She doesn't leave his room on day 1.

He's still unconscious, recovering from the procedure he's had before being transferred back in Seattle, from being stranded in the middle of nowhere after a plane crash for days, and the doctor in her has to make a conscious effort to not shake him awake. She knows he needs the rest, even if she'd feel better if he'd open his eyes and she could see by herself that her best friend is definitely alive. But she can see his chest rising and falling, she can feel his warm hand (possibly because she hasn't let it go for more than two minutes in all the hours she's been here), so she adjusts her position in the chair she's claimed as hers on his bedside and tries to contain her sighs.

On the other side of the bed, Catherine tries to keep busy, fluffing a pillow here, adjusting the bed there, consulting his chart and demanding a complete update every time a doctor comes into the room. April's pretty sure there's not an exam Catherine Avery hasn't asked the doctors to perform on her son, and she'd try to talk her out of checking Jackson's blood levels again (she's pretty sure they have not changed since the last time they've checked, which was an hour ago), but she's no match against Catherine Avery, and all she can do is stay by Jackson's side, squeeze his hand, and wait.

Mark Sloan comes to visit him on day 2.

She still hasn't moved, hands still clasped around his, back aching from the most uncomfortable night in the hospital chair. There's been a few visitors between the litany of doctors coming to check up on him, Alex has been here a few times, but Mark hasn't yet. When he comes in, looking older than ever, she straightens up and looks at the plastic surgeon, silently asking him if he wants her to step outside, but Mark shakes his head and just stares at Jackson.

"They told me he was with her when she died," and the fact that he doesn't even say her name makes it even more surreal for April, because how can Lexie be dead? "He and Mer were with her. She told them she loved me, and then–" A wheezing sound escapes him, and April gets up and goes towards him, gently guiding him towards her seat. She was never close with Sloan, never had any reason to be, but seeing him like this breaks her heart. She wonders for an instant if it would be all right to hug him, but Mark shakes his head, hand promptly wiping tears, and talk in the raspiest voice she's heard.

"He's going to be fine, Kepner. Behind that pretty exterior, he's tough."

For Mark's sake, she manages to give him a faint smile, but it's clear that her heart is not in it.

"Catherine already told him he doesn't have a choice."

Mark nods and gets up. He heads towards the door but stops just before crossing the threshold.

"Kepner?"

"Yes, Doctor Sloan?

"Don't take this the wrong way, and I'm sure he won't mind, but... When was the last time you showered?"

Something happens on day 3.

Catherine has just stepped outside for a minute to get some coffee when April is startled by Jackson suddenly moving.

He twitches, his body tenses up, and he starts rolling his head left and right, his back arching away from the bed. For the hundredth time this week, her heart breaks, because she knows what this is, has witnessed it on Jackson Avery only last year. Except this time, he doesn't wake up screaming. His body thrashes around, his heart rate spikes up, but his eyes don't open, and only a few words can be heard. She immediately stands up, putting a hand on his forehead and the other one on his chest, drawing circles with her thumb, and she can only repeat the words she has become familiar with after the shooting until he calms down and his breathing becomes quiet again. It's okay. Sshhh. You're fine. It's a nightmare. It's over, I promise. Go to sleep. I got you.

When Catherine comes back, irritated because "no one in this hospital knows how to practice medicine anymore!", Jackson is sleeping peacefully again, and April doesn't say anything; she just wipes out a few beads of sweet on his forehead and resumes her position in the chair.

He wakes up on day 4.

And of course, he chooses to do so during one of her rare bathroom-coffee-stretching her legs breaks. So when she walks into his room and sees Catherine's radiant smile and his piercing eyes on her, her first instinct is to roll her eyes and swat him. But she has manners, and she's so relieved that she only drops her cup of coffee and smiles uncontrollably, eyes shining with tears. She sits beside him, but feels too shy to take his hand now that he's awake. She'd talked to him while he was sleeping, and her hand had never left his, but everything feels different now. She's just the friend, and now is not the time to talk about San Francisco, about them, so she keeps her hands to herself and listens to Catherine. She smiles when he rolls his eyes at one of his mother's comments, frowns when he insists he can walk by himself to the bathroom (he can't), and doesn't blink when he looks at her after she asks him how he's feeling (he doesn't answer).

Soon, Owen and Richard and Bailey usher her out of the room, wanting to perform some tests on Jackson. Catherine stays, because even Bailey is no match for Catherine that day, and she finds an empty on-call room. She barely has the time to close the doors before erupting in big, messy sobs that she's pretty sure can be heard from the hallway, but she doesn't care. He's here. He's back. He's alive.

She avoids him on day 5.

He's back, but everything feels different. She doesn't know what to do, what to say to someone who has just gone through an indefinable trauma, and for a minute she's almost sure he doesn't want her there, doesn't want her to wreak more havoc on his life. She thought being terrified would end when Jackson woke up. But now that he's awake? She's afraid, in a different way, so she takes any excuse not to be in his room. She goes back to their place to pick up some clean clothes for him and a few other things he might need, she volunteers to round on his patients (Sloan gives her a strange look, but agrees to it. He himself is working, so he's not in a position to say anything), she goes on coffee runs for the whole floor, and she visits the other survivors. Arizona is unconscious, and Alex doesn't even look at her when she enters her room, but Callie hugs her and April, while surprised, goes with it. Meredith and Derek are both awake and smiling, despite Derek's bandaged hand, and they both thank her for helping out with Zola. April brushes them off, saying it was the natural thing to do, but Meredith's gaze is softer than ever when she looks at her. It hardens when April says she's sorry about Lexie, and after that the conversation dries out, so she quickly leaves. