Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter... but I'm borrowing him from Draco... J.K. Rowling owns them both...
Note: Hello, I am DrarryTLA and this is my story.
...CHAPTER 4...
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Need You To Need Me
"Harry," Ron said softly. His best friend turned sad eyes on him. "The carriages are getting ready to leave," Ron said. Harry nodded and let Ron help him stand. It had been a very exhausting day. He woke up and immediately suffered from the morning sickness and all through the graduation ceremony he could feel eyes on him. He knew Draco had been watching him and it took all of his will-power to ignore the looks. He had wanted so depserately to turn around and with his eyes apologize, he had wanted so badly to run to Draco and kiss him and say sorry. But he knew he could not. So through the ceremony he held tightly to Hermione's hand for support.
The two friends headed down to Gryffindor common room for the last time and met Hermione. Then the trio went down to the entrance hall to wish the teachers they had been with for seven years goodbye. Professor McGonagall started to tear up and promised that she would be checking in on the trio occasionally. And finally it was time to board the threstral-drawn carriages for the last time and head to Hogsmeade. Ron and Hermione kept a watchful eye out for Draco, ready at any moment to distract Harry. Their friend had suffered enough last night and through the ceremony. But it appeared that Draco had already found a carriage. They led Harry to the last carriage and climbed in.
The whole short ride to Hogsmeade was silent. Harry stared blankly out the window while Hermione and Ron just watched Harry. When they arrived at the station they quickly escorted Harry to an empty compartment.
Hermione sat down feeling uneasy. The whole morning had seemed too easy. Draco had made no move to try and talk with her friend. She felt slightly angered at the blonde. If he loved Harry as much as she knew he did, why had he not come?
It appeared that she had thought too soon. Just then someone knocked on the compartment door. She stood and opened the door a crack. "What?" she asked.
"Can I see Harry?" Draco asked. Behind Hermione Harry flinched and Ron wrapped him in a hug. In front of Hermione she could tell that the blonde had been crying though he hid it well. The pink-rimmed eyes did not suit the strong Slytherin.
"I'm sorry, Malfoy," she said going back to a last-name basis. She hadn't called him by his last name since he and Harry had gotten together. The name felt awkward on her tongue. "Harry made it quite clear to me that he no longer desires to see you anymore. I must abide by his wishes," she finished as she tried to close the door. Draco quickly grabbed the door before it fully shut.
"I know Harry doesn't want to see me," Draco said and Hermione could hear him straining to keep his voice calm and collected. "I simply wish to tell him that though he no longer loves me, I would die to keep him safe. I'm going to find Narcissa. That I promise you," Draco said and the whole compartment knew he was talking to Harry. "I will keep you safe no matter what." Then he let the door go and disappeared down the corridor.
Hermione could not doubt the statement to be true as she closed the door. It had sounded as if Draco would stop at nothing to fulfill his promise. And Hermione would do all in her power to help Draco in his quest. The sooner Narcissa and Bellatrix were found, the sooner Harry could be happy with Draco again. "Did you hear that, Harry?" she asked softly. Harry only nodded, a single tear falling down his tan cheeks. Ron held him tighter and looked up at Hermione. The expression in his baby blue eyes stated that he was feeling the same way Hermione was.
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"Knight to E4," Ron laughed as he sat playing Wizard's chess with Harry. His white knight moved to the appropriate space and destroyed Harry's black queen.
"Ron!" Harry groaned. "Can't you let me keep my queen at least one time?"
"Of course not!" Ron laughed. "Your go, mate."
"Fine," Harry grumbled. He studied the board carefully and then smiled brightly. "Bishop to A7," he said smugly. His bishop moved and smashed Ron's rook. "Check," he said proudly to Ron. Finally, he had Ron's king trapped.
Harry lost his smug look, however, when Ron laughed. "I was hoping you'd do that," Ron said. "Queen to A7." He smiled as his queen killed Harry's bishop. "Check and mate," he said crossing his arms.
Harry looked frantically over the board. He was stuck with nowhere to move his king without Ron having a shot at it. He sighed in defeat and hung his head. "Good game," he muttered.
"You lasted longer that time," Ron laughed. Harry looked up and glared.
