After a particularly long and frustrating week, mainly spent arguing with the Charmings and how they thought the town should be run, Regina finally had enough and made the remarkably simple decision of putting them in charge.
"So how long do you give them before they screw up and come begging for help?" Emma's bright green eyes sparkled with mischief.
Sitting in the diner with Emma was quickly becoming a routine and Regina had found the blonde was quite open with her opinion of her birth parents; she was under no illusion as to the mess that was about to occur with Snow and Charming trying to run things. While most of the town still saw her as the former Evil Queen, and now deposed mayor, Emma still treated her the same as when she first arrived in town several years ago.
"I've no idea what you're talking about, dear." A smug grin on Regina's face kept trying to form and she had to focus on avoiding it.
"Uh huh. So we're talking weeks then." Picking up her hot chocolate to let the heat warm her hands, chilled by the autumn weather, Emma smirked at her. "Any ideas on what you're gonna do now? Just so I can pre-empt any calls from concerned citizens that see you doing nefarious things. Like going grocery shopping or mowing the lawn."
If Regina was being honest with herself, her decision to step down as mayor after so many years of being in control was somewhat impulsive, but it would mean a lot less stress in her day-to-day life. At least temporarily, Regina supposed. Who knows; maybe the Charmings would exceed their low expectations and actually manage not to implode the town.
"Hmph, as if I would be doing manual labour. It will mean more time for myself and Henry." Her expression softened at the thought of her, well, their son. "Maybe I could take up baking? Give Granny something new to complain about." More than a few of the town meetings had overrun due to Mrs Lucas' penchant for raising issues that needed the council's attention.
The older werewolf stuck her head out of the kitchen and waved a spatula in their direction. "I heard that, Regina Mills!" Her tone and the grin on her face belied the anger.
"Just try to avoid poisoning anyone this time, please?" Not that long ago, Emma's remark would have set off Regina's ire and cause fireballs (or worse) to be thrown. Perhaps it was the amused look the blonde was giving her that stopped her from wanting to tear her limb from limb for even hinting she would use another sleeping curse.
"I'm all out of cursed apples, dear. The town will be safe from me, relatively speaking."
~~~~~~~~ SQ ~~~~~~~~
The following week, after returning home from the supermarket and putting everything away, Regina found herself at something of a loose end one morning. Without the town to run, her time was no longer consumed with budgets, reports, or all the other minutiae it required, and for the first time in years she had nothing that urgently needed her attention.
Making herself a coffee, she sat at the kitchen island with her cell and tried to entertain herself by texting Emma.
MyDamnMayor: "I'm bored."
It was several minutes later that the blonde replied and it made her smirk.
SheriffSwan (cell): "Some of us have jobs."
Taking a gulp of her coffee, Regina tapped out a quick message.
MyDamnMayor: "And? You're probably eating bear claws in the office."
With Henry at school, the house was quiet, only broken by the sound of the occasional car passing outside or the burble of the heating system fighting the encroaching cold weather. Despite what she'd told Emma in the diner, Regina was quite happy to tend to her garden and made herself a note to check her gardening tools were in good order before she actually needed them. Trying to rake up dead leaves with half the teeth missing was an exercise in frustration.
SheriffSwan (cell): "Am not. Pongo escaped again. Go read a book or something, surf the net."
Regina snickered to herself. She wasn't sure if it was remnants of the curse at play or simply terrible luck that meant Pongo regularly went AWOL and gave Emma a long chase. Emma's suggestion did have merit though; she couldn't remember the last time she read something that wasn't dull (town-related) or uninspiring (fiction suitable for Henry's age).
Taking her mug with her, she went to her office and powered up her laptop. Not the newest, it took its time to boot up and it was a good minute or more before the apple logo disappeared so it could be replaced with the login prompt. Settling comfortably into her chair, she sipped her coffee while idly tapping her password in with one finger and then waited for it to be verified.
Her desktop wallpaper was a photo of herself, Henry and Emma, taken in Granny's and close to Christmas based on the festive decorations in the background. It always raised her spirits to see; the first evidence of the truce she'd agreed with Henry's birth mother, to put his needs before their feud and ensure he was safe.
