He was grateful for the nuances of the building that he'd worked in for over half of his university days. He'd already turned in all the keys he'd been responsible for, but the door to the dumpster cage was always open, and the lock for the fence was easy to manage when it was jimmied the right way.

He'd saved his own ass in this same exact way on several occasions, whenever he'd left the keys at home.

So he led Haru through the back of the aquatic center with a confident hand clasped around his and brought him into the main natatorium, which was illuminated enough by the moon through the skylights overhead that the pool shimmered with streaks of silver. The water was so pristinely still that it looked like glass, and he caught himself smiling fondly at the familiar weight of chlorine in the air. He'd never realized how nostalgic that smell was to him.

He glanced at Haru, who was staring at the water with a mystified gaze, and he smiled even wider.

"This is a pool?" Haru asked, voice quiet, eyes glancing at him as though unsure what was allowed here.

Makoto nodded. "Mmhm."

"There are no fish in it."

He chuckled. "Well … no. Most humans don't really like swimming with fish."

"Oh … I can swim here?"

"Yeah." He pinched his lips under a thought. "Though, I should probably warn you, it's not saltwater. There are chemicals in it to keep it clean. It's safe for humans, but … I don't know how it'll effect you."

Haru blinked his eyes at him, but had no comments to give about it. He just stripped down out of his clothes and dove straight in, and Makoto squinted one eye against the residual splash. He crouched down at the edge, watching carefully, but it was difficult, through the ripples on the surface, to see the transformation. Haru's tail was glittering and swishing strongly through the water in no time. He thought it looked a little greener than he'd seen it before, and for a second he was truly concerned about the chemicals and what effect they might have on him, but he didn't come back up to the surface for a good long while, and Makoto assumed that was a good thing.

He wrapped his arms around his legs and propped his chin on his knees, watching as Haru swam so bizarrely like a sea creature that he could not look away, but from the way his tail swept from side to side and fluttered in a happy wag, he imagined that Haru was some kind of relieved — and so he was relieved as well.

He knew Haru had been extremely uncomfortable ever since they'd gotten to Tokyo — ever since they'd gotten to Iwatobi really. The general anxiety of being around humans for him was palpable. Makoto never even needed him to confirm that. Haru didn't know what to do around them, and there were a lot of bodies to maneuver through in Tokyo. Also though, Makoto had noticed that the plane ride had taken a lot out of him, and he'd been a little off ever since.

He felt horribly about it, dragging Haru behind him and forcefully introducing him to all of these things he'd never encountered before, when he was used to living in a secluded cove on a small island — by himself. It must have all been terribly loud, and crowded, and strange to him. And yet, he hadn't spoken a word about it, and Makoto knew he was trying to put on a brave face for him. It both made his heart feel so full it was practically gushing and also squeezed it half to death. He didn't want Haru to suffocate on his account. He'd been trying to think of something to do for him for weeks.

Judging by the way that Haru swam in content circles along the bottom of the deep end, he figured this idea was one of the better ones.

"I love you," he whispered, clenching at the chest of his t-shirt as though that would calm the flutter in his pulse.

Kisumi had said it in the airport, and he had blustered about it, first, because Kisumi was always doing shit like that, and it would forever drive him insane, and second, because he'd been trying to figure out the right moment to say it.

Because he did. He did love Haru. He had fallen in love with him quite fully, and were his life not in shambles, he'd like to think he'd have told him so by now. He still felt horribly about the way he'd treated Haru after he told him the truth about his family, and every time he thought about it, his stomach and chest alike constricted for seven-hundred different reasons.

He ached for his family every day, cried over them every night, longed that whenever he managed to open his eyes they would be there and he would feel whole again, and he was crushed every time that he was forced to remember that they were gone. And sometimes the grief consumed him and everything that he was, but more and more lately he was finding the strength in him to push back against that, because he had Haru with him, and he could see how hard Haru was trying for him, how much he was sacrificing for him, all of the day-to-day terrors he was having to overcome, and he wanted to be more present for him. He wanted to be there with him too — for him too.