"Shut up, you git," he said as he lightly shoved Ron from across the hovering table they had conjured to play on.
Then Hermione walked in. She must have been done with her last rounds as Head Girl. "Well, it's good to see you smiling," she said when she saw Harry's small smile. Then she sat down next to him and pulled a book from the inside of her old school bag that held her school robes and books. They had changed into regular clothes a few hours ago because their Hogwart's robes were of no use to them now. "Look, Harry," she said softly. He shoved Ron one more time and looked down at the cover of the book. He laughed. The book was called Pregnant Wizard 101: What you want to know and what you don't. On the cover was a baby boy with light hair and closed eyes.
"Where did you find this?" Harry asked taking the book from his friend.
Hermione took it back and smiled. "Madam Pompfrey gave it to me this morning before we left. I'm glad a first year had gotten locked in the baggage car or I wouldn't have remembered I had it." She flipped it open and started reading. "Hello, pregnant wizard. In this book you will learn everything you need to know about being a pregnant male. Though things are generally the same with pregnant witches, some things will be different... But not to worry! With me everything will be perfect!"
"Who is 'me'?" Harry interrupted.
"I don't know," Hermione replied. "I've already searched for an author's name and couldn't find one."
"Oh," Harry said as he motioned at the book. "Well, keep reading."
Hermione smiled and turned the page. "Chapter 1: Forming the Baby." Harry blushed. He already knew how that had happened. He looked over at Ron to see him blushing as well.
"Hermione, we can skip this chapter," Harry mumbled.
"Alright," Hermione said in disappointment. She would just have to go back and read it later. She turned a few more pages and blushed at a picture she had passed. She cleared her throat. "Chapter 2: The pregnancy... As you read in chapter one, the formation of a baby is a beautiful thing. It's sometimes hard to believe that something so wonderful could have a bad side. With pregnancy comes different obstacles that may sometimes leave you wishing for the baby to come as soon as possible. Such things could include morning sickness, unstable emotions due to a rise in the production of hormones, cravings, weight gain, swollen feet, back pains, a constant need to urinate, mood swings, and the baby kicking. (Believe me when I say that babies can kick surprisingly hard for being so small.)" Hermione laughed at this and turned the page. "Well that chapter was short," she pointed out as she looked over at Harry. He had a scared gleam in his emerald eyes. "What is it, Harry?" she asked in concern.
"I'm not too keen on the idea of getting fat and having to use the loo all the time," Harry answered. "Mood swings? Cravings? All girls have to put up with that?"
Ron laughed. "Some blokes do too."
Harry blushed when he realized he had just referred to himself as a girl. "You know what I meant," he said.
Ron laughed again. "I know, and yes girls have to put up with that. I remember when Fluer was pregnant. Talk about mood swings!" He took on girly, high voice and tried to imitate a French accent. "Why 'ello, Fred..." he said happily. Then his tone changed, "That eez mine! Rawr!" he growled. "One minute she'd be her charming self, and then, BOOM! she was completely mental," he said in his own voice.
"Thank you, Ronald," Hermione said rolling her eyes. "You're scaring, Harry, so shut up!" Harry looked a tad bit paler. "I'm sure you won't be turning mental," Hermione reassured him. "Ron's just exaggerating." She started to read again. "Chapter 3: The First Stage. In chapter two you learned about a few things to expect while pregnant. Each thing on the list will occur in different stages of pregnancy, there are four. In the first stage of a male pregnancy you will fall victim to morning sickness. In some cases unstable emotions could also occur, but it is completely natural for this to last through every stage of your pregnancy and not be limited to only one. Morning sickness is usually the first sign that one is pregnant if you are a male, for we do not have menstraul cycles to judge by. And as males we are not limited to certain times of the month to become pregnant so be careful every time sexual intercourse occurs." Harry and Ron blushed bright red but Hermione seemed to be unfazed. She kept reading. "Morning sickness can last between three to six weeks and can be more severe for some than for others. I would suggest that once you are awake have someone bring you some light food before getting out of bed; it is a known cure for easing morning sickness."
"Well, I wish I had known that before now," Harry chuckled.
"Don't worry, mate," Ron smiled. "I'll bring you some toast in the morning."
