Hiya! I think at least 70% of those reading can agree that The Batman is the best Batman film.
So It's about high time I wrote a fanfic about it!
Get Scrubbing!
Three months after The Riddler's attack on Gotham, Batman was fighting pirates.
I understand how ridiculous that statement might seem to some of you, so let me explain.
When Gotham was flooded, new gangs arose. While Penguin was now the main power, the smaller gangs - like The Skulls - aquired boats and became what the people of Gotham called and the dictionary defines as pirates, attacking and robbing other pirates and supply boats.
Fortunately, Batman's greatest skill is adapting to situations.
With a brand-new 'Batboat' as Alfred has called it (he hated the name. Probably why Alfred insisted of calling it that) Bruce had been patrolling the waters of Gotham as the Government's sewage services and council workers focused on lowering the water and fixing the seawall. Similar to his car, it was near indestructible and had an engine that was also a plane turbine.
As he leapt off the jet-black vessel and onto the Pirates' boat, his communicator beeped.
He pressed on his gauntlet seconds before he blocked a couple hits from an overeager Skull "Not a great time." he grunted, striking back at his face.
"Just called to remind you I want to be brought cake when you pick me up in the morning." came Alfred's voice.
"...You wanted chocolate, right?" asked Bruce, kicking a skull members into another.
"Spot on, Bruce."
With that, Batman cut the transmission and got to work on the rest of the pirates.
...
Five pirate crews later and what looked like an alligator-man sighting later (he should look into that), Bruce changed boats and clothing and arrived at the hospital.
As Alfred's ward walked into Alfred's ward, a doctor quietly thanked him for the charity work he had done. Giving a quick "You're welcome.", Bruce gave a rare smile as Alfred did some basic but not too strenuous stretches.
"Did you bring the cake?" he asked, cheerfully.
Bruce showed him. Turns out it was a fudge. Literally.
...
As they drove home in Bruce's civilian speedboat, the pair passed a couple of imported houseboats, where the occupants cheered at Bruce, who gave them a wave and an awkward smile.
"Never thought I'd see the day." muttered Alfred, taking another bite of his cake "So, how's the 'Famous Philanthropist' thing going?" he asked.
Bruce shrugged "It's doing great."
"Liar."
"It's not doing bad." sighed Bruce "I got the whole 'giving away money' thing nailed down. It's the socialising that's the problem."
"Good thing I'm out of hospital now." Alfred sighed, as if reluctant to ask a question "Got any current cases?"
"I think I saw... never mind." Bruce sighed. The crocodile-man was probably nothing "I'm looking into Tony Zucco. Guy's been taking over the South Side."
Alfred nodded "Makes sense."
As they went by a group of huddled homeless people, Alfred took out a newspaper "I've been reading the paper lately, and next week Haley's Circus is going to visit, which is a good social event for you to be seen at. Apparently, they're halving their prices since morale's been down lately."
"That's putting it lightly."
Alfred stared at him "Did- did you just make a joke?"
"Don't..."
"Call the press corps! Batman makes a joke!" Alfred chuckled.
Bruce sighed "I'm also doing a favour for Gordon tomorrow..."
"Oh?"
"It's about his daughter..."
...
When they arrived at the tower, they kept talking like they hadn't in years as they went up the stairs.
Then Alfred stopped "What. Is. THIS!?"
Bruce looked at the floor, where the mind map on the thousand dollar wood floor still lay.
"I haven't had the time to get rid of it..."
"Now you do! Get scrubbing!"
"But-"
Alfred gave him a look.
Bruce went to go find some paint remover.
...
Wrote this in like... I dunno... half an hour?
Also should I do my own Battinson RObin fic?
Favourite and review!