She chafed a little at the anonymity, even though she had spent most of her life embracing it. Sighing, she leaned forward a little, struggling to see Seifer better. He wasn't looking at the crowd his trial had drawn though, wasn't looking for her. He probably thought she was still in Winhill, pining away.

Her teeth clenched at the thought. She resisted the urge to connect everyone in the room just long enough to insure that they would pass out. They couldn't stop her from storming up to Seifer then, couldn't stop her from hitting him. One good smack across the jaw. She could see it. It would make her feel better.

Well, maybe. She was the first to admit that she wasn't entirely used to the emotions roiling through her, crashing against her, waves from an ocean she'd not known existed. A hand touched her arm, crushing her scarf between them, and she looked over at Fujin.

"Strong," she murmured and inclined her head toward the front of the room, where the President had just finished giving his speech, calling the courtroom to order. Ellone swallowed, nodded her compliance, and sat, on the edge of her seat for the reading of the charges.

She found herself drifting during the reading— "burning of several small towns, unauthorized use of military personnel..."— and she spent the entire time willing Seifer to look at her. It wasn't until she heard her name that she looked back at the president.

"During an unauthorized search for one Ellone—"

She hesitated, and Fujin's hand tightened on her arm, kept her from standing, from saying, 'Yes. He located me and I'm safe and can I take him home now?' That would get her held in contempt of court, she was certain. She shivered, and the president continued reading off several items.

Finally, he looked up, raised an eyebrow at Seifer, and asked, "What do you have to say for yourself?"

Seifer stood very slowly, and he considered the question for a moment. Ellone's heart lifted as she spotted the bright green of her scarf piece tucked into his sleeve, wrapped around his wrist. "I was under orders, sir," he replied. "I was given command of the Galbadian Army, and I authorized everything that you just read off."

The silence in the courtroom was deafening for exactly the space of two heartbeats, then pandemonium broke out. Several people leaped to their feet, shouting, and the SeeDs in the front leaped to their feet in order to keep the mob from stampeding. The president ordered Seifer removed from the court room, and the two soldiers rushed him out one of the back doors. Ellone hesitated, then she, too, stood, and just as the President started to escape the chaos, she announced as loudly as she could, "I'm Ellone."

Several people stopped shouting, looked up at her, and she stood up on the chair she'd been sitting on, ignoring Fujin's insistent tugging on her skirt. She was shaking, and her stomach was churning, but there was no going back. The President hesitated, met her eyes, and she said it again, her voice far steadier than it rightfully should have been. "I'm Ellone."

Irvine was the one who darted back to her, grabbed her arm, and took her up to the President. He hissed quickly in her ear, "Not the best way to do that," but she didn't care. She couldn't think of any other way to get the man's attention, and he had to know the entire story. It wasn't fair of him to judge Seifer based on only half of the facts, and Ellone was completely sick of injustices in her world.

They were led back into a private chamber, and the president sighed loudly as he reached up to rub his forehead. For just a moment, Ellone realized that it would be easy to feel sorry for him. He had been put in a bad position, forced to reassure the people that the injustices of the war would not be forgotten, that those who had so viciously attacked President Deling would be punished. Only, he couldn't punish them, especially since Ultimecia was dead and Edea had claimed safe haven in Balamb Garden. That left Seifer, the only other figurehead that he could actually locate.

Ellone could have pitied him, and quite easily at that, but she refused to. She didn't want to pity him, didn't want to think of him as anything other than the enemy. That had been what the SeeDs had taught her while she was aboard the ship. One couldn't consider the enemy to be human, couldn't let oneself really care for them, particularly not during war. And until Ellone was settled, until she felt safe again, she was at war.

She held her hands in front of her, clasped tightly, and she hoped that the president wouldn't notice her white knuckles. "President—" she faltered, realizing that she didn't know his name.

"President Roshfall," Irvine said smoothly, stepping in front of her. "You have our apologies for that."

"Mr. Kinneas," the president began slowly, sighing and waving his hand slightly. "I really have enough on my plate without this. What exactly are you trying to pull here?"

Irvine glanced back at Ellone, a sharp reminder to keep quiet. "This is Ellone," he replied, and Ellone frowned back at him. She had said that. Had announced it, in fact, to everyone in the courtroom. "She is the one the army was after."

The president stared at her. Ellone remained perfectly still, used to being inspected so closely. She was the Successor in Esthar, an unofficial title that held the greatest honor, no matter the stigma attached to Sorceresses. She, alone, according to the propaganda, had been chosen to receive Adel's powers. She could tolerate the Galbadian president staring a little too openly.

"Why you?"

Ellone smiled. She couldn't help it. She'd been asking herself that question ever since she'd been old enough to understand what was happening to her. "Because I'm the girl that Adel invaded Galbadia for," she finally decided on, and the president's eyes widened.

"From Winhill?" He stood, his hands on the top of his desk. "You're the girl that Esthar took before the country was destroyed?"

Ellone bit her tongue, didn't let herself correct him. A quick glance toward Irvine assured her that she wasn't the only one who wanted to laugh at the thought of Esthar being destroyed. "Yes, Pre—"

"Mr. President," Irvine muttered.

