Skidding a step on the pavement, I stop to glance at the ground. I almost slipped on a jagged crack. Absent in my way, I carry on through the greying outdoors and misty waters outside. Dark evenings and numbing air leave a frosty layer on my skin.

One last round, I know this is third time I passed by the docking bay, but I want to see it again. Standing over the edge and tasting a little of the icy seas. I miss feeling the mist across my legs and even through my uniform. This one I wear does its job to insulate me, yet I never minded the right temperature of wet and cold. Maybe not like those Northern Parliament girls or the submarines. I can be an observer of nature.

Staring over the edge, I feel my hairs on my skin stand. The throbbing on my back is there again. Becoming more frequent by the day sense I became sick. Reaching through my overcoat, I touch the tenderness of lower back. Aching, either from being inactive for so long or simply giving me pains. Tugging my shirt underneath, I have to check myself in the mirror later.

My usual torture aside, the throbbing and aching in my spine, there's a distant memory calling out to me. A warning system I thought no longer worked.

Vibrations are carried along the chilling gently breeze. Alerting me to the the slow movements, the metal machines stop when I spot them. Four small metal jaws slink around each other while heading towards my way. Floating as they are, against nature's better judgement in making gravity make sense, they hover to again before halting politely in front of me. Two heads bow and the other two swish their heads to their right side.

"You're Mainz's rigging. Good to see she let you four out."

The top two heads nod, making the same motion. Below them, the bottom peer at my like curious puppies.

"Didn't think I'd see you two again. Still holding up from the thrashing you gave me?" They nod again in unison, "Good. She wants to see me right? I'll head to her dorm then after I'm done out here."

Hovering near me, the top two shake their heads, "Okay…so she's at the pub then? I don't know if she's told you, but its not a great idea for me to drink."

I swear I can feel the bottom two roll their eyes. They try again to communicate with me.

"Ah," they turn their heads and point a certain direction, "My quarters. Alright, lead the way."

Mainz's metal serpents slink away, a head peeks back to make sure I was following it. Unlike most riggings, smaller jaws are a form of hivemind. When together, like these four, they work in unison, separated, their intelligence devolves to that of a small puppy. They are 'dogs' in a strange cosmic sort of way.

Before I even opened the door, I felt the warmth and heavy aroma of caffeine and baked goods. Due to the lack of opposable thumbs, the rigging waits patiently for me at the door. One of them rubs their head against the frame and another keeping a close eye on me. Ignoring their behavior, I swing the door wider to let them in. Latches click with the for detaching from one another, filing in until the fourth one stops. It bumps at my leg, seeing the sign, I go inside before it does and close the door behind me.

Entering my home, there's a clear liveliness and cloud of calm activity. In the living room, it's been converted into a mini art studio. Odin concentrated on a picture of a half-finished scenery of starry skies. I do have a double take at what seems to be a heavily detailed banana from my fruit bowl half covered in the corner. I wave at her, and she smiles at me. She sniffs the air and turns her head towards the kitchen.

"Thank you, boys from bringing him back," Mainz walks in, donning an apron and carrying a tray of steam confectionaries.

Her rigging, ever loyal, bow their heads. She bumps her hip into the one closest to her and they disappear back into her body. Bright particles and all passing back through and disappearing. Magical as it is, she still kept a welcoming stern gaze.

"Later than I expected," she checks the darkness outside, "Really, sir, its drizzling out there?"

"Needed to clear my mind more." I clear my throat, "A little water doesn't hurt."

"And we don't need you getting sick again," Mainz points an oven mitt at him, "I need a moment to let these sit, it will be ready soon."

"I'll go get myself washed up then, be right back."

Already in the process of taking off my soaked coat and hanging it to dry. Heading into my bedroom, I find Odin's rigging sleeping on the floor. Disarmed of their weapon attachments, the two red jaws hum gently, sounding similar to a power generator turning on. Digging through my closet, I take out a thick cotton blanket and throw it on top of them. It does not do anything; they're machines after all. Nevertheless, this does leave a warm feeling when they snuggle closer together underneath.

Arriving back at the living room, Mainz put up a big plate on the dining table. Cookies stacked on top of each other and Odin already sitting there with a glass of milk. Other desserts lay to the side, some I assume were from packages, homemade or now, the sweetness is still strong here. Dressed in simple white shirt with blue jeans, having taken off the apron she wore while working on her painting. Seeing her being so comfortable leaves an odd smile for me.

Coming over, I see Mainz sitting down and open chair opposite to her. A serving of cookies already set for me with my own glass of milk. One chessboard with the pieces already laid out, prepared by my supposed white-haired cruiser who beckoned me to settle down.

