Chapter 3: Deck the Halls

After a quick lunch of vegetable soup, Nathan pulled a few boxes of ornaments and Christmas decorations out of the attic. Jack and Allie swarmed the boxes carefully handling the ribbons, ornaments, and bells that were wrapped from Christmases past. Each item was laid gently on the small table in the living room.

Descending the stairs, Elizabeth held close to her chest a stack of postal packages coming from three separate locations and set them quietly on the table. With this being their first official Christmas together as a family, Nathan and Elizabeth had requested some outside help to represent their family well.

Catching Elizabeth's eye, Nathan cleared his throat which rapidly gained both kids' attention. "Allie…Jack? Your mother and I talked a few weeks back and we thought that this Christmas was a great time to celebrate all being one big family now. It's our first Grant family Christmas, but we also didn't want to lose sight that it's still a Thornton and even Thatcher family Christmas too. Your mom and I wanted our tree to be Grant and Thornton and Thatcher so we asked each of the grandmothers to send us something we can celebrate with. Do you want to see what they sent us?"

"Yeaaaaaaahh!" Jack jumped with anticipation his hands shaking with excitement.

Elizabeth handed the box from Aberdeen to Jack, the box from Airdrie to Allie, and kept the box from Hamilton for her and Nathan to open together. She sat next to him on the settee as the kids sat cross-legged on the rug.

Being the youngest, Jack opened first tossing the handwritten note just inside the box to the side as he rifled through the packing newspaper in search of the treasured items. His hand felt a small wrapped bundle and pulled it out. Pulling back the paper, Jack revealed a simply painted wooden ornament shaped like an angel.

As Jack continued to unwrap angel ornaments, Allie picked up the discarded paper and read:

"Dear Elizabeth and Nathan,

What a wonderful idea! Thank you for including the Thornton family in your Christmas celebration. Jack would be so proud of you, Elizabeth (and I hope you know that I am too!) Nathan, I am so touched at how you continue to honor Jack's memory. You are a remarkable man and I am glad to call you family.

I have included these angel ornaments that I have had for many years on my tree. I started buying them each year in my grief after Tom Senior died as a way to keep his memory alive and have him with us in a way at Christmas. (Don't worry I still kept several for myself!) I hope these angels are a gift to you too as you remember Jack. The angel with the horn was always Jack's favorite as a young boy and I thought that your Jack might like to have it.

I hope to see you soon.

Charlotte"

Elizabeth's eyes brimmed with tears as she soaked in her mother-in-law's words. She had not made specific requests from

any of the mothers—wanting each one to have the freedom to decide what they would like to contribute to the tree. What she had not anticipated, was how truly sentimental and special these gifts already were to her.

Allie held her box patiently in her lap. Getting a nod from her mother, she delicately opened the Grant family box. Rather than find newspaper, the box bulged out with cream knitted fabric. Unsure of where to start, Allie started pulling as more and more knitted fabric spilled out revealing an intricately knit triangle lace pattern along the edging.

"I think it's a blanket…no wait…it's a tree skirt! Grandma knitted us a tree skirt. Oh it's pretty! Do you like it Mom?"

Elizabeth nodded and squeezed Nathan's hand. Nathan's mother, Ada, had been struggling with arthritis the last few years and so this knitted tree skirt was truly a labor of love and had likely taken her a few weeks to complete.

Allie discovered the note at the bottom of the box and raised it to read aloud.

"Dear Nathan and Elizabeth,

I think this is a beautiful thing you are doing for the children. I don't have much from Nathan's childhood, but I have always had a fondness for knitting. It's a good thing that I did too with how quickly Nate was always growing out of his hats and gloves as a child. It felt like I knitted all winter long to keep him warm! I hope that this tree skirt is a blessing to you. The cream color felt timeless and it was the yarn that I had the most of. I hope you like the triangle pattern. It seemed symbolic that your family is really three families in one: Thatcher, Thornton, and Grant and went well with your plans for the tree.

I hope that this letter finds you all well. Archie and I look forward to your next call. Please hug the children for us.

With Love,

Ada & Archie Grant

Allie handed the note to her father as she brought the tree skirt to her mother for closer inspection.

