True Colors
I wonder what it'll be like when we meet. If you'll hate me for who I am, for how we'll no doubt meet. Cause one of these days, Deano, I'm gonna send you on a wild roller coaster ride. You'll bump into me on a staged, and for you, rather unusual hunt that will have you guessing and despairing around every corner. And I'll be waiting for you. Oh, I'll be waiting.
That is, when you get better. And you will get better, I'll be watching over you every second of these oncoming days. I'll keep the room nice and warm for you so you don't get too chilly. I'll keep everyone away so I can have you to myself. You're my own little human.
You deserve so much more than this, Dean. So much more that I can't give to you right now.
I think I'd like to get to know your brother, he seems really annoying but kinda nice too. And there's no doubt about how firmly he's glued to you. Like frosting to cake. And you're the cake, because while frosting may be delicious, the truth is there is so much more to you than you think there is. You have so much heart and soul and fight in you than little Sammy could ever dream of having. Everything is likeable about you. And Dean, let me tell you, I'm liking you a lot.
And it's not just the view either. I'm on the outside, which is downright sexy beyond belief, even if you are pale and sick and dying. But no, scratch that last word, you're not dying. I won't let you die.
I'm on the outside, I'm looking in. And your beauty above the surface can't compare to what you look like underneath all that skin, all those bones and organs. Maybe the reapers want you because your soul is so bright, and they want to spoil it and claim it as their own. But they can't have you. I like you just how you are: untouched and brilliant. No taint. And I can only hope that someday you will be mine. I don't think this is too much to ask for.
I wonder, is it wrong to want to fuck someone who's unconscious? Or does that just pertain to dead people? Would pulling back the sheets and lying next to you and sticking my hands down your pants, be considered necrophilia? Not that I would do it now anyway. Not when you're too far gone at this point to feel anything, to smile, to moan, to fuck me back.
I miss your smile. If only the asshole that is John Winchester hadn't come back. Everything would be better now. You would be smiling now.
If you could see me now, I imagined how pissed you'd get. A complete stranger who you don't even know watching over you in some sort of creepy way. I get it, I'm sick and I'm deranged and I'm a loser if I truly have nothing better to do than to watch Dean Winchester sleep. But you're just too sexy to let lie there, to allow Sam to be the sole person to take all of you in. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad he's looking after you. I just want you to know I'm looking after you too, and that while you're lying there nothing will get to you. You're safe with me, Deano.
But as much of a loser as I no doubt am, I respect you, respect your privacy. I haven't breached any territory and let me tell you something, you're lucky for that. Because I want to see you, all of you. I want to see you awake and breathing on your own, not through some piece of shit tube that's masking your unique features. Your heavenly face. And believe me, I would know. I'm an archangel and there's angels out there that aren't even a million miles away from comparing to your beauty. But I sound like a girl, which I know neither you nor I would appreciate. So I'm gonna shut up now.
Just know I won't let those nasty reapers get to you. I can try to fend them off, for a while, but eventually I'll have to find a miracle for you, Dean Winchester. Someday soon, I'll have to resort to my own methods to save you. And I will, all in due time.
Because I want to be a part of your life, a part of your family. And I won't be denied. Not this time. Not you.
You don't know me, but I know you. The beauty and pain in your soul that shines even through your comatose state. We'll meet… soon.
Soon, you'll be all mine for the taking.
FIN