Title: Her Father's Daughter
Rating: T
Pairing: Maria/Georg married
Summary: What happens when Maria leaves a feuding Georg and Louisa for the weekend?
Time Period: Spring, 1942
Liesl: 20
Friedrich: 18
Louisa: 17
Kurt: 15
Brigitta: 14
Marta: 11
Gretel: 9
Josie: 3
Margaretta (Etta): 2
Her Father's Daughter
"Darling, are you sure you'll be all right with Liesl and I gone until Sunday?" Maria asked for what felt like the forty-seventh time as she packed a bag for a short weekend trip with her eldest girl.
"Maria," Georg sighed. "If memory serves, I have been alone with seven children before. Go with Liesl to that showing, decide what she wants and doesn't want in a wartime wedding gown, then talk her into whatever isn't going to have us take a mortgage out on the place. Have a good time. We'll be fine."
"I do remember you being alone with seven children before, my love," Maria replied. "And I also remember you had two cooks, three chamber maids, a chief housekeeper, a butler and oh, 11 governesses. It was not your finest hour, plus you weren't having the…difficulties you are now with Louisa."
"I've always had difficulties with Louisa, that's part of the reason I had 11 governesses," Georg replied wryly. "It's going to be fine, she'll go her way, I'll go my way, we'll be fine."
Maria knew Georg was playing it off. For a former sea captain and war hero, he actually hated conflict and did his best to avoid it,especially now that he'd settled into America. Here he wasn't the "Captain", he was just Georg Trapp with the big family that lived up on the hill. Maria knew he liked that; he liked being able to be just himself.
Liesl was engaged to a sweet young man, Patrick Watts, she was 20 and getting married around Christmas provided he got his leave. In the meantime, she'd taken a job in town and lived in a small apartment above the storefront where she worked. She enjoyed her independence.
Friedrich was in the service, a seamen aboard a destroyer in the Pacific, leaving Louisa as the eldest girl at home. Their two youngest, also daughters, had their mother's spirit with thankfully a touch of their father's discipline. They were good girls but needed keeping after. Louisa did not have the gift for doing that the way Liesl had, and Georg was often frustrated with her lackadaisical approach to being the oldest.
Louisa had struggled the most with the changes that occuredin their family the last few years. She had been the last to accept Maria as governess and as their new mother. She had struggled with their flight from Austria and move to America more than her siblings had. She was often quiet and sullen, just as Georg would be when he was dealing with something he didn't like.
Since Pearl Harbor though, Louisa's behavior had gotten worse. She had started to challenge Georg at every turn; first she cut her hair without permission and started to wear pants outside the house. Recently, things had come to a head. Louisa had been caught lying to Maria and Georg about who she was spending time with in town. Neither parent approved of Louisa being in mixed company without their permission. Louisa felt the rule that she had to bring home any boy she was interested in was old-fashioned and aristocratic. As such, she'd told her parents that she was going to have sodas with two girls from school, leaving out they were bringing dates and had secured a partner for her.
Maria didn't think she'd ever seen Georg angrier than when they had walked into the soda shop with the youngest four after shoe shopping to reward the youngsters for good behavior. Maria recalled she had to physically restrain her husband from making a spectacle of himself and their daughter right then and there, but the explosion when Louisa came home was enough to rattle the windowpanes.
Since then, father and daughter were barely speaking and when Georg did engage Louisa it felt like he was always correcting her. When Louisa engaged Georg, it felt like she was disrespecting him. Maria did not feel at all comfortable with the idea of being away from them, she was the peacemaker, the border between the two countries that had come from parent and child.
"Still, I'm going to have a talk with her before we go," Maria reasoned. "And you need to talk to her as well. It really can't go on like this. Before you know it, she'll be getting married too."
"Heaven help the man," Georg grumbled. He knew of all his children's adolescence, there was none he was dreading more than Brigitta's, however Louisa was giving him challenges he'd never even thought she would.
"What was that?" Maria asked as she stepped out of their bathroom, her bag was packed, she was getting ready for bed.
"I have talked to her," Georg replied, not wishing to repeat his previous murmuring.