"Thanks, Ron," Harry said thoughtfully. "It's already been three weeks so hopefully it won't last much longer."
And then the Express gave a loud whistle and began to slow down. They were pulling up to the platform. "We'll read later," Hermione said as she closed the book and put it back in her bag.
Once the train had completely stopped they stood and gathered all of their belongings. Then they made their way into the crowded corridor. Everyone was happy to be home. Harry smiled at the first year's enthusiasm and climbed off the train. Out of the corner of his eyes he saw a flash a bleach blonde hair and hurriedly looked the other way. Then he saw Sirius, his godfather, and ran to him, leaving Hermione and Ron in the dust. After Voldemort's death Sirius's name had been cleared because Peter Pettigrew had turned himself in. The small mousy man had died after only a week of Azkaban's torture. "Sirius!" Harry exclaimed as he embraced the last living family member he had left. (He stopped counting the Dursleys as family after he turned seventeen, the age of a wizard adult capable of moving out of that horrid house on Number 4 Privet Drive.)
"Harry!" Sirius laughed as he hugged his godson and spun him around. "I've missed you, pup!" Then a strange smell seemed to come off of Harry in waves. It was oddly pleasant and Sirius had a feeling in the back of his mind that he had smelled it once before. He ignored the odd smell and hugged Harry tighter.
"And I you," Harry laughed. Then he leaned into Sirius to whisper in his ear. "What I need to tell you cannot wait too long. You need to know why I can't stay at Grimmauld Place with you. Come to the Burrow tonight and please don't bring the Malfoys," he said, voice slightly breaking on the last word.
"Whatever you say, pup," Sirius said a little sadly as he let his godson go. "I will come alone."
"Thank you," Harry said as he kissed his godfather's cheek and ran to meet Ron with the rest of the Weasleys. Right after he had departed Sirius was joined by none other than Lucius Malfoy and his son.
"Where's Harry, dogbreath?" Lucius asked as he poked Sirius with his silver walking stick. He only used it to conceal his wand because he could walk just fine without it. The cane was something he had just always carried.
"He went back over with the Weasleys," Sirius said as he turned to Lucius and Draco. The first thing he noticed was that Draco's silver eyes were empty yet determined and rimmed in pink as if he had been crying. Other than his sad eyes, the blonde looked as noble and cold as usual. "Let's go home," Sirius said as he helped carry Draco's trunk.
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"Home sweet home," Ron muttered as he dropped his trunk on a small bed in his room. Harry dropped his trunk on the bed opposite Ron's and plopped down next to it. "One day, I'll have a house with bigger rooms," Ron laughed. "And I'll even have a room just for you!"
Harry smiled and then laid back on the bed. "Is Hermione still rooming with Ginny?" he asked.
"Yeah," Ron said as he laid down on his own bed. "I'm sure she's on her way here right now to nag us about-"
"Ron, Harry! Start unpacking!" Hermione exclaimed as she walked in. Harry and Ron burst out laughing but obeyed nonetheless. "Your mother wants us to help clean and prepare for dinner. Bill and Fleur are coming over. Charlie, Fred, and George as well."
Ron groaned as he put away a stack of his underwear. "Is she throwing some sort of party again?" he complained.
"Yes, I am, Ronald," Mrs. Weasley laughed as she swept into the room. She pointed her wand at the boys' trunks and their clothes began to put themselves away.
"Thanks, mum," Ron smiled. Before he could fall back onto his bed Mrs. Weasley grabbed his arm.
"Oh, no you don't," she smiled. "I need you and Harry to get all the gnomes out of the garden."
"Why can't Ginny do it?" Ron whined as he tried to escape his mother's firm grasp.
"Because Ginny and Hermione will be busy in the kitchen with me. Now, hop to," she said pushing Ron and Harry out the door. "Come with me, dear," she smiled at Hermione.
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"Draco!" Lucius Malfoy called from the kitchen at Grimmauld Place.
Draco walked into the room a minute later. "Yes, Father?" he asked.
Lucius went to sit at the small kitchen table and motioned for his son to join him. "What is wrong, my son?" he asked after Draco sat down.
Draco peered up and stared at his father through sad eyes. "Nothing," he said smoothly.