Blinking, I sit down and grab the first cookie I see. Warmed, it melts into my mouth and I hum in enjoyment.

"Truly," I say after taking the first bite, "Your baking skills are excellent…did you put filling into these ones?"

"Yes, marshmallow crème in the middle," She happily declares, basking in the praise I give her, "A certain cruiser taught me this recipe yesterday in fact."

"Surprise me."

"Eugen, she picked it up during her time as a liaison in the Eagle Union."

I hum again, swallowing the first cookie. Even as I did, I share a cheeky smirk with Mainz when I see Odin's empty plate. I'm pretty certain she scarfed down the four Mainz gave her. Wordlessly, the cruiser planted more into her plate, keeping a confectionary set nearby. The girls sure can eat a lot.

"Huh, you usually spend time with your sisters at the pub," I lean over to peek at the calendar in the kitchen, "I mean, cookies and a warm house isn't so bad."

"Well," she begins, prompting for Odin to scoot closer, "We've noticed you've been quite down lately. Odin and I wanted to make sure you were alright."

Third cookie halfway to my mouth, I nearly drop it, "I guess I'm only tired then."

"When you don't offer to play chess after work and walk aimlessly for hours, I assume you mean 'haggard'," Odin chimes in, once more going after what I estimate is an eighth cookie, "Sir, is this having to do with Zeppelin and Strasser?"

"Odin!" Mainz snaps at her. Her quick change in demeanor can only get a blinking surprise from me, being taken by the sweet taste of chocolate. Although, Odin takes it very well, shrugging as if the reaction she received is warranted.

"What, someone had to bring it up," she chews and swallows, "Sir, Rene, we're just concerned for you. Is this having to do with your…life from before?"

Oh, I see what this is.

"This, this is an intervention, isn't it?" I putter out, rubbing my hands together, "Yes…my mood as of late hasn't been the best."

I grab a cookie and break it into two, "I am worried about Graf Zeppelin and Strasser. I don't know everything, and for my own benefit, I think Weser is right. I do need to stay out of it. I just…I just see a lot of myself with Jörmungandr and I in those two."

"The serpent?" Odin questions, both she and Mainz share a confused look, "I think I, or we, are lost here."

"Girls," I firmly state, glancing over at the chess, "I see you came here to comfort me and to avail me of my worries. I will let you do that. Unfortunately for you, I'm still on edge. Chess, it soothes me. It helps me. If either one of you win, I'll…"

What will I do? What can I do? I already promised them I would stop. Stop the fighting, the desperate charges into the unknown, the constant sorties. I already said I'll become their commander, their Kommadant, that I will remain once more to guide and lead them. I don't know what else I can give besides a mind that is willing and a man with only chess left to his victories.

"Sir…" Mainz reaches over and touches my shaking hand, "Rene?"

I shake my head. I want something out of this. Whatever it may be, another battle, a friendly skirmish, or a challenge? Strasser gave me the last one yesterday, still left me in a strange funk.

"If you want my answer, want to know what's wrong, fine. I'll tell you…if only one of you, and I believe its Mainz, can defeat me here."

"We don't have to-"

"Mainz, remember when you asked me to test you," I interrupt her, breathing a little heavily. Keeping a growing anxiety from throwing up, "You asked me to challenge you, to see you deserve this chance at life."

"…to prove myself." She adds.

"Correct," The mist outside has turned into a brief spout of light rain. I hum at the sight and give Mainz, who looks worried, one tired look. No reassurance, only a barren showing of what lies beneath.

She pouts, whether she understood what I wanted or sees a glimpse of it, I can't say. Converting her expression into one of pure determination. Only then does she twirl the chessboard around. Flipping to a color I didn't think she would play.

"White?"

"Strategy changes, I felt as this is necessary," Reaching over her empty plate, sips retrieve her signature mug, her smile belays nothing.

I grin from ear to ear, "I like it. I want to see what you intend to do."

"You may come to see me as an adversary in more than just combat, sir."

Reaching down, she moves a pawn forward flanking the middle. Beginning our little fight for domination in the center. Her first move being an uncommon start, I chalk it up to her being unfamiliar with beginning the first attack. An English Opening however, it is not the type I expected from anyone here.

Deciding to humor her, I set the board to a different tempo. Pulling forward the king's pawn and turning the English Opening into a-

"Reversed Sicilian?" Odin muses quietly on the side.

"Or King's English," Mainz vaguely wagging her finger, eyes never leaving the board or me.

