Rey tried to push back any thoughts about Ben. She decided she would concentrate on school and work and nothing more. She didn't need any further distractions.
She finished her classes for the day and was pushing a cleaning cloth around the surface of the wood on the bar at the Cantina when she heard a voice coming from the other side of the bar.
"Hey there, can I get a dark pilsner please", the man asked. His voice was smooth and deep.
Rey looked up and was met with a set of kind brown eyes, the color of expresso. The man that stood in front of her appeared to be about the same age as she was, give or take a year.
He smiled at her, and she smiled back tentatively as she went to grab a beer glass from the other side of the bar. She poured the beer from the tap and handed him the glass.
He reached out and extended his hand with a five-dollar bill. "Here you go mam".
Rey took the bill from his hand. She couldn't help but to break out a grin. She was nearly 20 years old but most people thought she was younger than her actual age and no one had called her 'mam' before.
"I'm Finn, Finn Storm", the man introduced himself. He outstretched his hand for her to shake and she obliged.
"I'm Rey", she replied. "I haven't seen you around these parts before Finn. Are you new to town?" Rey questioned.
"Nah, I'm a junior over at Osseriton University, about 20 miles south of here but the bars serve beer that tastes like salt water. I like this place much better. Plus, the bars in Osseriton don't have beautiful bartenders such as yourself", he remarked.
Rey blushed. She hadn't been called beautiful before by anyone. She had always hoped that secretly Ben found her beautiful even if he didn't say it to her. She brushed that thought aside because it didn't matter anymore. Ben was engaged and getting married to Bazine Netal.
Rey had recognized the name as soon as the name left Ben's mouth. Bazine was two years ahead of her in school but she had developed quite a reputation in the time that she was in school. She was beautiful, with high cheekbones and blue eyes that almost appeared to be violet in the right lighting. Her hair was the color of a black dahlia, dark as midnight with streaks of purple highlights. She was sophisticated, came from money and had an air of arrogance surrounding her.
Bazine had been rude to Rey and her friends in school. Once when Rey accidently brushed by her in the hallways, she had said "Eww don't get near me you filthy, dirty scavenger girl. I feel dirty just being around you. Go scamper back to where you came from". After she had said it, Bazine and her friends broke out in hysterical giggles after they noticed the tears flowing from Rey's eyes.
Rey had done her best to ignore Bazine after that. She had heard rumors about her dating the most popular guys in school. The type of guys that had power and influence. Once Bazine graduated, Rey tried to forget about her and had been successful at putting her out of her mind.
Until now, until Ben had dashed her hopes of him ever reciprocating her feelings for her and choosing to marry that banshee. He hadn't even had the decency to mention to Rey that he was dating her.
She had confessed to Ben back in high school when Bazine was so terrible to her and her friends what Bazine has said about her. She told him what she had called her. He knew that Rey despised Bazine. He knew that she was a bully. Yet, he was still choosing to spend his life with a person that was so awful to Rey in the past.
"I'm transferring to Osseriton U in the fall for my junior year. Right now I'm at the local community college. I'm studying business administration.", she told Finn, pushing aside thoughts of Ben Solor from her mind.
"No kidding, me too. Its really a great program. Let me get your number and maybe we can meet up for coffee at the campus. I'd be happy to give you a tour of the campus before you start " , Finn offered.
Ben had also attended that University and taught a few night courses there. Him teaching there was the main reason that she had applied to that particular school in the first place. She hoped to be closer to him, to see him more often. She had pictured herself getting coffee with Ben frequently at the quaint coffee shop that was on the edge of the campus.
Coffee dates on campus certainly weren't going to happen anymore, not with Ben anyways.
Finn smiled at Rey. He looked at her like she was the only woman in the room, despite there being several other women sitting at the bar and waitresses serving patrons in the dining room area.
Rey never had considered herself someone that would stop traffic when she walked outside. She didn't go out of her way to make herself more attractive. She didn't wear makeup; she often didn't bother to style her hair. She wore it in three neat buns on her head and hadn't changed up this hairstyle in years. She didn't wear form fitting or revealing clothing as she wanted to be practical and not feel uncomfortable at work or school. A comfortable pair of jeans and a cotton short sleeved, scoop neck top were her go tos on most days.
She realized at that moment that if she stood side by side next to Bazine, she would just appear plain. Bazine with her sophisticated clothes and perfectly coifed hair would surely outshine her. She had believed that Ben didn't mind that way that she dressed, the way she wore her hair. She had never compared herself to another woman while she was in his presence. It was just him and her in a little , secure bubble. When they had together, they wete in their own world.
With Ben's rejection of her, that bubble had burst and she was trying not to cry in front of Finn.
Rey bit her lip and cleared her throat. Finn seemed like a nice guy. Someone who she could tell her troubles to. He apprared to be someone who would listen to her feelings without judging her.
"You just look sad, Rey. Why would a beautiful girl be so sad?" Finn asked.
Rey was caught off guard by Finn's question. She hadn't realized that she must have been staring out the window, lost in thought. She contemplated about telling Finn about Ben.
"I was in love with a man that I thought also loved me but, it turns out that I was wrong and he didn't love me back. I just had a stupid crush on him. Now he's getting married. I thought I knew him, I thought that we told each other everything and I didn't even know that he was dating anyone. His news of the engagement just blindsided me.", Rey explained, choking back tears.
