CHAPTER III

Slowly but still unstoppable the burning sensation spread through his throat and into his belly where it expanded and seemed to explode. Even though a small very quiet part of his mind told him that getting drunk was a mistake in this situation Sirius didn't care all that much about what the reasonable part of his mind had to say. Now was not the time for reason. Now was the time for grief. And grief he did. For a week he had grieved now, and he planned to continue until the Firewhiskey burned away the pain. It didn't work like that of course but it still seemed to dull the pain for the time being. The man that he had called brother, the man that had taken him in when he had run away from home was dead. James had taken him in when he had been like a stray dog and his parents had treated him like there child. And he had repaid their kindness by sending Harry of to live with his relatives that by all accounts hated magic with a passion. Again, the glass when to his lips and again the burning sensation spread through his body, and he could feel that his mind was beginning to fog over.

Alcohol had always had this effect on him. It had always amplified his negative emotions and the amount of fury that he felt when he thought about Harry having to live with the Dursleys was immeasurable. But still he loathed himself even more for allowing it. Again, and again the question resurfaced if he should have fought Dumbledores decision. The old wizard was probably right but still Sirius regretted not keeping the boy. He was so small, so vulnerable and totally at the mercy of Lilys sister. Sirius raised his arm, balled his hand into a fist and smashed it into the table with all his might. This feeling of being totally useless and impotent, of not being able to do anything was driving him mad. Bad enough that a severing curse form Rockwood had taken his balls but now Dumbledore made him relive this sensation of being unmanned! He hated the old goat for that, but he also loved the man. Dumbledore had been their leader and had often enough saved their lives during the war, but it was very hard to follow the old wizard into peace it seemed. I didn't help much that fucking Snivellus Snape had arrived this morning and been greeted by Dumbledore like and old friend. He himself knew that he had fought that man at least twice during the war. No mask could hide a wizard's duelling style and Snapes he knew to well.

"I take it that you will not be joining us for the festivities?" Dumbledore's voice brought Sirius back to reality and the memories of his battle against his arc nemesis vanished like smoke. Sirius turned his head towards the headmaster. Even though he didn't know it he looked bad. His eyes were bloodshot form a lack of sleep and form the heavy drinking he had been partaking in during the last week. His hair was messed up and greasy and he still wore the same robs he had been wearing during Halloween. Sirius lowered his gaze. There was a party. No not one but many being celebrated throughout magical Britain. The Dark Lord had been vanquished and the last of his followers captured by Albus Dumbledore himself when he came to the rescue of the Longbottom family. His cousin Bellatrix had been there, and he wished that he could have come with Dumbledore. A fight might have helped him work of some of the steam had had been accumulating inside of him. "No Albus, I won't be joining you." He slurred and felt embarrassed immediately. He had drunk to much that was painfully obvious but the look that Dumbledore gave him would have shattered the shell that he had put around himself and laid bare how weak and sad Sirius Black was right know.

Dumbledore waved his hand and a second tumbler materialized on the table. The headmaster of Hogwarts, supreme Mugwump and Chief Warlock pored himself a glass and proceeded to drink it in one go before he poured again. "Sirius whilst you have my deepest sympathy for your lose, and I to feel great pain at the untimely end of Lily and James I cannot any longer entertain you wallowing in self-pity." As Sirius raised his eyes in burning fury to retort something he meet the gaze of one of the most powerful wizards of all time and decided that it was a lot smarter to shut up. Thus, having sufficiently cowed Sirius Dumbledore continued. "Loving someone requires from us great sacrifice my boy. Love is not only an emotion. Love is commitment and devotion. Love is duty my boy and you are failing miserably in yours. Whilst you might be angry at me because of young Harry you still know well enough why there is no other way this is no excuse for neglecting Richard." Dumbledore's words hit home as Sirius face mouth feel open in shock. To be honest Richard had since his birth been a very self-sufficient child. He had never really cried or demanded attention. The boy seemed content enough when he was left to his own devices and in Sirius opinion seemed to hat to ask for help even when he needed it. Overall, Richard Potter was a very remarkable child. And a weird one. Sirius didn't replay anything. Dumbledore was right. Whilst Richard seemed to take it almost too well no one had tried to explain to him what had happened to his parents. And even though he didn't want to admit it Sirius was afraid of trying to explain it. It was one thing being the Godfather that brought candy and toys but a completely different thing to try and raise a child. "Help me Albus I don't know what to do." Sirius words were slurs as he opened his heart to the headmaster. "Richards seems to be taking this better than me and the boy is so…is so…." Sirius searched for the right word to describe Richard, but nothing came to mind. "Mature?" supplied Dumbledore and Sirius agreed. "There is no denying that Richard is a very special child my boy. One that night a week ago I could feel how he shaped his magic as I considered sending him along with Harry." Sirius couldn't believe it. He had never heard about a child being able to exercise such control over magic. "Yes, Albus your joke is appreciated." Sirius said before he took another swing. "I wish it were a joke my boy but alas it is not. It is the reason why I didn't send him along with Harry. The amount of damage young Richard could do to himself and other if no one is there to monitor his growing power could be fatal, not to mention that your godson seems to be a natural occlumens- and a powerful one at that." Dumbledore continued and Sirius couldn't help it but feel his chest swell in pride. His godson had impressed Dumbledore at the tender age of 3. O how his mother would have reacted to the news of a Potter being a natural occlumens. She would have probably screamed herself hoarse about blood traitors using perverted magic to steal the skill from a pure-blooded child. He would have loved to witness it. And in this instant, he became aware of the crazy grin that had taken over his face at the thought and he relaxed his lips. "I see that you understand why it is important that you start takinf responsibility my boy. Without a firm hand to guide Richard he could grow to be handful. I knew a boy once that was like him and his story didn't end well." Dumbledore continued and his eyes never left Sirius. "That still doesn't answer my question Albus, what should I do." Sirius pleaded. "Be there for him Sirius, teach him, help him grow and always make sure that he can tell right from wrong" And thus the topic was closed. A few more glasses were emptied as both man shared stories about the recently deceased and with Sirius learning that Dumbledore knew all too well about the pranks that the Marauders were responsible for and that he had tolerated for years. Meanwhile no on saw the figure of one Phineas Nigellus Black slip away from a small portrait.

