Dawn walked into her bedroom with her book bag full to the brim on her back and several more textbooks in her arms.

"Hey Dawn, you been at the library this whole time?" Buffy was sat waiting for Dawn on her bed, this fact caught Dawn by surprise though was too busy dropping her books on her desk to react any more than to reply, "Hey Buffy. Yep, burning the afternoon oil." She swung her book bag onto her chair. "You know what they say, study or fail at life."

"Look at you, getting down with your book nerdy self." Buffy teased with a smile.

"Hey, we didn't all graduate before the high school evaporated." Dawn rolled her eyes. "Besides, I'm actually having a lot of fun."

"Huh. School and fun, two things that never mixed for me." Buffy replied. She watched as her sister put her books down on her desk, with her pencils arranged on it in length order, and felt this wave of warmth wash over her. "Dawn, what you're doing, finishing school, doing your homework at the library... voluntarily no less..." Dawn turned to face her. "Mum would be so proud. I'm so proud." They shared a warm smile.

"Thanks Buffy." Dawn came and sat down next to her sister on the bed. "So... what's going on?"

Buffy looked away sheepishly. "Oh, right, that." She started fidgeting with a teddy bear on Dawn's bed, new and fresh seeing as the old ones got slightly swallowed by a hellmouth. "Actually," She stood up, hoping the air temp would be slightly cooler at head height, knowing it was a frivolous endeavour. "I went to see... Spike."

She looked to her sister's face to gauge her reaction. "Oh. Wow." Dawn exhaled. They had been in Europe when word got to her that Spike was alive, and Buffy had made the decision then not to see him. When Dawn asked her about it, she was a little... short with her and said that Spike was part of her Sunnydale life. It had amazed Dawn how much of Buffy's life she had put down as her Sunnydale life, packed it in a box and hid it under the metaphorical bed. She'd told Dawn that this was a new chapter, for only new things, friends excluding, and she seemed to be pretty happy about it. If anyone asked her though, Dawn never quite bought it. "I thought..."

"I know. Me too." Buffy smiled pathetically and sat back down next to Dawn.

"How did it go?" Dawn asked. She had never quite made her mind up when it came to whether she supported her sister's relationship with Spike or not. On one hand, he had a soul and saved the world. On the other, all of Giles' very vocal concerns about their relationship always rang true.

"It... went." Buffy nodded. "It was hard. He was kinda angry about the whole didn't come to see him thing. But it was good."

Dawn went silent. "I get that. What made you decide to finally do it?"

Buffy stared at the floor and took a deep breath in. "Dawn, I'm not an idiot. I know that there can't be a future with Spike, much like Angel before him we can all agree 'How would that even work?'. I made the decision not to see him over the summer because when I found out he was alive... I froze. I panicked. He died, Dawn. There was no decision to be made, no hard conversations, it was just... over. Death is such an easy out. Suddenly, he's back, and he wants to see me, and what does that mean? What does that mean for us, for me?"

Dawn never liked to see Buffy rambling, it was never a good sign. "What does it mean then?"

Buffy exhaled, choosing her words carefully. She turned to Dawn, "I don't know. But Dawn... Ever since I found out he was alive... my heart... hurts. Everyday I've felt it. Everyday I've ignored it, thinking it would go away, like it eventually did with Angel. I've hoped... but it hasn't, it didn't. So I had to see him."

Dawn nodded and threaded her arm under Buffy's and leant her head against her sister's shoulder. "Men are dumb."

Buffy laughed, wiping a tear from her eye. "You are young but wise."

Dawn looked up to her. "So, are you gonna see him again?"

Buffy nodded. "Tomorrow. We've got things... we need to talk."

"Everyone's favourite sentence." Dawn smiled. "Where is he?"

"Back in London. It was rainy there today." Buffy smiled, for a moment she was back in his apartment, in his arms...

"Thank god for Willow's transporter spell, that would have been an expensive visit." Dawn said.

"No kidding. For all that magic can do, I'm pretty psyched that I'll never have to fly coach again." Buffy smiled, and kissed the top of her sister's head.