Haki stared up at the moon with a heavy frown on her face. Her stomach continued to twist in knots as the memories of the day replayed in her mind again and again. The memory of how her demon blood boiled left her feeling both uncomfortable and tired. Her hands gripped the railing in front of her.
"Women that get jealous a lot are not easy to love."
Hiskaya's words echoed in Haki's mind and brought tears to her eyes. She closed her purple eyes and sighed deeply.
Though the words had been said in jest, Haki knew that there was an element of truth to them. She and Hiskaya may have bound their lives together, but that didn't guarantee love. The love that Haki felt for Hiskaya was the only thing that truly comforted her. Whenever Haki feared the darkness that lay dormant within her, a mere smile from Hiskaya was normally enough to chase those fears away. But without that love?
Without that love, Haki feared that her steps would eternally be shrouded in shadow.
Sniffing, Haki wiped the tears from her eyes.
"Haki, are you crying?"
Surprised, Haki spun around. Her father was standing in the doorway. His purple eyes were narrowed in concern. His horns were gone and his body was lean, telling Haki that he had quelled his demon blood for the evening.
"Hey, Dad," Haki said sadly. "How was your day?"
Satan gave her a loving smile. "You're changing the subject," he teased. He walked over to her and pulled her in a tight, comforting hug. "Come on, tell your old man what's going on. I can sense that your blood is restless. What happened?"
Haki smiled and hugged her dad back. "It's just…I got jealous," she admitted. "And that got my emotions twisting. I thought that having a spar would get me refocused and help me control my emotions again."
"Were you impulsively attacking?" Satan asked gently.
Ashamed, Haki buried her head into her dad's strong chest. "Not at first," she said softly. "I had control. But then…" Hiskaya's words echoed in Haki's mind again and brought a new wave of tears. "I was too sensitive to what was said, and I lost control. I lashed out unfairly."
Gently, her dad lifted a hand and soothingly stroked her head. "Controlling the royal bloodline is difficult, even for those who aren't overly sensitive," he assured her. "Believe me, I've had my moments."
Shaking her head, Haki pulled back. She hugged herself and smiled sadly. "Dad, I'm more sensitive than most demons," she reminded him. "I get…unsettled a lot more easily than you or Hari." Her eyes blurred with tears again. "But it's always with…"
Now her dad got it. He chuckled nervously and scratched the back of his head. "So, you got jealous of your angel?" he clarified. At her unhappy nod, he continued. "And you're worried that these emotions are making your blood restless and causing you to hurt her?"
"I know they are," Haki said miserably. "I got mad during our spar and punched her. Hard. I calmed down when we were by ourselves, but I can't get over how guilty I feel about losing control again." Now tears were trickling down her cheeks. "I don't want Hiskaya to think that I'm too difficult to be with."
Seeing her so upset had Satan frowning heavily. He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and squeezed it gently while Haki got herself under control.
Though Haki loved her family deeply, she hated being a demon of the royal bloodline. They were all a bomb, just waiting to go off. And Haki's immense magical power made her more unpredictable. Had she not bound most of it during that ritual with Hiskaya, Haki feared that her wild emotions would have caused a lot more damage.
"I envy Unnie for not having these struggles," Haki said guiltily. "She always makes the restlessness look easy."
"That's because her strength lies in Demon's Body and she knows how to help quell it," her father reminded her. "Your strength comes from Demon's Spirit." His eyes grew grim. "It's a lot easier to lose your way when your spirit falters."
Fear clenched Haki's heart.
"Do you think that I'll…" the question dropped off her lips, unable to even finish it.
"I will do all in my power to protect you and your sister from that fate," Satan said firmly. He smiled. "But for now, would it comfort you to have some help with calming those swinging emotions?"
Hope blossomed in Haki's heart. "Do you know something?" she begged. "A spell? An artifact? I just…I don't want to chase her away if she realizes that I'm…unstable."
Satan fondly ruffled her hair. "Being unstable is one of the joys of the royal bloodline. We do better when we have someone strong by our sides to help calm us." He shrugged helplessly. "I do wish that you hadn't picked an angel to stand by you," he admitted. "But since she survived the merging of my mana with hers, I guess she's tougher than she looks." He gave Haki a serious look. "She can't know the full truth," he warned her. "I will not lift that restriction."
"I know," Haki said sadly. "She won't know." Her body trembled. "Not even if I become Lost."