"I would not call that look in your eyes nothing," Lucius said as he reached across the table and grabbed up his only child's hand. "You can tell me."
Draco sighed and squeezed his father's hand. "Have you ever had your entire world torn from your grasp just when you thought it couldn't get any better?" He didn't wait for a reply. "Have you ever watched as the one thing you love most in life just walks away? Have you ever felt each beat of your heart become more and more painful as it slowly breaks into millions of pieces?" A single tear ran down his cheek. "It hurts because I cannot go after him," he whispered. Lucius gently pulled Draco's arm. Draco stood from his chair and walked over to get on his knees in front of his father. Then he wrapped his arms around him and allowed his father's shirt to dry his tears. "It hurts because I want him to be happy even if he isn't with me anymore." Lucius held his son tighter. "He told me he doesn't love me anymore, Father..." Draco cried. "But my heart and soul do not believe him. They cannot believe him... I cannot believe him." He took a deep breath to try and stop crying. Malfoys didn't cry. "He told me he found someone else and I know he was lying... but... if wants me to stay away from him, I shall."
"Oh, Draco," Lucius said sadly as he placed his chin on top of Draco's blonde hair that matched his own. "Have faith. If your heart and soul know that he did not mean what he said then it must be so. Don't worry, we'll fix everything."
Draco nodded and released his father. He stood and resumed his proud Malfoy stature. In his broken heart he knew that the only way to fix anything was to find Narcissa. He left his father and headed back up to the room he would be staying in. There were many plans to be made. After all, he had vowed to keep Harry safe no matter what. His bitch of a mother and aunt would never get within one-hundred feet of Harry, not while Draco still had a breath in his body.
He would die to protect Harry, even if Harry no longer wanted him...
As Draco left the kitchen he failed to notice Sirius just standing in the hallway waiting to get in. Sirius had heard everything. He walked into the kitchen, gave Lucius a quick kiss on the cheek, and then went straight to the fireplace to floo to the Burrow. He had many questions for his godson.
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"Mum! Fred and George are here now!" Ron yelled as he and Harry came back inside from de-gnoming the garden. The Weasley twins were right behind them.
"Hello, everyone!" the twins said together as they pushed past Ron and Harry. Molly Weasley was first in line to hug them.
"I'm glad you foud some time to get away from that shop of yours to come see your family!" she exclaimed.
Fred and George smiled. When Mrs. Weasley released them they cleared their throats. "Is it okay-" Fred started.
"-that we invited guests?" George finished.
"Who are these guests?" Mrs. Weasley asked suspiciously. "If it's more of your rowdy assisstants then absolutely not! It took me weeks to clean up after Christmas!"
"It's not them," Fred laughed.
"Then I guess it's alright," Molly smiled. "Harry invited Sirius as well. There will be plenty of food, have no fear," she said as she looked her twins up and down. "You two are too skinny! Honestly, didn't I raise you to eat better?"
"You did," Fred and George sighed.
"And you, Harry," Mrs. Weasley said as she turned to him. "You're as skinny as a rail!"
Ron and Harry shared a knowing look before Harry laughed. "Not for long." Everyone laughed asuming he meant that after dinner he would no longer be as small as he was, but Ron laughed because he knew what his best friend really meant. "Are you done with Hermione?" Harry asked.
"Yes, dear," Molly smiled. "I'll fetch her out of the kitchen." Then she shot a stern glare at Fred and George. "And you two, this house better still be in order by the end of the night."
"Aye, mother!" the twins bowed. Harry could see their fingers crossed behind their backs.
"You're not making any promises?" he asked lightly.
"Of course not," Fred laughed.
"Who do you think we are? Ron?" George joked.
Ron turned pink as he glared at his brothers. "More like Sirius Black," Hermione laughed as she came into the room.
"Our true idol," Fred and George said placing a hand over their hearts. "Hey, little sis," they greeted Hermione. Then they each wrapped her in a big hug.
"Fred, George," Hermione said happily giving each of them a kiss on the cheek. Harry didn't miss Ron's eyes narrow the slightest bit. "Molly said you wanted me?" she asked Harry after Fred and George departed.
"I want to read some more," Harry smiled brightly. Hermione beamed and laced her arm through Harry's.