"Oh Nathan, this is just beautiful. I didn't expect your mother to go through all of this trouble…" Elizabeth turned to her husband dewy eyed as she fingered the softly knitted skirt.

"Knowing Mom, it brought her a lot of joy to have a project. She has always loved knitting, and her doctor actually recommended it as an activity that she can do from her chair. It's her way of loving us despite the distance. It's hard for her to travel this time of year." Nathan took Elizabeth's free hand and squeezed it reassuringly.

She smiled back at him, "Well, we'll have to plan on them coming and staying with us this spring for a few weeks then."

"Lizbeth, my mother will have my father on a train at first thaw to get to her new grand baby. You won't be able to stop her, Love." He tipped his chin and narrowed his eyes at her playfully.

Elizabeth laughed to herself with a sudden sadness in her eyes. She set the tree skirt down, and cradled her stomach—anticipating holding this little one well before spring. Nathan gently sought out her hand again on her stomach interlocking their fingers allowing their hands to rest snugly over their baby. Their touch was rewarded with a distinctive thump under their palms from the babe within. Their eyes locked in wonder at the evidence of the life they had created.

"Is the baby moving?" Allie asked curiously—reading her parents' expressions. "Can I feel it?" She approached the settee carefully.

"Of course Sweetheart. Put your hand here." Elizabeth took her hand and placed it near where the last kick was.

Allie waited. Her eyes were filled with anticipation. A minute ticked by with no new movement. "Oh. I can't feel anything." Her head dipped in disappointment though her hand remained.

"I'm sorry Allie…I can't always tell when the baby will kick. Babies don't always cooperate…it's like they have a mind of their own or something." She said with a compassionate wink.

Nathan sympathized with his daughter who so wanted to feel her sibling. "It seems like this baby is more active at night…"

"I felt that! Whoa that was a big one. Keep talking Dad!" Allie's whole face was lit up as she held her hand firmly against Elizabeth's stomach.

"Uh…ok. Uh…" Nathan fumbled for words now being put on the spot.

"Dad! Seriously?" Allie cocked her head to the side and rolled her eyes.

Nathan laughed to himself and shrugged his shoulders. "What?"

Jack wandered over to the settee as well hopeful to also feel the baby just like his big sister.

"Hi baaaaaayyybeee! I wuv you! Kick Jack. Iss okaaay. I heeeere." He held his hand on his mother with his face close to his mother's stomach as if having a perfectly normal intimate conversation big brother to baby.

It worked.

The baby within thumped under Jack and Allie's hands much to their delight. "The baby likes it, Jack, keep talking!" Allie encouraged.

"Hi Bruver! Hi Buddy!" The kids giggled to themselves as their parents shook their heads at the sibling bond already forming before their eyes.

As the kicks slowed again and the sibling game lost its luster, all eyes returned to Elizabeth in anticipation of the last package from Hamilton. Nathan picked up the package that had made its way to the floor.

"Here Love, open it." Nathan handed the box to his bride.

Elizabeth gently opened the box curious about the contents inside and the direction her mother would have taken. Removing the top paper, rows upon rows of shiny golden beads alternating between some large elongated beads and multiple smaller ones tied in several long garlands. Although Elizabeth tried, she had no recollection of these beads at all. In fact, they looked new.

"Wow." Allie lifted one of the garlands gently. "were these yours?"

Elizabeth shrugged. "I don't think I've ever seen these before. I wonder if there's a note….here." Elizabeth pulled the paper with delicately scrolled handwriting that she recognized as her mother's.

Dear Elizabeth and Nathan,

This is a very sweet gesture to include us for your tree. As you know, Elizabeth, I don't hold onto things for long so I decided that the best way to represent the Thatchers was with a touch of gold color to your tree.

This beaded garland is setting the trend this season in all the Society homes (I know that it might not matter to you, but it made me want you to have it).

I hope that its beauty not only reminds you of all that we tried to give you as a child…but that it also signifies how precious you are to us. I know we have had a funny way of showing it, especially in your early years in Coal Valley.

We are grateful that you have included us in this new season of your life with your expanding family, but most of all we are grateful for your forgiveness. I hope you know how much we love you all and wish to be with you.