They left the patio and made their way to the treasury. Her father dug through a jewelry chest for a few moments before he held up a small neckless with a victorious grin. Haki smiled and held her hand out for the necklace before she hesitated and pulled away.
"Will I become…evil?" she asked uncertainly. "I don't want to step further into darkness."
Her dad smiled gently. "It is just a tool for suppressing insecurities. Without those, you might be a little more aggressive though."
Haki swallowed thickly. Her nerves were beginning to get the better of her again. She could feel her blood respond to the shift of her emotions. It would start off as a warm glow through her body that would build until it became a raging inferno, just waiting for an opportunity to lash out.
Regardless of who was in her path.
She reached out and grabbed the necklace before she tied it around her neck. The nerves settled. The blood cooled. She sighed in relief. Her purple eyes gleamed.
*BREAK*
Hiskaya stared in shock as Haki walked away from her with Lee-Sol on her arm. She didn't know how long she stood there, gaping like a fool, as her mind raced faster than she could comprehend.
What had just happened?
Being surprised by Haki in the human world had instantly brought a smile to Hiskaya's face. It was as if her lover had read her mind and then appeared. But the smile quickly disappeared when Haki, wearing a knowing smirk, revealed that she wasn't actually there to spend time with her. In fact, she was on a date. With Lee-Sol.
What was going on?
It wasn't until Haki was out of sight that Hiskaya realized she was still standing in the same spot. A very large part of her wanted to run after Haki, but Haki had made it clear that she was there to spend time with Lee-Sol, not her. And as much as Hiskaya disliked it, she knew that it wasn't her place to interrupt.
Even knowing that, her footsteps felt heavy when she retreated to a secluded area before returning to Heaven.
Her feet landed on the grass of the corner of Heaven, her human clothes gone and once again replaced with her robes. She shuffled slowly to a nearby rock and sat down. For a long time, only her memories of her encounter with Haki kept her company. A heavy sigh escaped her and she leaned her cheek against her hand.
"I just don't understand, no matter how much I think about it," she murmured to herself. She frowned sadly. "Haki doesn't like going to the human world alone, so it's not surprising that she brought Lee-Sol with her. But for her to say it was a date and practically show it off?" She closed her eyes uneasily. "And she didn't even try to ask me to stay with her? That isn't like Haki at all."
When Milkia smacked her on the shoulder to get her attention, Hiskaya was almost grateful for the distraction. Even though it sent her spinning across the field from the pure strength of it. Hiskaya sat up and glared at her fellow angel.
"That was a bit much, don't you think?" she said hotly.
Milkia shrugged unapologetically. "I tried getting your attention. Not my fault you were in your own little world."
Hiskaya sat down heavily on the rock. "I'm worried about Haki," she admitted. "And I can't stop thinking about it."
"She did seem a bit different today," Milkia commented with a smirk as she sat down next to her.
"I'm glad that I'm not the only one who noticed," Hiskaya said distractedly. Then she blinked and turned to frown at Milkia. "Wait, how did you know?" she asked in curiosity.
Milkia tapped her cheek. "I figured it out when Haki gave me a kiss on the cheek earlier," she chuckled.
It was like a stone had dropped in her stomach. Hiskaya stared at Milkia, silver eyes wide and uncomprehending. "What happened?" she asked numbly. "Tell me the truth."
Now openly mocking her, Milkia stuck her tongue out. "Haki kissed me," she repeated.
Hiskaya's jaw dropped. She felt her entire body grow cold. "I told you to tell me the truth," she said in a monotone.
Milkia blinked in surprise. "Seriously? You're that surprised by it? Kind of sad, Hiskaya," she said with a frown. "It was just a peck on the cheek. Nothing more than you do to others all the time. Calm down."
But there was no calming down. Hiskaya got to her feet and started marching away. Her heart was hammering wildly in her chest and she couldn't shake the feeling that something was terribly wrong.
"Milkia, come with me," she ordered abruptly. "My Haki would never be so forward with someone, especially someone she doesn't know." She paused and glared at the stunned Milkia. "You're going with me to the human world to find her. Because of your lie, I can't stop worrying."
With a tired sigh, Milkia got to her feet. "If it's a lie, then why do you want me to join you?" she asked.
"Just come on!"