When her laptop had finally finished doing whatever it was that was so vital for starting up, Regina put her mug down on the coaster a safe distance from it (she'd yet to spill one over her laptop and didn't want to end her successful streak now). Tapping the 'Mail' icon with her mouse, she chuckled at the slow trickle of nervous emails that had started to arrive from the various department heads that ran the town's infrastructure. The Charmings had been officially in office for two weeks now and had yet to make any major errors, though that was probably due to the trained staff the former mayor employed rather than their own efforts.
"Nothing like trial by fire." Regina chuckled to herself as she tapped the icon for 'Safari'. It took her laptop a moment to think about it, but she was greeted with the browser showing a list of her most frequently visited websites. She tried not to lose her smile at seeing almost all of them were related in some way to her former position of mayor. Between saving the town on a regular basis and caring for Henry, it appeared her laptop didn't get used for much else. If nothing else, her skills at typing and word-processing would be useful as she easily tapped in the address for Google.
It wasn't long after the first curse broke that Emma introduced her to the wonders of the modern internet. It took Emma even less time to introduce anti-viral software, ad-blockers and a stern admonishment that just because something said it was free, looked ok and seemed reputable, it absolutely wasn't and Regina should avoid it at all costs. Especially if she didn't want Emma to spend all her time reinstalling all the programs that got infected and having the brunette confess as to what embarrassing thing it was that she'd clicked on.
By now, the former mayor was well-versed in who to avoid (Nigerian princes offering money if only she'd help them in their hour of need), what to avoid ('free' software downloads) and where to avoid ("4chan. Seriously Regina, just don't go there. No matter how curious you are, I guarantee it will give you nightmares that make everything you've seen in life appear tame.").
Her search for recommended fiction wasn't initially very successful, though it did take her to Reddit (the front page of the internet, or so it claimed) and all the different communities it housed. Admittedly it was another website Emma had warned her of, mainly that she could easily spend hours of her life browsing depressing content in something the blonde referred to as a 'doomscroll', but it did have a lot to see.
Signing up for an account with a randomly-generated username and configuring it to her liking didn't take long. She was soon browsing like a pro and time passed...
Taking a sip of her coffee, she almost spat it out at how cold it had become and glanced at the clock; almost two hours had slipped by without her noticing. She stretched her stiff back and closed the random collection of tabs that had led her to the 'MadeMeSmile' page. Perhaps it was her uncertain future that had prompted her need for a little amusement that led her down that particular rabbit hole.
Going out to the kitchen and making a fresh coffee cleared her head of the slightly spacey funk she'd found herself in. Maybe it wasn't a 'doomscroll' exactly, but she'd been scrolling content for hours without realising and it had left her half expecting the room to start scrolling upwards too.
"Ouch." Rolling her head from side-to-side had popped the vertebrae in her neck with a symphony of crackles as she walked back to her office. Her laptop still displayed the last tab she'd opened, the Reddit homepage, and she clicked on the search option.
Uncertain fingers paused over the keyboard as Regina looked around her office. She was home, alone, and this was her laptop; she didn't share it with anyone, especially Henry (though he could probably guess her password if he had long enough). "You're a big girl Gina, there's nothing wrong with just looking for something suitable to read..." It only took a few taps on the keys.
As if a whole new world opened before her eyes, adult content of every type imaginable flowed down the page.
"Oh my." Trying not to fidget, she clarified her search to 'adult fiction' and looked relieved as some of the more... questionable content was removed from the results. Another hurried glance around the room was made to reassure herself that no one was watching before she clicked on one of the search results.
A soft gasp slipped out before her hand clapped over her open mouth.
"People write about... about that!?" Regina closed her eyes tightly before re-opening them again, maybe if she willed it strongly enough it would magically disappear. To her dismay, the tab was still open and the work of erotic fiction still on screen. She fidgeted again and fanned herself with one hand. Being the Evil Queen meant she was well aware of her sexuality and could use it as the finest of weapons when called for, but seeing it (proudly!) on display for anyone to see was something else.