"You need to listen to her. Sometimes, yes, the children near a strong hand, but I think in this case, a lighter touch may just win the day," Maria observed "Think on it. Now, you need your sleep if you're going to keep up with the little girls this weekend."
Georg smiled at her as he too readied himself for bed. In just a pair of pajama bottoms he slid into bed beside her. "You know…I've been thinking…" He needed to get off the subject of Louisa.
"Oh?" Maria knew what that look meant.
"Umm, hmmm," he replied. "About Kurt."
"Oh?" she raised an eyebrow as Georg moved closer and closer until he was partially on top of her. "What about Kurt?"
"Well," Georg replied beginning to lay a trail of warm kisses from the corner of Maria's jaw down her neck. "With Friedrich in the Navy, he's the only boy in the house and…I was thinking maybe we should try and even things up a bit?"
"Georg…" Maria shook her head but met his kisses with desire. "You have two sons and seven daughters, there's not a sucker in the world that would be willing to take that bet."
Georg pretended to think on that comment, "You're right…But who says we can't have fun trying?"
Maria couldn't argue with that.
Early the next morning, Maria knocked on Louisa's door. As the oldest at home, she now had her own room. "Please do your best to help your Father while I'm gone. He says he can manage but the little ones are all over the place and he'll need another set of eyes."
Louisa nodded, "I know, Mother. I don't know why Father is always telling me I don't help out enough or I don't study enough or things like that. I am going to take Marta and Gretel to the park and help with supper."
"Supper is all settled except for something sweet," Maria replied. "You can pick something up and put it on the account at the bakery. I have all the meals fixed in the refrigerator, so you don't have to worry about that. Make sure when you are at home you are studying for the entrance examinations coming up."
"That's why Father said I couldn't go with you this weekend, I remember," Louisa replied with a role of her eyes.
"Try to get along, please," Maria instructed. "You might be angry with each other right now, but he is still your Father, and you own him that respect."
Maria gave Louisa a hug, "I know you're going to do wonderfully running the house for me this weekend. I love you. Study hard."
"I will, Mother," Louisa assured. "I love you, too."
As Georg helped Maria and Liesl pack up Liesl's small Ford, Maria had a similar warning for her husband. "I spoke with Louisa, but Georg, try to give her some space. She's not a baby anymore, she has her own mind and has been taught to make her own choices. Let her express herself a little bit, don't keep stifling her. Listen to her, please, Darling."
Georg nodded and gave Maria a kiss. "We'll be fine. Go and have a good time this weekend. Oh, make sure you put some fuel in the car before you come back in case it goes up again. Do you need ration stamps?"
"I have some, Father," Liesl replied. "And I won't go crazy, there's a war on, there's not that much in the way of wedding items even coming out right now." She leaned up and whispered into her father's ear. "We're going to give Mother a break, she needs it."
"That she does," Georg agreed. "Be safe, call me when you get settled."
Georg reached out and touched Liesl's cheek as he often did. "You look so much like your Mother," he whispered, referring to Agathe. "I am so proud of you, Liesl. You're a wonderful, beautiful young woman."
None of the eldest von Trapps knew Louisa heard her father's every word as she stood near the open kitchen window.
Georg took a deep breath before going inside. The children would be waking up and Josie and Etta would need help getting dressed. He wasn't surprised to find Etta awake toddling around the kitchen with her blanket in her hand. "Mama…" she murmured. She was a Mommy's girl, whereas Josie was her Daddy's angel. Georg stooped down to pick Etta up and put her on his hip. "Mama's went bye bye for a little while," he told her. "We're going to have breakfast and go and play outside with Josie."
"Father," Louisa spoke up. "I can take Marta and Gretel to the park for a walk and for lunch if you'd like."
"I think it's best if we all stick closer to home, Louisa," Georg replied as Etta began to cry for her mother. "It's going to be a hectic day and we don't need to add any worry. One of the girls might get hurt if they play too roughly."
Louisa turned her back and rolled her eyes. He didn't even trust her to take her sisters out to play, yet her mother asked her to help him. This was going to be the longest weekend of her life.
"Once you've had breakfast, you best get on with studying," Georg advised. "The tests are very difficult for Vassar and Wellesley, even Liesl struggled to pass them."