They made quick work going to the human world. Almost as soon as her feet hit the ground, Hiskaya was focusing on trying to sense Haki's magic. Her girlfriend's magic was sealed, but she was still stronger than the average devil. It was normally easy for Hiskaya to find her. But now, it was like trying to sense smoke in the wind. She knew it was there, but she couldn't pinpoint it.
"Well, where is your devil?" Milkia asked sourly as she stuffed her hands in her pockets for warmth.
Hiskaya bit her lip. "I'm not sure," she admitted. "I think she's suppressing her magic."
Milkia sighed irritably. "I thought you were this super senser when it came to magic," she complained. "I don't want to walk around aimlessly in this cold."
Glaring, Hiskaya whirled on her. "Well, we aren't leaving until we find Haki and find out what's wrong," she snapped. "Let's go."
They walked around the human city for a long time. Hiskaya jogged, desperately searching for a familiar head of long, black hair. Milkia kept up her pace easily, occasionally complaining over their excursion. Every time Hiskaya thought that they were getting closer, she felt the general direction of Haki's magic shift and she would stop abruptly. Just when Hiskaya was beginning to wonder if Haki was purposefully throwing her magic around to throw her senses off, she saw Haki standing with Lee-Sol while she talked to a young man. The pleasant smile she wore while speaking to the man made Hiskaya's blood boil.
"Ha-kiiiii!" she yelled as she sprinted towards her girlfriend.
She approached the surprised duo of Haki and Lee-Sol and then bent over while she struggled to regain her breath.
"Why are you two…going around so carefully?" she coughed out. "It was hard…to find you."
Haki's chuckle of amusement had Hiskaya's head shooting up.
"You seem to be more tired from running than from searching for me," Haki teased, her purple eyes gleaming.
Hiskaya grimaced. "That doesn't matter," she huffed. She straightened and tightly grabbed Haki's wrist. "Come with me for a moment," she ordered as she began to pull.
Though Haki followed, Hiskaya did not lessen the force on her grip.
"What's with the sudden urgency?" Haki questioned.
Stomach fluttering with nerves, Hiskaya stared straight ahead. "I don't want to be disturbed," she said shortly. "There's too many people here."
Dragging Haki along, Hiskaya headed for a secluded alleyway further down the road. All that Hiskaya cared about was getting to the bottom of Haki's strange behavior. She was so focused, that she didn't realize that she was clutching Haki's thin wrist in a death grip.
"Hiskaya, you're holding too tight," Haki commented.
"I get it," Hiskaya said distractedly as they began walking down the alley. "Just keep following me."
Then, she felt Haki's wrist pull free from her grip. "I told you that it hurts!" Haki snapped.
Surprised, Hiskaya spun around and gaped. Haki's purple eyes were narrowed at her in displeasure. She gingerly rubbed her wrist.
"This should be far enough," Haki continued coolly. "No one will hear us here. So, if you want to talk, then talk. There's no need for you to forcibly pull me along like this."
Stunned, Hiskaya stared at Haki's face. The thin frown and the displeased eyes were something that Hiskaya could not remember ever seeing.
This is not her demon emotions running away from her, Hiskaya realized, swallowing thickly. Something is wrong.
"I'm sorry," Hiskaya said softly. She took in a steadying breath. "It's just…I was concerned. You aren't acting like yourself."
Thankfully, Haki's aggressive frown melted into a thoughtful one. She put her hands in her pockets and raised a confused eyebrow. "Really? What's different about me?"
Hiskaya sniffed. "It's just," she stammered. "I feel like you're acting cold towards me," she admitted. "You normally aren't a cold person, Haki."
"So?" Haki asked simply.
Surprised, Hiskaya blinked. Then she frowned. "What do you mean 'so'?" she asked. "You aren't normally…" a sneeze escaped her before she could finish. "And Milkia told me that you…" This time, she broke off as the words were too raw for her to say.
Haki gave her a gentle smile, but the mischievous glint still did not leave her eyes.
"If you're going to say something, then say it," she said as she removed the scarf she was wearing.
"I'm trying," Hiskaya cried out. "Milkia told me that you went up to her and practically hit on her!"
Lovingly, Haki wrapped her scarf around Hiskaya's neck. "Dummy, you aren't dressed warmly enough," she teased. "You're going to get sick in this cold."