At number 12 Grimmauld Place a one wizard idled away the days. Life had lost all meaning to Lord Arcturus Black once the most powerful and purest House of the Sacred Twenty-Eight. Now they were gone. Destroyed. Ground to dust and all that was left was ash and blackened bones. Regulus dead, Orion dead, Waldburga dead, Bellatrix poised to lose her mind and besides married to the despicable Rodolphus Lestrange or was it to the other one? Arcturus didn't know and he didn't care any longer. His line was at an end. When he died nothing would remain of the Black name. Only a worthless heir that had managed to get himself gelded during this thrice damned war. He had never supported this but there was only so much that could be done when your family tree was a circle. His family's ancient tradition of keeping the blood pure had turned out to be their doom in the end. Sometimes he wondered if this all had been an elaborate ploy to destroy the Black family. If it had been then he would have liked to congratulate the cunning mind that had come up with it. It had worked flawlessly. Arcturus musing were cut short by the noise of someone running. And whilst Arcturus was sure that he had just lost his mind, Phineas Nigellus Black appeared inside of his portrait and didn't pause to catch his breath before he let loose. "Arcturus listen carefully…" Lord Black raised his wand. He had enough of his troublesome ancestor. The man was as tiresome as having diarrhea and he wouldn't deal with him any longer. Just as he was about let loose a curse that would have destroyed to portrait and most likely the wall behind it as well Phineas ended his sentence. "there is still hope for us." Arcturus stopped his wand raised and the tip glowing with a pale blue light. "This better not be one of your bright ideas Phineas because if it is I swear on Merlin's shrivelled balls I will end your existence." "This is no way to speak to once ancestor." The portrait screamed, insulted by the manners of the acting Lord Black. Arcturus smiled. He was an old man; he had no time left for pretending to be something he was not. "Phineas, I grow tired of you. Say your piece and be off." If looks could kill the Arcturus Blacks life would have ended right, there but still Phineas continued "Your worthless heir might yet ensure the survival of the Black name." Arcturus didn't care to believe the portrait. Was this as last of cruelty to punish him for his failure? "Stop speaking in riddles old man and speak plainly." He commanded and Phineas obliged. "Richard Potter!"

"The whelp of James and Lily Potter and godson to Sirius. What can we expect but further embarrassment from the fruit of there union?" And so, Arcturus Black learned about what Phineas had managed to overhear during the last week in Hogwarts. "I am telling you Arcturus, Dumbledore himself praised the boys might and he is even a natural occlumes. The first one I have heard about in a long time. This is our chance, and we must seize it least Dumbledore get his claws into Richard first." Arcturus war certainly impressed but he still wondered. Sure, the boy's prowess were considerable if Phineas was not exaggerating in his report and the bond between Sirius and Richard gave them the perfect legal reasoning to adopt him into the Black family. But still Arcturus was unconvinced. Maybe he was afraid, afraid of disappointment. He had no wish to invest himself into another fruitless endeavour, but he couldn't afford to let this opportunity pass either. But even if he wanted the boy, getting him would be a difficult task in itself. Unless drastic measures be taken. "Phineas return to Hogwarts immediately and inform Dumbledore that I will send an owl." Phineas face contracted in absolute disgust. What had been his idea Arcturus wondered. To try and kidnap the boy? No, this was only possible if Albus Dumbledore was convinced that this would benefit him. Sirius would never be convinced to return to House Black if Dumbledore didn't command it. Well Dumbledore would not command anything, but Arcturus knew well enough that a request from his old transfiguration teacher was as much a command as anything. And know he only needed to make Dumbledore an offer he couldn't refuse. "What will you offer him?" Phineas voice was weak and barely a whisper. Arcturus ancestor seemed to be very fearful of his answer. "The influence and might of House Black, my voice in the Wizengamot and my wealth. It will be worth it but only after I have met the boy. The old goat will not be able to resist the temptation of landing another punch against his enemies and getting House Black to his side." Or at least this was what Arcturus hoped. Without another word Phineas decided to do as he was told and as he vanished again Arcturus dared to hope that maybe his line could yet be saved.