What have I done? I don't recognize the person standing in front of me. The person with a twisted, dead face that can destroy something from across the room. The person that had killed my boyfriend's mother. She used to be a veterinarian and enjoyed it. She had been kind and gentle with a boyfriend she adored. She'd had a normal life and loved it. She missed that life dearly and had wanted it back, but she had to admit she liked the adventure. And that had grown into liking the ability to protect herself. Sure, she'd had her gun but that had done nothing to protect her from Adalind. And she'd never felt more scared and vulnerable when she lost her memories. But, Nick had stayed by her. And she had stayed by him when he lost his powers.
For a brief second, she'd had the chance to get her normal life she missed back. But even then, she knew she'd gone too far to get it back. The monster was already lurking before it'd ever been manifested in full. And when it did, she got to stop being scared of having to be protected. Nick hadn't been able to save her from the Manticore; she had done that herself. Perhaps she shouldn't have hidden it, but look how he had reacted. He couldn't even look at her. She supposed, being honest, she had known it was over the second she had turned. She had mourned it even then. Still, still held out hope that he would come to stand by her as she had once done for him. That they could get through this. Perhaps if he had, had been able to even give her the courtesy of meeting her eyes, or at least say something, anything, that said he didn't hate her because of something she couldn't control. Maybe that would have given her the strength to stay tethered to herself. But she supposed another part of her knew that was a pipe dream. It'd be easy to blame him for it all. Yet, ultimately, she had made her own choice to let it go, loving the power it gave her. A poisoned cup to drink from, perhaps, but she never looked back. Except now she didn't recognize herself. She may have gained power, but in doing so, she'd betrayed everything she stood for and lost everything she'd cared about in the process.
"Do you see what we've done? We've gone and made such fools of ourselves. How did we get here, when I used to know you so well?" - Decode by Paramore