Love,

Mother and Father/

Grandmum and Grandpa Thatcher

PS- Your father wanted to send a train set to surround the tree, but that was something we wanted to respectfully run past you and Nathan first. Maybe next year?

"Train?!" Jack exclaimed looking at the box.

"Not yet Buddy, but Grandpa Thatcher is working on it," Nathan consoled. He looked sympathetically at his wife. "They're trying, Love. She's trying to connect with you." He sought out her hand as she stared expressionless through the paper in her hand—her mind caught in a distant memory.

After a moment, her eyes fluttered and Elizabeth recognized her husband's reassuring squeeze. "You're right. I know you're right. She put thought into this gift. I don't know what I was expecting honestly."

"Is something wrong?" Allie looked between her parents trying to discern what they were alluding to.

"No." They both said quickly in unison…too quickly.

"Okaaaaay." Allie said narrowing her eyes in disbelief.

"I'm sorry Allie. I'm just not sure what I think yet," Elizabeth answered her teen honestly. "I think these garlands are beautiful and they're very Thatcher-like which is exactly what I had asked for. I'm glad that she sent something. Sometimes….well…I'll just say that it's hard to see your parents differently than when you were a child. Your dad is right. She is trying. I'm just working through a lot still in trying to understand my mother."

Allie smiled sympathetically, stood silently, and hugged her mother. They had come a long way in their mother and daughter relationship and Allie recognized Elizabeth's efforts to always be honest with her wherever she could. Elizabeth's continued efforts helped rebuild trust between the two and Allie was content tonight with the information Elizabeth had offered even if it wasn't the whole story yet. She wasn't being shut out anymore.

Elizabeth melted into her hug—grateful for her daughter's maturity and support. After a moment, she whispered into Allie's ear, "how about we surprise the boys with cocoa?"

Allie squeezed harder and whispered back, "let's do it!"

Nathan looked up curiously as his wife and daughter walked off to the kitchen hand in hand. He wasn't sure what just happened, but he was glad that it did. They returned a few minutes later with steaming mugs of hot cocoa and smiles.

Handing the boys their mugs, Allie took a sip of her cocoa and then started the tree decorating strategy discussion. "Ok so Dad, if you can get the garland at the top, Jack can get the ornaments at the bottom, and I can do the middle. Mom, you've got the ornaments at the top…"

Elizabeth glanced at Nathan catching the same smolder in his eyes.

"Are you two even listening?…Jack, just leave the red cardinal ornament for them. They get weird." She stifled a smirk as she rolled her eyes. Jack seemed to ponder her comment, but blindly agreed in allegiance to his sister.

Nathan winked at his bride over the children's heads causing Elizabeth to blush. It had become a tradition of sorts that apparently at least Allie had caught on to. Never again would they waste the opportunity the cardinal presented for Nathan to hold Elizabeth in his arms close to the tree. The bird had become sacred to them—filled with Christmas magic like their own personalized mistletoe.

Divvying up the ornaments, Nathan started unraveling the gold garland that was wound tightly around the department store cardboard that read "Simpsons est 1858" in white printed lettering.

Starting at the top of the tree, he wound the garland around and around occasionally brushing past his wife who seemed to be regularly just under his arm. It took two or three passes before he caught on that it was no coincidence. She had grabbed a suspender on his pass around the back of the tree that had spun him around and pulled him close. She quickly laid a kiss that left him breathless with the taste of cocoa still on her lips.

"Don't forget the bird, Constable." She whispered huskily into his ear snapping his suspender back in place. She sauntered off around the tree in search of her next ornament while Nathan stood rooted to the floor rubbing his lightly stubbled chin—trying to pull himself together again.

His ears were still tingling and his heart still racing as he picked up the pace on the bottom half of the tree with increased motivation. Allie and Jack were delighted at his sudden speed and none-the-wiser to the encouragement given behind the tree. They stood at the ready now with finished mugs—their ornaments prepared with hooks and ribbons.

Jack hung all of his angel ornaments in a tight cluster that left Elizabeth biting back the suggestion that she was wanting to make about looking for a more symmetrical and balanced ornament style. Upon closer inspection, Jack Senior's favorite angel ornament with the horn hung in the center with the other angels rallying around it like a commander with his angelic fleet.