Having Haki so close always made Hiskaya's heart race. It was incredible how much love she had for the woman before her. All Hiskaya wanted to do was reach out and touch her, to assure herself that her Haki was there. But her mind would not stop telling her that something was wrong, and it made her chest tighten painfully.
"W-wait, you're distracting me," Hiskaya accused while her face flushed.
"Shush," Haki ordered. "Stay still so I can wrap this around you."
Not willing to be deterred, Hiskaya scowled up at Haki. "Milkia told me that you gave her a kiss on the cheek," she accused. "What's going on with you? Did something happen?"
Haki blinked a couple times. "I can't kiss people on the cheek?" she asked in confusion. "But, you do that all the time. Sometimes, even when I'm there."
Guilt gnawed at Hiskaya's stomach. There was truth to Haki's words. Normally, Hiskaya did it because she knew that it would get a bit of a rise out of Haki. She loved how easily Haki got flabbergasted. And Hiskaya admittedly often tried to get that response out of her girlfriend. But hearing that Haki had been the one kissing others left Hiskaya panicked. She was the only one who should be receiving kisses from Haki (and perhaps her family, though Hiskaya was reluctant to share).
"But, when I give pecks like that, it's totally different," Hiskaya defended herself, albeit weakly. "You don't normally get close to people like I do. Why are you so suddenly doing so now?"
For a few moments, Haki stared at her silently. This did nothing to soothe Hiskaya's nerves. Then, Haki sighed in annoyance.
"And here I thought I was doing the right thing," she mused as she looked away deep in thought. "Unless I'm still missing something?"
This was not helping the confusion that was gnawing away at her stomach. Hiskaya stared at Haki with wide silver eyes.
"Then something did happen?" she gasped. "Haki, what happened? You wouldn't act like this unless there was something wrong with you!"
The confusion evaporated from Haki's eyes as she turned to face her. Now she was smirking in amusement. "So, you're jealous?" she said with mirth.
"No, I'm not jealous!" Hiskaya shouted, glaring hotly at Haki. "That's not what's happening at all!"
This was not how this intervention was supposed to be. She was supposed to get Haki to fess up to what was wrong after being confronted over the kiss. But now, Haki was completely controlling this conversation. Hiskaya wasn't used to being pushed around by Haki like this. Her soft, gentle Haki. Who was absolutely adorable whenever her shy side came out.
"You keep avoiding my point," Hiskaya accused. She reached out and grabbed Haki by her coat. "If you don't tell me what's going on, then I'll kiss you, here and now!"
To her glee, a soft blush appeared on Haki's face as she stared down at Hiskaya. The glee was short lived when Haki grabbed her by her own coat and roughly shoved her against the wall behind her. Hiskaya grunted in pain at the rough treatment and stared at Haki in shock. There was no maliciousness on Haki's face, but the devilish smirk was actually more concerning.
"You think I care who sees?" Haki purred as she leaned closer. "If you wanted a kiss, then all you had to do was ask. But you don't get to complain if I get…rough."
Now the blush on Hiskaya's face was multiplied. She stammered as she tried to formulate a response while her body burned at the implication. But then her eyes drifted down Haki's neck and she realized that the dark magic she was vaguely sensing wasn't coming from Haki after all. Her silver eyes narrowed.
"Haki, what are you wearing?" she asked. "It has a strange darkness to it. I've never seen you wear it before."
After looking stunned for a second, Haki chuckled. "Your ability to sense magic is amazing," she praised. "My dad gave this to me, it's very helpful. It's meant to help suppress one's negative emotions. To help change their personality."
The very thought of Haki changing at all made Hiskaya's heart hurt. She reached out and clutched a smiling Haki's hands tightly.
"Why would you do that?" Hiskaya demanded. "And to make it sound like a good thing? Haki, you being you is more than enough."
The smile left Haki's face. "More than enough?" she repeated. "I get jealous and upset so easily. But right now, I don't feel that. I feel calm." She shrugged. "And you don't like it when I get jealous. So, I eliminated those negative emotions."
"What I like isn't the problem," Hiskaya insisted. "You shouldn't force yourself to change for anyone. Why would you think that this is a good solution?" Hiskaya glared hatefully at the necklace. "You don't need this," she said firmly as she reached out and wrapped her hand around the thin cord. She gave it a strong tug, but it wouldn't budge. "Why won't it break off?" Hiskaya gasped. "It looks so flimsy."
Haki chuckled. "Your angel magic can't break dark magic," she reminded her.