He wished Haru had told him about his family as soon as he'd known, but he knew if he'd been in that same position he wouldn't have known how to open his mouth about it either, how to drop an anchor, a continent, an atom bomb on the person that he cared so deeply about — and then to have to stand there and watch all of the hurt gush out … He didn't know how Haru had managed it.

Grateful was too small of a word to describe how he felt. Comforted didn't even begin to scratch the surface. Relieved was child's play.

He loved Haru. That was the closest he could get to describing the feeling.

He blinked when the top of Haru's head popped up out of the water directly below him, rich blue eyes blinking curiously. He kept his nose under the surface. Makoto hadn't even seen him swim back across the pool.

He let out a breath and smiled. "Enjoying yourself?"

"Won't you swim with me?" he asked in return. Though, he didn't lift his chin above the water when he spoke, and the sound that echoed out around his words sent an instant chill down Makoto's spine and his eyes grew wide, heart thumping exactly twice.

There was a beat of a pause before he remembered how to respond.

"What was that?"

This time, Haru did raise his chin above the surface. "What was what?"

"That- … When you spoke underwater, it was like …" He shook his head, eyes turning around the room, trying to find the words. "I-I don't know. I've never heard anything like that before."

Haru didn't answer his question. He just simply blinked at him, and then slowly lowered himself back under. He opened his mouth, and what came out lifted the breath out of Makoto's lungs and suspended it there, just outside of his parted lips.

It was haunting, but also achingly beautiful, like a song with secret chords that no one had ever heard before. It had no melody, it had no words — at least not any that he could understand — but every note filled the room and reverberated back to him a hundred times, climbing on top of each other in perfect harmony.

He forgot everything, where they were, what they were doing, all of the events of the past almost twenty-two years that he'd been alive, even his own name. He sank into Haru's voice and it took it all away, leaving a blissful peace behind that was so enveloping, he wasn't even aware of his body anymore. The only thing he could think was that he needed to get closer, that he needed to reach out and grab that sound if he could, peek at it through cupped hands.

But it stopped.

"Makoto."

He blinked rapidly, realizing only just then that he was perilously leaning so far over the edge of the pool that Haru had to push against his chest to keep him from falling in.

"I … I'm sorry," he said numbly, barely aware of his own voice for a second. He sat back.

"Stop apologizing," Haru said — and Makoto could hear the echoes of it, still there, where it always had been, but he'd never recognized it for what it was until just now.

"Haru … Your voice is beautiful."

"My voice is deadly," he said, giving him a look. "What you just heard is meant to attract prey. I could have drowned you if I wanted to."

Makoto blinked at him a couple of times. "It would have been a very peaceful death."

Haru pursed his lips and rolled his eyes with a small shake of his head, but there was a very faint blush in his cheeks.

Makoto smiled, and leaned over the water again. "Will you do it again?"

"No," he said very sternly. Then after sheepishly dropping his gaze, he added, "But if you swim with me, I'll sing you something else."

Makoto was instantly thrilled by the prospect, so he stood and shed his clothes down to his boxers, then dove into the water, which was a bit chilly for his taste, but bearable enough, and the more he moved around, the more used to it he got. He blinked his eyes open, smiling already as Haru swam up so close to him that their noses nearly touched.

His eyes were also different underwater, though to attempt to explain how would be like trying to describe life before birth from memory. They shone — as though there were whole moving oceans inside of them, and they were just as mesmerizing and alluring as his voice had been.

"Take a breath," Haru said, pointing toward the surface.

His voice was so much clearer underwater, even more so than when he spoke on land. Makoto didn't just hear it in his ears, he felt it in his body, as though it was a part of his very nervous system, and it shook him with more thrilling chills, but he obeyed.

He popped his head up only long enough to take a deep breath, and then he drifted back under, following Haru as he led him in looping circles for a moment, smiling back over his shoulder probably at how eagerly Makoto swam in his wake.

They danced for a bit — that was the best way to describe it. They just swam back and forth in the space they were allotted and weaved around each other. And Haru was for sure a thousand times more graceful than Makoto was underwater, but Makoto felt so freed by Haru's natural movement that he didn't think about it at all. At least not until he had to swim up to the surface for another breath. Rest assured he didn't take long about it, and he was back under again, giddy with warmth when he realized Haru had taken the pause to circle underneath him.

