Thank you for the reviews.

And Merry Christmas everyone.

Not that chapter that I thought I would be posting this Christmas morning but I don't quite think this day is going to go as badly as it could have done...

Chapter Fourteen
Monday 14th December

Eddie's task of the day was to look after Rachel the best that he could. He had to make sure that she ate and drank and if it seemed like it was overwhelming her, to take her into his arms and refuse to let go until it seemed like she was calmer.

All without knocking Max out.

That was probably going to be the hardest part of the day. But he would do it. Because he knew that it would only cause more problems than it would solve.

And Rachel was quiet that morning.

She hadn't argued when he put a plate of toast in front of her that morning, giving her usual argument that she doesn't do breakfast. She hadn't argued when he made her tea instead of coffee (with her trying to keep a hold of the one cup they had agreed that she could have a day). She had given her input at the senior management meeting but it had been the bare minimum.

And when their fictitious appointment was brought up, Eddie lied again and said that it had been moved to the end of the day, hoping that it would rile Max up. He felt like it did and that gave him a little boost.

It was after the meeting, when Max had stormed off to do something and Eddie found himself walking with Kim that he knew that Kim had seen it as well.

"Is she okay?" Kim asked.

"The short answer is no," Eddie said.

"And the long answer? Is it the thing that she can't tell me?"

He nodded. "But if you want to know, she has said that I can tell you."

"Just… do I have to police Max?"

"Yes." Eddie stepped into her office when they reached it and he knew that he couldn't really leave it at that. "You know you said that she acted strangely after you told her and Max about what was happening with Gina Davies."

"Oh no. Oh, what is it?"

"Today is the 31st anniversary of Rachel's mother's death."

He knew that the look on Kim's face was because she was trying to work out how old Rachel had been by the way that he had said it. It was why he had said it that way. Because he hated saying that Rachel was eight when she lost her mum.

"She was eight when she died?" Kim said.

Eddie nodded. "We went down to London at the weekend. Melissa, Rachel's sister, had moved down there and she had found their mum's grave. It's been the first time in… 20 odd years that both of them have visited the grave. It was strange to meet my future mother-in-law in that way."

"And I just dumped Gina Davis on her. How did she die?"

"She took her own life. Rachel had mumbled about a cancer diagnosis when she told me but I didn't ask more about it."

"Dear God."

"Can you see why we didn't want the meeting today?"

Kim nodded and Eddie was sure that she was still reeling from what he had told her. So he gave her the time to properly process it. It was a lot. And it always came back to the point of how young Rachel was at the time. And he hadn't touched on her father yet.

"Rachel and Melissa. They didn't have the best upbringing. They remember things a little differently. I do think that Melissa is seeing what… Rachel went through at the hands of… their dad." Eddie swallowed. "I also met him at the weekend. Only he is actually still kicking about."

"So she is going through it today?" Kim said.

"I need Max to be as far away from her as possible. I need him not to create problems where there aren't any. I need her to be as stress-free from work as possible on a day that is the most stressful for her. The paperwork is fine. She can drown herself in that if she remembers to drink and eat but… I can't have another week like the last couple."

Kim nodded. "Understood. I'll try and keep him away. I have a couple of things that I want to go over with him anyway."

"And try to keep him out of Philip's way as well. As much as Philip tries to tell me that it doesn't affect him, he has watched how it has affected his mum and auntie over the years. Melissa used to drink her way through it and Rachel worked her way. So much so that he was telling me that some mornings he would go into the kitchen for breakfast and find Rachel exactly where he had left her the night before, still working. He has seen grief being dealt with in the worst ways."

Eddie knew that he could leave things at that. That Kim understood enough to help him out. For them to actually be a team for once. Rachel was both their top priority.

And that was the way it should be.

Rachel felt like she knew that Kim knew when she placed the cup of tea down on her desk. She hadn't been the best at drinking the drinks that had been put in front of her but Kim always seemed to make the drink the right temperature to drink straight away, meaning that Rachel did pick it up to take a small break that she felt Kim was hinting at.

"You know… I am sorry, Rachel. I knew… I did mean what I said. And I shouldn't have. I was being sensitive with the whole thing until I wasn't." Kim said.

"It's fine, Kim. I'm not going to lie. If there is one person who needs to do a lot of apologising, I think it's me. I'm still wondering how I can make things up to Eddie." She paused for a moment. "And I refused to tell you. I don't know how easy it is to guess."