If her eyebrows could reach any higher, they'd be off her forehead as she read the accompanying comments. One in particular caught her eye.
"Loved this, hope ya don't mind but I turned it into a script for a post on GWA."
A link, highlighted in blue, was connected to the last word.
Hovering her mouse pointer over it, Regina checked the address before she clicked. It was yet another lesson drummed into her by Emma about being safe on the modern web, and it had been a big hit to her pride that she'd had to accept the blonde's help.
Reading the sidebar with the description of what 'GWA' stood for had her mouth dropping open in surprise for a second time. Apparently it was an acronym for 'Gone Wild Audio', a community for anyone that enjoyed listening to or posting audio clips of a very adult nature.
Scrolling through the list of posts, the titles contained all sorts of what she assumed were content warnings or categories. It took her a few minutes to find what appeared to be something relatively tame to click on and after a brief introduction on what had been uploaded, there was another link to the audio clip itself.
Nervously biting her lip and despite the mansion being empty, Regina still plugged her headphones in and settled them over her ears before opening the file.
"How bad could it be? Some moaning and groaning for a minute at best. Hmph. It's not like sex is something new to you." Technically Regina was old enough to consider her pension if she took into account all the years that had accumulated during the loop. She was sure the magic of the curse was the only reason she was still (mostly) sane after spending the best part of thirty years living the same day.
"Oh hey baby, you're home... was your day okay? Not really? Aww, let me help you... Just close your eyes for me and relax... I know baby, you've been working so hard, so let me take care of you."
Deciding to take the plunge and indulge herself in this little fantasy conjured up by the woman's voice whispering sweetly in her ears, Regina leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes.
After a few minutes, she tore her headphones off and slammed the lid down on her laptop, breathing hard.
"What. The. Hell."
It took her a lot longer than she'd like to admit to calm down and find the courage to re-open her laptop. The offending file had thankfully been automatically paused, but the player was still open and the cheery bright orange (she loathed the colour with a passion normally reserved for Snow) traffic cone icon was still displayed in the dock at the bottom of the screen.
"It's just make-believe; it's all in my imagination." She mumbled, surprised at just how quickly it had affected her.
Reluctantly settling the headphones back on her head again, Regina briefly wondered why she was going to torture herself with more before pressing the play button. Maybe all those years spent in a fairytale version of 'Groundhog Day' really had affected her after all.
"... you like being held on my lap, don't you baby? Safe and relaxed without a care in the world."
No, she didn't like that, not at all. She wasn't picturing that exact scenario and wishing that the woman holding her had blonde hair or green eyes. Nope. Nope. Nope... The denial was still strong as she let the audio continue to play.
"It's ok... Can you feel my hands gently running through your hair?"
Feeling silly for almost agreeing with the unknown woman's voice, out-loud no less, the blush on Regina's cheeks deepened.
Growing up in a touch-starved environment created by her 'delightful' mother, and then having to keep her distance as Queen, followed by being the mayor, had pushed her to crave someone's touch, even something as simple as a hug. The separation between Henry and herself before the truce with Emma had proven especially hard on her because of it.
Running her own hands through her hair proved surprisingly therapeutic, as long as she managed to avoid the strap of her headphones. She quietly sighed and relaxed into her chair, wishing she had someone real to do this with. A flash of blonde hair went across her closed eyes and she brushed the thought away.
"That's it... lean against me so I can put my arms around you... How are you feeling now?"
It was a fantasy, right? It didn't mean anything; it certainly wasn't real or made her feel better in any way, not at all... So why did she feel like telling the nonexistent woman she was helping, that she did feel slightly better?
Thinking back, Regina tried to remember the last time she was actually held like the woman was describing and let her guard down around someone. She realised that Graham didn't really count, since he didn't have much choice in proceedings, so she had to think further back, before the curse was cast. Her face fell as it dawned on her that the last person she felt safe with and cared for was her father.
"Daddy..." She sighed, thinking not for the first time that the curse had taken more from her than what her revenge was worth.
"Would you like me to help you feel better, baby?" The woman's voice was warm and affectionate, coaxing as it tingled down her spine. "It's ok to feel needy, especially after a hard day at work. Let me untuck your shirt, so I can rub your back..."