He gave Makoto a smile, and then he took off, swimming so quickly that Makoto completely lost his bearings for a second. But he caught the blur of him swimming in wide circles around him, and then tight circles around him, creating a lazy current that he was able to just drift in, and his giggles came out as pockets of air, bubbling up to the surface. He relaxed back, staring up toward the shimmering moonlight far above his head and let his arms leisurely float out to the sides, keeping him balanced as he let the current carry him around.

And then he heard it again, and his heart stopped in place of exhaling a gasp. It was a different song, a warmer song, and this time he could feel it in his chest, as though it was emanating from there, but it also echoed out all around him, and he let the peace engulf him, let his eyes close.

It didn't create the same enveloping need to get closer to the center of that sound, but what it did do was make everything okay. The world didn't stop, and he was still aware of his body, but it felt like a weight was being lifted off of his chest and he could permit himself to just simply float, to just feel the coolness of the water, and the tickle of the bubbles, and the movement of Haru swimming around him. He knew already that he wanted to stay there forever, and he didn't even feel the need to worry about knowing that he couldn't.

He felt perfectly safe, and protected, held, covered, and mended. He was the very opposite of empty.

Part of him wished he could understand the language and its soft dip in and out of an echoing whisper. But the other part of him already knew, as though the very same song had been sung to him in his sleep as a child. It wasn't the kind of thing to be translated into words, but he just somehow knew that the ballad was an incantation for healing.

And everything slowed down, leaving only his pulse and Haru's song in his ears, while he hovered there weightlessly as the wounds he carried were sewn shut with red thread and careful hands. He wasn't scared, there was no choking anxiety for what the future had to hold, there was just that moment, and it was the same as any moment in his childhood when he'd scratched up his knee or gotten a cut on his finger and his mother would pick him up and cuddle him close and put a bandage on it and kiss it better.

Simple. Effortless.

"My Mako-chan," she would say, adding a kiss to the tip of his nose while she brushed his hair back. "Such a big boy. You are so brave."

He could sense it, when Haru swam closer, humming in his ear just for a moment more, and then his hands gently lifted him up to the surface, and he gasped in a breath, surprised by the tears that instantly left his eyes when he opened them.

He didn't move for a long while, just lay there floating, blinking at the moon.

It was quiet for a very still moment, and then Haru's voice — much more subdued and quiet — asked, "Did that help?"

He nodded and rubbed at his eyes, sniffing. He couldn't say much, so he just hummed a "Mmhm."

"That's ancient stuff," he explained. "Most of my kind are out of practice with it. It's sort of gotten lost over the years. But my grandmother thought it was important to preserve, so she taught it to me. She said we learned it from humpback whales thousands of years ago. Their songs are … ethereal. Listening to them kind of feels like all of your burdens are being lifted."

He nodded again, absently this time.

Another moment of silence rested there comfortably between them, and then Haru sighed.

"I like the pool."

Makoto finally lifted his head, letting his legs drift back underneath him. "I'm glad. I know it's not the sea, but it's the best I could do for now."

"It's perfect," Haru said, his gaze strong. "You're … perfect." His eyes dropped away, voice dying, because he'd apparently not meant to say that. Makoto adored the red staining his cheeks and he reached up to brush a thumb across it.

"You are also perfect, Haru-chan."

Haru blinked, head tilting as he contemplated the honorific, but he didn't say anything about it. "I like swimming with you," he muttered toward the water.

Makoto smiled. "I do too. You're so graceful. Everything about you is so beautiful and freeing, and you keep surprising me. I like —"

Haru pressed a palm to his mouth, hiding under his bangs as best he could, though Makoto could see how bright the blush had already gotten.

"Please stop. That's enough."

He chuckled, then pinched Haru's chin to tilt his head up and met his lips with a kiss.

He tasted like chlorine this time, but that was no surprise. What was though, was how cold his skin was. It wasn't unpleasant — in fact it was the opposite — but it was very very different from kissing him in his human form, and he'd have never thought of a nuance like that. Though it did make more sense now, why he was always so cool to touch.

