"And what exactly is this?"
"It's bacon, Freeza. It's strips of pork that you fry."
"Pork? I don't recall having anything with such a crude name."
"Well then space food must be terrible, bacon is one of the most delicious foods out there!"
Oolong gave Goku an angry look, which the Saiyan replied to with an embarrassed laugh. It had been a few hours since the team of Universe 7 had come back from the Tournament of Power. Given that they had not only won, but restored all of the universes erased during the competition, Bulma had organized a giant party for everyone.
Freeza had tried to weasel out of it, wanting nothing more to do with the earthlings now that his existence wasn't on the line, but Beerus shot him a look that said "You're still under my supervision, don't be a party pooper." So Freeza was now stuck at a table on the balcony, sitting next to Goku, Trunks, and Goten.
He took a small bite of the bacon (Using a fork of course, he had to stay civilized even on a backwater world such as this), and a bizarre feeling overcame him. Was this… delicious? No that can't be right, this food is from Earth! He stared at the crispy treat, trying to comprehend what exactly he thought of it.
Suddenly, the miniature Goku that sat next to him spoke up. "It's good, huh? It's one of the most delicious things ever made!" Goten said with excitement. He had never met Freeza, the warrior who pushed his father to ascend, so being able to sit next to him during a meal was a new and exciting experience for him. Freeza eyed him with his usual distain, and averted his eyes.
"Yes, I guess it is rather… good." Using his telepathy, he made a chair on the other side of the balcony fall over, attracting everyone's attention. With them distracted, he then used his telepathy once again to pull some extra servings to his plate. He'd have to bring a sample back to his scientists, see if they can create a synthetic duplicate.
"Huh, that was weird. Anyway, try the eggs too! They're scrambled eggs, they're whisked together before you cook them. Makes them all fluffy, great combo with the bacon." Goku explained. Freeza, already secretly enamored with the bacon, stuck his fork into the eggs. "Hmm, these are quite fluffy" he thought to himself. "Reminds me of Tuffle strips."
Freeza took a cautious bite, just in case the eggs were a trap for him, hatched by the idiotic Saiyan. But when they touched his tongue, he discovered how scrumptious they were. The rich flavor of these scrambled eggs had to be one of the most delicious things he'd ever had the pleasure of eating. Making sure yet again not to give away his inner delight, he looked back at Goku and said in a dignified tone "Yes, these are good eggs, definitely better than any I've had in my years as galactic emperor."
Then the spawn of Vegeta spoke up. Looking at him pained Freeza. Apparently, the warrior that had killed him all those years ago was, in fact, the son of Vegeta, Goku had explained prior to the party. Though he was from another timeline, Freeza couldn't help but feel uncomfortable when looking at the child, like he was splitting in half all over again.
"You should take the bacon and scoop up some eggs with it. That's what I do in the morning." Trunks said in a calmer voice than Goten. Freeza could give him that, he was a bit more dignified than Goku and his children. Guess Vegeta was good for something after all.
Following the child's advice, Freeza took some of his bacon and scooped up the eggs. He stuck it in his mouth, and simply couldn't help himself. He gave off a huge grin that made Goku drop his fork (A surprise since the Saiyan had an iron grip when it came to food). This instantly made the rest of the gathered champions turn in their direction, and all simultaneously do the same thing. Seeing Freeza smile like this over food was a sight to behold.
His anger quickly boiled to the surface. "WHAT ARE YOU ALL STARING AT?! CAN'T AN EMPEROR ENJOY A MEAL WITHOUT BEING SCRUTINIZED LIKE A CIRCUS ATTRACTION?!" he yelled loudly. Goten and Trunks started giggling. He turned to each of them, considering how best to obliterate them and make off with minimal damage, but decided against it. He had had enough fighting for the day, and he knew the Saiyans could contend with him now. So he sat down and continued eating.
A few hours later…
It was soon time for lunch. Freeza had yet again wanted to leave, but Goku said something to him that piqued his interest. "If you thought breakfast was good, wait until you have lunch. It's to die for." The Saiyan had then laughed, since everyone there had died at least once before in their lives.
Once Freeza sat down, a waiter placed a plate in front of him. On top of it was a cheeseburger. 1/4th lb. patty, cheddar cheese, sliced pickles, iceberg lettuce, mustard, ketchup and… bacon? Again? This confused the emperor.
"Hold on for a minute. You put bacon on this too?" Goku smiled. "Oh course! Bacon isn't JUST for breakfast, you can make it for other meals or use it with other foods. That's why food's so great, you can mix it together and make cool combos, kinda like fighting techniques." He then took a large bite out his burger (Which was three times the size of Freeza's), audibly smacking, annoying the tyrant.
The emperor looked at Trunks, who was silently slicing his own burger in half with his knife, causing the tyrant to sweat a little. Following suit, he took his own fork and cut his food in half, before grabbing one and taking a bite. How? How could Earth food keep surprising him? Not only was the bacon still delicious, but the burger was juicy, savory, and delectable! This was impossible, how could this be from this dump? This has to be the work of the Dragon Balls.
"Goku?" the tyrant said in a quiet voice. "What's the matter, Freeza?" the Saiyan responded while taking a sip of water. "I no longer wish to destroy this planet." That statement caused Goku to spit out all the liquid in his mouth.
One hour later…
Finally, it was time for Freeza to leave. Vegeta and his family had decided to retire to bed, but not before issuing a warning to Goku to keep an eye on the emperor, in case he tried anything. As Freeza prepared to take off into space, he heard a voice yell behind him. "Hold on a sec!" said the blue haired wife of Vegeta. In her arms was a bottle of… wine? Earth wine? For him? This was a strange day after all.
"Look, I know we're enemies, and I'm sure you'll be scheming after you leave the planet, but I got you this." She pushed the bottle into his hands, smiling as she did. He looked at the label. "Rosé?" For some reason, this word made both Saiyans turn their heads. "It's one of the oldest wines on Earth." she explained. "I remember Vegeta saying you like wine a lot, so I thought it might make a nice gift from Earth after the tournament."
This was one of the strangest things Freeza had ever experienced. He had tried to kill her and her friends on Namek, Earth, and would likely do the same again not even a month from now. But here was this blue haired earthling giving him a gift. Seriously, what is today? But his father had always taught him to accept gifts, for it was the polite thing to do.
"Thank you, Bloomer." he said. "It's Bulma." she replied in a slightly offended tone. "Yes. Thank you, Bulma." And with that, Freeza lifted into the air and left the atmosphere, soaring through the Milky Way galaxy, and into the known universe.
"So, shall we give the order to head towards Earth, my lord?" Kikono asked. It had been a few days since the Tournament of Power, and Freeza had reclaimed his throne as head of the Freeza Force. He took a slow, deep sip of his new Rosé wine, he quite liked the taste. "Belay that order. I'd say they've earned a bit of rest."