She could see why the angel would be both of her Jacks' favorite. The other angels either had a more pudgy cherub-like appearance or a more formal look to them with predominantly feminine features. Jack's angel, however, had what looked like a battle horn in it's hand and brushstrokes that indicated a golden breastplate like a warrior would wear.

Each of the angels had their own unique look and style to them. Elizabeth smiled remembering Charlotte's comment that she had purchased the angels one at a time over the years in her grief. It had made quite the eclectic, but beautiful collection.

Rather than the average toddler haphazard decorating style, Elizabeth could see the thought and care that Jack had put into his little hanging vignette. She was grateful that she had chosen to say nothing or she might have missed his little tribute to his father for the sake of overall visual balance.

Allie, with her inherited artist's eye, had beautifully decorated the middle of the tree alternating colored round ornaments with bells and even tying ribbons on branches in bare spaces.

Nathan tucked in the last of the gold garland on the bottom branches of the tree. He made a beeline for the cardinal while haphazardly tossing the cardboard layer back into the postal box. Seeing her motivated husband, Elizabeth let slip a giggle and ducked behind the branches of the tree.

"C'mon Jack…let's go get more cocoa." Allie took Jack's hand leading him towards the kitchen. "Do you want extra chocolate? They're not going to stop us…" she asked as they disappeared into the kitchen.

With a smile, Nathan delivered their cardinal ornament to his bride's outstretched hand. With a blush and a smirk, she turned standing on tiptoe not quite able to reach the top branches just as he had anticipated. Per tradition, he came up right behind her taking the bird from her hand and hanging it on its proper branch.

Unlike their first cardinal moment, Elizabeth purposefully backed into Nathan sinking deeply into his embrace. She soaked up the moment as his arm slid around her hip and under their child. His warm breath just over her ear.

"Merry Christmas Mrs. Grant," he whispered into her ear sending tingling down her spine. She blindly reached a hand up to his stubbled cheek and turned slowly around to face him.

"I should have done this then…" she started before his lips captured hers. She slid her fingers into his hair at the nape of his neck. His arm sliding from the small of her back to behind her shoulders pulling her as close as their baby allowed. Nathan started kissing a trail from her jawline down her neck when overly loud footsteps could be heard coming from the direction of the kitchen.

"We both took two marshmallows and more cocoa…" Allie announced projecting her voice. "We're coming baaaaack."

"Yeah. Baaaaack!" Jack imitated sporting a chocolate stained mustache.

Elizabeth flushed red as she smoothed Nathan's hair. "Later." She whispered to him with her eyes full of promise. She turned again with a wink.

Nathan cleared his throat awkwardly and pretended to inspect the garland.

It fooled no one.

With the tree properly trimmed, Nathan, Elizabeth, and Allie started organizing the table while Jack picked up stray fir needles that dusted the floor.

Elizabeth picked up the discarded garland cardboard from earlier. When she went to nestle it back properly in the postal box, she noticed the corner of a piece of paper sticking up behind the last string of extra garland that they hadn't needed for this tree. Curious, Elizabeth tugged the paper free and found a handwritten note from her beloved family butler.

Dearest Elizabeth,

Your mother shared with me your plans for your family tree and I think it is a wonderful idea. Your mother thought for awhile about what to do and settled on these beads. She hoped to please you, but out of concern for you I secretly wrote this letter.

The staff and I miss you dearly, but please know that we are so proud of you and the family that you are building. You are blossoming out West and we wish you the very best even if we do hope that you will come visit us.

I spoke with Marguerite and she included your favorite sugar cookie recipe that you used to make together when you would sneak into the kitchen as a girl. It's on the back of this card. Please know that we think of you often, and we hope that this will bring you a little taste of home even across the miles. Please give Nathan and the children our best.

Merry Christmas Elizabeth. We love you.

Secretly,

Theodore (and Marguerite)

Elizabeth soundlessly clutched the note to her chest a watery smile gracing her lips.

"What is it, Mom?" Allie asked as she put her hand on her mother's arm. Elizabeth turned to her daughter wondering how much she should share. She glanced up at Nathan and he read her unasked question. He nodded to her to continue as Jack returned to the table curiously. Elizabeth took a deep breath as her mind turned to scenes from her childhood time in the kitchen with Marguerite.

