Fandom: Victorious
Title: Point of View
Chapter 17:
Point of View: Cat Valentine
"The bleeding seems to have stopped, Jade. How are you feeling?" Sitting on the bathroom floor, I stare into her eyes, pulling the bloody towel away.
"Nauseatingly dizzy."
"Jade, maybe you should go to the hospital. Get checked out." Coughing harshly, she shakes her head softly. "No, today is about honoring my mom. Not giving into one of Remi's temper tantrums."
"Jade, what she did to you wasn't a temper tantrum. She assaulted you!"
"I know, Cat, it's my head killing me. I promise if I feel bad afterward, I will get checked out. Right now, I want to keep the focus on my mom and raising money for charity. We have a lot of celebrities coming here to help celebrate. I'm the host. I can't leave. My mom would have stayed and fought through any pain or illness the show must go on, the first rule of show business. Right?" I bite my lower lip and nod.
My stomach spasms sympathetically at the sight of Jade doubling over when a cramp hits her stomach hard, and she heaves, gagging horribly into the toilet bowl.
The acid smell of old coffee and cinnamon crumb cake mixed with rotten fish smashing me in my sinuses, nearly making me gag. I cover my mouth and nose with my blazer forcing myself to go closer to rub her back but keeping my face turned away, so I don't end up next to her vomiting.
Jade's face swells to plum red as she coughs up her lungs and heaves her entire intestines up. Sweat rolls down her neck and back. I'm worried about the lump forming on the side of her head, quickly turning black and purple.
When something tangible impacts the head, it gives a hard jolt to the brain. If the hit is hard enough, it causes the brain to slam around inside the skull and pulls and twists at the brainstem, which regulates consciousness. I know she didn't lose consciousness, but I'm still worried. She could be injured and not feel the effects for a while.
Standing up, reaching for a cup, I fill it with water and kneel again, helping Jade to wipe her mouth and taking the advantage to look into her eyes, checking the size of her pupils. They are equal and reactive. That is a good sign. A slow bleed could be dangerous too late if she's not careful enough to check it out. Handing her the cup, she sips, swishes, and rinses, spitting out the water.
She buries her head between her legs when she's done vomiting, breathing slowly. I keep rubbing small circles around her lower back.
"I can hardly keep my eyes open, Cat. Everything feels so heavy. All I want to do is sleep. I need caffeine; I'm running on fumes."
"I know, Jade; I can see how exhausted you are. I wish you would take a few hours to care for your own needs."
"I can't, Cat; everyone is counting on me today. I have to keep going. You can push me to rest, but you don't get how important today is to me. So I advise you to step back. I push back harder. I promise I'll be alright."
"I know you, Jade. I push back harder for those I love. So, I know you will keep pushing because physical pain feels like emotional relief, but remember one thing, Jade. I think you know me well enough to know I am correct."
"I do, Cat. So. I promise I'll seek help if I feel worse later."
There's a knock on the door a few seconds later. "Be right there," I answer. Jade and I take turns relieving ourselves. Squeezing each other hands after we wash them, we take a deep breath. I'm thankful the bleeding has stopped, and the soreness is only mild now. WE exit the bathroom to see my mom on the other side of the door looking worried.
"Jade, how's the head?"
My mom searches her eyes for any signs of lying or possible injuries. "painful, but I'm ready to get on with the show. Is Remi gone?"
"Jacqui escorted her off the property and gave the police strict instructions not to let her back on, but who knows if she'll stay away. Keep your eyes vigil. Do you need medical help?"
"No. I want to get the night over so I can lay down."
"Okay, let's meet everyone who came to support and honor your mom and Inishmore."
My mom's arms wrap around Jade's shoulders and back as we walk toward the backyard. Caitlin's home sits in one of the largest lots in all of Beverly Ridge Estates, a gated community in the Mulholland Corridor section of Beverly Hills set among the backdrop of lush greenery and mountains. The enclave contains 12 residences that straddle either side of a short meandering road, Beverly Ridge Terrace. Caitlin's was the first home built here, and she customized her home and the 13 acres to look like the rolling hills of Ireland.
