A/N: Thank you so much, reviewers! I'm so glad that it's humorous and you like it aghhh! This chapter is definitely longer and I'm happy with that.

Rated M for the inevitable and this chapter, which contains Nero helping himself to himself.

Returning to the bathroom, Nero seized his hoodie and pants from the floor and pulled them on over his still damp body, mumbling and nearly tearing new sleeves for himself as he tried to process his emotions.

"God damn that idiot…" He grunted through the cloth before poking his head through the shirt, "Dante hits on everything that he sees. Just because he can't resist demons with womanly figures doesn't mean I have to do the same. ..And that fact doesn't make me gay!" He raged, storming out of the bathroom again towards his room.

"Why did I have to moan?" Nero damned himself as he shut his door and slouched against it with a sigh. He cursed again as his thoughts wandered back to explain to him exactly why he reacted in that way, subconsciously reassuring his humiliating response.

In that moment a lot of things escaped him. Such as… reason. But the details of Dante's body were all too real and so easy to call upon from there place at the forefront of Nero's boggled mind. He, without really knowing why, recalled his roommate's embrace…

Dante's hands are so rough and calloused from his work, but they have a gentle feel about the way he manages them. They felt really good on the skin… The way his nails scratched and… those lips though they hardly moved still made him want to kiss back… so soft and moist… How could he kiss so well?

Nero realized his hand had migrated south to the bulge forming in his pants and had actually begun to rub against the tightening denim.

"Damn!" He retracted his deviant appendage and bit it as he pushed off of the door and started to pace. His thoughts were so cluttered-too cluttered. It was just a stupid kiss, why is he getting so worked up? Sighing smoothly he decided it would be best to lay down.

Just as he was settling into his sinking mattress a knock at the door frightened the boy. Nero jumped and gave a panicked glance down at himself. He was at an embarrassingly obvious half-mast and his pants were tightening to an uncomfortable level.

The youth rolled over flat on the bed, forcing an unwanted friction to occur and actually worsen his predicament. Still he was concealed…

"What!" The struggling boy barked to the noise.

"I'm going on a mission." Dante announced through door.

"Well then go." Nero spat, trying not to whimper the statement into a plea.

"Hmph." Dante smirked to himself. Such a smart-ass. He turned and left the kid and the shop without thinking too much on Nero's behavior. He was probably still mad from that kiss.

As soon as Nero was sure Dante was completely gone, he flipped over in a hurry. Wrestling with his zipper, the flustered boy could not get his pants to come off fast enough. Finally he dismissed the tight jeans and shoved down his boxers with a heave of breath.

The cool air hit his erection with a gentle waft causing him to shiver in the sudden relief. Spreading his thighs, Nero wrapped a fist about the base of his cock and slowly began to stroke.

Maybe it was the fact that he was so hard that even this slight touch was relaxing, but he immediately closed his eyes once his coiled fingers made one pump along the length. And instantly upon shutting those lids the image of the elder devil hunter crept in.

Nero gritted his teeth in spite, trying to reject the thoughts, but these fabrications only heightened the pleasure. Nero's teeth sunk into his bottom lip while he tightened his grip and quickened his tempo.

Dante's frosty blue eyes…. His scruffy, strong jaw, his coy lips… those… rough…

"H-Hands…" Nero bucked against his own human fist as he imagined Dante's in place of it. A soft series of inhales grew into louder pants and then yelps.

Soon, Nero felt the boiling hot sensation of building release. His thumb sailed over the head as pre-come leaked and increased his pace further. His toes curled and his back arched.

"D…Dante…" He panted the name deliriously. The fact that this situation was fueled by that arrogant bastard was escaping the boy at the crest of his carnal pleasure.

Nero came hard into his hand and spilled over onto his stomach. His body, free of tension, relaxed or rather collapsed and the bed creaked under the sudden weight. His breath was short and scarce. He lay there for a moment, a pile of heat and come and exhaustion staring at the floorboards.