"But she passed and chose to get married instead," Louisa reminded him.
"She passed in the top 3% and she will always have that achievement, married or single," he countered. "What would you like to have to eat? I know your mother left bread and cheese for lunch and has some supper ready to heat, but breakfast we are on our own."
Requests for different meals began to come in slowly but surely, and Georg found himself working like a short order cook in a diner. Louisa held Etta on her lap while Kurt and Brigitta got the younger ones settled and set the table for a meal of pancakes, eggs, smoked bacon, and biscuits.
Georg often wondered if they weren't self-sufficient up here how he would feed his large family given the rationing. It had been a struggle during the Great War even for the wealthiest families, and even on the farm they felt the sting.
After breakfast, the children went outside to play. Etta stayed attached to her father's side given her mother was not currently an option. Josie was outgoing like Maria, Etta was more introverted, a lot like him.
As the day wore on, Georg found himself thankful that he had married a woman 20 years his junior. She could keep up with the kids much more than he could. He found himself exhausted and it was just past lunchtime.
Louisa noticed her father was having a hard time keeping up as she watched from her bedroom window. She decided instead of walking down to the bake shop with the entire family in tow, she would make dessert herself. Her mother kept recipes in the kitchen cabinet. She decided she would pick one out and make it that evening.
It was late afternoon when Georg brought the younger children inside for their naps. He didn't notice Louisa working in the kitchen right away, she had bent down to get an ingredient from the cabinet. She was busily mixing up a dough when he returned. "What are you doing? Your Mother left our meals already prepared; you don't have to worry about any of this."
"I'm making up a dessert for tonight," Louisa replied. "Mother has a lot of interesting recipes."
"I sent your brother and sisters to town to get some cookies, you don't have to do that. You should be studying for your exams."
"Ugh!" Louisa groaned in frustration. He didn't appreciate a thing she tried to do.
"Okay fine!" she snapped and started to dump the mixture down the kitchen drain.
"Louisa, what are you doing? I didn't say throw it out…" Georg began. This didn't go the way he intended.
"But you meant it!" Louisa cried. "You don't think I can do anything!"
She tossed the empty bowl into the sink and went to her room slamming the door behind her, not caring if the sound woke the babies or not.
Thankfully, Josie and Etta stayed asleep so Georg could deal with his oldest girl. He knocked on the door, he could hear her crying from outside of it. "Louisa," he called. "May I come in?"
"No," she replied firmly, but Georg ignored her and pushed the door open anyway.
"I'm studying…" she sniffled though the book in front of her was still closed. "But don't expect me to get accepted to as many places as Liesl or to cook as well as Liesl or anything I do to be as good was Liesl because I'm not as pretty, I'm not as talented, and I'm definitely not as smart."
She stifled a sob, still looking down at her book and not into her father's eyes. It hit Georg like a freight train. In trying to encourage Louisa and hold Liesl up as an example for her, he had served only to make her feel inadequate in his eyes. "Is that what you think?" he asked, praying he was wrong but knowing he wasn't. "That I want you to be like Liesl? Louisa, I love you just the way you are, you know that."
Her next words surprised him, but what made it worse was he knew she didn't say them for effect, it was how she felt in her heart. "No, you don't. You hate me!" She could barely get the words out. Every instinct in Georg's body was trying to force him to run to his little girl, to hug her and make it all right, but he knew that he couldn't fix this with a simple hug. "Louisa, look at me!" he commanded, though once again, his mouth was betraying him. He didn't mean to bark at her, he was shocked at how she felt about their relationship. True, it had been struggling, but for her to think he hated her and wanted her to be someone other than who she was…
Louisa locked her jaw and her shoulders, just the way he would when he was about to dig in his heels over something and refused to meet his eyes.
He shut his eyes and thought of how to do this. "Okay," he replied. "You want to talk about Liesl, let's talk about her. Your sister was born during a very difficult time for me. The Great War had just ended and with it my naval career, my prestige, so many things that I used to define who I was. I was in Budapest when I got the telegram that I had a new baby daughter. My heart was bursting I was so proud."