One of the most extraordinary views you will ever see in a gated community, this spectacular estate is one of the premier properties in Beverly Ridge; it is approached by a long, gated, private drive to a breathtaking Mediterranean villa warm and contemporary. A stunning backdrop of impressive panoramas of Los Angeles surrounds a gorgeous courtyard. A nearly 3,000-square-foot roof deck sprawls out onto a balcony that spans the entire back side of the house, with double, curving staircases stepping down onto a bluestone terrace, sliding glass doors open up from a third-floor professional sound studio, which has a recording studio with the multi-track soundboard, a piano room, complete with a luxurious listening lounge, which holds an indoor stage the doors slide open leading to the outdoor performance area made from dark grey/ black granite stone Bangalore.
Majestic waterproof RGB wall lights sparkle as the performers move across the 2,000 SF stage, which leads to a 6,000 SF entertainment area with 18' ceilings, a custom bar, commercial-grade catering facilities, and an incredible 23' LED screen that rises at the touch of a button and a 30-person lounge area with firepit. A separate iron-rod spiral stairwell leads to an upgraded sauna and leisure room that leads to the resort-sized saltwater pool and a partially closed-off elegant patio with seating for ten.
It's classy and comfortable and has two fire pits lighted by recessed and pendant lights, along with a built-in BBQ area around a custom fountain. Spread with regal lighting, a commissioned Christopher Guy chandelier, custom Bisazza mosaics, and Porcelanosa-wall tiles, every inch of this mansion has been hand-selected, sparring at no expense.
"Are you ready, Jade?" "No, but it doesn't matter; the show must go on."
Taking her hand, I squeeze it as Jade wraps her arm around Ryan's shoulders. The three of us step outside next to my mom, who takes the microphone to the backyard, starting with the first 3.71 acres after the lounge and pool areas have been gated off by police and wrought iron fences to accustom the thousands of fans who have gathered here today. Five additional '85-inch TV's with Weatherproof TVs boasting a 4K Ultra HD LED display have been set up to let the massive crowds see the performances. A separate gate leads to the exit, so they only come in contact with the actual mansion if they have tickets reserved for the tour.
A hush falls among the crowd as we step out once the glass doors slide open. "I'm nervous, Jade," Ryan mumbles as she pulls him close. "Me too, buddy, but we got this." We join the rest of the members of Inishmore, my aunts Edele, Katie, and Moria: and Jade's aunts Sloane and Beth-Ann.
My mom clears her throat, and instantly all heads turn to pay attention. Cameras roll along the front to capture her light's bright and colorful scroll until they land on us. When I look out to the 30-person lounge, I spot our friends and smile, feeling a little less nervous; they all look in awe sitting among the elite Hollywood Elites. Trina seems ready to pass out. She's seated on her right by Johnny Max Joseph 'JJ', the seventeen-year-old is three times nominated Academy Award-winning actor. He appeared in the 2012 film The Three Stooges and as young Peter Parker in The Amazing Spider-Man and is set to star in a TV Drama.
On Trina's left is sixteen-year-old Levi Zane. In 2016, Miller starred as Luke in the psychological horror Christmas-themed film Lights Out, where film critics highly regarded the young British actor's performance. He played Young Gavroche in the 2020 film adaptation of Les Miserables, where he won best young actor under sixteen. Levi was fourteen in 2020.
"Here's to a long life and a merry one. A quick death and an easy one. A pretty girl and an honest one. A cold pint and another one! These are the last words my best friend, my sister in life, music, and spirit Caitlin Ivy Ryan, ever said to me shortly before she passed away five years ago today. Good evening; thank you, everyone, for coming. My name is Aislin Moore-Valentine. Many of you will know me from Beverly Hills Dynasty; many others may know me as one-seventh of the Irish Girl Group Inishmore. However, you know me, it doesn't matter; what matters is the reason we are all gathered here today."
