She listened for any remaining trace of the rain that had left them stranded last night, but the sound of singing birds confirmed that the storm had passed. 'Almost the perfect storm', she mused. So much promise and yet … nothing.
She remembered her birthday just a few short months ago. She didn't recall much of the events of that night, but the feeling of his lips on hers was a sensation she was certain she would never forget. In fact, she had tried. Desperately. The butterflies fluttered incessantly in her stomach every time the memory floated back up to the surface despite her best efforts to drown it - deep down into the abyss of repressed desires to which she would now add the mere memories of last night. In one short year she had curated quite the collection - of repressed memories, that is. Moments of weakness in which one or the other, or in some cases both, lost themselves momentarily. Allowed themselves to wander into territory that might be considered inappropriate. Given away a little more than they wanted to, or should have. 'Should.' Funny word - should. It's curious the way we choose to live our lives by how others might perceive and judge us. When we should just be focusing on what makes us happy and not worry about others' opinions of what that happiness should consist of. 'I wish I was a little more like Mother in that regard.'
Angela slowly became aware of her surroundings. She could feel the warmth of his bare chest against the soft skin of her cheek as she gently moved up and then back down again with every breath that he took. Her left arm lay beneath her, while the right lay across his body, coming to rest just below his waist. Her right hand, she now realized, sat warmly nestled in his left. His hard, callused fingers interlaced with her soft, slender ones. She could feel the warmth of his other hand on her back. It was heavy and still. She was so intent on remaining still, for fear of waking him and breaking this moment, that she hadn't realized she was holding her breath. She inhales deeply and he stirs. Ever so slightly - but he did. She felt the weight of the hand on her back lighten and a very subtle squeeze of the hand that was sitting in his. She remained still, silently hoping that he hadn't woken - but, he had.
Tony's eyes slowly fluttered open and he smiled when he saw that Angela was sound asleep on his chest. Careful not to move a muscle, he watched her for a moment before closing his eyes again. He too wanted to take in the feel of her in his embrace, even if just for a minute longer. He thought about the events that brought them to this moment in time. 'Ingrid, unbelievable'. He allowed his mind to reflect back on that night as a young boy at make out rock. As he fell deeper into his reverie, his thumb absentmindedly began brushing softly against Angela's back. It was as though he was subconsciously acting out the very action he was imagining - lifting and lowering his thumb with each letter he wrote on the rock I-N-G-R-I-D. Had his eyes not been closed, he would have seen the dreamy smile that touched upon her lips as Angela also lost her composure for a short second. As though waking from a dream, he slowly became aware of his actions and immediately stopped. At that moment, Angela knew for certain that he was now awake.
A cold chill now replaced the warmth where his hand had held her close, her heart tightening as he released her hand from his. The moment was over.
Angela's eyes began to sting as she found herself unable to shake the feeling that she had just lost something so precious. Swallowing back the tears that were threatening to expose her, she came to the painful realization that nothing in this world would ever compare to being held lovingly in his arms. She remembered how natural it felt waking up next to him in Samantha's bed. The way he mindlessly caressed her arm just moments before they realized the full extent of the predicament they were in. Angela released a soft, weary sigh and the awkwardness began almost immediately.
Tony cleared his throat, "good mornin' Ange. Uh, Angela. … Good morning Angela." He finally articulated.
Angela slowly lifted her head from his chest and looked up at him with a smile "Good morning Tony." Looking down at the spot on his chest where she had just lay she added, "I … I'm sorry."
Tony shook his head. "Don't be. Did you sleep well?" he asked, his voice cracking. He wanted to sit up but her leg was still on him.
"I did. You?" Angela was calm and content, a glaring contrast to Tony's disposition.
"Took me a while to fall asleep but, I think once I conked out I stayed that way," he replied.