Louisa wiped her eyes. Of course, he was proud, he was always proud of Liesl. "She was everything I hoped for. So much like your mother, so sweet, radiant…When Friedrich came, I was in Stockholm, he was almost two weeks old before I even met him." Georg moved a little closer to Louisa. She still refused to look at him.
"Then along comes daughter number two," Georg continued. "Only this time I was there. Did you know I was the first person to hold you beside Frau Gunther? I even held you before your mother. You were perfect. I looked into your eyes, and I fell in love with you that instant, and Louisa, that has never changed, that could never change. I've done a lot of things in my life, but holding you so small, so new to this world, was the single most thrilling moment I can remember, even now."
Louisa's stance was starting to soften. She dropped her shoulders, something he also did when Maria or Max or someone was breaking through his tension to make him see another point of view. "As you started to grow, however, I realized you weren't like your mother or your sister at all. You were more determined, willful, headstrong…downright stubborn. What I eventually realized was you were like me."
Louisa turned to face him, her eyes red and swollen from her tears. "You?" She said it as if he'd been speaking another language, one from a planet they'd never heard of. How could she be like him? He thought everything she did…
Georg was speaking again. "We're cut from the same cloth, you and me. Why do you think we argue so much? I love you more than anything, and I understand you far better than you could even imagine. That's why these last few months we've been arguing have been like a nightmare for me, because you have been so upset, and I didn't know how to help you." Georg swallowed the lump of emotion that had gathered in his throat thinking back over the last few months.
Ever since Pearl. Hearing the news on the radio had upset all of them, especially with Friedrich enlisted. A school acquaintance of Louisa's had lost her father; it seemed even in Stowe, Vermont the war had touched so many people. She had acted out since then, doing whatever she could to get under his skin, just like she had back in Austria when he'd been travelling to Vienna to avoid his life. He didn't want to admit then what he could change to make things easier for her, and this time, it seemed to be out of his hands. He took a slow shuddering breath and confessed, "I feel like I've failed you, baby girl."
Something in her father's voice broke into Louisa's soul. She turned, with her face raw and eyes swollen and looked at her father. His own face had tear tracks on it and his own eyes were tinged red with sadness. "I'm sorry," she sobbed, reaching out for him to hold her. "I'm sorry for everything!"
Georg caught Louisa in his arms and pulled her into his lap like he would have done had she been seven instead of seventeen, for in that moment she was his little baby again and needed her father to chase away all the hurt and pain inside. "Oh, Louisa," he sighed holding her tight. "It's all right, it's going to be all right, you'll see. There's nothing to be afraid of."
She rubbed her face on his shirt and pulled back, "How did you know I was afraid? I didn't…"
"Because I act just like that whenever I feel afraid," Georg replied. "When your birth mother died and I was left to bring you up alone, I was terrified I would do it wrong or that Heaven forbid, God would take one of you from me. I couldn't live with it, so I acted terribly. If we didn't get too close then it wouldn't hurt so much…I tend to get things pretty rattled around in my head when I'm feeling afraid. Do you remember when Mother left for the abbey with just a note. I was so terrified and confused about what to do I proposed marriage to Baroness Schrader. You and I do some silly things when we're frightened. Like running around with boys when you're not supposed to, and not keeping up with your studies when you are supposed to…things like that."
Georg kissed Louisa's head and wiped her cheeks with his thumb. "Maria taught me that it's okay to feel afraid. It's okay to lose things, darling girl, because when God closes a door, he opens a window. You just need to look for which window that was. Are you scared for Friedrich?"
Louisa shrugged, "A little," she replied. "But that's not why."
"Then why?" Georg asked. "Tell me."
Louisa started to cry harder once again. She buried her face so that Georg couldn't see her as she confessed, "I don't want anything to happen to you."
That was the last thing he expected, but he should've known better. Louisa had been pushing him away, enticing his anger. He had responded by holding up her sister as a role model, not thinking how it might come across to Louisa. "Me?" he asked. "I don't understand."
"What if the Germans come like the Japanese?" Louisa asked. "What if they find us here and they take you?"