The faint sounds of cloth being moved could be heard through Regina's headphones.
Shifting on her chair, her blouse was uncomfortable being tucked into the top of her pencil skirt; her clothing habits were hard to break, despite not having to dress up for the office any more. What could it hurt if she made herself more comfortable? She leaned forward just enough to untuck her blouse, kicking her legs out to one side of the desk and toeing off her heels in the process.
"You have such soft skin... Especially here." What could only be the sound of a gentle kiss on skin was heard. "Your neck is soo soft..."
In spite of there being no one else in the room, Regina's hand flew to her neck in surprise as she shivered. She never let anyone near there, it made her feel far too vulnerable, no matter how much she'd fantasised about someone's lips just over her pulse. Biting, leaving delicate little marks, maybe letting Emma's nails scratch... No.
Again, she consigned intimate thoughts of her Sheriff to the oubliettes in the darkest corners of her mind, never to be thought of. Not even in the early mornings, when she was half-awake and still dreaming of someone to share her bed. Someone that could hold her and chase away the crushing loneliness she sometimes felt. Another part of her brain wanted to know since when Emma was 'her Sheriff'.
"It's alright baby, I promise you're safe with me." Another kiss was heard though Regina's headphones and it encouraged her to lightly rub her own neck, helping her lose herself in the woman's words.
Feeling overheated (she wouldn't admit to being turned on by any of this, no), Regina undid another button on her blouse. With three already open, the fourth revealed far more of her lace underwear and flushed skin to anyone that would have been watching.
"That's it, get nice and comfy. Let all the stress out." The woman's gentle laughter rang out in Regina's ears. "Aww, aren't you adorable? Snuggling up to me like that."
Regina should have been offended; she was long past the age of doing such childish things as 'snuggling' with another person (Henry didn't count). It certainly didn't give her warm feelings or the urgent desire to go and cuddle someone.
"No more worries, it's just you and me here..." Another gentle laugh. "You're getting so kitten-ish baby, the way you keep nuzzling against me. Is that what you want; to be my little kitten?"
Petplay. The woman was referring to petplay. It wasn't something Regina was intimately familiar with given her path in life, but she knew of it; one cannot know of werewolves without hearing some of the bawdy tales about them after all.
Not having to make decisions for herself sounded appealing, even if it was for only a short time.
"Hm? Is that a yes? Ok, let's go to our bedroom."
Debating if she should follow what was happening in the fantasy, Regina squirmed in her chair and bit her lip. "What could it hurt?" She paused the recording and carried her laptop upstairs to her bedroom.
Setting it down on the bed and safely away from the edge, she made sure the speaker volume wasn't too loud and resumed the playback.
"You can get undressed if you want to baby, as little or as much as you feel comfortable with, there's no judgement here." The squeak of bedsprings was heard. "I'm going to lean back against the headboard, so join me when you're ready, ok?"
Pausing the recording again, she unzipped her pencil skirt and wiggled it down her legs. A gleeful, childish kick sent it flying to land near the laundry basket before she made short work of unfastening the few remaining buttons on her blouse. As with her clothing habits, her penchant for neatness had her picking up the skirt when she dropped her blouse into the basket.
Feeling sufficiently undressed and clad in only her underwear consisting of bra, panties, garter belt and stockings (all in a matching set of black lace; she wasn't a peasant and thought she deserved to feel sexy even if no one else would see it), she gingerly climbed onto the bed. The drag of the sheets across her stockings sent shivers up her spine as she relaxed and tapped the play button.
"That's my girl. Kittens don't really need clothes, do they? Clothes get in the way of petting, and... stroking." Regina could hear the smile in the woman's voice. "I wouldn't be able to run my hands over you... over your legs, up your ribs..."
With her eyes closed, Regina copied the movements the woman was making in the recording, sending a pleasant warmth through her skin.
"To your chest. My kitten loves being petted here, doesn't she?"
