So sorry I didn't post any new chapters last week. I had to put my dog to sleep and I wasn't able to do much of anything last weekend. So, to make up for it, I'm posting SIX chapters today, instead of my normal three. (Chapters 16 - 21) Enjoy!
Zuko
I didn't sleep overnight. I laid all night thinking about yesterday. My sentence to the sisters and to Azula. The fight Sam and I had. The words exchanged between us. Her telling me that I am just like my father. I know she didn't mean it but…was she right? Was I being a tyrant to those girls? I decided to get up and go outside to train. I need to do something. I knew we had been training together, but I decided to do it alone today and let her sleep. I needed to think.
I got dressed and went to the training yard. My guards appeared to have been there for a while training. They awkwardly glanced at me and I wondered how much of our fight had they heard. I also wondered if they thought I was being unfair to the sisters. And to Azula. I wasn't sure. Then I heard someone approach me from behind and I turned, ready to defend myself.
"Woah! Easy there, Buddy!" It was Sokka. I was surprised to see him. He had never joined me in my training yard. He wasn't a bender but he was great at fighting with his sword.
"Sokka! I didn't realize you were there. Is everything ok?"
"Yes, everything is fine. I just…well…I wanted to talk to you. You care to spar?" He asked, drawing his sword. I grinned and walked over to get my swords. It'd been a while since I sparred with someone using my swords so I welcomed the change. We sparred together for a while, neither of us talking. He had gotten quite good in the years since I had dueled him before. He actually could hold his own against me when before I owned him. We stopped to catch our breath and take a break, wiping the sweat off of our faces and necks with our towels.
"So, are you and Sam ok?" Sokka asked.
"You heard our fight." It wasn't a question.
"I'm pretty sure the Earth Kingdom heard it, Buddy." Sokka said trying to lift the mood.
"Yes, we made up." I said simply.
"Well, THAT I think the Earth Kingdom heard too." Sokka said with a grin. I blushed. Had we been that loud? "So then why are you out here without her?"
"I needed some time to train without her. I needed to think."
"About what?"
"About Azula. About the sisters. About my verdict."
"Are you having doubts?" Sokka asked.
"I think so. What do you think? Do you think I am not being fair?" I genuinely wanted to know.
"You mean because you threw the sisters away for life and let Azula off scott free for the same crime?" Sokka asked dryly. I flinched.
"Well, when you say it like that…"
"When I say it like what? Isn't that what happened?"
"Yeah. I suppose it is." I was starting to see Sam's point even more clearly. "You think I should re-sentence them."
"I think that you should listen to Sam. She has a good head on her shoulders. She is smart and fair. I think that because this involves your sister, being unbiased is kind of impossible. For you. But Sam can give you a perspective that you yourself don't have. I think at the very least you need to listen to her." Sokka said. His eyes were kind, not judgemental. He knew my history with Azula. He remembered when I gave her so many chances when searching for Mother and he didn't think it fair then either. It wasn't. I selfishly put my friends in harm's way for her.
"Thanks, Sokka. You're a good friend."
"Think nothing of it, Pal." he said, patting my back.
"Zuko. See you at lunch?"
I looked at the sky and saw it was near noon, "eh. Maybe dinner." I said sheepishly. He smiled, nodded and left the training yard and back to our room. I saw Sam still lying in bed sleeping. The fight yesterday, and our amends, must have exhausted her. I cleaned up and changed into my lounging clothes. Climbed back into bed with her as she returned to her favorite position. I wanted her to sleep. But I wanted to be here when she woke.
We needed to talk.
Sam
I woke up. I wasn't sure what time it was but when I looked out the window, it looked bright enough to be around noon although I couldn't be sure without seeing the sun. I saw that Zuko was with me which I thought was odd. I looked up at him and he was staring at the ceiling, deep in thought. He didn't seem to notice I was awake.
"Where are you, my love?"
Zuko looked down at me returning from his trance. "Hm?"
"You're somewhere else. Not here with me." I said.
"Oh, just thinking."
"About?" I asked playing with his chest hair.
"Yesterday," I cringed. I really didn't want to remember it.
"Oh." I said simply.
He chuckled, "no not about that. About…" he trailed off again.
"About?"
"Tell me what you think." I knew what he meant but I asked anyway.
"What I think about what?"
"The sisters. Azula. All of it. You said you didn't think my sentence fair. Talk to me."
I cringed. I realized that he was asking me but I was afraid it would start another fight. I said as much.
"You won't. I genuinely want to know. I should have asked you yesterday before I moved forward with my decision. I'm just…not used to having a partner anymore."
I was hesitant but asked "Where do you want me to start?"
"The sisters. You said you didn't think they should go to prison. Why?"