His toes were just barely grazing the bottom of the pool right now, and he pushed closer to the edge of the shallow end for firmer footing — kissing Haru all the while. He pressed him back against the wall, and let his hand roam his body, amazed by how silky his skin was, and thoroughly fascinated by the scales trimming his waist.

"Can I touch your tail?"

Haru dropped his gaze bashfully when they broke apart. He seemed hesitant about it for just a moment, but eventually lifted his tail up closer to the surface, and Makoto just barely skimmed half the length of it with his fingers.

It was a bit longer than Haru's legs, but perfectly proportionate to his torso even still. It was slippery to the touch, more so than he'd thought it would be, but he could also make out the edges of each scale. They were sharp, but not menacing, about the size of large coins. It was all muscle underneath, and the closest thing he could compare it to was holding a snake — which he'd only ever done once, because Kisumi had goaded him into it somehow, and he had hated that experience, but this was obviously different.

He watched, mesmerized, as Haru's tail swayed across the surface, and then moved around to slip between them and curl around his other side, nudging him in the back to push him closer, and he had to catch himself with his palms on the edge of pool, framing Haru's shoulders.

He chuckled and Haru lifted a tiny smile — though it fell away almost immediately as he gazed deeply into his eyes. His tail felt strong around his waist.

"Makoto."

"Hm?"

"Are you … Do you still find me attractive — like this?"

Makoto blinked, caught off guard by the question, but he smiled and leaned in closer to press their foreheads together. "Of course I do."

"It's not weird to you?"

"It's extremely different," he answered honestly, lifting a hand to stroke at Haru's cheek again. "But I think that's why it's attractive to me. You're so otherworldly. It's stunning."

Haru pinched his lips, wanting to doubt that, but Makoto knew he could hear the sincerity in his tone. He brushed Haru's bottom lip with his thumb.

"Do you still find me attractive?"

Haru nodded. "I always thought that most humans were ugly. But I haven't been able to think that about you."

He laughed. "Well gosh, I'm flattered then."

Haru smiled. He touched Makoto's collarbone and then dragged wet fingers up his neck and drew a line across his jaw, making him shiver and his eyes drift close. Haru pulled him back in the last little bit and they resumed their kissing, and Makoto was very fond of the way that his tail wound tighter around him.

It was interesting — the thought of being attracted to Haru in this way. As endearing and almost silly a question as it was, he thought it also relevant in a way. Like this, their bodies were different, and it was a great part of his fascination with Haru now, but he'd also known that he liked Haru before he found out that he was a being of the sea. He wondered how much of that played into it though — because he was so drawn to the nuances of him, to the things that separated him and differentiated him from everyone else, and he wondered how much of that was related to his mystic nature, and how much of that was just simply adoring Haru as Haru — regardless of what he was made of.

He figured it was probably a mixture, but at the core of it, Haru being Haru was the thing that had caught his attention from the very beginning, and the fact that Haru was drawn to him as well, in spite of his humanness, made it all the more appealing and perfect.

And with or without his tail, Haru's kisses made him blush either way, Haru's touch sent a buzz through his veins, Haru's tangibility and closeness reawakened an excitement in him that he hadn't felt since that last morning of being whole and blissful. And he pressed closer, holding onto Haru tightly, and lost a little bit more air.

Haru's fingers skated frigidly down his back, and he shivered again, everything about him alert and awake and pumping with a steadily growing eagerness. His hips pushed themselves forward, seeking friction, and he only briefly had a fleeting thought about anatomy, wondering how Haru's body worked, but he didn't ask about it in that moment, and nor did Haru explain.

Instead, his tail unwound from around him to slip through his legs and nudge up between his thighs, and the groan that left his throat might have been embarrassing had anyone else been involved, but Haru somehow made him feel more sure of himself, more aware of himself in all the right ways, and so he didn't worry about it. In fact, he leaned into it, and let him know he was grateful with deeper, panting kisses. He let his body move the way it wanted to, rutting up against Haru, hands grabbing at whatever the mermaid equivalent of an ass was.

Firm — is what it was. Touchable, strong, perfect.

His arms were riddled with goosebumps — all of the good sort — but Haru didn't help any by sliding cold fingers down his stomach and into his boxers. His dick was already well on its way to being fully erect, but just a few strokes got it there in an instant, and he didn't know what way there was to swallow Haru whole right there.