…she's done her research. In response to my change, she reinforces her position with knights. One knight hidden behind her first pawn and another bravely sighting my pawn. I met her call to battle and set my knights forward, standing behind the pawn holding the center. Contesting the central spot with a quiet move of the king's piece, one step forward. I break it more with an Open Reversed Sicilian.

Such a move leaves my pawn open to be taken, a lamb to the slaughter. It can tilt towards her favor, and I intend to capitalize on it. Instead, she takes a different approach, she sends her queen towards the left throwing my plan into a different direction. Hesitating on my next move, I can't tell what kind of game she's wanting to play here. Move her queen forward and tear up my flanks?

I move up the rooks on my queen's side, pushing the lines to strengthen the position against their monarch. Pushing one pawn two spots over now two pieces of fodder threatening the one pawn who changed my expectations from the beginning. Meanwhile, I still hear the munching of cookies, like generals enjoying cigars, instead its humanized ships watching an old war dog. Consuming her cookies, Mainz sensing her queen's trapped – she throws a pawn forward.

Nestling a pawn right into the middle of a carefully orchestrated web of pieces, one white standing alone against two of my own. Still not wanting to take the initiative, I did the same for my other side – reinforcing it with a caveat. Putting my queen in front of my king and a bishop in front of her. Putting a wall of honor, waste, belief, and lastly – his closest confident to protect the king.

Still not entertaining an exchange to end this cold war, she aggressively flings her underdeveloped flank forward. Throwing her pawns far forward, overextending themselves. When she moves her bishop over aiming at the one guarding my queen. Sensing the climax to the game, I pushed my queen to prepare herself behind the bishop – ready to propel forward.

Following this cold war of ours, she moves a bishop over on the other side – a minor move I believe was intended to distract me. Prepared for my attack, I throw the bishop towards the line, killing the one she moved over earlier in an attempt to threaten the same piece. Reciprocating the motion, and following up the ensuing massacre, she uses her rook to take the bishop. I then send my queen forward alone. At the end of my turn, one rook and bishop in exchange for one of my own.

Mainz ends the middle's tensions, snapping the stability by taking one piece.. Nevertheless, starting a bloodbath in the middle, it is already too late as I charged my queen behind her lines.

"Check." Her king defenseless, she moves back a knight, weakening her position in the middle as pieces fall. Falling in the line of duty, the chivalrous piece is taken down. Once more leaving the king exposed and in check.

"Check." I lean back and fold my arms.

Because of my attention to back, I was too focused on the pieces capable of threatening the queen instead of the one she sent back. At some point, she managed to move her queen back. Determination in the way she scoots her king away and makes way for our queens to meet. To fight another day, I move her away back towards my depleting lines.

I clench my teeth. My situation in the middle has gone south with my control falling apart as I focused too much on moving my queen away. Meanwhile, Mainz doesn't bat an eye, staying her nerves and observing. She takes her time to move then shoot forward after a moments' contemplation. It worries me to see how her cool collected approach.

Odin on the other hand munches on what may be our last cookie.

And I watch the board clear up. What is left in the middle is in disarray. The flanks on both sides meant to support the middle are stuck in a deadlock, four pawns remaining for us both. Four who stand around and do nothing because they cannot move past the other. Rendering out pawns immobile all I have left is two rooks and queen.

Licking her wounds, Mainz musters her only rook and queen. The white king dangles openly in the frontlines, too far from the last remaining line of pawns and in danger of checkmate.

I trapped rook in a corner behind a line of the pawns. Unsure of what kind of mess I made in the middle, I'm surprised I lost control of the situation so easily. The queen should have ended things, but I'm stuck in this slogging match and Mainz is nonplussed. After my initial drive to victory, my retreat led to everything being bogged down, I move my only other piece, my queen, into a position to remove a check.

"Check."

Seeing I have removed my queen to use my rook to check her king, she places her only rook left in front. Sealing the fate of the game much to my belated dismay. I did not catch this in fact, by then, Odin stops eating her dessert and breaks us from our concentration.

"Stalemate." Odin double checks, and checks again, "I can't believe it. You both stalemated."

Seeing the result, I still could only blink. I stare at Mainz, I stare at Odin, then the bored. No coherent thought or clever quip. I just blink.

Then I break into a laugh.

Covering my mouth, I try to hide the strange feeling coming over me. It's been too long since I felt this. This feeling I sought after in a long time. It is fleeting and momentary, but I felt it. Why I'm laughing about it, I don't understand. Minding the possibly concerned looks I'm getting from the two women in front of me.

"Sir?"

I wipe my mouth, holding my chest, "Sorry, sorry. I don't mean to laugh. I'm thinking. Realizing. This, this was what I missed."

I point at the bored, "Exhilaration. That's when I faced Strasser."

