Summary: Olivia and Amanda have a little drunk girl talk about Olivia's lack of sex life. Amanda threatens to text Elliot for a late night booty call.

AN: Just a funny little one-shot about Olivia's drunk love confession to Amanda. As always, it's the no beta life for me.

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God, it's been forever since she's had boxed wine. Maybe since college or in the few years following, when she was on a lowly beat officer's salary and her NYC rent was over half her income.

It feels perfect for tonight though.

Olivia feels bad that this was as good as a bachelorette party that Amanda was going to get, but at the same time, it felt just right. She and Rollins are camped out in this shitty motel for as long as it takes for the Bronx Gang Department to finish their operation against BX9. Tonight, the night before Amanda's wedding, it was just them. Well just them, leftover pizza, and a giant box of red wine with a sleeve of clear solo cups.

"Did you…did you ever take my advice?" Rollins asks with a grin and a wiggle of her eyebrows as she takes another sip of the cheap wine.

"What advice?" Olivia asks with a frown, leaning against the headboard with her own clear cup resting on her knee.

"Damn, you didn't," Amanda grumbles, taking her response as a clear no. "I don't know what you are waiting for. You need to take a ticket on that ride." She shakes her head, so frustrated at her friend's lack of movement on her feelings. It was obvious to everyone, but maybe Stabler, that Olivia wanted to jump his bones.

"What are you talking about?"

"Come on, Liv," Amanda pleads playfully, "You can't tell me that you don't miss it? You have to miss it, it's been what? A couple years? Maybe more?"

Completely befuddled by Amanda's ramblings, Olivia huffs out, "Miss what?"

Ignoring Olivia's question, Amanda continues wistfully, "I'd miss it. Hell, I miss it after a few weeks. There is this thing Carisi does…" her cheeks reddened at the thought. "Anyway, I couldn't imagine months or years . You did at least sleep with Edgar, right? Or has it been even longer? God Liv! Please tell me that Tucker wasn't your last dick!" Her shocked face turned quickly to disgust.

Realization dawning on Olivia, slowed by the alcohol and shock at the turn of the conversation, she shrieks, "Amanda! God stop!"

"No, this is serious! How can I leave knowing that I've been a terrible wing woman? How could I have let you go this long?" Amanda asks, scandalized by her own failure.

"Amanda, you've been an excellent wing woman," Olivia assures, laughing now and leaning forward to grip Amanda's shoulder.

"No I haven't! But that stops now! I'm calling that asshole Stabler." Amanda scrambles up from the bed, nearly spilling her wine before she sits it down. She whips her head from side to side, looking around for her cellphone.

Olivia jumps from her spot, determined to stop Amanda from finding her phone. "Don't you dare!"

"This is serious. You're a starved woman. You've got to break your fast and I've seen you looking at that bald buffoon. I know you want his– AH HA!" Amanda sees her phone peeking out from one of the pillows and lunges for it.

Olivia, following Amanda's line of sight, throws her body onto the bed with her arms outstretched, missing the phone by nanoseconds.

Smiling and laughing Amanda swipes through her contacts list for Elliot and begins tapping out her message.

" Det. Stabler, you need to get your ass to Rodeway Inn in Hoboken NJ room 2409 ASAP! It's a dire situation! Capt. Benson needs to ride your dick—right now! " She reads aloud as texts.

"I will fire you if you send that," Olivia threatens as she tries to plan her attack on Amanda to get the phone, the bed between them proving to be a real obstacle.

"You can't!" Amanda yells back teasingly through her laughs, "I don't work for anymore!"

"Amanda, please, I'm begging you. Please do not send that," Olivia begs.

Hearing the change in her friend's tone Amanda looks up and sees the real desperation in Olivia's eyes.

Amanda takes a couple of deep breaths to calm her excitement. "Come on. I know you like him, Liv. You two just need a jump start." Amanda urges, trying at least to get Olivia to admit the obvious even if she would never let her send this text.

Olivia's shoulders fall, and she sits on the bed with a deep exhale, "I don't like him."

"Stop lying to yourself."

"No, I don't like him. I love him, Amanda. I love him, and I have no fucking clue what to do about it," Olivia admits as she collapses, her back hits the mattress with her arms outside.

"Woah," Amanda huffs and sits on the bed next to Olivia.

"Yea, big woah ."

"For how long?"

Rolling her head side to side with her eyes closed, Olivia says, "It'd be easier to tell you how long I haven't."

"So, uh, sending this text to him probably wouldn't help."

"No, but he'd probably think it's hilarious though," she answers with a small chuckle, thinking of the stupid message Amanda had typed out.

Amanda's eyes grow and her heart pounds as she looks down at her phone and sees that the message isn't in the text window, but in a blue message bubble.

"That's good. Because, uh…" Amanda shows Olivia her phone screen and the sent message.

"You didn't," Olivia sits up straight. "Shit!"

Buzz…buzz…buzz…buzz

Olivia's phone vibrates on the nightstand next to the bed. She can see "Elliot Stabler" flash across the top of the screen for a few seconds before the screen goes black.

"No. No. No."

Buzz…buzz…buzz…buzz

Her phone vibrates again.

"Oh god! I'm so sorry, Liv!"