Haru's hands were so gentle, but his fingers were dexterous and intentional and he made every touch count, pushing gasps of pleasure out of his chest, most especially when Haru's cool lips started exploring his neck and kissing at the underside of his jaw. He couldn't keep his eyes open, but he also had no desire to.

"Are you shivering because you're cold, or because you're excited?" Haru mumbled, melodious voice buried in his skin.

"Both," he gasped, hugging his back to keep him close. "And I like it, so don't stop."

Haru hummed a beautiful note in response, and only paused long enough to push the boxers down off of his waist, which Makoto kicked away and lost track of. They weren't necessary.

Contact with Haru's tail in this way was very very different — a mesmerizing kind of different, a thrilling kind of different. He couldn't have explained what all was going on sensation-wise, but it was good, and that's all that he truly cared about.

He moaned quietly when Haru's teeth grazed his collarbone, and ran a hand up through the back of his wet hair.

"Ha-Haru …"

"You're going to ask, aren't you?" was Haru's whisper of a response.

Makoto smiled. The way Haru nuzzled his face into his neck, as though trying to escape it, was charming. He scratched gently at his scalp. "I just want to know how to make you feel good too."

"I do feel good," he said, pulling back to meet his gaze.

Makoto struggled to keep his expression in check, trying not to be so obvious about how cute he thought Haru was, and most definitely not how easy it was to be convinced by whatever Haru said.

"You know what I mean."

"Can't it just be about you for now?"

Makoto gaped at him, not sure if he should gasp in horror or laugh. "Absolutely not. Never. I don't want a single bit of this to ever just be about me," he said, taking Haru's hands and kissing his knuckles. He saw the look in Haru's eyes though, and couldn't help but deflate just a little bit.

"I won't force you into anything," he promised, kissing his fingers again. "If you want to just take this back to the apartment, we can do that instead. Or … we don't have to do anything at all. It's up to you."

Haru huffed out a breath, gaze dropping, and he shook his head. "It is not just up to me. Don't be stupid."

He went quiet, and Makoto found himself smiling fondly. He leaned over to press a kiss to his cheek. "I adore every bit of you, just so you know. Even the things I don't know about yet."

Haru tipped his head to the side before looking back up with just his eyes. Makoto perked up another smile and kissed his lips, twice. He hummed a happy chuckle when Haru kissed him back and they hovered like that for a peaceful moment, just kissing — and Makoto hugged him around the waist, holding him close, and Haru cupped his hands around the back of his neck. And he was more than fine with just that, and always would be, but was also grateful when Haru's tail nudged him up between the legs again, making him weak. He bucked up against Haru's scales and decided he very much liked the way that felt.

"It's different," Haru said finally, with a submitting sigh.

Makoto nodded, kissing the corner of his lips. "I'm okay with that."

"Do you know how dolphins mate?"

"That word again."

"It's a yes or no question, Makoto."

"Mmmmm … sort of."

"That's the closest thing I can compare it to."

"Huh."

He scrubbed back through his memory for clues, for details. He knew only vaguely, and only because Nagisa was a bucket of random facts that he spouted out without warning, and he had a particular interest in marine biology. So Makoto knew it had been explained to him at some point, he just wasn't sure how closely he'd been paying attention at the time — apparently, the answer was not much.

Haru read that off of him very quickly and sighed. "I don't think I want to explain it."

"You don't have to." He smirked. "Though, I find it very funny that you were so open about 'mating' in your human form, but are now all of a sudden self-conscious."

"My human form … has never fully felt like a part of me," he admitted quietly. "It's kind of like walking around in a body that's not mine. I'd never felt particularly attached to it, until …"

Makoto tilted his head when the pause stretched on for a while. "Until?"

"Until you," he mumbled.

He felt a warm rosiness reach his cheeks, and his heart skipped a funny beat. "Oh …"

They were quiet for a moment, this time just standing there — or … standing and floating there. And Makoto felt the familiar urge to apologize, but really he was flattered, and he knew "sorry" was not something that Haru wanted to hear.