This had never happened before. Masturbation was usually brought about by the mood he was in, never by force due to full-on arousal. Arousal initiated by Dante, no less. You definitely come much harder when the latter occurs.

"And I just fucking showered…" Nero was exhausted but pushed himself to get up for another washing. He didn't need Dante coming back to find him sweaty and disheveled, there would be no end to the torment.

After cleaning himself a second time, Nero donned new clothes and headed downstairs. He scanned the shop and realized Dante still hadn't returned from his mission. That's probably for the best, Nero thought.

He still wasn't completely sure of himself and this whole series of events had him questioning, maybe fearing, what would happen when Dante returned. Almost impatiently, Nero's stomach rumbled and urged him into the kitchen.

It wasn't surprising that there was not much to choose from, as there never is. Peering inside the fridge there were stacks of old leftover pizza boxes and beer.

Without demon hunting, Dante would be the most out-of-shape slob…

Nero mused as he grabbed a couple of slices from the top box and traipsed back into the living room feeling tired. He crashed on the couch and lazed back with his head on the armrest as he chomped away the cold pizza.

And as he lounged, the topic of Dante once again slipped into his pensive state. He'd been avoiding thoughts on his most recent activity since the shower by reciting everything he was doing in his head.

Wash hair. Wash hair. Wash hair. Put on pants. Put on pants. Get pizza. Eat pizza. Don't think about Dante. Don't think about Dante! But the more tired he became and once he had finished his pizza he had to face what he had done.

"God…" Nero rubbed his eyelids and squeezed the bridge of his nose trying to wince away his disgust with himself.

I seriously got off to the thought of Dante…He groaned and shoved his face into the couch's back. Maybe I'm just sex deprived? I mean Kyrie definitely never gave me anything even remotely close to affection. I've been without anyone's touch but my own for this many years… So Dante makes this bet and I get caught up because I'm a young man with needs, damn it.

Nero was starting to feel a little better with his reasoning. I don't have to be in love with Dante to want to… He didn't even want to finish the thought, it actually made him a bit ill.

"This is ridiculous," He muttered, "The man's a complete asshole." Saying it out loud made Nero feel like he might actually get some sleep.

Unfortunately for him though, when you're falling asleep your thoughts do what they want.

Dante returned to Devil May Cry an hour later, content with the way the mission went. Smirking to himself he hung up and put away his weapons before even noticing Nero passed out on the couch.

"Tch." He snorted as he approached the boy.

The whole couch was available yet Nero was curled up tight in the right corner, like a freaking puppy or something. His legs were crossed at the ankles and both hands were nuzzled up against his relaxed face upon the pillow. That still, plump, boyish face with calm lips and gently arched eyebrows that suggested he was in a deep sleep. His white hair fell in his eyes and over the pillow.

Damn he's cute… Dante sat on the table as he examined the kid.

He couldn't stop his hand as it reached out to touch the boy's side. Nero didn't stir. He leaned close and his hand supplied pressure. His mouth was so close to Nero's, breathing in his soft exhales…

"D-Dan…te…" The young devil hunter mumbled in his slumber. The elder smirked at the unconscious invite and couldn't hold back any longer. He pressed his lips against Nero's. Not half a moment of bliss later he was slammed back across the room, the sting of the devil bringer biting a red throbbing mark on his cheek.

"You fucking pervy old man!" Nero unclenched his fist. Dante immediately recovered and shrugged off the blow, acting as if nothing had happened.

"Hey now, you wanted it." He defended, standing and walking passed his flustered partner to the kitchen.

"What in holy hell made you think I wanted that!" Nero pursued the nonchalant man with a piercing glare and fierce waving arms. Dante ignored Nero and began sifting through the freezer.

He pulled out a strawberry sundae with a giddy smile and leaned against the counter as he grabbed a spoon from the drawer and dug in. "Hey!" Nero nudged him.