"The first is to celebrate the anniversary of Inishmore's first single Inish-Breeze, a song none of us ever thought would become the massive hit it did become. The song helped launch our careers worldwide and got seven little dreaming Irish lasses out of Ireland. The second reason is to honor and celebrate the legacy that our sister, our friend Caitlin, left behind. When producers told me they wanted to take this celebration live and asked me to host it along with Caitlin's children, I was left breathless."
"How do you take someone's extensive rich complex of fifty-six years of life and compound it into a speech of three minutes or less without losing the elegance and essence of their lives? It took me more than a few tries and numerous pints, but my emotions improved as soon as I finished writing the perfect eulogy for my sister. My legs were numb, my larynx refused to work, and it felt like I had no strength to move. Five minutes ago, I was almost going to bolt for my car and quietly disappear."
"What stopped me was knowing her children had the guts to come up here today to step foot inside these walls knowing their mother would never walk these halls again except in the ghosts of memories that haunt them every day. If a sixteen-year-old and a fourteen-year-old can stand before you and speak from their hearts, I better get my sixty-one-year-old butt back inside and show up."
"Part of me didn't want to attend this gathering. I still cannot come to terms with the reality that she is gone; in life, her spirit was always so larger than life. To be precise, I am scared to face the world without her hand on my shoulders. Since birth, we were inseparable where Caitlin was; therefore, I was, and vice versa, a fact which I know annoyed her twin sister Beth-Ann more than she ever would care to admit." Beth-Ann whistles low, nodding yes, making everyone chuckle a little.
"When the emotions hit me only a few days ago that I would be up here on stage with all the members of Inishmore, something which hasn't happened in over a decade, I almost lost it because we will never be a whole group in this life not without Caitlin. I wanted to cancel; I wanted to get drunk and scream. Until I heard her voice singing in my ear when destiny calls you, you must be strong. I may not be with you. But you got to hold on. Because I will be with you in your heart. You are never alone. All the world's a stage, and most of us are desperately unrehearsed, but every performer worth their SAG card knows the show must go on rehearsed or unrehearsed. Showing up is what makes a true performer."
"I've had years of experience keeping my façade front and center. Beautiful young people are acts of nature, but beautiful older people are works of art. I am old at sixty-one, but in body and mind, I am as young as that girl who danced across her school's rickey old stage belting out an old Irish folk tale with her six best friends dreaming of fame and money. Some days I swear I can feel Caitlin take my hand backstage when nerves threaten to knock me to my knees. Fear will take you nowhere, Aislin. Love well, that will take you to your wildest dreams, so choose love. Love of singing, love of dancing, love of dreaming. Always choose love."
"Many years have passed since that day; sometimes it feels exactly like every one of those fifty years, 26,280,000 minutes, 1,576,800,000 seconds. On other days I look back on them as if they were yesterday. I can hear her laugh, see her beautiful smile and feel her touch. Caitlin was a force to be reckoned with. And who would know that better than me? She had a strong voice, an aura that you cannot ignore. All of you gathered here today know this even if you have never met her in life- you know her through her films and music. She's touched your life profoundly, or you wouldn't be here today."
"Caitlin knew her way to people's hearts. My children loved Aunt Cait because 'She gives us more chocolates than Mommy .'And I cannot disagree with that. Cait had a sweet tooth and could survive on candies and chocolates for weeks! How she kept her figure always baffled me, and yes, part of me was secretly jealous. She was a bright student with straight A's. Her teachers loved her, and so did the boys. She'd come home with roses and greeting cards on Valentine's Day, while I would sit back and wonder what was wrong with me. Am I too fat or too short? Is Red hair not pretty anymore? What happened to everyone loving the Irish red lass? When did blond become the new Irish? Right ladies?" All the women on stage agree, laughing. "When we asked her how she did it? She would roll her eyes and say who cares? Boys are boring. I'd rather chase a moonbeam. It's warmer."