Quite obviously, he'd never been told that he had a part in connecting someone else to their own body, and he'd never thought that that was something he would hear. He understood that feeling — maybe not in the same context that Haru felt it, but he'd gone through his very long phase of not knowing what to do with his own body, of feeling perpetually awkward, and large, and clumsy, and just generally unaware of what it wanted. Being with Kisumi had helped him figure a lot of that out, but he'd never been able to express that feeling of understanding and oneness with himself.

He would forever be impressed by Haru. That's what he was learning from this.

Haru took his hand and pulled him back down into another kiss. This one was soft and tentative, but just as welcomed as all the others, and Makoto kissed him back gratefully.

It took a moment, and Makoto could feel the hesitation in it, but Haru eventually guided his hand down to his tail, about around where anyone would expect reproductive clues to be. At first when his fingers touched Haru's scales, there was nothing noticeably different about it from the rest of his tail, but then Haru nudged his middle finger, encouraging it to press closer, and it slipped between his scales to find a slit, maybe the length of his palm, and the moment he touched it, Haru tensed.

Makoto did pause, thoroughly surprised, even more so curious, and very much tempted to pull back and look, because he knew he hadn't noticed that before. But he was very aware of how hesitant Haru was still, and he had no desire to make him uncomfortable, so he resumed kissing him and pressed closer, exploring blindly as he ran his finger along that seam and then tentatively pushed inside of it.

A small sound came out of Haru's throat and his body quaked. His breath went short and he clutched at Makoto's waist. Makoto's pulse thrummed in his chest. The kisses were immediately less tentative.

He explored deeper, rubbing at the smooth walls inside, drawing gasps out of Haru's chest.

He'd never been with a woman — really had never had any desire to — but he imagined that this was somewhat akin to that, except, he wasn't really all that far in before he found the tell-tale identifier of what made Haru inherently male. And again, he was surprised, but also very warmed by the way that Haru was reacting to his touch, so he continued touching, and he pressed close to buck up against his tail again.

Haru's fingers dug into his skin, body shivering, and then he ran his hands up Makoto's back to cling to him, scratching at his shoulder blades, and his tail pressed back up between his legs and Makoto groaned, hunger yawning.

They breathed heavily past each other's lips, kisses turning sloppy, both of them quaking with need. And Makoto completely lost track of what Haru's body was doing, but before he realized it, that one little hidden part of him had extended outside of the slit and grown to a size that, again, had Makoto stumped and utterly amazed.

He really was about to pull back so that he could look, but Haru yanked him against his chest before he could do so. His heart was racing.

Makoto chuckled and kissed at his neck, since that was the only part of him he could reach. "Haru, it's okay."

"It doesn't look like yours," Haru said breathlessly.

"I wouldn't expect it to. I literally have it in my hand right now, I'm pretty sure I have a good idea of what it looks like."

Haru buried his nose in his shoulder.

Makoto chuckled again and gave him a gentle stroke. Haru moaned, so he continued, and nipped at his neck just underneath his jaw, forfeiting his curiosity by allowing his eyes to slide close and just continuing to read Haru's body like it was a book written in braille. He let his hips drag forward, rutting up against him naturally, hoping that would communicate to him that he found not a single bit of him off-putting, and that, in fact, it was the exact opposite. Also though, the texture of Haru's tail brushing up against his cock was exhilarating, and he breathed that pleasure into Haru's skin. The end of Haru's tail lifted up behind him to hold him close, wrapping partway around his waist again, and Makoto found the tickle of his fins brushing his stomach quite pleasant.

He felt safe in Haru's hold, lost in his enchantment, eager, vulnerable, willing to be vulnerable. He was aware of Haru's bashfulness, but felt no need to force it away or to try to convince him that everything was okay and he was safe too, because Haru was already showing him that he knew that.

Haru had already shared so much of himself with him. Makoto felt nothing but honored to be let in so close, to be allowed to touch him in this way, pleasure him in this way, share in even more of what made him who he was as a physical, living, breathing entity that trusted him with his deepest secrets.