Now Hiskaya was smirking. "I think you forgot that your dad gave me some dark magic of my own."
The look of shock on Haki's face told her that she had in fact forgotten.
"Wait," Haki cried.
But it was too late. Hiskaya channeled some of that darkness into her fist and tugged. The necklace came off immediately. In an instant, Haki blinked and the coolness vanished from her purple eyes. Hiskaya beamed in triumph at the sight of her lover.
"And now you're back to normal," Hiskaya said victoriously. "Shall we kiss to celebrate?" She frowned when she saw that Haki was staring at the necklace that she was still holding, a conflicted look on her face. "Haki?"
"You shouldn't have done that," Haki whispered. She reached forward and grabbed the necklace from Hiskaya's hands. It was then that Hiskaya realized they were shaking. "You ruined the magic," she said anxiously.
Hiskaya frowned. "You don't need that stupid thing," she insisted. She smirked teasingly. "Is this because you're too nervous to ask for a kiss?" She shrugged. "I prefer you more when you're a softie. I can't tease you when you're that aggressive. You're much better this way."
"Stop it," Haki whispered as she stared at the necklace. Then she looked up and glared at her. "Stop being so stupid," Haki cried. "I did this so you would be happy, you dolt!"
Now Hiskaya was stunned into silence. She stared at Haki for a few silent moments. Then her eyes narrowed and she frowned.
"What do you mean you did it so I'd be happy?" Hiskaya snapped angrily. "When did I ever tell you to change yourself like that?" She scoffed and turned away. "You were overly familiar with others and cold to me. What would I possibly like about that?" She turned around and stared at Haki's frowning face while jabbing her finger towards her. "Don't do such useless things," she said firmly.
For a few moments, Haki just stared at her. Hiskaya saw that Haki's hands were clenched and she mentally braced herself to be hit. It happened often enough when Haki's temper got the better of her that it didn't really bother her anymore. Hiskaya tensed her muscles, like she had learned during combat training, to minimize any damage. She smirked confidently. Once Haki hit her, she knew that Haki's temper would settle and they would move on. Just like always.
"Fine."
Hiskaya frowned at the clipped tone that Haki was using.
"I'm sorry for doing such useless things," Haki whispered as she walked past Hiskaya without a second glance.
Stunned, Hiskaya stared after Haki. This wasn't how this was supposed to go. Haki was supposed to hit her, then feel guilty, then take care of her while she pretended to recover. But now, Haki was swiftly walking away from her without even looking back.
"Haki, wait!" Hiskaya cried as she rushed after her.
Because they were surrounded by humans, Hiskaya was unable to use any magic to catch up with Haki. Thanks to her long legs, Haki was already at least ten yards ahead of her. Hiskaya sped to catch up.
"Haki, let's go together," she said loudly. But Haki just ignored her and kept walking. "Haki," Hiskaya whined. "I'm sorry. Please stop walking and talk to me." Still, Haki ignored her. "Please don't be angry with me!"
For a moment, Hiskaya thought that Haki was going to lose her temper and snap. Haki stiffened and her head turned slightly. But then she turned her head and resolutely looked away. Hiskaya kept following, begging Haki to stop and talk with her. But each plea was met with silence. Eventually, Hiskaya got desperate and lunged forward to grab Haki's sleeve.
"Haki, talk to me," she begged. "I'm sorry."
To Hiskaya's surprise, there weren't any tears in Haki's eyes. Normally, any argument resulted in Haki crying at one point or another. Instead, there was weariness on Haki's face.
"Hiskaya, please just leave me alone," Haki said tiredly. "I need to think."
Those words hurt more than any punch ever could.
"Think about what?" Hiskaya gasped.
Haki pulled her sleeve free and kept walking. "That's for me to work through. Not you," she said firmly.
"Wait, Haki," Hiskaya protested, arm outstretched.
It was then that she really looked at Haki's face. Haki's purple eyes were dull and thoughtful. Like something had worn so heavily on her that all was left was emotional exhaustion. No, not exhaustion. Sad resignation.
"Haki," Hiskaya whispered to herself. What should I do? she asked herself as Haki continued to walk away.
All of her instincts told her to run after the woman she loved and hold her tight. But if something was really weighing so heavily on Haki, then maybe she really did need space.
And so, even though her very soul was screaming against her, Hiskaya turned around and walked the opposite way.