"Mr. President," Ellone corrected, willing herself to be patient. She wasn't familiar with Galbadia as a whole, and certainly not with their governmental structure. She'd never spent a whole lot of time in Galbadia.

"How did you escape— No. That's not the question here." The president sighed and looked at her, his eyes sharp as they raked over her. "What angle are you playing that you wanted to disrupt my courtroom?"

Ellone swallowed, looked at Irvine, but he simply held out a hand, a sign she should speak for herself. She drew a breath. "Seifer was being controlled," she said firmly. "By the Sorceress."

"Edea?"

A wince, and then Ellone shook her head. "No. Edea was being controlled by another Sorceress. Ultimecia."

The president gave her a weary look. The man seemed about ready to crash as he lowered himself back into his chair. "Ultimecia?"

"Yes, sir." From the future, she wanted to add, but the story was outlandish enough. There was no need to tack anything else on. "She was killed by a SeeD."

Irvine nodded, correlating her story. "Squall Leonhart, from Balamb Garden. Ultimecia is dead."

"So... neither Edea nor Seifer were at fault for their actions then? That's what you want me to go out there and say?" The president rubbed his forehead. He probably had a headache. Ellone did.

"Yes, sir. It isn't fair to punish them for something that they weren't in control of." Ellone's voice was steady, and once more, she was quite proud of herself. She could do this whole politicking thing if she put herself to it. "They were at the mercy of Ultimecia, same as the crowd in Deling during the Sorceress's Parade." She didn't need to remind him of that incident. Several camcorders had recorded the whole thing: the crowd's cheering as Edea slaughtered Deling before them. It wasn't the brightest spot in Galbadia's history.

The president looked at her sharply, then he shook his head. "Miss Ellone," he began, and Ellone's stomach sank. He wasn't going to agree with her. "I do not have a choice in this matter. He committed some terrible crimes; someone has to brought to justice for them."

Ellone started to speak, started to step forward, but Irvine's hand caught her elbow. She felt her world shifting at the contact, but she forced her vision to straighten back out, to keep firmly in the present. She watched him bow slightly. "Yes, sir. We understand. We would just like for you to keep that in mind during this trial." Irvine's hand was tight, almost too tight against her arm, and Ellone took it as a sign that she shouldn't speak again. He was in his element here, strangely comfortable given that he was speaking to the Galbadian president.

She could prove it to them, she realized in a flash, a moment of brilliance so bright that it almost hurt her head. She could connect—

But the pain in her elbow from Irvine's hand was too sharp. She couldn't focus like that, not with him making their excuses and dragging her out of the room behind him. They stopped in a narrow hallway, just between the president's chamber and the courtroom. He looked back at her.

"Really? What were you thinking?"

"No one was doing anything and—"

"You asked for my help, Sis. I got Squall and Quistis and Selphie and Zell here. We're going to help you and Seifer both."

She swallowed. "Irvine..." She bit her lip when he looked at her, a combination of being simply worn out and hopeful all at once. "Irvine, you're hurting my arm." She smiled slightly as he dropped it. Another moment. "And thank you. It just... It was a little upsetting to see him like that," she whispered.

Irvine didn't hesitate as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders, pulled her close. "Don't. Hyne knows Zell or Selphie would've done the same thing. Or Squall, had it been Rinoa up there." He smiled, and she giggled just faintly.

"Had Rinoa been where?" Squall's voice cut through sharply, and Irvine sprang back from Ellone, suddenly wearing a guilty expression. Ellone giggled again. Nerves always made her a little giddy.

"On trial," she replied, and she looked up at Squall, really looking at him for the first time since he'd chased her so fervently all the way up to the space station. He, like Seifer, had been so far gone with his duty, with his role in the play they were acting out that he hadn't even realized who she was beyond a simple thing. Something that could save Rinoa.

She had no doubt that Squall would have done the same thing. He was her brother, after all.

He didn't crush her in a hug though, and it would have surprised her if he had. Instead, he simply looked her over, assuring himself that she was okay, that she was healthy, and then he nodded once. "Sis," he said with perhaps a touch of reverence in the word. He sounded exactly like he had as a small boy in that moment.

He wanted to ask her what she was doing there. She could see it, could feel it in the way he stared at her. Given his intense rivalry with Seifer, she wouldn't have been the least bit startled to know that he could smell Seifer on her skin. The thought gave her pause. Did she smell like Seifer?

But then Squall was speaking, asking her how she'd been doing, what she'd been doing, and she let him guide her back into the court room. The SeeDs flanked her as they all left, and for once, she felt at home, felt at ease. She walked perfectly in time with them, having long since perfected the art. She was used to such an entourage.

In the end, it was Squall who managed to get her into D-District Prison. She didn't like being there. Metal had always had a curious effect on her senses, not ... intruding exactly, but being far from comfortable. It was a large part of why she never lingered in Balamb Garden, despite how close it let her be to everyone. At least she wasn't forced to walk down through the prison, wasn't exposed to all those dreams and memories that were thick enough she thought they might be tangible.

She despised prisons.

Squall flexed some sort of SeeD muscle to get his way, and within only moments of Irvine driving with her out to the prison, she was standing near the edge of a massive hold, looking curiously down over the side of it. When she heard the machinery jerking and squealing, she quickly waved Irvine and Squall away. They stared at her, sighed, and then Squall said, "If he hurts you—"

She didn't let him finish. She simply placed a hand in the middle of each of their backs. "I will be fine," she assured them. Suddenly, she wished that Fujin and Raijin were with her instead of Squall and Irvine. She wondered at that thought.

Then the prison cell was being locked into place, and she hurried over to it, clasping her hands in front of herself. The door opened, and Seifer looked up from his seat on the edge of the small bunk. Of all things, what caught her attention was the way he held the edge of the bunk so tightly that his knuckles were white. She swallowed.

"Seifer," she murmured, and they stayed exactly like that, her standing in the doorway, dust that refused to return to the desert blowing around her, and him sitting there, the light glinting off of the metal necklace and his blond hair. He was the one who moved, the one who crossed the distance, glanced behind her as he checked for guards, and then lightly touched the top of her arm.

She was pretty sure that his touch was just a little cold, given what they'd shared. She lunged forward, wrapping her arms around him, pressing her cheek against his chest. He froze, then melted and pulled her close. She smiled at the feel of his hand stroking through her hair.

"Ellie." That was all he said, all she'd needed to hear. With him holding her like that, she could pretend that nothing had changed, nothing was different. She could convince herself that he was going to go home with her.

She looked up at him slowly, sighed, and murmured, "Fuu and Raijin wish you the best. Squall didn't think it was a good idea for them to speak to you, given the circumstances."

"Leonhart would think that," Seifer replied after just a minute, and then he drew her over to sit on the edge of some chairs pushed near the panels that operated the crane. "Did he bring you here?"

"I would have come anyway," she said quickly, but she realized when he smiled that he wasn't annoyed, wasn't being pushy or territorial. That, above everything else, surprised her. "What is that look for?"

He shook his head slightly, but when she didn't move, he explained with, "He's your brother. You're just as hard-headed as he is."

"As you are, you mean," she replied, but she reached out to touch his hand. Her fingers traced over the small scars there, relearning them, familiarizing herself with him again. "What are you doing here, Seifer?" She asked him the question hesitantly, not entirely certain that she wanted to know.

He looked at her for a long moment, and then he clasped his hands around hers. "I need to be here," he replied. "I... I did things, Ellone—"

"I know what you did." Ellone didn't want to hear him say it, not out loud like that, not with that defeated look on his face. The fallout after Ultimecia had not been kind to him, had not been the liberating joy that Ellone had discovered. His anchor, like her own, had been cut, but without it, he didn't know what to do. She was aware of this in the vaguest sense, the idea that they both had changed so much and not at all in same instant.

"I can still feel her," he confessed, and Ellone felt herself shiver in spite of the Galbadian heat. "She's... in my head. Squall killed her, but hell, she hasn't been born yet." He rubbed his forehead just a little. His other hand stayed firm around hers. She stared at it, and then she reached out to touch his temples, her eyes closing.

He pushed her away before she could do anything, before she could sense anything that might have helped. There was a worrying line beginning to form around his mouth, a grayness that hadn't been there. "Don't," he ordered lowly. "I don't want her in you."

Ellone snorted. Unladylike. That was what Seifer had done to her. "She is in me all the time," she replied with a sigh. "I spent my whole life—"

"Safe." Seifer looked back up at her then, and he didn't seem capable of stopping himself before he touched her hand again. "You were safe. That's the important thing."

Ellone sighed just a little, but she intertwined her fingers with his without really stopping to think about it. "Seifer... I want to help you." She looked up at him, bit her bottom lip, and then she shook her head. "No. I need to help you."

He managed a little smile back at her, and he rolled his shoulders. "I can't stop you, Ellie. I don't want to stop you. But I need this." He looked past her, toward the metal walls that surrounded them, and he pointed toward a strange device on the wall. "I tortured Squall there," he murmured, and she shushed him. She didn't want to hear what Ultimecia had made him do.

She had lived it, to some extent, when she had finally realized that she was inadvertently connecting Squall to Laguna. She had spent days, connecting herself to Squall, figuring out what exactly was going on. The torture had been one memory that she'd been trying to shake ever since.

"I know," she whispered, and she kissed him then. He must have tasted the tears as they slid down her cheeks and touched both of their lips, but he didn't say anything. He simply held her close, kissing her as though he wasn't certain that he'd ever see her again. She wasn't entirely sure that he would.

"I wouldn't have turned myself in," he finally murmured, "if I'd known that you were coming back to Winhill. I wouldn't have put you through this."

"I know," Ellone replied. Her hands touched either side of his face, and she smiled warmly at him. "I'm not angry." And she wasn't, not really. She had been, especially in the courtroom, but sitting there with him like that, with him looking at her like that, she couldn't be. "You're going to be okay, Seifer," she whispered. "We both will."

"So much faith."

She didn't have a choice. Faith was a way of life, the only way she'd ever survived.