"It took years for Caitlin to own her sexuality for many reasons; being viewed as a sex symbol may sound intriguing to young girls and boys, but the reality is it leaves a person feeling used and cheap; it left her wondering if people liked her just because they thought she would sleep with them or get them access to the elite crowds. Her distrust of men grew more daily, leaving her feeling unfilled in love and disgusted by sex."
"Hollywood is not America, Aislin; it's what she used to say to me. Referring to the dreams we had growing up in Ireland where we were always told America is the land of opportunities. We came here looking for a thrill and got the rides of our lives, but they came with a price. One none of us realized until it was too late. It was too late when we understood the price we were paying. We had been sucked into the world of champagne, suits, cars, and Hollywood promises of grand illusion; once you are part of the world of the elite, believe me, you don't dare entertain the idea of letting it go for a normal life. So, you play the game, kiss the hands which betray you, and you smile through the pain because, beyond it, the world of pearly gates and Mercedes lets you live like queens and kings."
"Welcome to our lives." My mom twirls, waving her hands towards the magnificent mansion, a work of art that comes to life—with its perfectly manicured park-like grounds, starting with a large glass entryway to one of the most beautiful and abundant homes in the world. A spiral staircase surrounds a stunning 44' chandelier made of 55,000 crystals and is just one of the incredible custom lighting sculptures throughout the home. The mansion is four stories with a tremendous 6-car automated display auto elevator. Fingerprint technology and security command center provide the utmost privacy and safety.
Floor-to-Ceiling windows allow beautiful panoramic views, a spectacular 2-story entry lobby leads to the stunning sunken living room with original hardwood floors, an original fireplace with an ornate mantel, and two sets of doors that open to a covered terrace that serves as an outdoor sitting room. The living room and the foyer have access to a formal dining room with a Palladian window overlooking the backyard. A butler's pantry connects this space to a bright kitchen with a vintage range and room for a breakfast table. A second pantry and a laundry room are off the kitchen. Behind the laundry room is a guest room with an en suite bathroom.
The first floor features a home theater with a damask fabric with Swarovski crystal inlays, a lobby with full-motion movie posters, a balcony, and a main auditorium to seat as many as 45 people. The 18-foot-wide screen offers a 3D projection system. There is a custom Mudejar ceiling with backlit leaded glass, 150 hand-painted panels, and backlit leaded glass. The arches on the back and side walls are framed in wrought iron and hide 28 speakers behind the woven horse-hair fabric. The total cost for the project was around $3.5 million, and it took four years to complete a 17th-century Spanish, Moorish gothic design.
Followed by a two-story Rotunda Library/Office with a secret passage to a two-story museum filled with all of Caitlin's projects, music and film, posters, and memorable along with a history of her life and Irish culture guests who pay a whopping $900 can pick out any movie or music video to watch on the home theater complete with a catered meal. There's also an indoor basketball court, a fully equipped gym, and an exercise studio. Guests can pay to rent them out for parties and events. The first floor is never used for the family since Caitlin's death. It's been used as a showcase for a celebrity home tour.
A newly renovated fitness center with a climbing wall, spa, steam room with backlit Onyx, massage room, a sound-proof cinema, a grand primary suite with hand-crafted Italian floor-to-ceiling oak cladding, a lounge area that can hold twenty-two people with coffee, and mini-bar, two spa-like bathrooms with Calacatta gold marble, 100 SF showers, solid marble vanity, dual showroom-style walk-in closets, and private wraparound balcony with sweeping views, five-person spa, beautifully warm firepit, and 55 inch TV.
The second floor features a custom stone bar that flows into the formal living area with a massive hand-carved stone latticework fireplace. All the furniture was custom-made by the Italian luxury brand: La Contessina.
Retreat into the natural light-filled formal living room with a fireplace and seamless indoor-outdoor living. The third is magical palatial hallways with luxurious marble flooring leading into the living spaces open to oversized stone terraces with alfresco dining, lounging areas, and a fire pit with custom seating. The well-appointed formal dining room on the third floor is idyllic for larger dinner parties, while an informal dining room offers an impeccable space for intimate gatherings. The Chef's kitchen, complete with a sleek palate of marble and stainless steel, features a voluminous island, upgraded appliances, and ample storage. Two generous family rooms offer coffered ceilings, a fireplace, custom lighting, built-in shelving, and a fireplace. The home recording studio is on the third floor, where my friends and I offer to gather when we are recording songs for our school projects.