"A challenge, it felt sickening to taste it again," I snort, "Jörmungandr was my brother, he was the one who used to beat me all the time in chess when I was first learning."

"…I get it." Finally recovering from my strange epiphany, Mainz moves aside her empty plate, "So you were saying earlier, you and your brother, are like Graf Zeppelin and Strasser?"

I strain a grin, lacing my words with bitterness, "We were."

Jörmungandr...Yggdrasil.

Plopping my head on the table, I stare at our recent game, "Jörmungandr was my younger brother. Better than me, both as a person and as a warrior. I only wanted the best for him, to my detriment. Call it selflessness, but I thought this was for the best, my own happiness for his progress. Looking back…He always wanted the best for me too, and I couldn't see it. Those two, I can see it."

"He meant so much to me."

Scooting their chairs around Odin and Mainz surround me. Mainz leans on my side and Odin rubs my back. Her hands go to spots they shouldn't have - causing me to tense up.

No.

Please.

Not now.

The pain. Its worse. It hurts more.

Standing up abruptly, I grunt loudly. Clumsily and erratically pushing the two off of me in a confusing display. Mainz takes to her feet quickly, although taken aback by my physical reprisal. Odin isn't so lucky and falls off her chair.

Backing away, I find myself in an uncomfortably familiar position. Staring at a fumbling Odin and a wide-eyed Mainz, I try to run away. Towards the direction of my hidden room, the workshop. Further into my home, I move and catch my leg on one of Odin's paintings. Only to feel one more sharp stabbing pain arch through my back and the world pausing to turn black.

Standing at the window, I let go of the blinds. The rabble outside is done and over with and the activity from the nearby pub has finally subsided. Huffing and pushing back the armchair, I sit away from the moonlit windows. Staying in the corner and continuing to stare off into the dark. I wanted to finally be left alone and stop hearing their cheers from out there. Against my wishes, the world decides my fate yet again.

"What." I turn towards the door. Not receiving a proper answer, I sit back again and stare at the window. Hearing the knocking again, I grunt in frustration. It's not Strasser, for she has yet to return back from the pub. Not the…Kommadant…he was led away by that coffee lover's rigging. Maybe in the comfort of a kansen who is willing to care for him better than me.

Such thoughts, I hate how it makes my heart ache.

I drop my head on my shoulder. Quiet resignation for yet again another night alone in my own self-loathing. This is my own doing and I know it. Why then does it not feel like before?

I've sat here by myself before coming here. Stepping out to handle my assigned affairs, pointless missions, and the other unimportant trivial things in life. Why then, oh why indeed, is it so difficult to stay in this chair?

The knocking happens again. Same rhythm and tune. Hearing it the third time, I have an inkling on who it may be. Getting up, I unlatch the locks. There's no point forcing someone who refuses to answer my words, I may confront this threat before it bothers me any-

"Friedrich."

"Graf Zeppelin."

Dressed in a wool sweater, she stands in black pants and a pair of sneakers. One hand is holding a tote bag, the other, a container covered in foil. The way she stares me down with a glowing orange in her eyes, behind her smile shows she's not going to be led away again.

I step aside and open my door for her, "Come in, state your business, and get out."

"My dear Zeppelin," she clicks her tongue, strutting in and putting down her belongings on a dress table, "You really need to clean. It's a mess in here."

"One more rude comment and you can see yourself out."

She drops the smile and pouts, "Graf Zeppelin, you've been keeping yourself cooped up in here for days. And I want to make sure you are okay. It worries me to see you like this."

I flinch a little, and I mean a bit, "Y-you don't have to."

She's not budging.

"I-", that look, it was like him. The old man, "Okay…fine. What, what do you plan to do?"

Brightening up quickly, she holds up the bag, "To care of you. I understand you may not be in the place of talking to me about what's going on, but I insist you at least let me take care of you for the time being…its worrisome for you to stay cooped up in here."

I can say no. I should say no. It doesn't matter she's pleading with me with those eyes of hers. I shouldn't stare so deeply. Or even bother to care. Yet, they entrap me, feeling her hands, lacking those clawed gauntlets. In their place are warm motherly like hands. They feel like the old man's…

Like papa's.

"Okay." I gulp, "I'll let you take care of me…only tonight. Afterwards, you leave me alone."

She arches her head, gently humming. Agreeing with the proposal.

"And" I stare off to the side, "Is that Spätzle?"

"Yes. I also brought other foods, you're not very vocal about your favorite cuisine. Just in case, I made more than enough for the both of us," The container she brought is a lot larger then I realized, I can feel my stomach betray me, "Would you like a serving now?"

"…yes, please."