He didn't know what made he himself so special, why he had so much intimate access to Haru, but he was going to cherish that gift, and he let Haru know that through his touches, through his kisses, through movement. And when they came, it was together, it was in sync, it was quiet but deep, bottomless, whole and encompassing, and they clung to each other, breathing heavily, leaning into the embrace, and allowing it to piece them back together in a fuller way than they had been before.

Haru's secrets went back into hiding, and Makoto didn't need to see. He kissed Haru's neck, kissed Haru's cheek, kissed Haru's lips, and whispered, "Your body is amazing" with a smile.

Haru cushioned his face in his hands and kissed him back. "Thank you, but don't talk about it."

Makoto chuckled and nuzzled their noses together. "Okay. Do you want to swim some more?"

He shook his head. "We can go now."

"Okay."

He gave him one last kiss, then lifted him up onto the pool deck, where he sat patiently with the end of his tail swishing through the water, while Makoto collected his boxers and then climbed out and threw the rest of his clothes on. He grabbed a clean towel out of the bin close by and wrapped Haru snuggly up in it before he picked him up bridal style and carried him over to one of the benches where they sat and waited for him to dry.

They held hands during that time, fingers intertwined, and for an unpressured moment it was quiet, and there was absolutely nothing to hear but their own, nearly-silent breathing.

Then Makoto rolled the inside of his lip between his teeth, kissed the back of Haru's hand and said, "I'm in love with you," as he stared very intentionally out at the glow of the pool.

He could feel Haru's eyes when they turned to look at him, but he couldn't bring himself to meet them, and he couldn't bring himself to wait for a response either.

"I know we're different. I know we were raised differently, taught differently, come from two entirely different worlds and two entirely different histories, but I love you and everything that you are, and everything that you've shared with me. I … The way that we met is complicated, but far from an accident. And … I'm still hurting so badly, but its bearable with you."

He squeezed his hand, head ducking down as the blush crept up to the tops of his ears.

"It's more than bearable with you. That moment that you told me the truth about what happened — I was so sure that was it, that there was never going to be anything that made any of this or losing them okay. But you stayed so close to me that I was never able to truly feel alone, and because of that, there hasn't been a single day that I've had to carry that hurt by myself.

"You came after me when I tried to run away. You sat next to me even when I yelled at you. You cried with me. You helped me get back home, and you're still with me even now. I can't … There's no amount of explaining that I can do to tell you how grateful I am to you — for everything that you've done, everything that you've sacrificed. All I can say is that I love you, and hope that everything else I do is good enough to prove that."

He bit at his lip some more after speaking all of this, after peeling it all off of his chest and laying it out in front of them. It took several heart-pumping seconds of silence, before he was able to finally look at Haru, who was staring at him in full emotion, no longer the visage of passive apathy.

His eyes were incredible to look at.

"Good enough?" he repeated, head shaking. "Makoto, you're —"

He seized, voice cut off by a gasp. Instant pain overwhelmed his features.

"Haru?"

Makoto's heart stopped on the spot. His body faced Haru with alarm, free hand reaching out to try to comfort him, because his other hand was being squeezed in a death grip. Haru's tail thrashed and Makoto could see the agony crawling up his back. When he did breathe, it was with grunts of pain through his teeth.

"Haru, what's wrong? What's wrong? What do I do?"

He began to panic, though he didn't want to show it, and he tried his best not to, but it was very much there. He didn't know what was happening, and his pulse burst back to life with terror when Haru's other hand grabbed the front of his shirt and he threw his face into his shoulder, pulling with a tight grip as though he was just desperately trying to find something to hold onto, something to anchor him.

Makoto scooped him up, pulling him onto his lap and curling his arms securely around him, shaking already, but he tried to make his embrace strong.

"Okay. It's okay, I've got you," he gasped. "I've got you, Haru. You're okay."

A whine of pain escaped Haru's throat, and Makoto's heart broke instantly. He'd never felt more useless in his life, and all he could think to do was hold Haru's body together as he convulsed in his arms.

He knew somehow that throwing him back into the pool was not the thing to do right now, but he also knew somehow that something about the water, or the lack thereof, was the reason for whatever was happening, and he'd suddenly never felt more trapped in his life, being in this towering concrete city, surrounded by nothing but manmade things.