"This note was hidden under the last strand of garland. It's from my butler Mr. Theodore and Miss Cookie, Jack. Do you remember them from the wedding?" She asked her son still amused at the misnomer from her introduction as 'Mama's cook Miss Marguerite.' 'Miss Cookie' was all he could manage and Marguerite was so charmed she refused to let anyone correct him.

Jack nodded—warmly remembering his time with his Miss Cookie last summer.

"Well…when I was a little girl, Aunt Viola, Aunt Julie, and I had a governess who watched us kind of like a babysitter or nanny. She was an older woman who had her hands full keeping track of both Aunt Julie and me. I often snuck to the servants' quarters, whereas, Aunt Julie took to more dangerous conquests. So the governess often chased Julie—leaving me alone, but happy under the watchful care of Theodore and Marguerite."

Allie and Jack's faces were lit up with amusement, clearly enjoying the tales of their mother's and aunt's childhood mischief. Nathan smiled to himself—lightly shaking his head imagining his wife as a spirited young child.

"I, of course, loved to be left downstairs in the kitchen. Although I typically didn't get enough time to cook a complete meal, I enjoyed getting to stir dry ingredients here and wet ingredients there. All the while, I would ask endless questions from our head chef Marguerite and my other servant friends." Elizabeth laughed to herself at the memory.

Those were the times that Elizabeth felt seen and understood. In the kitchen, she was allowed to be a curious child. Creativity was rewarded and failures were fixable—or merely considered a learning experience. It was a drastically different world than the upstairs mansion of Society expectations.

The older she grew, the more she found herself playing the part upstairs while her true heart remained downstairs. She escaped as often as she could without jeopardizing her friends' position with her father.

Elizabeth continued more somberly, "Mr. Theodore and Marguerite…Miss Cookie…" She winked at Jack who nodded his approval. "They were and are precious to me, but as I grew it became increasingly difficult to sneak away from my life upstairs…"

Elizabeth had felt strangled by Society's and her mother's expectations. She knew she had support just down the stairs, but her mother kept her schedule tight and her studies extensive.

Without their regular influence, she felt herself slipping into the expected role of what Jack had called a Hamilton Princess, but even then her heart called her West—longing for something real.

"Well…as I got older, my schedule got busier and it became harder and harder to spend time alone with Mr. Theodore and Miss Cookie. I was a débutante that was paraded around by my mother at endless balls and formal dinners. It was the life that Grandmum thought was best for me. But instead, I had a dream to come out West and teach students just like you Allie."

Allie smiled warmly at her mother's admission.

"And I ended up meeting and falling in love with your Papa, Jack." Jack's eyes danced at the mention of his papa.

Nathan approached her—wrapping two strong arms around her shoulders for support. "And I'm thankful every day that you answered that call in your heart." He kissed her quickly and rested his head on hers.

The kids followed suit hugging her and the baby as well in a whole family hug. After a few moments and a polite request from their father, Allie and Jack headed upstairs together to get ready for bed.

Elizabeth rested her head against Nathan's chest, smiled, and turned her head to look up at him. "This note from Theodore and Marguerite," she said with a watery smile. "He knew I needed this. That I would struggle with the garland Mother sent. He even sent Marguerite's sugar cookie recipe…how is it that our paid staff can know me better than my own parents, Nathan?"

His eyes filled with compassion and he held her closer kissing her forehead. "I don't know. I'm sorry. I have felt that way a lot with my own father."

They stood together quietly lost in their own thoughts until footsteps on the stairs broke their revelry.

"Dad? Jack and I brushed our teeth and got ready for bed. Should we grab your Bible for the Advent reading or….." she trailed off as she processed the comforting moment her parents were having.

"Sure Sweetheart. Thank you." He looked down at his wife and kissed her forehead tenderly again. Elizabeth took a breath and set the recipe and note on the table to return to later before taking a seat beside Jack and Allie on the settee.

The night's reading featured the carved shepherd. It symbolized that we like sheep have all gone astray and that we are in need of a shepherd—a good shepherd that came to save us. Jack held the shepherd tightly, studying his features, as Nathan read from Scripture.