The fourth-floor houses ten bedrooms, each with its bathroom. Luxury bedrooms should not only exude elegance but create an inviting ambiance. Each of these bedrooms is an example of such elegance and comfort—amazing cityscape views utilizing large glass windows and a private balcony the room that overlooks the sights. Ryan's room has a contemporary style bringing out a modern ambiance. It uses a unique globe glass chandelier, a stylish gas fireplace, white leather lounge chairs, and ottomans. The minimal use of furnishings brings out the elegance of the four-posted bed with white satin sheets and a tufted white headboard. The matching accordion-like side tables are also lovely design choices. A beautiful white and blue pattern was put on the floor carpeting to keep the area looking visually busy and pleasing. The ceiling employs an excellent, recessed lighting scheme on an oval-shaped tray ceiling. The various white shelving and cabinetry also go well with the marble fireplace that brings the whole place together.
Jade's has a sitting area with its enclosure with a matching chrome chandelier and view doors and uses modern white couches, a blue leather ottoman, and a chaise lounge. The sleeping area has a white and blue modern king-sized bed, blue leather ottoman, and entertainment center with a 75-inch flatscreen TV and a state-of-the-art surround sound stereo system and shelving: an expansive walk-in closet, and a separate area with a coffee bar, microwave, and mini refrigerator.
Caitlin's bedroom is nothing short of majestic. She took a page from the Sistine Chapel design book and applied beautiful murals on the ceilings. The pillars around the room have gilded Corinthian capitals and add extra sophistication to the space. Elegant maroon archways serve to segregate the sitting area and sleeping area. The maroon motif is seen in the drapes of the white four-post bed, the English sofa, and the ottoman. The marble floor also adds a nice finishing touch.
"Caitlin knew she has blessed with material possessions, a fact she never forgot, coming from a poor working-class family off the coast of the Irish seaside. She never took it for granted and spent much of her adult years supporting charities she felt truly cared for the people they claimed to represent. Caitlin's favorite charities typically dealt with children because she always believed there's magic in childhood, and it broke her heart to see a child suffering. Especially after she became a mother herself. I'm going to turn the microphone over to oldest child Jasmine Desire West and her nephew Chase Jagger Reagan."
I squeeze Jade's hand as she approaches the mic with her cousin CJ who looks back at his mother, Amanda. She nods and smiles at her son, blowing him a kiss. He catches it and blows one before, a gesture which makes everyone aw and ah.
"Good, Evening everyone. Thank You for coming. My mom always took the time to get the full story and was my biggest and fiercest defender growing up, a lioness of a mother. She never had her vision of who I should be, instead encouraging me to be my person. My mom was the one who held me when I cried or was scared. Her warmth always managed to heal when whatever ailed me; she knew me better than anyone else, even when no one else understood how I thought, felt, or viewed the world. My mom understood and encouraged me. Most of us are not lucky enough to experience a love so unconditional. Without her love and support, I can't imagine what or who I would be today. In my short life, I have experienced more pain and anger than any kid should have in their lifetime."
"Most people in this life don't take the time to see the full picture. They are so used to living in a world of instant gratification the click of a headline becomes the entire story; they don't bother to read the full article because a headline is all they need to know it's true or a snap of a paparazzi picture which leads them to form their own opinions. So many rumors and lies have plagued my mother's life and even more after her death; I can assure you 95% of those rumors are tabloid trash and hold no weight in reality. It's sickening, and as a kid, it frightened me."
"Now I am older, and I get being a celebrity means you are subject to people's opinions which are like assholes; everyone has them, and everyone shits out of them via their butts or mouths. It sucks. Plain and simple. My mom taught me, however, to take them like a grain of salt and toss them out of my view. We had too much to do in this life, too much to be thankful for to give their weight any merit. The first time I remember when my mom took me to volunteer at one of her charities, I was five years old."
