Camelot drabble Prompt 528: bounty
Author's notes: Disclaimer: I do not own the BBC version of Merlin; They and Shine do. I am very respectfully borrowing them with no intent to profit. No money has changed hands. No copyright infringement is intended.
It was an insult. Five hundred gold pieces for the capture of a High Priestess and rightful queen of Camelot? It should be two thousand at the very least.
Morgana tore the announcement into mere scraps, then burned the remains. Apparently, her dear brother had not taken her seriously enough.
That was about to change. And as usual, she would have to show him how it was done.
With a wave of her hand, she sent a black cloud of crows into the far reaches of the Five Kingdoms, each with parchment declaring a bounty of a thousand gold pieces for Arthur's head and that she and she alone was the true ruler of Camelot. Telling one and all that Arthur's pathetic offer of five hundred was cheap, a bit tawdry and an insult to bounty hunters everywhere.
The next day, according to her sources, the reward for her capture was raised to fifteen hundred.
Sniffing at Arthur's pathetic reply, she increased her offer to two thousand. Arthur countered with twenty-five hundred, Morgan's rolled her eyes then increased the reward to three thousand.
On and on, each trying to outbid the other.
Before the month was out, Arthur offered half his kingdom while Morgana offered eternal life and a mountain of gold to whoever would bring her Arthur's head. Honestly though, it was a bit surprising that no one had taken her up on it. Who wouldn't want to live forever? Or have a mountain of gold? It was beyond imagining.
Still, she was pondering what to do next when Merlin, her poisoner, her sworn enemy, her doom if the legends were true, showed up. "Hi," he said, waving his hand as though greeting a friend.
"You!" Morgana glared, already thinking of how many ways she could kill him. Poison wouldn't be enough. She would have to torture him until he screamed for mercy, then torture him some more, just because. Then send what was left back to Arthur in a sack.
Of course, the idiot didn't run for the hills. Instead, clearing his throat, Merlin said carefully, "Arthur sent me. I know, I know, I'm not the best one for this, but someone had to, and Arthur insisted, the prat."
"What do you want, friend?" Morgana hissed, still astonished that Merlin didn't know how much trouble he was in. She was the High Priestess of the Isle of the Blessed. Didn't he know just how powerful she was? Would she have to show him—again—just how easily she could tear him to pieces?
He really was a gormless idiot. He just stood there, clearly unimpressed by her glare. "Arthur wants a truce. Well, Arthur really wants for you to come home and be his sister again, but I can't see that happening. So, here's the offer." Merlin hesitated when she scowled at him, then continued, "He will accept that you are his heir. He offers you a seat on the council and Tintagel castle, Gorlois's keep, for your own if you stop with this feud."
Glaring at him, Morgana snapped, "I am the rightful ruler of Camelot. What he offers is an insult."
"Sounds pretty good to me. But if you aren't interested, I'll let him know," Merlin said, shrugging, then turned to go.
"Why should I? I could have it all," Morgana shouted after him.
That stopped him. "Well, look at it this way. No one has taken you up on your offer. I know you think eternal life is fun but really? Is it? And what would a mountain of gold do but drive down the value of gold? And if it's magic gold, everyone knows that it will evaporate the next day. So—"
"I can offer power beyond imagining," Morgana said, knowing that Merlin was right. Magic gold was really worthless, and everyone with half a brain knew it. But then, Arthur couldn't afford to give away his kingdom, either. That was really the whole point of their feud.
"Until you get bored and take it back and then where would the bounty hunters be?" Merlin pointed out. "Look, Arthur's offer is more than fair. I think you should take it."
"And what's the catch? It's too generous by half," Morgana growled.
Merlin grimaced, looking pained as he said, "Well… there was one other thing. Arthur refused to do it, but Gwen insisted. I wasn't sure you'd go for it." Merlin whispered, half-to-himself, "Arthur would hate it with the heat of a thousand burning suns. He'll make my life a living hell every time you two would—"
Morgana liked the sound of that, Arthur hating something so much and Merlin bearing the brunt of Arthur's fury. She was intrigued. It might be worth agreeing just to see Merlin bruised and bloodied.
"And if I agree? Do I get to watch him beating you senseless?" Morgana began to smile. It sounded like it could be fun.
"Yes, I guess? But are you sure? You haven't heard what it is yet," Merlin said, his voice squeaking. His hands were fluttering around, a sure sign of nervousness.
"And? Should I be scared? Of you? Of him? Really, Merlin, I have more power in my little finger than all of Camelot." Her grin grew wider. "So, what terrible thing do I have to do?"
Gulping, looking guilty and worried and ready to bolt, Merlin said, "Therapy."
For a second, she thought he said 'therapy'. Then staring at him, Morgana demanded, "Therapy?"
"You know, talking to each other with someone to help you resolve your emotional issues? Therapy?" Merlin's voice was squeaking higher, almost into bat-ear range.
"We don't have issues. Arthur is the usurper; I am the rightful queen. Case closed," Morgana hissed.
Merlin looked relieved. "All right. See you." He scampered back toward the woods, clearly wanting to escape before Morgana could do anything else.
"Wait!" Morgana called after him. If Arthur didn't want to do it, then damn, she was ready to. "So if I agree, who would be the therapist? You? Gwen? Some stableboy who already knows how to shovel horse shit?"
"Gaius," Merlin said, looking very uncomfortable. "He… he can make people spill their guts with just one eyebrow. Can you imagine what he'd do with two?"
Merlin had a point. Gaius could get just about anyone to confess with just one look.
But, on the other hand, watching Arthur deal with emotions might be fun. For him, it would be worse than the worst of the tortures she could devise. And if it came to it, she'd only lost a few days at most in her quest to have it all.
It was sounding more and more intriguing, the thought of Arthur and feelings, the way he'd bluster and squirm, the way he'd deny it all as Gaius's eyebrow rose higher and higher.
Arthur spilling his guts in front of Morgana.
"I accept," Morgana said, nodding toward the woods and the castle beyond. "I will be there tomorrow. Be sure that Gaius is free all afternoon as I'm sure the emotional therapy you mention might take more than a few minutes. Arthur is a bit stubborn when it comes to admitting to feelings."
Merlin muttered, almost too low for Morgana to hear, "Tell me about it."
"Yes, the poor dear. He could never admit that he liked… anything," Morgana said. "I'm sure it will do him a world of good."
And Morgana would be there when Arthur was humiliated, thoroughly and completely.
She couldn't wait.
The end