"I am the good shepherd; I know my own sheep, and they know me, just as my Father knows me and I know the Father. So I sacrifice my life for the sheep. I have other sheep, too, that are not in this sheepfold. I must bring them also. They will listen to my voice, and there will be one flock with one shepherd." *

Elizabeth sang the opening verses of "The First Noel" as Jack settled comfortably with his head on his "bruver" and his mother's hand stroking his hair.

The first Noel

The angels did say

Was to certain poor shepherds

In fields as they lay

In fields where they

Lay keeping their sheep

On a cold winter's night

That was so deep

Jack's eyelids fluttered, and his hand relaxed—letting the shepherd tumble to the floor announcing the boy's slumber. Allie and Nathan joined the chorus,

Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel

Born is the king of Israel

After the final verses, Nathan scooped his son up, while Elizabeth took her daughter's hand, and both were soon tucked in after a full day. Elizabeth readied for bed herself as Nathan went downstairs again to stoke the fire for the night.

She was brushing through her hair when she saw his tall frame leaning in the doorway.

"What are you thinking about, Love?" His voice was deep with concern.

"I'm conflicted. The garland is beautiful, of course, and I know that Mother loves me, and that she meant what she said. It's not really about the garland at all really…it's all of the gifts. Charlotte and your mother's were gifts from their heart. The garland was a reminder that I should be grateful for my upbringing which although privileged…was painful. Does that make any sense? I felt more loved by the note and recipe from Theodore and Marguerite than the newest Christmas tree trend from Simpson's. And then…nevermind."

Nathan's brow furrowed as he approached his wife. "What is it?"

"It's something you said about your mother. When you told me that I wouldn't be able to stop her from coming to meet her new grand baby…it resurfaced the hurt that my mother didn't come when Jack was born. She didn't even come to meet Jack at all. She had never been to Hope Valley until our wedding and unlike your mother, she is physically fine. She didn't come for my wedding to Jack, she didn't come for Jack's birth, or any of the years after…" Elizabeth trailed off in a sob as Nathan took her hands in his.

"But she has come now. She's trying to connect. She didn't know you as a kid. She didn't understand. She has told you herself that she admires your strength not to fold to Society's pressure. Believe her, Lizbeth. Give her a chance to become the mother she didn't know how to be. Keep forgiving her whenever you can."

She wiped her eyes and looked at the man who knew exactly what it was like to have a parent hurt them deeply.

"It's hard." She sniffled. "I don't know if I can trust her with my heart. She had ignored it for all those years."

"I know it is hard, Love. Forgiveness and trust are two different things, Lizbeth. Surely this family is proof of that. Give yourself time to heal. The love for her will come. You've been hurt over a long time. It won't be an instant fix. But you and I are proof that it's worth the time and effort to heal."

She leaned into his embrace and he kissed her forehead. He was right. She had been forgiven of much. Surely she could leave room for her mother to grow and Lord-willing it would produce a beautiful reconciliation someday.

—-

A/N:

Thanks to nebula2 and pn1thrasher for their extensive beta reading and patience with my billion questions.

Last chapter inspired this chapter's grandmother gifts. I like that each family is represented on their tree.

Grace Thatcher's gift is not intended to be a slam against store-bought Christmas (Lord knows I passionately love Hobby Lobby!), but rather, it's a symbol that not everything at Christmas glitters—meaning sometimes Christmas is hard. Sometimes there is dysfunction, sometimes there is grief and loss, sometimes there is the pain of divorce or illness, and sometimes there is the sting of someone we love that is missing. If any of that resonates, the garland is for you. I hope you get the time this Christmas to process and grieve and just be ok with not being ok.

Jack's angel ornament style was inspired by my kids sticking ornaments literally wherever. (Ahhh!)

I'll stick some pictures on the Sunday Night Serge Facebook group of the tree, warrior angel, and tree skirt that inspired those gifts.

Simpson's is a real department store that originated near Toronto in 1858. It was well known as a luxury department store and seemed right up Grace's alley.

The misnomer "Miss Cookie" was inspired by a family friend of ours who was affectionately known as "Kentucky." His wife, Sharon, we introduced to the kids as "Mrs. Kentucky" and my three year old son heard "Miss Tucky" and she has been Miss Tucky ever since.

*Bible Verse John 10:14-16 NLT "I am the good Shepherd…"