"Well, I do think they should be in prison in some capacity, but I disagree with your sentence. For the same reason you didn't put Azula in prison." I said ironically.
"But, I thought you wanted Azula in prison?"
"Well, like I said in some capacity. But I think they need help. All of them. Not just Azula. And I think I can help them."
Zuko raised his eyebrows. "Explain please." he said. He wasn't being authoritarian again. He wanted to understand. I sat up on the bed, and sat cross-legged, facing Zuko. He slid up and propped his back against the headboard.
"I'm not sure that you will totally like it."
"Tell me anyway. Please. I won't get angry. I promise." Well, that was something that was on my mind. I never wanted to be on the receiving end of his anger again. He was intimidating when he was angry, although I didn't show it.
"Ok." I said, preparing myself. "Do you remember what I told you I did before coming to the Bending Nations and Ba Sing Se?"
He was surprised by this question. This wasn't the direction he expected this to go. "Yes. A Psy…." He trailed off, not remembering what it was called.
"A psychologist."
"Yes, that's it. What about it?"
"So, where I come from, we handle people like the sisters and Azula differently. Although they are still held accountable for their crimes, they are also given help. And in some cases with the intention of them being reintegrated into society."
His brow furrowed in interest, "Oh? What kind of help?"
"The kind of help Azula and the sisters need. Before coming to the Bending Nations, I used to do this."
"Hm. Ok." His responses were short but he was listening.
"People, like me, help people like Azula and the sisters. They help them work through their issues to find an inner peace and healing. I don't know the sisters' past but Azula has suffered through a lot of abuse at the hands of your father. And her mental health is impaired."
"So…you help people work through trauma?"
"Precisely." I said, glad he was following me.
"And you think I should get them help like what you did? And send them where? To the asylum?"
"No! No, not the asylum." I said quickly.
"So what then?" he asked, his interest still piqued. I hesitated. Zuko had made it clear this was his duty and his duty alone. I wasn't sure I was totally comfortable speaking so freely about it after yesterday. Zuko noticed my hesitation. He took my hand into his and kissed my fingers.
"Sam, I promise, I won't get upset. I'm so sorry I did yesterday. I shouldn't have proceeded without talking to you. You can give me insight that I don't have. You are here to help me keep a level head. Please, Sam. I want you to tell me exactly what you think I should do." I could tell he meant it. I saw the genuineness in his eyes.
"Well, I think that all three should go to a prison but a low security one. Azula still in a Chi-blocking cell. I could work with them and they would be reevaluated every so often. Every year, two years, 5 years, however many you decide. If they are deemed able to be released, then they would at that time but as a mentally healthy individual who is able to function in society. Or at least as healthy as they can be. I also don't think you should separate the sisters like you did. They are clearly co-dependent on each other. And even though I could help them to learn to lead separate lives, tearing them away from each other like that will be detrimental to them and they probably won't be able to come back from it."
"Hm. That does sound reasonable. They would get the help they need while also paying for their crime."
"Precisely. It isn't their fault their mental state is where it is. They are kind of victims too. Including Azula."
"I guess…I never thought of it that way before. But you're right. They are. You would be willing to work with them? I think it would be dangerous. I would want someone with you at all times."
"No, I would have to be alone with them. You can post a guard outside the door if you must. But what they tell me stays strictly confidential unless I feel the need to act on it."
"I would want to know their progress, Sam."
"And I could tell you generally how they are doing. But as a psychologist I took an oath to protect their information. If they think I'm going to tell someone what they say, they won't open up. Especially Azula."
"Ok. I'm warming up to this, although I still don't like you being alone in the room with them."
"We can take precautions if that makes you feel better. And Azula with the chi-blocking cuffs would do fine also. I think, if nothing else, we should at least try it. Then it would still be fair to all of them and they all would get the help they need."
"Ok. You gave me a lot to think about. I'm probably going to have to sleep on it." Zuko said.
His brow furrowed and I could tell me wanted to ask me something.
"What is it?"
"Well, during our argument yesterday. You said something and I don't know what it means. Fucking. What is that word? I never heard it before and since you have only said it when you were angry, I'm guessing it isn't a very nice word." Zuko asked me, blushing.
I laughed at his question despite trying not to. I couldn't help it. He was so innocent to the things I've seen and lived outside the bending nations. "Well, it's…what we do in bed…together." I looked at him from beneath my eyelashes. His eyes lit up with understanding.
"Oh, I thought it might be…something like that." he chuckled. "I like that activity." I laughed again.
"Yes, I do too and I look forward to doing it again. In the meantime, we should probably get up and visit with our friends before they leave."
"Yes, you're right. We can't stay in here forever. Although I wish we could."
"That makes two of us." I said smiling. We got up and we headed out to find our friends.
