Dean opened the car door and stepped out. His first though was to check up Sam. He got sick so he and Cas had to leave him behind. Cas followed after Dean down the stairs. The bunker had becomed a home for them.
Dean yelled loud "Sam! We're back." The echo went down the entire bunker. He took of his jacket and hung it over a chair. Then he saw Sam. He looked even worse than when they left. He stood looking for a book with a blanket wrapped around him. "Crist Sam, what are you doing? You should be lying down." Dean says caring.
Cas came closer to the two boys. He put his hand on Sams forehead. "You have fever" he says simple. Dean took the book out of Sams hand and led him to his room. Cas heard his coughing long after he lost visual. It made Cas think back. If he had had his full angelpower he could easily have fixed Sam. Himself too. It had taken all energy to fix his shoulder. Before he could snap his fingers and the demon would been gone. Exausted as he was he sat down in a good chair. Leaning back as far as possible.
Cas closed his eyes. He might not sleep, but it still felt good to just lie there. He opened his eyes again. Dean came through the door. "Sam is safe back in bed." Dean says tired too. In his hand was two bears. Cas did not drink so much, but he needed it now. They needed it.
"We have to talk." Cas said after the first sip. "About what?" Dean answer. He knows damn well what he means, but why must they do it now? "You know what, Dean." Cas continue. Dean exhale tired. "Look, I just want this thing we got to stay this way." Dean says. Cas wondering what he ment with this thing.
"You, me and Sam. Team free will. You are family Cas, I don't want to loose you." Dean says. Suprising both Cas and himself with the confession. Usually it takes more than one bear to make him talk like that. "I know that, but if you were in my shoes, you would have done the same." Cas replies. Its true. If it was Cas he had pointed the gun at, Dean would have stepped infront to keep Cas alive.
But that was the reason. He would rather die than letting another one close to him go. He hated himself for it, but it was true. Both Sam and Cas deserved living more than him. That bothered him. That they did not see it too.
Cas did not need to read Deans mind to know what he was thinking. Dean did not want him to step infront of the gun because he had this messed up though that he deserves to die.
"Good talk." Dean says while heading towards his room. "Good night, Dean." Cas say quiet to himself.