It took only a handful of seconds, but it felt like years to him. The terror was burning in his eyes by the time Haru finally gasped a huge breath and went still, body trembling with exhaustion, and probably some kind of shock. Makoto pulled back only far enough to place a hand on his cheek and examine his face, completely shaken himself.

"Hey. Are you okay?" he breathed. "Haru?" He tapped on him urgently, because Haru was struggling to open his eyes and his breathing was much too quick and much too short. "Haru!"

He nodded faintly, and breathed out a weak, "Fine. I'm fine."

Makoto shook his head, throat clogged, and shifted him up in his arms. "You are not. What just happened? Do you need a hospital?"

"No," he gasped, eyes finally cracking open, and he immediately tried to pull himself the rest of the way up. "No. I'm fine. It's my legs … It's just my legs."

He looked over to find that Haru's legs had returned and were draped over his thigh where his tail had previously been thrashing about. Visibly, everything looked okay. Nothing appeared to be wrong, but he knew that it was. He knew that it was, because he'd seen Haru transform back into his human form, and that was not how it was supposed to go.

This did nothing but unsettle him even more, and he looked back to Haru, who was gathering back the strength of his breathing and sitting up on his own now.

"What was that? That's not supposed to happen."

Haru pulled in several leveling breaths and held his own arms, trying to contain the shakes. "I told you it hurts."

"But why did that take so much longer than before? It's not supposed to take that long. You said it's always over in a second. Haru —"

"Makoto, it's okay. I promise." He was forcing his voice to come out strong, and he placed a hand on Makoto's chest to stand, as though trying to prove it, but his knees very clearly did not want to hold him up and Makoto was catching him and pulling him back down to sit, before he could truly even lose his balance.

"Please stop. Don't lie to me like that. I don't need you to hide things from me so that I won't worry. Clearly I'm worried, Haru. It's already happening. Just tell me what needs to happen so that we can fix it."

"It's okay," he said again, this time meeting his gaze with vigor. "It's been taking longer for my legs to come back since we got here, but it's not a big deal. I promise. I'm just … It's just stress."

There was a waver in his voice when he said it, and Makoto was reluctant to believe that excuse, but Haru's gaze was steady about it.

"It's just stress," he said again. "I've been worried about you, and there are so many people here, and everything is new and overwhelming, but I'm okay. I promise. There's nothing you need to do to fix anything. I'll be okay. I just need to calm down about it … Okay?"

His hands automatically brushed up and down Haru's body, one hand searching his back, the other his leg, both with anxiously clenching fingers. Haru's gaze was resolute and pleading, and Makoto was too soft toward him to argue with it, but something about that didn't feel right at all. Half of him said that it made sense, reminded him that he didn't know or understand everything about Haru's body and the way that it worked, and so how could he possibly argue and insist that something was wrong beyond what he was saying? But the other half of him, the instinctual half that he knew he'd inherited from his mother — that just tended to know without having to be told that things were wrong, things were off, something was not right — it just knew.

He didn't know how to respond, and maybe he was too shaken to do so just yet, maybe he himself just needed to calm down, but if that was the case then it was going to take a while. It was difficult to let it go, and he knew he truly wouldn't, not all the way, but he nodded.

"Okay," he said, gaze unblinking. "But you'll tell me if something is wrong, right?"

The hesitation was truly so quick he very nearly didn't catch it, but it was there, and Haru nodded. "Of course I will." And that was a bold-faced lie, but Makoto did not say anything about it. He stood.

"Stay right there. I'll get your clothes."

Haru's shoulders deflated, but he didn't move, and Makoto gathered his clothes up and helped him get back into them, even though he said that was unnecessary. Makoto still didn't believe him, and he wasn't about to have him get up just to flop over onto the pool deck, so he pulled him up onto his back, and Haru complained, but he told him to hush.

"Let me carry you back. It's the only thing that I can do."

Haru sighed and went quiet about it. He laid his cheek on his shoulder and conceded.

A/N: For a reference on Haru's healing song, look up "Cave of the Merman" by Kenneth Elan on YouTube. It's something along the lines of what I imagine it sounds like, and is what I listen to whenever I want to get back into the headspace for this universe.