"Well, let's go. Come along, Ron," she instructed. Ron fellowed them up to his room. Then they closed the door. Hermione pulled out her wand and summoned the book into her hand. Her and Harry sat on Harry's bed and Ron sat on his. Hermione opened the book to where they had left off on the train and began to read. "In a proven study conducted by well-known healers, it was said that morning sickness was the worst part of being pregnant. In a poll it was second only to giving birth (see Chapter 12). I remember my first day of morning sickness and I merely assumed I had eaten something funny the night before. It never crossed my mind that I could have been carrying a child! Back then no records of pregnant males had ever been kept, but I know I was not the first... and I will not be the last. When I found out about my baby, a son, I was terrified and had no idea how to handle things... It was scary to be so unsure. Hopefully this book will help you, the reader, be more prepared than I was."
"It sounds like something bad happened," Ron said suddenly.
"What are you talking about?" Hermione asked.
"I don't know... I just get the feeling that the author didn't have a too happy ending," Ron said. Truly he could find no words to describe why he felt so sad while he listened to Hermione read. He didn't even know why he felt so sad.
"The book is beginning to sound like a journal," Harry pointed out.
"It is," Hermione agreed. "I really want to know who wrote this book," she sighed. And then suddenly the door opened.
"Sirius," Harry smiled as his godfather walked through the door. He shut it behind himself and hugged Harry when he reached the bed.
"Hello, pup," Sirius smiled. "What do you need to tell me?" he asked as he kissed the top of Harry's head. He could smell that strange scent again, but decided to ignore it.
Hermione moved over and allowed Sirius her previous spot next to Harry. Harry took a deep breath. "You know that I told Draco I don't love him anymore?" Sirius nodded. "Well, it's a lie. I love him more than anything in the world." Harry was silent a few seconds. "I had to do it... it was completely necessary. I had to hurt him... I had to hurt him to save him," he said as a tear ran down his cheek.
Sirius used his calloused hand to wipe the tear away. "Why?" he asked.
"Narcissa and Bellatrix found me and said that if I didn't leave Draco they would kill everyone I loved," Harry mumbled. His eyes were threatening to spill more tears but he held them back. He had cried enough tears and he wanted to be strong now.
"When? Why?" Sirius growled. "I'm not afraid of that bitch and her whore sister!" How dare those two threaten his godson! He felt the sudden urge to strike something because he was so furious.
"I can't take their threats lightly," Harry said as he wiped his watery eyes on his sleeve. "Not now... too much is at risk. Draco needs to stay away from me at all costs, no matter how much I want him to be here."
"But, pup, why? Draco is strong enough to protect you. Surely he is not afraid of his mother?" Sirius said.
"Draco doesn't know she found me. He can't know," Harry said as he reached around Sirius to take the book from Hermione.
"I love you, pup, you know I do," Sirius started, "but why won't you let Draco help? Or at least tell him why he has to hurt?"
Another tear fell down Harry's cheek. "I told you, too much is at risk," he whispered as he showed Sirius the book. Sirius stared at the baby's picture blankly for a few moments before realization hit.
"Pup?" he asked slowly as he stared down at Harry's stomach. He bent forward until his eyes were level with Harry's abdomen. Then he sniffed the air. "That smell," he whispered as he placed a hand on his godson's belly.
"I don't smell anything," Hermione said. Ron sniffed the air.
"My nose is far stronger than yours, 'Mione," Sirius smiled as he stood and scooped Harry into a tight hug. Then he began to dance around and sing, "I'm going to be a grand-dad! I'm so proud! Yay!" Harry laughed at his godfather's childish antics.
"Sirius, quiet down," Harry said trying to shush Sirius's loud mouth. "No one knows but you, Ron, Hermione, and Snape," he said finally putting a hand over Sirius's mouth.
Sirius stopped dancing and Harry moved his hand. "You told that snarky bastard before you told me?" he asked with hurt in his chocolate eyes.
"He was with me when Poppy told me," Harry said apologetically. "Promise me you won't tell anyone," Harry pleaded.
Sirius nodded and put Harry down. "Does Draco know?" he asked.
"No," Harry, Ron, and Hermione said quickly.
"We can't tell him," Hermione said sternly.
