New York City was rainy, dreary and beyond miserable. It had been that way all day as James hid in the shadows of Lily's spotlight. He'd worked his whole life to find something that made him feel the way she did, but he felt so lost with her so far out of reach. T he sun was sinking below the clouds, signaling that it was time to go to the red carpet premiere.
The glow on the dark pavement was almost golden, mixing with the dusky colours of Lily's ball gown. Her slim hands were holding a pink ruffled umbrella close to her body. It was protecting the massive amounts of make-up and expensive clothing. James couldn't help but feel her umbrella added a extra sense of 'touch-me-and-I'll-beat-you-withthis-umbrella' to her already anxious expression.
Lily's short red hair was twisted up into the nape of her neck with hundreds of little curls forming the bun. She looked like a duskier, modern version of a character from one of Shakespeare's plays. The dress had long, draping sleeves that fell in waves. Her intricate hairstyle only framed her sharply curved neck. James had a hard time looking away while the streetlights cast her in a dramatic glare of yellowing light.
Some parts of their life together seemed fairytale-like, especially the parts he was trying too hard to forget. James tried not to remember her burning touch, and the shifting washer touch had a hold on his heart. He thought of quality nights where Lily's hands were trapped in his hair like he was her own magnetic field. He remembered burning kisses under sheets and bright laughter on the New York streets. James wished they'd been able to talk so that he could apologise properly for lashing out at her due to his own insecurities.
James considered that she looked like molten lava. He felt that if he touched her again, he might get burned and branded hers. Not that she hadn't practically branded him before that night. She was standing so close, but he felt oceans far away. Lily looked back at him subtly, her eyes catching his pointedly. She wanted him at her side, holding her hand, not holding himself back.
But he had to be her bodyguard tonight, not her lover.
"The car is here."
His gaze was fixated on her, instead of the dark corners of his vision. Even now, he stood a little behind Lily as the car pulled in to take her to the movie premiere. His black suit faded into the blackened building behind them. Lily glowed like a goddess under the lamps on the street and he was dark, like a shadow. It was tragic, loving someone who'd grown up in a plastic world built on false confidence and succulent lies. He wanted to ask her to dance right there in the rain, but he resisted, their tête-à-têtes the night before holding him in his place.
He was a broken soldier; twisted and fashioned by all the cruelties of the world. She was a Hollywood darling; twisted and fashioned by all the treasures in the world. Together, they made a beautiful and tragic fusion of real life and fairytale.
The car door was opened by the driver and she paused before getting in, sensing James' turmoil just by looking at him through her dark lashes. He was distracted, which was not the best thing to be as her personal bodyguard, but he couldn't help it. They were both lost in their own nightmares, daydreams, confessions, and insecurities.
The rain covered Lily's arm like dewdrops as she lowered her umbrella and closed it for James to take. His lips were pursed tightly as the rain started coming down in sheets again. James stared up at the sky angrily, clearly mad it was raining. The rain dripped down his curly hair and onto his neck, annoying him further.
Lily's hand touched James' for a few moments. She watched as he shook out the umbrella. He settled into the seat beside her in the car, shutting the car door so the driver could start driving down the road. She picked at her nail polish on her fingers, a sign that she was nervous.
"I hate this city."
Her voice is harsh, stark, and a reminder of the sliver of darkness she hid from the world, but never from him. James had only known Lily officially since May, but he felt like he had known her for years. James turned his head in the darkness of the car to catch Lily gazing out the window forlornly.
"Tomorrow we can go back to London," he said, "if you want."
"I don't want to go there either."
The driver was slow, navigating the busy New York City streets. Lily fiddled with her pocketbook, nervous about making an appearance when so many things had happened in the last 48 hours.
"You look beautiful tonight." James said and she flushed with pride from his admittance.
Her dress was a mixture of reds, golds, and browns. It was form fitting on the top and fairy-like on the bottom. She always liked to dress according to her emotions and the dress made James think of a princess, ready for battle. The only problem was that in the battle that she was currently trying to fight, she was losing.
Lily's hand touched her cheek, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear as she whispered, "I'd rather be in Lake Placid, with you, alone."
James was thrown back to the cabin, where her hands had often got caught up in his hair. He remembered steaming tubs, freezing snowstorms, hot bodies under covers, and frayed curtains blowing in the wind. James was imagining her green eyes and how they vividly traced his body as she pulled him into her room laughing.
James missed the quiet times with Lily so much.
Lily turned in her seat suddenly and caught his gaze. Between them, silent words passed. She sensed his sadness, his similar feelings of regret. They both sucked at emotions sometimes. She shouldn't have pushed him. Her hand slipped across the leather seats and her fingers laced into his. They were both silent in that moment, determined to remember why they started and where they ended.
He finally plucked up the courage to speak. "I meant what I said. You look beautiful tonight, Red."
He used her nickname affectionately, trying to make up for lost time. Lily bit her lip back, something stopping her from saying anything at all. The driver took a sudden turn into the venue and James dropped her hand. Lily tried to grab it again, but he shook his head.
"I need to be focused," he told her, "I promise I'll never let go of your hand after tonight."
Everyone was watching as Lily flashed the cameras a smile once she got out of the limo. James slunk back in the shadows behind her. She was the sun, the center of everyone's universe while James was a star, adoring her from afar in the darkness. She radiated kindness, warmth and love as she stopped by a barrier where her fans were shouting her name. She took a picture with as many of them as possible, her smile small.
Nobody there could guess that her smile wasn't real.
James had seen her real smile, a glowing thing that grew and grew until her cheeks were puffy and her eyes turned to slits. He had seen her smile like that many times, but only for him. He could tell that she faked each smile and forced each laugh. She had anxiety from firing her manager and gaining a new one in a week. She felt pressure from the world to continue showing up and making music despite the betrayal.
James walked behind Lily while she made her way to the main press center, and her attention turned to him momentarily. Cameras flashed again, and Lily's pale skin lit up like diamonds. She reached out to touch the hands from fans, who were begging for attention from the pop star. Lily's fellow Piper actors were signing autographs fifty feet ahead. Lily was taking her time moving through the cameras and crowds of people screaming her name.
James was searching the crowd with unease settling in his bones. There were so many people pushing, shoving and grabbing for the stars on the carpet. It was an absolute madhouse. Lily was distracted again, this time by a reporter who'd shoved a microphone into her hand. James was just checking the crowded stands behind them when he saw the man step forward through the masses with a wicked look on his face.
Without even pausing to think, James shoved Lily into the bodies lined up on the press wall without warning. He heard her call out from surprise but he didn't even dare check on her, as he was too busy staring down their nemesis. James wasn't going to lose Lily, not this way, not after everything they'd been through.
"Somebody take Lily, and go!"
The man behind the gun wasn't one who had mercy in his eyes. The trigger was pulled, and the explosion was loud enough to make everyone nearby drop to the ground in fear. It was as if the universe wanted to tell James Potter that the only reason he had lived through a deployment, two bombs, and a leg amputation was so that he could meet his soulmate Lily Evans, and save her life, only to subsequently lose his own.