"Oh, sweetheart," Georg sighed rocking her in his arms. "That won't happen, Darling. The Germans are too busy in France and England to try to invade the United States. Besides, the United States put a lot of fire power in the Atlantic Ocean, left the Pacific Ocean wide open. The military would stop them before they got anywhere near Stowe, Vermont. Nothing is going to happen to me, I'm going to be fine, we're all going to be fine."
Even with his reassurance, it seemed Louisa still had a lot of pent-up emotion inside of her. Georg didn't know what else to say, so he followed his heart and kept silent except for whispering, "Let it go, baby…"
Louisa cried as Georg had never seen before as he rocked her on his lap. He tried to remember doing this for her when she was a child, but he couldn't. She had always been the strongest of the lot. She was brave, climbing up trees and trellises, she had no fear, at least that's what he thought. As it turned out, she had the same fears as he did, a fear so deep and so hot inside a man could forget his fear of Hell, the fear of being alone, so potent and powerful that alone was all you ended up wanting to be.
How had he missed it? She was just like him, he knew it from the moment she started to crawl, why of all the thing he could have given her, why of all the good qualities he'd given to her, did he have to give her this? What was "this"? He didn't even have a name for it, the uncanny ability to lock up so tightly you lose all sense of what it is to be human, until you explode. He'd done it, on his blasted honeymoon with Maria, he had done it, and now Louisa, his daughter who he loved and wanted to keep from the slightest hurt, was doing it too and all he could do was sweep up after the pain.
Georg thought back to the Mass the weekend after Pearl Harbor was bombed. Father O'Malley had mentioned Louisa's friend's family in the Mass and asked a prayer for them. Louisa didn't know the girl well, she was probably closer to Brigitta's age, but she had walked up to this grieving child and said, "I'm sorry."
The girl replied, "What are you apologizing.? You didn't kill my father, the Japanese did."
Georg didn't hear all of Louisa's reply because Josie was pulling on his leg to get his attention, but he remembered hearing her say, "I'm still waiting for someone to apologize to me."
Georg kissed Louisa's temple, feeling tears of his own soak into her hair. "I'm sorry, Louisa," he whispered. "I'm so, so sorry."
The words seemed to have a healing balm inside of them. Only a few minutes later, Louisa's breathing started to calm down and her body started to relax. Georg didn't stop rocking her until he was sure she was fast asleep. An emotional deluge like the one Louisa just experienced was draining.
Georg could hear the other children returning from their walk to town; he didn't want them to come rushing into Louisa's room and wake her. He gently eased her onto her side and covered her with the afghan Maria had knitted for her. It was intended to be a scarf, but Maria wasn't much on knitting, sewing yes, but knitting she didn't know from. He gave a light chuckle at the memory of his wife's face when she saw how large that so-called scarf turned out to be.
"Ssh," Georg urged as soon as he came out of Louisa's room. "Your sister has a very big test coming up soon, she needs quiet. Go back outside and play. I'll heat up supper in a few hours, then after we'll all listen to the radio. Off with you now, and no noise by her window either!"
Kurt assumed the role as "oldest" for the time being and kept Marta and Gretel occupied. Brigitta could always content herself with a book; her noise level was never a worry. When the littlest ones woke up, Georg took them out to play as well.
It was getting dark when Louisa woke up. She looked around the room, had that really happened? Had she had a total emotional eruption in front of her father? She had tried to be so strong for him, she saw what leaving home had done to his pride, his spirit, everything. Now with America in the war too, and Friedrich fighting the Germans in the Atlantic, how could he not be as scared as she?
Louisa surveyed her appearance, she looked terrible. Her face was blotchy and her eyes still gritty and red. Yes, she determined, it had happened.
The family was having supper when Louisa came out. She'd put cool rags on her eyes and washed her face to keep Brigitta from asking questions. Georg only smiled at her, "I kept you a plate in the oven."
She nodded, the air between them feeling so much lighter. Louisa sat at the table and silently thanked the Lord as her parents emphasized at each meal. She had a lot to be thankful for.
Georg didn't bring up their discussion again. He knew that like him, Louisa would talk if she was ready. It killed him not to push her, but if he pushed too hard, she'd go right back in her shell. He was pleased when after the other children had gone to their rooms, she sought him out.
