"Hey," Spike's velvety voice gently woke her, she groaned slowly without opening her eyes. The morning light was out there, but she wasn't ready for it. "Buffy."
"Not ready for awakeness yet, too… comfy…" She nuzzled into his chest; it was cold and refreshing. Most women would undoubtedly enjoy warm skin, but personally she'd found human skin sticky in its morning warmth; Spike's skin was like the cool side of the pillow.
"You don't have to move, love. I've just… I need to tell you something." Spike almost whispered. They had decided to postpone their first date after Angel killed the mood last night, or at least that is what Spike said; he neglected to mention the extent of it.
Buffy nodded, her eyes still closed, her arm draped over him.
"Have you heard of a Morag demon?" Spike asked.
Buffy's eyes opened and looked at him quizzically. "Ok, your pillow talk needs some serious work."
Spike smiled. "I'll take that as a no."
"Spike, I don't want to talk about demons right now." Buffy closed her eyes again and tried to recapture the moments of peace beforehand.
"Ok, let me put it this way." Spike scooted down into the bed so that when Buffy opened her eyes, she would be looking directly in his. "What if we could be normal?"
Buffy snorted. "Wouldn't that be something."
"I'm serious. If I wasn't a vampire, if I was human…" Now Buffy's eyes were open, and staring into his, "Could we have a life together?"
"What?" Buffy scooted up to sitting in the bed, Spike following. "Spike, what are you…?"
"Morag demons. Their blood has the ability to make me human." The words tumbled out of Spike's mouth, slowly and in a haze.
"Human? Why… why haven't I heard of this before?" Buffy asked him, grasping for her brain to make sense of the million scenarios going through her head.
"I don't know, love. I've just found out about it myself." Spike said, fearing the next portion of this conversation.
"Well how do you know it's legit, then? Spike, this could be a trick, or a trap, or completely unreliable." Buffy started ranting.
"It's not. It's on the level." Spike said quietly.
"How do you know? Who told you th- " Buffy began and stopped herself when she saw the look on Spike's face. "Angel. That's what he told you last night."
Spike remained silent as Buffy processed. Spike feared the moment she would leap out of bed, go to Angel and grill him for why he never thought to become human for her, that she would choose Angel if he suddenly became a viable option, that Spike was what he completely feared: a placeholder for Angel. "So the Morag demon bleeds on you and you just… become human?"
"That's what I'm led to believe." Spike confirmed.
Spike watched Buffy as her mind whirred with the possibilities. "Would it hurt?" Spike didn't know how to answer. "Is it safe?" Buffy asked, the concern in her eyes touched Spike more than she would ever know. "Because if there's even a chance it could hurt you…"
"It's safe, love. And it's loophole free. And it's there for us, as an option…" Spike trailed off.
Buffy looked at him. "Is that something you would want?"
Spike took a nervous breath. "It's something you want." Buffy smiled warmly and brought her hand up to his cheek. She felt safe, she felt looked after, and mostly she felt loved. Here was this man, this man who went to hell and back - figuratively - for his soul to love her, and to hell and back - literally - to save her and the world. And now here he was, once again, risking everything to be with her as a human.
"I want to be with you." Buffy kissed him. "In whatever way I can get you."
"And I want to be with you, but in a way where you can keep me." Spike shifted in the bed, to be face on more comfortably. "Buffy, like this… I won't age." Buffy looked down sadly, he'd said it, he'd said the thing that burst the bubble. He raised her chin with his finger, "But love, as a human, we can grow old together."
"What?" Buffy smiled teasingly, "You won't love me when I'm old and gross if you're not as well?"
Spike smiled. "Probably not." He shrugged jokingly. "But why risk it?"
Buffy took a breath. "Spike, this is… big. Life changing big. You'd be giving up… are you sure I'm worth it?"
Spike laughed incredulously. "I have a hunch you are." Buffy smiled self-consciously. "But the real question here is, am I worth it to you?"
Buffy felt a swelling in her chest and lunged at him, her lips colliding with his, her tongue massaging his, and her body pulling him hungrily towards her; he responded in kind, she felt how he needed her, wanted her. She went to sleep last night in reality and had woken up into a fantasy, she could hardly believe that this option was real, that she could have a life, a real life, with the man that she loved. In one conversation, her whole life projection with Spike changed, as his had with her, and suddenly, she had choices in front of her she'd never had before.