She straightened up her shoulders and wiped the tears from her eyes. She had just met Finn and realized that she must be leaving a great first impression on him, falling apart over another man after Finn called her beautiful.
Finn shook his head and playfully smiled at her. " Oh come on now, that man must be out of his mind. If you were mine, I would never let you go", he stated.
Rey glanced down at the ground and then slowly looked back up at Finn. "He never belonged to me in the first place; I just had this crazy idea in my head that we were meant to be together since I was a teenager. I'm ready to move on now though and stop daydreaming about being with a man that doesn't want to be with me", she said, her voice barely above a whisper.
It was at that moment she heard someone clear their throat. She glanced past Finn's shoulder and noticed that Ben was standing about seven feet behind Finn to his left.
He was staring at her. Rey wasn't able to discern the look on his face. His eyes beamed ferocity in them but his mouth was twisted in a grimace as if he was in severe pain.
Rey wasn't sure how long he had been standing there. She wasn't sure how much of her conversation with Finn he had heard. He moved forwards towards her so that they were only separated by the wooden bar.
He grimaced at her and gestured with his head towards the back hallway area that led to the bathrooms as well as to Maz's office.
Rey looked back at Finn who nodded at her, knowingly. He obviously sensed that the man standing in front of Rey was the man that she had conveyed had caused her heart to ache. The man that she loved but didn't love her back. Finn frowned and looked from Rey to Ben but started to back up towards the tables in the dining room area.
Rey slumped her shoulders forward. She wasn't ready to have a conversation with Ben right now. He had left her a message indicating that he was coming to find her. She knew that he'd follow through on that threat. She wasn't exactly hiding as she was still in plain sight, working at Maz's Cantina. She just wasn't staying anywhere in the vicinity of him or his family any longer.
She followed him into the office and he closed the door behind her. She sunk down on the love seat that was in the corner of the small office. She curled her knees up on the couch and wrapped her arms around her knees. She put her head down, looking straight down at her knees. She quietly allowed the tears she was trying to keep in to flow down freely.
"Please look at me Rey, I want to see your eyes", Ben pleaded. He moved closer to Rey until his feet were standing flush with the couch. He leaned down and placed two of his long, lean fingers under her chin and brought her face up. Tears stained her cheeks and her eyes were red.
"Rey, I never meant to hurt you. You mean so much to me. You've been my biggest supporter throughout the years and I consider you one of my closest friends. You are smart, attractive and know how to make me laugh. Your friendship means everything to me and I don't know what I'd do if I lost that, if I lost you in my life", Ben says, his voice is unsteady and he speaks in a low, soft tone.
"I don't want to be your friend, Ben. I am in love with you. You wouldn't even let me say the words to you the other night but you know it's true. I had silly schoolgirl fantasies about us running away together and getting married one day. These were ridiculous dreams and I need to face reality," Rey explained. Her voice was shaking and she couldn't control her sobs. The tears continued to flow.
"Rey, you know I care about you. It was never my intention to make you feel bad for expressing your feelings. More than anything, I want to see you smile again at me. I want to see you happy. I want you to be in love with the man that you deserve to be with and in another lifetime that would be me", he stuttered out.
Rey sniffled and dried her eyes with the back of her hand.
"You just aren't in love with me, you are in love with Bazine", she chokes out.
"I wish I could explain it all to you, make you understand why it has to be this way", Ben tells her.
Rey had heard enough. Ben wasn't making any sense to her and his words were just cutting into her heart the more he spoke. She stood up and started to walk towards the office door. "I don't want to talk to you any more Ben, please leave. I just want to be alone", Rey pleads.
Ben narrowed his eyes and shook his head, "It didn't look like you were alone when I came in"
Rey gasped at his words. If she didn't know better she would have thought he sounded jealous.
She reached towards the door knob. Ben stepped towards her, grabbed her arm and pulled her body into his. His arms were wrapped around her tightly and she could hear his heart beating fast. She felt his hot breath on her neck and his head is buried in her hair. He planted a soft kiss on the top of her head.
"Please Rey, please forgive me, I do have love for you." he said, mumbling into her hair.
Rey felt as though his arms were burning her flesh and she shivered as she felt him pulling her closer into his chest. She pried his arms off of her and planted both of her palms firmly against his chest and shoved him away.
She sniffled and felt her heart aching as he made his declaration.
"I know that you have love for me Ben but you aren't in love with me. I don't want to have to think of you and Bazine together and experience heartbreak from seeing you in eachothers presence Just leave. Go back to Bazine and start planning your wedding. Time will pass and you'll forget all about me, about us. I can move on with my life. And you can move on with yours", she cried out.
Rey flung open the door and walked out into the hallway leaving Ben standing alone.
She took a few steps towards the bar and then turned around to look back at him. He had an expression of being stunned written upon his face but he bit his lower lip gave a glance in her direction and walked past her, straight to the front entrance. He pries open the door and doesn't look back at her as he left.
When Rey walked back to the bar she sees that Finn is still sitting at a barstool. He stared at her as she wiped away an errant tear from her cheek.
"I have to get going Rey. It was really nice to meet you. Again, I'd really love to get your number so we can continue this conversation. The offer still stands for a personal campus tour", Finn said . He smiled at her and Rey thought his smile was sincere and charming.
She wrote her number on a slip of paper and handed it to him. "I would love that, Finn", she replied. She watched him leave the bar. He turned to look at her as he opened the back exit door and smiled at her before walking out.