"Father, aren't you frightened about the war coming here like it did back home?" she asked, fiddling with the ribbon on her nightgown.
"No," Georg replied. "I'm not. I believe the worst of the war has already come here, Pearl was the worst thing that could happen to a country like this, and it already happened, and guess what?"
Louisa raised her eyebrow for him to continue. "They haven't given up or given in, and neither will we, Louisa. No matter how long the war goes on, we won't give up or give in. I believe President Roosevelt when he says the Americans will win. I've fought against Americans and Brits before; I know how well they fight. So, no, Louisa, I'm not afraid, not of that."
"Of what?" Louisa asked. "Are you scared for Friedrich?"
"Yes," Georg replied quickly. "I'm terrified so is your Mother. I hold my breath every time I see the Western Union man come by, but as much as I love Friedrich, and Lord knows I do, I have eight other children that need me, I have a wife that needs me, I can't let it control me. I express it, usually to your Mother, and I let it go."
"How?" she pressed. "You say we are the same, why can't I let it go?"
"You're seventeen, I'm well past 50," Georg replied. "You'll learn and, in the meantime, I'm here, your Mother is here, if there's something on your mind, Louisa, come to us, tell us and we'll listen always. You don't need to act out to get my attention anymore, I'm sorry I ever put you in a place where you did."
Louisa smiled at Georg and moved across the room to hug him. "I'm sorry too," Louisa whispered as Georg accepted her hug. "Maybe we can promise, no matter what happens, we won't push each other away, we'll pull each other closer?"
"That sounds like a very good habit to start," he replied. "Now, I think you should go to bed, your exams are in a few days and rest is just as important as study. I'm going to go in myself, I know now why people have children when they are 20 something or 30 something as opposed to 50 something."
Louisa laughed as they walked to the bedrooms arm in arm.
When Maria got home on Sunday evening, she wasn't sure what to expect, but finding Georg and the children listening to the evening concert on the radio, all together, with Louisa right beside him, laughing at something he had just said was not at all what she'd dared to hope for.
Etta spotted her first, she was in her pajamas already, taking some milk before being put to sleep. "Mama!" she cried out and took off for Maria at full speed.
"Mother! Momma!" came the delighted gasps of her children as they all came to hug her close and welcome her home. Georg held back, "And aren't you glad to see me?" Maria asked playfully as he approached her to take her into his arms.
"Save the best for last," he whispered taking her lips in a kiss she felt throughout her entire body. They didn't bother to hide their affection from the children, they both hoped their children, boy or girl, could one day find a love like theirs.
It took a long time to get the little ones down that night, they had missed Maria so much. When they finally did go to sleep, and Georg and Maria were alone, she finally got to find out what had changed, for she knew something did. "What happened? I came home expecting to find Louisa in her room at the very best of circumstances and you two were smiling and laughing together. It seems I worried for nothing."
"No," Georg replied. "Not for nothing, I'm afraid we did have a bit of an argument yesterday afternoon, but then, I did what you suggested, and I listened to my daughter. Then I talked to her, not at her, and got her to open up to me. I should have known you were right all along, after all, you know how to get me to share my feelings better than anyone I've ever known."
Georg pulled Maria into his arms and slowly danced her toward their bed, "How did you know that all my arguments and demands would only make things worse? How did you know she needed a lighter touch, when usually, Maria you are actually much stricter than I?"
Maria leaned up and kissed Georg's lips softly, inhaling the scent she had missed the last two days in a too sterile hotel room. "That's easy," she replied, sliding her arms around his neck and kissing him softly along the jawline. "She's her father's daughter, and you Captain, are as easy to read as a children's book."
"Hmmm…" Georg sighed. "But that's definitely enough talk about the children for tonight, for this is the part of the evening that's for adults only…"
Maria licked her lips in anticipation of his kiss, "That's my favorite part," she whispered as she reached over to turn out the light.
A/N: Some of you might recognize the conversation Louisa and Georg have as being a part of an Army Wives scenes and yes it was. I was watching and just got the image in my head of this pair having a similar talk. Just wanted to make a note of that. Thanks for reading.