Draco felt a mixture of more panic and deja vu when he turned around. His heart started to beat faster, if that was possible. He would be surprised if Harry couldn't hear his heart beating from where he was standing. He knew the last time he had a panic attack and Harry snuck up on him it resulted in an almost deadly duel which definitely was not helping Draco's anxiety right now. He felt himself reach for his wand instinctively. The scars on his torso were suddenly hypersensitive and it felt as if they were being ripped open. He crossed his arms to hide his trembling hands. "What do you want, Potter?" He spat. Even though Harry apologized he still wasn't convinced Harry wasn't about to hex him. He tried to steady his breathing but his chest was tight and only allowed him to take small and shallow breaths. Even though the weather outside wasn't too hot thanks to the wind Draco felt like he was burning up. His robes felt too constricting. Even after all the alcohol he had consumed, he suddenly felt too sober for this.
Why did he have to come tonight? Why did he have to come to the astronomy tower? Why did Harry have to sneak up on him like this?
Harry held up his hands, almost spilling his drink in the process. "I'm not here to fight or anything." He said as he stepped towards the railing but remained a decent distance away from Draco. Draco wasn't sure if he believed him given their last few interactions. Honestly, given their interactions as a whole.
"Why are you here then?" He asked, raising an eyebrow at Harry. Surely Harry didn't follow him up here just to talk. He kept a cautious eye on the other male.
Harry shrugged as he took a sip of his drink. The only source of light came from the moon and stars, but Draco could still see how bright Harry's eyes were. "Same reason as you." He said before turning to look up at the sky. The moonlight wasn't bright, but it was bright enough to show the age on Harry's face. He wasn't old by any means, he was hardly in his mid-twenties, but the war had taken a toll on him. Draco could see the tiredness on him. Being an auror probably didn't help that either. Draco could only imagine the sleepless nights Harry had while trying to solve endless cases.
Not that Draco cared because he certainly did not.
"I'll let you be, then," Draco said, straightening his posture.
Harry glanced over at Draco, "The towers big enough for the two of us, Malfoy." He said before offering him his cup. "You look like you could use a drink."
Draco couldn't help the glare that formed on his face but he accepted the drink. Though, he was a little glad Harry had insinuated he could stay, even if it wasn't said. Not because he wanted Harry's company but because he didn't know where else he'd go, the castle had too many bad memories and most places were too hard for him to be in. The room of requirement was one of the last places he saw Goyle. He couldn't go anywhere near the Slytherin dorms because all he could think about was Snape. He couldn't go anywhere but here. This place still held too many memories, though. So, Draco leaned against the railing again. He took a sip of the drink Harry had given him and welcomed the burning sensation the alcohol gave him. He didn't know what to say to Harry but considering Harry seemed to focus his attention on the stars, Draco didn't think he actually had to say anything.
The silence was tense and loud. Draco didn't know if he preferred that over the screams that he could still hear.
He handed the drink back to Harry, only realizing after drinking half of it that he'd been hogging it. "Thanks," Harry muttered after taking the cup.
Draco nodded in response. The tension was almost unbearable. He thought he would've been better off staying in the dining hall. He just wanted to shrink himself away. Harry handed him the cup again and Draco accepted it again. He needed more alcohol if he was going to be stuck in this uncomfortable situation.
"It's hard to be back in the castle for me too," Harry said after a few minutes. He was still looking up towards the sky. Draco tensed up, he didn't want to talk about this. Not with Harry. "I almost didn't come back after the war. I knew how horrible eighth year was going to be." Draco didn't know why Harry was telling him any of this. He was so confused. "I couldn't eat in the dining hall for months. Every time I tried all I could see were bodies, even all those months after the war. I could even smell everything; the blood, debris, smoke, all of it." Harry must've needed to talk because Draco didn't know why else they were having this conversation.
Draco wondered if Harry was confiding I'm him to make him feel bad. Surely that's why. "Why are you telling me this?" He asked, his voice wasn't harsh. Instead, it was slightly softer with a hint of confusion.
Harry shrugged as he turned around, now resting his back on the railing. "I was here that night, you know," Harry said, looking over at Draco. "Would you have accepted his help?"
There it was.
Draco felt himself tense up even more, if that was possible. "Does it matter?" He asked, the harshness in his tone was back.
"I suppose not." Harry said as he scratched at his chin.
Draco clenched his teeth, "Potter," he warned. "If this is your way of-"
"Answer the question."
Draco scoffed before taking another sip of the drink, "Answering your question won't bring him back." He knew it was a harsh thing to say, but Draco couldn't help it. He was angry now. The situation wasn't as simple as accepting Dumbledore's help. He needed to protect himself. He needed to protect his parents.
"Neither will avoiding the question." Harry said, taking the cup back from Draco.
Draco took a deep breath, Harry raised an eyebrow at Draco as he took a sip. "You did what you had to do to protect your people, just as I did mine. It wasn't as simple as accepting his help, Potter." He gripped the railing, looking down. "He would've killed my parents and when he found me, he would've killed me. So, to answer your question," he said. He risked taking a look at Harry, "No, I wouldn't have." He said simply. They were making eye contact now. Harry looked like he was lost in thought but Draco couldn't tell what Harry was thinking. It looked like it was Draco's turn to start talking. "The dark lord was practically using the manor as a second home at that point. He held our lives over my head all the time. I had to protect them. I had to kill him."
"Except you didn't kill him," Harry said, taking another sip of his drink.
Because I'm a coward, Draco wanted to say. Instead, he said, "I couldn't." but it was almost a whisper. He looked away again, diverting his attention to the sky again. "I wasn't a fan of Dumbledore but that didn't mean I wanted him dead." As Draco got older, he realized he never hated Dumbledore. He was just a rich kid with entitlement issues.