An awkward silence filled the room. Tony desperately wanted to jump out of bed and put out the fire that was burning between them but he was in no condition to do so. He was a man, it was morning and he had just woken up in bed with Angela draped across his body. At some point throughout the night she had thrown her leg over his and brought the covers with her. When he looked down all he could see was the lace of her panties peeking out from the short pajama top she was wearing and that had been enough to put him in a very uncomfortable position. He slid his leg from underneath hers and sat up against the headboard. She yawned and stretched her arms out, "ohhh!" she shouted as she realized a couple of her buttons had come undone overnight and her shirt opened as she stretched. She immediately pulled the shirt back together with both hands but it wasn't fast enough …
"OH COME ON ANGELA!" Tony cried.
Her eyes grew wide. She was startled by his reaction and couldn't believe how upset he was with her. "Tony!" she replied in dismay.
"I'm sorry Angela but a guy can only take so much." Tony was obviously frustrated.
"It's not like I did it on purpose." She tried to explain. But Tony wouldn't even look at her. He couldn't. He didn't trust himself given the circumstances. It was all just too much.
'First the Ingrid thing! Fine, I can handle that,' he thought. 'Then we got stranded in this motel, with one room, and no clothes, and very questionable programming on the TV. I'm a grown man though, I can control my urges … But then the ceiling caves in? I tried to do the honourable thing and sleep on the chair but I fell, so then we ended up in the same bed - her suggestion and I couldn't let on and not get into bed with her that would have looked worse … a TWIN bed no less … What else?!' Tony rubbed his hands through his hair, he was losing it. Meanwhile all he could think about was how good her lips felt on his the night of her birthday and then how fantastic she looked coming out of her tub naked … and then the alluring look on her face just before they went to bed when she told him that things could probably be good between them the way they aren't. "Woman! I'm not made of STONE!" He shouted.
Angela's eyes grew wide again and her jaw dropped. She waited for him to come around but after a couple of moments of silence and him staring at her like a deer caught in headlights, she gave up. She slowly slid out of bed making sure she was covered, as much as she could possibly be in that pajama top and stood next to the bed. "I'm going to go shower. I will leave the door unlocked in case you need to pee. Rest assured I will make sure the curtain is fully closed."
When Tony didn't respond she made her way into the bathroom, closed the door behind her and got into the shower.
Tony felt terrible the moment he heard the bathroom door close. 'What have I done?' He was tired, hungry, irritable and frustrated beyond compare and he knew he had overreacted.
"Angela, wait!" he shouted from the bed as he jumped out and followed her, but all he heard in response was the water begin to run. He reached the door and placed his hand on the handle but decided not to turn it. Instead, he dropped his forehead against the door and whispered "I'm sorry Ange." His voice was small. Defeated. 'Why is this so complicated?' He wondered. 'Does the entire universe hate us? Why couldn't she be old and unattractive? Why did she have to be so damn beautiful and smart and witty and beautiful and … Ingrid. God damn it!' "Angela! I'm coming in" he said while simultaneously knocking on the door. "Angela?"
"You can go ahead and pee. I won't bother you." Her tone was cold, he knew she was upset and he couldn't blame her.
"Angela, can we talk?" No reply. "Please?" He begged.
"What is it you want to talk about?"
'Okay, at least she didn't tell me to get lost.' Tony opened the door the rest of the way and walked into the bathroom, "Come on Ange."
On the other side of the curtain Angela proceeded to shampoo her hair. She was hurt. This situation had been equally frustrating for her, he had no right to shout at her. 'I didn't put us in this situation. It is not my fault that things turned out the way they did. I did not create the storm that blocked the roads. I did not book every damn room in this place and force us to share one. I did not cause the ceiling to cave in on myself. Okay, so I suggested we sleep in the same bed but what was I supposed to do? Just let him sleep on the floor all night? I was trying to help! That man can be such a baby sometimes!'
"Angela?" he began, "I'm sorry I shouted at you." 'I'm sorry that I was frustrated waking up with you lying on top of me with your lace panties showing - damn it!' Again he rubbed his fingers through his hair, he had no idea how to make this better without first making it worse. But they do say that the only way out is through … "Look Angela. You are a very … very attractive woman." Angela took in a sharp breath. Of all the things she had expected him to say - this was not one of them. "Sleeping next to you last night was very … difficult for me." He continued. "Waking up this morning with you … on top of me … it was … uncomfortable." He tried.