"I didn't guess it."

"Maybe because you didn't want to try to guess it."

"That is true but sometimes you can't stop yourself from thinking."

"Well, I've tried to stop myself from thinking. About quite a few things. I think the main one being what type of mother I am going to be. Mainly because… I don't think I ever saw my mum in the way that she wanted to be."

Rachel did know, or later understood, the pressures that her mum had been under at the time. She was sure that she didn't want to be the parent that she had been forced to become. And it was what she saw in other struggling parents. A person who didn't have the means to be what they wanted to be. It was why she wanted to turn around families, not just her students.

"Ah, Rachel," Max said as he entered the office.

"Max. I was just going to come and find you." Kim said.

"Were you?"

"Yes. I have a few things that we need to discuss."

"Well… I wanted to talk to Rachel about the meeting Wednesday."

"Wouldn't that be best to do tomorrow? Last minute prep and all that."

To Rachel, it was very clear that Eddie had definitely said something to Kim and it was very obvious what she was trying to do. It was putting off any dressing down that Max was going to give her before the meeting to try and knock her confidence but Rachel was glad of it. Even more so when Kim managed to drag Max out of her office.

It was another day where time had no meaning to her. Meaning that she had no idea how long it had been between Kim leaving with Max and Eddie entering her office. All she knew was that she was glad that he was there.

By the look on his face, she suspected that he thought that he might have to drag her away from the paperwork to make sure she had a break.

So if being aware and looking up at him as he reached the doorway of her office surprised him, then she knew that she had completely caught him off guard when she walked over and hugged him. Not that it took him long to wrap his arms around her once he had realised what was happening.

"I love you." Rachel said as she looked up at him. "I don't think I've told you that recently and I think I should make more of a habit of telling you more often."

They weren't the type of couple that was all lovey-dovey and were over each other all of the time. Their affections were usually given through looks and small touches. It was just the way that they were. And it was the way that suited them. Especially when they were at work. They were more intimate at home which suited Rachel's need to keep her private life as private as possible.

So she wasn't disappointed when Eddie didn't say it back. They both knew that she didn't say it to hear it back. Instead, he held her closer to him. And that was probably a better judgement of his feelings than any words.

Rachel knew the type of boy that Philip was and, therefore, the type of man that he was becoming. The thoughtfulness of the boy was astonishing bearing in mind who his mother was (even if Melissa was getting slightly better).

And she knew that he knew how hard the day would be for her.

But she didn't expect the thoughtfulness to show itself in the form of Philip being in the kitchen, cooking.

Rachel was sure that she stood there for a good few minutes, watching him as he leant over the piece of paper in front of him before he looked at the pots on the hob and checked whatever was in the oven. If she was being honest, it smelt heavenly. But she supposed any meal she didn't have to cook would smell ten times better. Mainly because she hadn't had to cook it.

But it took Philip a while to notice her standing there and she was sure that he wasn't expecting it by the way that he jumped a little.

"I thought it would be the last thing that you would want to do today," Philip said. "I've been practising with Ros to make sure that it would be edible."

She was sure that she started crying before she realised that she was. And she could see the worried look on Philip's face. It was the one thing that he wasn't used to or knew how to deal with. Tears always panicked Philip. So she made sure that she cleared the kitchen in as few steps as she could to bring him into a hug. If there was one thing she knew for sure, she knew that she was proud to say that he was her nephew. And any girl (or guy, not that it mattered to Rachel but she felt like Philip was interested in girls) would be glad to have him as a boyfriend. He would be like Eddie was to her.

"You know I love you more than words can describe." Rachel said.

"I just want to make things better for you."

"You already do."

Maybe it wasn't the response that Philip had expected. And if Rachel was being honest, it was quite a soppy thing for her to say. But she knew that she did believe it. Because Philip had been in her life and home for the last year and she couldn't help but feel like her life was better for it. She would always love him just as much as she would her daughter.

Rachel knew that she did have everything to make her life a happy one in that house. She had a man that would eventually become her husband, who she loved and knew that he loved her back. She had her nephew, who she thought would be the only person in the world who would love her for who she was. And she had her daughter, the child she had always dreamt of having but had become so doubtful whether it would happen or not.

This was her family.

And she knew that she had to be better to make sure that they all stayed together.