"You practically had an orgasm in your sleep," Dante exaggerated, "Oh Dante! Ungh!" Nero blushed harshly at the noises spewing from his friend. He had no proof if that did or didn't happen but there was no way he'd admit to it.

"You're lying," Nero pouted as he hopped up to sit on the counter beside him. Dante spooned a mouthful of strawberry and shrugged.

"Whatever lets you sleep at night, kid." Nero dug his nails into the edge of the counter, his devil bringer may have chipped more than the finish with his reaction.

"You know, you're not making me fall in love with you so much as sexually harassing me every chance you get. You accuse me of being gay, but really what you're doing is so much worse than any evidence you "claim" to have against me." Nero pointed out.

Triumphantly he swiped a finger through the side of Dante's sundae glass and tongued off some ice cream. He elder hunter watched every movement intently, thought Nero didn't seem to notice what he was doing.

"I keep getting distracted from the romance. You're too cute to keep my hands off and why would I make a bet in the first place if I wasn't a little attracted to you. So what?"

Dante admitted. Nero couldn't tell if he was being serious or not. He suspiciously eyed the hunter but made no comment. His finger dove for another taste of sundae. Before it could retreat between his lips, Dante snatched his wrist.

"Dante-" The kid scrunched up his face, frustrated as he tried to pull away.

Dante easily brought the digit into his mouth causing Nero to cease fidgeting. His tongue swirled swiftly about the finger and his lips pursed as he bobbed once before retracting, leaving a silver line connecting to the tip and his bottom lip for a moment before he licked it off. Nero swallowed the lump in his throat and finally remembered how to blink.

"My sundae." Dante warned with the wagging his finger in burning faced youth then left him to process the action.

Nero hesitated, leaning forwards and then back a few times. Each rock was withering away his will power. Finally he pushed off the counter and chased after Dante.

"Hey!" He turned the elder by his shoulders and seized his collar.

"Hm?" Dante raised his eyebrows, half-expecting another hit to the face. He kind of liked being Nero's punching bag.

"Are you prepared to follow that up?" Nero threatened. Dante was taken aback by the comment. "Answer me, dammit!" Nero pushed himself against his partner, his knee shoving against the inside of his thigh.

Dante smirked and seized his waist, forcing their hips together and their faces close. Nero whimpered desperately and tried for a kiss but Dante moved his face aside so all he received was a scruffy cheek.

"Coming around so soon?" He cooed, hands roaming up Nero's hoodie in the front. His fingers trailed over the hardened muscles and felt the rise and fall of Nero's chest.

"Shut up, this isn't love," The boy growled. Dante gave mocking frown and sighed.

"Well then I guess we're done here." The elder's hands retracted and he held them above his head comically.

"W-what?" Nero gave a start at the withdrawing man.

"You can't have any of this until you feel the same way I feel about you. Otherwise you're using me for sex and that's wrong, kid." Dante twirled out of Nero's grasp and practically skipped to his desk where he sat in his usual place.

"The way you feel about- What in the hell, you…you prick! You're just saying that asshole!" Nero punched the desk violently, producing a smoldering crater in the corner of it.

"Whoa, slow down with those cute pet names, I'm shy." Dante chuckled and put a magazine over his face. "We'll pick this up again tomorrow, I'm done."

Nero couldn't respond. He opened his mouth to but there were no words to express just exactly how pissed off he was. He'd just thrown himself at Dante and was completely denied. So enraged he couldn't breath, Nero turned on his heel and headed for the door.

"Where ya goin!" Dante called, lifting up the magazine from his eyes to yell at the boy.

"For. A. Walk." Nero spoke through viciously clamped teeth. As he slammed the door he added, "And I hope to God that there's a demon that wants to pick a fight."

Dante lowered the article and gave a snort. He'd pissed off the kid pretty bad. But that meant that Nero really wanted him.

This wasn't love, not yet anyways it was only lust. Though lust is a huge step for merely the first day of this bet. Dante smiled to himself contently. Not bad at all.

TBC