Angela was offended. "Uncomfortable? I'm so sorry Tony that I made you uncomfortable," she mocked him as she repeated the word in a childish tone. "I thought we were friends! … best friends" she added in a whisper that he didn't hear over the water. "I thought we were beyond feeling uncomfortable around each other after all we've been through together."
"Angela! … you … you don't understand."
"Well then explain it to me Tony!" She spat out.
"Waking up next to you this morning … it was … frustrating..."
"Frustrating!?" She had no idea what he was getting at and she was becoming increasingly furious with him.
"It was HARD Angela! OKAY? Waking up next to you this morning was … hard!"
Her jaw dropped. As the words came tumbling out of his mouth her eyes flew open. 'FUCK' Shampoo suds washed over them, burning and stinging as though hundreds of tiny needles were poking at them. "Damn it!" she shouted. She pulls back the curtain, Tony gasps and looks away. "Towel! I need a towel" Angela is squinting, reaching around for a towel, Tony realizes he is now facing the mirror and still able to see a naked Angela behind him.
'Are you kidding me!' "Angela, what's wrong?" he sees her frantically reaching for a towel, no idea what is happening. She gets her hands on one and starts wiping her eyes with it. "Are you crying?" he asks her.
Angela looks up at him, "NO I am not crying!" She grabs the curtain and disappears behind it once again taking the towel in with her. "I got shampoo in my eyes!"
"What? Why would you open your eyes when there's shampoo in your hair?"
"Maybe they flew open because they were shocked by your confession."
"Ohhhhh" Tony whispered. "Angela, I am so sorry."
For a moment there was silence, as they both contemplated the situation they were in. Neither knowing how to make things right, but both knowing that they wanted to try. Angela turns off the water and wraps the towel around her body despite it being a little wet from her previous fumbling. She pulls back the curtain and sees Tony sitting on the bathroom counter, eyes closed, looking down. She laughs softly. "You can open your eyes."
"Moddona Mia Ange, I'm not sure I want to." Angela starts laughing. She is so frustrated and exhausted from the events of the last twenty-four hours that her laugh turns into giggles and she just cannot stop. She is laughing so hard that tears begin to stream down her cheeks and she steps over the side of the tub and takes a seat next to Tony on the counter.
She nudges him with her shoulder, "Tony, open your eyes." This time, he does.
He looks at her sitting next to him. Her hair is tousled and wet. The little beads that form on the ends begin to trickle from her shoulders, all the way down her chest disappearing at the towel where it covers her breasts. 'Boy are you in trouble Micelli.'
"Ange, I'm really sorry." He says again, his eyes sincere.
"I'm sorry too." She replies. "I honestly never thought about … that. I mean … I did … and I didn't … You know?" She looked to him for confirmation that he understood.
"I understand." He assured.
"I swear I didn't intend to wake up wrapped up like a pretzel. I didn't mean to …"
"I know. I know you wouldn't." He said cutting her off. It was never his intent to imply she was trying to seduce him or anything of that nature. He wanted her to know that. "But … it was kinda nice … wasn't it?" he whispered.
She met his gaze and smiled. "The best."
They sat there for a moment. Looking into each other's eyes. Thinking about all the things that could be if they would just cross that line and all the reasons they shouldn't. "I'm gonna go get dressed, you wash up. We should head back, I'm sure the campers are worried about us." She finally suggested.
Tony didn't speak. Instead he held her hand, leaned in and placed a soft kiss on her cheek.
He didn't know if it was the guilt of having seen her naked a second time or if he really just wanted to assure her that he was not uncomfortable around her. He jumped down off the counter and turned on the water in the shower, then dropped his pants right in front of her giving her an unobstructed view of his perfectly shaped rear end before stepping into the tub.
"We're even Ingrid." He shouted from behind the curtain and Angela's jaw slackened in amusement.
"I'm not sure that was quite 57 seconds … maybe you should draw that curtain again and I'll start timing." She smirked.