"The charity was Los Angeles Children's Hospital, specifically Pediatric oncology. I can remember playing with the children, who were all smiles and laughter as we challenged each other, and celebrity athletes in basketball games, baseball batting challenges, two-legged races, and soccer games while raising money for an amazing cause. At the time, I didn't understand the pain and fear associated with childhood- cancer. I wasn't so lucky a year later."
"I know my mom wanted to do more than pass through this life; she wanted her legacy to state I was here, I made a difference, and my life mattered. It's something so profound, but it's a statement that echoes all our lives. None of us want to exist only to be erased from the whispers of winds as time passes by; even if we don't make award-winning movies or inspire millions of kids to dream big, cure cancer or make NBA history, we all want to know we have touched someone's life, our families, friends, kids, we want to leave something behind which says I was here. I proved you wrong. I wasn't all talk. I might not have declared world peace, but I did something unique. I set the world on fire. To me, my mom's legacy isn't movies or music."
"Sure, they are pretty spectacular, and I want to follow in her footsteps to create masterpieces to inspire kids from abusive homes, kids who are told they will never amount to anything, that they can overcome those words and make their mark crave their names on a piece of history, but to me as cool as that idea is what matters to me what makes me think of my mom in the most beautiful of lights is her acts of kindness. Although my mom was renowned for her style and was closely associated with the fashion world, patronizing and raising the profile of younger designers, she was best known for her charitable work."
"During her life, she was president or patron of over 200 charities. When my mom was a young model in the eighties and nighties, she did a lot of work in nightclubs, especially LGBTQ clubs in New York, San Francisco, London, and Milan. She became close friends with many up-and-coming fashion designers and artists, including drag queens. When the AIDS epidemic hit hard, my mom watched too many of her closest friends die, sometimes slow, painfully deaths isolated and abandoned from families."
"She held their hands and sang to them to make their journey from this life into the next a little less scary. She became angry at the lack of understanding of research and public empathy toward AIDS Victims. So, my mom made it her mission to help AIDS Organizations across the globe. In a time when fear and misinformation ran rampant surrounding the transmission of an illness that was widely associated with gay men, even the simple act of shaking an ill patient's hand was a headline-making moment that helped educate the public on the fact that one couldn't catch the disease that way."
"Throughout the 1980s and 1990s, my mom and fabulous women like Princess Diana used their platforms to bust myths about how HIV/AIDS could be contracted and spend time with people affected by the virus around the world. Davin Hart, the president of the National AIDS Trust, once told me my mom and princess Diana were the foremost ambassadors for AIDS awareness on the planet, and no one could fill their shoes in terms of the work they did; they were like peacocks pretty feathers with worldwide reach too beautiful to shine in this ugly world. Hopelessly naïve thinking they could change the world, foolish enough to dream and crazy enough to try. At least for the time, they were given here on earth. Too short of a time if you ask me; I was twelve when my mom died. I wasn't even born when Princess Diana died, but I see their pictures together, and I can't help but reflect with a sense of entitled pride. Wow, this was my mother. She taught the world how to fly, but she taught me how to love and dream without limits. Like children in the night, every star burns twice as brightly. Every sorrow holds a song; every lost boy belongs. Making history takes courage and a willingness to put yourself out there. I want my legacy to be just as bright as hers. I want my gift to be hope, love, and compassion."
"I know pain, and I know fear. My mom, along with her sense of style, talent, and heart, also passed down a rare hereditary condition called Li-Fraumeni syndrome. LFS increases the risk for a wide spread of tumors to be born with LFS; a person must have a mutated copy of a tp53 gene from an affected parent. There's also a fifty percent of passing the gene down to their children. My mom and aunt Beth carried the mutated gene without knowing it, and because of it, my cousin. CJ and I were both born with the gene."
"This is my story." Jade steps forward to hand CJ the mic and suddenly doubles over in agonizing pain, grabbing her stomach and screaming.