A bright pink colour suffused Regina's cheeks as she almost moaned out a "yes!" She lifted herself up enough to unfasten the clasp on her bra and throw it over the edge of the bed. If she was going to enjoy this fantasy, she was going to enjoy it to the fullest. Laying back down again, she trailed her fingers up her sides to her now bared breasts.
"Such a responsive little kitten... Awww don't be shy, it's ok. Come closer, rest your head on my chest so I can stroke your hair. There, isn't that better?"
In her imagination, Regina could easily see herself doing exactly that; cuddling close while being adored and not having any concerns. Not having to worry about the town, if Henry was ok, the latest (non-reformed) villain showing up and causing trouble...
"I like having you this close, it means I can reach all of you. All the places my kitten loves to be touched. I can kiss your hair..." The sound is just audible through the laptop speakers. "Tease your cute nipples..." Regina's own had long since been rock-hard from being exposed to the cool air in the bedroom as she lightly rolled them between her fingers, her hips gently moving in search of some friction.
"And best of all, I can reach your favourite place; right here, between your legs."
With her right hand, Regina pushed under the waistband of her panties to confirm the wetness she'd felt soaking the fabric. Squeezing her eyes tightly shut, she bit down hard on her lip to stifle her moan as she touched her exposed clit.
"Yes, you really want to be touched here, don't you kitten? Nodding won't do; you have to say it out loud or I'll stop." The woman's tone had gone from amused, playful, to firm.
Swallowing thickly, Regina knew it wasn't real, knew that this was all a fantasy, as she whispered her reply. "Yes... please."
"Sorry kitten, you need to be louder."
Her orgasm was getting close, so close; fervently rubbing her clit and pinching her nipple with her free hand. She had been a queen, she'd never begged for anything before and she wouldn't beg now, no matter how long it had been since she'd last indulged in pleasuring herself. No, she wouldn't... not even if Emma was asking.
Regina's resolve crumbled as the thoughts of Emma she'd so carefully tried to suppress flew back to the forefront of her mind. "Please!"
"There we go, that wasn't so hard. You're such a good kitten for me." The woman's praise shouldn't have affected her as deeply as it did, but it pushed her closer to the brink. "You make the cutest little noises when you're touched... even more when you're kissed."
Panting hard, Regina could feel the tightening coil of warmth in her lower abdomen. "Sssoo close..." She hissed as she moved her hand faster, imagining warm lips and teeth nipping at her neck.
"Is my kitten enjoying herself, hm? Playing with herself like a slutty kitten?"
Squirming on the bed and frantically moving her tiring hand, Regina's pleas quickly became an increasingly loud chant as she sought her release. "Please... please... pleeeeeease!"
"Cum for me kitten, now!"
The words were enough to push Regina over the edge, dragging a blinding orgasm out of her and leaving her breathless for a long moment. Flopping onto the bed with a soft whimper, she dragged her sticky hand out of her now ruined panties, staring blearily at the ceiling while her heart rate slowed and she got her breath back.
Flashes of Emma, her hair, her eyes, even her red leather jacket that Regina (pretended she) hated so much, shot across Regina's unguarded mind. As much as she might have wanted to deny it, there was just no avoiding the fact that it was Emma she'd pictured in her fantasy. That it was Emma's lap she wanted to be held on, shielded from an uncaring society and a cruel world.
After several minutes of silence, the woman's voice on the recording continued. "Relax for me baby, I'd like you to lay there and just listen to my voice ok? You're not a slut, or a whore. You're not worthless; you are loved and valued. I want you to remember that." Tears welled in Regina's eyes as she turned her head to look at her laptop, the kind words bringing back memories of her father saying the same sort of things.
"I'm so fucking proud of you, baby. When you're ready, turn this clip off and take a nap, maybe shower first if you feel you have the energy. Whatever you feel most comfortable doing."
Rolling onto her side, Regina moved her hand to stop the recording but stilled as she realised it wasn't quite finished.
"I'm here for you, anytime you need me."
It took her a long time to stop the tears, her heart filled with something other than hate, anger or grief over losing so much; losing Daniel, the man she loved, losing her father, the one she loved the most, and almost losing her son. She tried not to think how pathetic she'd become that a stranger's voice filled her heart with a tiny shred of hope.