More silence followed which now had even more tension.
Harry looked down at his feet or anywhere that wasn't Draco. "What was it like?" Harry asked curiously, "To be around Voldemort?"
Draco scoffed, "What is this? An interrogation?"
Harry shrugged, "Just making conversation."
"You're shit at conversation, Potter." Draco said, getting a weird feeling of deja vu again.
Harry smirked, "I thought I was shit at apologies." He said, a hint of amusement in his voice.
Draco found the comment only a little amusing. "That too."
"I don't see you making better conversation." Harry pointed out.
"Who said I wanted to have a conversation?" Draco asked. "You're shit at manners too, Potter." He said but his tone indicated only slight amusement. "You're getting quite the list of things you're shit at."
And just like that, they went from hot to cold. He wasn't sure how they'd gone from a tense conversation about the war and Voldemort to now this but draco wasn't complaining. He was glad to not have to think about the war.
Harry chuckled and shook his head, "I can't be good at everything." He said with a shrug.
"I suppose not." Draco said, only now letting his grip loosen on the railing.
Seconds later, another joined them in the astronomy tower. Draco now turned to the source of the footsteps. He saw a head of fire red hair but he couldn't tell who it was for another few seconds.
"Draco!" George said with a drunken smile, "Harry! There you two are!" He said as he stumbled. "No bloody noses, no broken bones, no fighting? Never thought I'd see the day!" He slurred as he approached the railing and gripped onto it.
George was closer to Draco than Harry so Draco reached out to steady George. "Oi, how much did you have to drink?" Draco asked, keeping his hands on George's back.
George shrugged as he grasped onto the railing for support. "Enough to tolerate the apologies." He said as he leaned against it. He was making Draco nervous so Draco gently pulled him away from it and making George use him for support. This wasn't their first time doing this for either of them. They took turns being a drunk mess and it just so happened it was George's turn. Draco was a little happy he had sobered up.
"Where's Luna? Maybe we should bring you to her so she can get you home." Harry said, banishing the drink he'd been holding to help support George.
Draco rolled his eyes. Back to hot. "He can't apparate like this, Potter." He said, moving George to where he could sit on the ground. "Are you trying to get him splinched?" He said before sitting next to George. He patted around his pockets, smiling as he pulled out a Sober Up potion and handing it to George who shook his head. "Take the bloody potion George."
Harry just stood there, watching them.
"Don't want to be sober." George mumbled. If Draco hadn't spent so much time around George he wouldn't have known what he said but Draco's now fully fluent in drunk George.
Draco took the cork off of the vile, "I don't recall giving you an option." He said, gently forcing George's hair back. He could see Harry take a protective step forward but he didn't care. George sighed and opened his mouth enough for Draco to pour some of the potion in before offering some to Harry. He wasn't sure how much Harry had drank.
Typically he would've let George stay drunk but considering the location they were at he didn't think it was a good idea for George to be drunk like this. He could get pretty emotional and become a handful when emotional. Not that Draco typically would've minded but this wasn't the time or place. This sort of behavior was usually reserved for one of their flats.
"What's this?" Harry asked, raising an eyebrow. "What did you give him?"
Back to hot. Again.
"Sober up potion, Potter. Do you want to deal with him drunk like this?" Draco snapped, pulling another vile of sober-up potion out of his pocket. They were meant for him, Pansy, and Blaise but he was sure they'd be fine. Harry examined the vile and pulled out his hand, doing a spell to see if it was good or not which caused Draco to roll his eyes. "It's not bloody poison." He took the cork off his before taking a sip, "See I just took some too." Though, his tone was a little annoyed.
George was slowly sobering up slowly. He could open his eyes and now they were only drunkenly half open. "It's effective too. Draco's great at potions." He said, also slurring less. One could understand him now.
"Let's go, George." Draco said before standing up and dusting himself off and offering George a hand which George took. It took a second for Draco to pull him up since he was pulling up George's entire weight. "I'll get you back to Luna."
And with that, the two left Harry in the astronomy tower by himself.
Getting George down the stairs was a struggle and Draco was borderline piggybacking him. He knew at some point George was decently coherent enough to walk but just refused. He knew how long the potion took to kick in but he figured he'd play George's little game.
Once they got to the bottom of the stairs George walked on his own without assistance. "Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter alone and not fighting? Never thought I'd see the day." George said with a smirk.
Draco rolled his eyes, "I'm capable of being civil, you prat." He said before gently shoving George. It was with enough force for George to stumble only a little.
George laughed as he got back into step, "What did you talk about?" He asked curiously.
Draco shrugged, "A whole lot of nothing really."
"But no fighting? Not even a hex? No glare? No name-calling?" George questioned.
Draco laughed, "Maybe a few glares and some name-calling. No physical harm."
George smiled, "Progress is progress." He said, playfully nudging Draco.
Draco shrugged again, he didn't care about the said progress with Harry. He didn't want to be his friend so he didn't see the point as long as they could be civil when around each other. Which he hoped wasn't often now that he was friends with George. He knew seeing Harry was inevitable but if they could limit their interactions that would be preferred.
They eventually made it back to the great hall. They hadn't been gone too long, but long enough for people to start leaving. Draco felt a little relieved. People were overwhelming.
"George!" Luna greeted, hugging George and then hugging Draco, "Draco, thank you." She already knew their routine. George was looking a bit better without the alcohol making him emotional. She didn't like when he drank which was one of the reasons Draco occasionally gave George the sober up potion.
Maybe they shouldn't drink as much anymore. They both seemed to get a little too emotional when alcohol was involved. Draco made a mental note to bring this up.
Next week. Why start now? Especially when a house elf was offering him a glass of champagne. He took two. He just hoped he could survive the rest of the night and wouldn't have to report back with Jennifer about anything too bad.