"We're not taking any chances... not with my godchild," Ron added. "If Draco knew, do you honestly think he'd stay away?"
"Ron is the godfather?' Sirius asked with a smile. "And no, Draco would be stuck to you like glue," he told Harry. Then he picked up the book from where Harry had dropped it when Sirius had picked him up. He looked at the cover. "I don't know why, but it feels as if I've seen that picture before," he said as he ran a finger over the baby's form. "Strange." Then he heard a low rumble.
Ron, Hermione, and Sirius all looked down at Harry's stomach. Then they all jumped up and ushered Harry to the door.
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On the other side of Ron's bedroom door a pair of identical faces were smiling brighter than the sun. Then they heard hurried footsteps heading their way. Fred quickly pulled back the Extendable Ear and hastily shoved it in George's pocket. Just as the last bit of the flesh-colored string was pushed into George's pocket the door opened. "Dinner's ready!" the twins exclaimed as they hurried away, the group from Ron's room close on their heels.
They headed outside where dinner was to be served in the garden. Sirius ushered Harry to a seat and then sat next him. Hermione took up the seat on his other side and Ron sat next to her. Harry smiled at his friends and looked around the table to see who else was there.
He was slightly surprised to see Oliver Wood and Katie Bell seated across from him. They had two empty seats between them where Fred and George sat. "Oliver?" he asked his old Quidditch captain. "Katie? What are you two doing here?"
"I'm here with Fred," Katie smiled as she leaned over and gave said twin a kiss on the cheek.
"I'm here with George," Oliver laughed but as George lent over for a kiss he pushed the red-head back.
"You will eventually give in," George pouted.
"Not tonight," Oliver said. George sat and sulked. Harry laughed and finished looking around the table. Bill and Fleur were there. They had brought their son, Dorian, who was nestled between his mom and dad. Remus Lupin and Tonks were also present. Harry smiled at their closeness. Ginny was seated next to Tonks like she usually was whenever the Auror was around. And then finally Mr. and Mrs. Weasley sat at the ends of the table.
Mr. Weasley cleared his throat to quiet down the conversations going across the table. "We gather here today in celebration of the end of school for Harry, Ron, and Hermione." At this everyone clapped. "We hope that whatever road your life travels you will enjoy it and remember that we all," he said motioning around the full table, "will be here if you need us." He smiled and snapped his fingers. "And since you're all grown up with the exception of Dorian and Ginny," Mr. Weasley laughed, "we decided to bring out some wine; it's a muggle thing," he whispered. Harry and Hermione laughed. Mr. Weasley popped the cork on the dark bottle of wine and used a spell so that it went around to every eligible drinker's glass.
Ginny rolled her eyes as the bottle passed her. Honestly, she was only a year younger than Harry and Ron. Maybe she would get some wine after her last year at Hogwarts, only one year left.
Once all the wine had been poured Mr. Weasley raised his glass for a toast. Everyone raised their cups. "To the future!" Mr. Weasley exclaimed.
"To the future!" everyone repeated. Then they all took a sip. Everyone but Harry. He merely raised the cup to his lips and pretended to drink. Once he put his cup back on the table Sirius reached over and gulped it down.
"Thanks," Harry smiled.
"Anytime, pup," Sirius laughed.
"Dig in!" Mrs. Weasley smiled as she snapped her fingers and plates of food appeared on the table. The food looked better than anything Harry had ever seen at any Hogwarts feast. He piled his plate high and enjoyed talking about Quidditch with Oliver, occasionally laughing when George would try and steal a kiss. Oliver was a step ahead of the red head every time and was able to dodge the attempt or stick a bite of food in George's mouth instead. Even though he failed George did not give up and he would try again only seconds later. Harry smiled at the unexpected couple.
And for the first time in three days Harry was smiling genuinely. For a few minutes he was able to forget his pain. For those few brief minutes he wasn't worried about Narcissa or Bellatrix...
He was able to believe that everything would be fine.
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NOTE: Another update! You're welcome! For some reason I've been really inspired to write this story so I'm sorry if you would rather have me work on something else... Oh, and I'm sorry if Sirius didn't really have that many questions like I said he did... Oh, well...
Please Review!!!
BYE!