It was another drowsy afternoon. The regiment lounged around the common area, sprawled across couches or gambling with playing cards for dinner rolls.
Mikasa and Karma were fine tuning long-unused ODM gear, trying to stay productive.
"I hate being on standby…" Karma said. She sharpened a blade, wishing that she were using it in combat instead of handling it like a candlestick.
"Now we know how the MPs feel," Mikasa said through a shield of dark bangs.
"Is there a problem?" The voice pumped Karma's veins with ice water.
She and Mikasa instantly rose to attention, saluting Captain Levi with a fist clasped to their breasts. "No, Captain," they said.
"If you're so desperate for entertainment, you can find solace in the stables. The horses are sure to need cleaning up after." Karma guessed that this was Levi's idea of snark. She could never quite read him.
"No, Captain."
"Then I suggest you graciously return to standby. We will not tolerate complaints. As you were."
He swept by the still-saluting girls, evaluating the rest of the regiment. The couch-loungers and gamblers straightened as he passed. Karma fought the urge to stick her tongue out once his back was turned, but had enough sense to keep it lodged between her teeth.
A few tense moments after the door closed behind him, the regiment relaxed like a deflated balloon.
"The nerve of that guy." Karma dropped back into her seat and scooped up her gear.
He always made her so flustered, like her weaknesses were under a magnifying glass. If she didn't fight hard enough, he'd call her out. If she disobeyed a command to act on a gut feeling, even if it saved lives, she was bound to hear about it. If she didn't do standby—AKA nothing—well enough, somehow even that deserved reprimand.
A break every now and again was welcomed by all of the Scouts. They fought for peace. They fought to end fighting. But after reclaiming Wall Maria, most of the Titans had been eliminated and the Scout Regiment had been rebuilt to nearly two hundred strong. Thus, the standby orders, which were getting old.
And there was a stark difference between standby and peace.
"Karma, I know that tone," Mikasa said. "You're planning to do something stupid. Do you really want to keep winding up on Captain Levi's bad side?"
"What? All I said was Levi's got a lot of nerve." Karma tucked back a loose blonde lock.
"A lot of nerve to give you orders? He's your captain, Karma. He's just trying to keep the regiment in line."
Typical Mikasa, defending their captain. Despite her always taking his side and agreeing with his annoying reprimands, she was Karma's closest friend. And God knew she needed someone to be her voice of reason.
"Well letting us breathe a little and maybe explore beyond the walls wouldn't hurt."
"Don't tell me you're planning on sneaking out!" Mikasa kept her voice low as though Captain Levi might somehow hear from across the building.
"Relax," Karma said. She detected a splotch of mud on the metal. She scrubbed at it with her fingernail, an excuse to avoid Mikasa's scrutiny.
"You didn't deny it." Mikasa bent her head to meet Karma's eyes.
"Alright, fine. I'm not planning on sneaking out…" Karma said, fiddling with the gear's mechanics. Mikasa squinted.
"Because you already have a plan?" Damn, she was good.
"Don't worry, it's a stupid plan and I'll probably get caught anyway. But I'd hate myself if I didn't at least try."
"That does make me feel better. I might let you go through with it only because you'll learn your lesson once Captain Levi catches you," Mikasa said with the shadow of a smirk.
"You promise you won't tell him?"
"I don't think I'll need to. Nothing gets past him."
The plan was stupidly simple, hence the high likelihood of getting caught: Wait for everyone to fall asleep and sneak out.
What's the worst Captain Levi could do anyway? Make her clean the stables? Put her on dish duty? At least then she'd be doing something productive. And the idea of having her captain's attention, good or bad, was always a plus.
In fact, a part of her craved that attention.
His steel gaze, sharp jaw, unworldly calm in the face of danger—all of those things made him enticing. Maybe that was to blame for her persistent disobedience. She yearned to be the receiver of that steel gaze. To see the muscles of his jaw clench in frustration. To be the crack in that calm facade.
Mikasa would think her such a fool.
But Mikasa was asleep a few beds over and wouldn't stop her from stealing a glimpse of the outside world. Or a glimpse of her captain's vexation. Either way, it would be well worth the hours of sleep sacrificed. She could catch up tomorrow during "standby" anyway.
Her feet grazed the stone floor as silent as a sheet of paper. The sliver of moonlight spilling through the windows was enough to guide her to the door. She pulled it open with a sharp creak and waited a heart-throbbing moment for her plan to fall apart. But no one stirred.
She was passing the captain's quarters when she was struck with an odd desire to poke her head in. To see the room where her regiment's leader slept and lived. Where he strategized and conjured punishments to shape-up his more disobedient soldiers. Like Karma.
Granted, she was a good soldier. She fought hard and had more kills and assists than even Mikasa. But she also had a mind of her own, which tended to lead her into trouble as it likely was right now. Despite the warning signs in her brain, the adrenaline pumping in her system urged her forward.
Just before reaching the main doors, Karma spotted some of the ODM gear she and Mikasa had fine-tuned. It would be wise to bring it. In fact, not bringing it to a venture beyond the walls, no matter how short, was just foolish. But the region had been so quiet and Titan-free that Karma didn't see the need. And the added danger of being without her gear's protection made sneaking out seem like an even greater challenge—a greater thrill.
Besides, against a vegetable-brained Titan, she could confidently hold her own.
But the real thrill was imagining what Captain Levi would think if he caught her sneaking out without any protection. Would he be impressed? Angry?
She could picture his rage—eyes burning like fiery coals. The hard flex of his jaw. Would he grip her shoulders and shake her until she trembled? Would his composure crumble like chiseled stone? If so, what lay beneath?
Her bare feet touched dewy grass. Cicadas and crickets buzzed and sang around her and the damp summer air blanketed her skin. The wall ahead towered so high it grazed the moon.
While some would be hesitant, Karma practically skipped toward Wall Maria, which had long-since been reclaimed for humanity. For her, it wasn't a symbol of looming danger but of promising freedom. Just beyond the wall lay a world only the Scouts were permitted to see. It was her true world. Her sanctuary. And every battle, every Titan slain, was one step closer to fully reclaiming it.
The gate was her only obstacle, but, being a Scout, she was entrusted with the unlocking mechanism. Slowly and quietly, she raised it a fraction then ducked into the real world.
The music of the night swelled as she breached the wall. Croaking frogs played bass, harmonizing with the chirping insects. A swarm of fireflies greeted her, winking as they passed. The landscape was natural and overgrown, seemingly untouched by humans and Titans alike.
Her feet danced through swaying fields of weeds and wildflowers, arms stretched toward the sky, embracing it. She pranced to the trees, climbing rough bark to gain a better vantage point of her sanctuary. From high up in the pines, the night was still and calm. Something akin to true peace.
Which is why the Titan attack caught her so off-guard.