"Soldiers, we have news of a Titan sighting just beyond Wall Maria."
Captain Levi stood stoically before the regiment, hands clasped behind his back. The soldiers saluted their attention, Karma in the second row. Her back was sticky with sweat, but her face did not betray her nerves.
Was Captain Levi going to announce her expedition beyond the wall to the whole regiment? Tell everyone how foolish she was for not bringing her gear? How close she'd come to being eaten? Everyone would think her weak.
Shoving that pride-shattering fear aside, she mirrored Levi's calm.
"Within the hour, we will deploy a team of soldiers to scout the area for more Titans. If your name is called, you are to report to Commander Hange."
Karma knew, like her, every soldier was itching and dreading to have their name called. An expedition beyond the walls meant a chance to escape, to fight. But it also meant certain death. The names passing Captain Levi's lips were not guaranteed a safe return.
Karma was omitted from the list.
She was one of the regiment's best soldiers. Was Levi actually serious about that "standby" crap? How was she supposed to redeem herself from last night if she was stuck behind the walls?
Upon dismissal, the regiment erupted into a buzz of nervous chatter.
"A Titan sighting?" Mikasa said, eyes suddenly widening. "Karma, please tell me you didn't do something stupid last night."
Karma nibbled her lip, unsure what to say. Mikasa of all people deserved to know the truth—even if it was embarrassing. Besides, Karma never could get away with lying around her sharp-witted friend. The truth was bound to reveal itself.
"If I tell you everything you have to promise not to kill me," Karma said, tugging Mikasa out of earshot of the other soldiers.
"Apparently you're lucky to be alive as it is," Mikasa said. "You snuck out past the walls didn't you? And fought a Titan on your own?"
"Well—" Karma wished that was her story. "I sort of didn't bring my ODM gear."
"Because you're suicidal?!" Mikasa's charcoal eyes narrowed. "How did you survive a Titan attack without gear? That's impossible."
"Unless you have a knight in shining armor to rescue you." Karma gave a limp shrug.
Mikasa didn't even need to ask who. "Captain Levi caught you sneaking out and saved you."
"Yeah, and there's more…"
Karma cast anxious eyes around the common room. Captain Levi was still there, chatting with a fellow commander about strategies and attack formations. The risk of him or anyone overhearing her confession was enough for her to pull Mikasa to the women's washroom down the hall.
"What's up? You look freaked out. Don't worry—it's just us in here," Mikasa said as Karma peeked under stalls and behind shower curtains.
Karma took a deep breath, remembering the events of the previous night. The way she felt around her captain. The sudsy fantasy that invaded last night's dreams; Captain Levi's fingers gliding across her wet skin, eyes clouded with desire…
"I think I have feelings for Levi?" She may as well have confessed to murder by the horror scrawled on Mikasa's face.
"Feelings? For Captain Levi?!" Mikasa dragged a hand down her face. "You're crazier than I thought."
"It's probably just shock from the Titan attack. I'm sure it doesn't mean anything."
"No, you definitely like him. It makes perfect sense now—why you're always disobeying him. You want his attention." Mikasa shook her head. "I don't know how I didn't see it before."
"I don't care about his attention. I just have a mind of my own, that's all."
"Then tell me you aren't planning on sneaking out with the deployed troops to get back at him."
Dammit, how did she know?
"If I sneak out with the regiment it's only for humanity's sake. It has nothing to do with getting back at Captain Levi."
"It's difficult to be the voice of reason for someone who doesn't want to listen to reason. You know that, right?" Mikasa said, hand on Karma's shoulder.
"Yeah, I know…"
"Out of sheer obligation I'm going to tell you that this is a stupid idea and you should stay on standby. I don't expect you to listen, but here's hoping that Titan knocked some sense into you." There was the ghost of a smile in Mikasa's eyes—as much as she hated Karma's antics, they were also part of her charm.
"Of course it didn't." Karma mirrored her smile.
"Just promise me you'll come back alive. It would get so dull around here if anything happened to you."
Though she'd said it lightheartedly, Karma knew Mikasa meant it. She pulled her into a hug. "I promise. But I need your help."
"I know what you're plotting." Captain Levi was bent level to Karma's ear.
She was seated beside Mikasa in the common room amongst the rest of the straggling regiment, fine-tuning ODM gear as though everything were peachy. As though she weren't planning to sneak off with the departing soldiers in a few minutes to redeem herself.
"Whatever do you mean, Captain?" Karma said. "I've just been on standby, as you ordered."
"I'm not an idiot. I'm having Armin keep an eye on you."
"You assigned a well-equipped and fully-trained soldier with Colossal Titan abilities to watch me do nothing?" Karma was smirking. "Sounds like a lot of effort just to keep me out of trouble."
"You can't be trusted to follow orders." The heat of his breath on her ear was thrilling. She imagined his head inching closer, his teeth grazing her earlobe.
"I'm sure even I couldn't screw up standby."
"You've proved me wrong before. This is your last warning, soldier."
With that, Captain Levi departed to lead the regiment. Moments later, the rumble of hundreds of horse hooves pattered toward the barricading wall.
From across the room, a blond-headed soldier studied Karma, trying to be inconspicuous. Armin—was that all? One measly, gullible soldier? Captain Levi made this almost too easy. It was like he wanted her to rebel.
Karma slowly counted to a hundred in her mind, then whispered, "Okay, Mikasa."
Mikasa stood and left the room, slinging her ODM gear onto her shoulder as though she merely planned to finish her work somewhere else. On the way, she would pass their quarters and snag a green cloak.
A few minutes later, Karma shrugged into her brown cadet jacket and tucked her hair beneath a cap. "I need to visit the lady's room. I think it's my time of the month," she said to herself, but loud enough for Armin to overhear.
She'd hoped mentioning something as intimate as her period would deter the soldier from following her, but he was determined to fulfill his duty. He watched her leave the room, then shadowed her down the stone corridor, ten paces behind.
Surely, he wasn't dedicated enough to follow her into the washroom? But she was wrong. He hung by the doorway, poking his head inside.
"Armin, what are you doing? This is the lady's room."
"Captain Levi said I was to make sure that you—"
"Ugh, whatever. You can watch the stall door if you like. But please, don't feel the need to come to the toilet with me." She feigned an eyeroll and walked into the first unlocked stall.
Mikasa was inside with ODM gear and a green cloak, standing on the toilet to hide her feet from Armin's view. Quickly, they swapped clothes and traded places so that Karma was standing on the toilet seat.
"Honestly, Armin, I can't believe you don't trust me," she said, giving Mikasa a nod.
"Good luck," Mikasa whispered. Despite the slight height difference, with the cadet jacket and tucked-back hair, Mikasa could pass as Karma from behind.
Karma knew the ruse would only buy her a couple minutes, but she was hoping that by that point Armin wouldn't be able to track her down without violating his own standby orders. And he was much too obedient to do that.
When Mikasa left the stall, she didn't say a word and kept her head bent low as she washed her hands and brushed past Armin.
"Sorry, Karma," he mumbled, tailing her out of the bathroom.
Karma waited until their footsteps died down the corridor. With ODM gear strapped on and the green cloak whispering against her, she glided down the hallway and to the courtyard, remembering Levi's comment about her stealthiness being akin to an elephant.
If that were true, there was no way she would have made it to the horse stables and saddled up without being caught. Let alone breached the walls.
And yet, she thought with a grin as she plowed her steed to freedom, here I am.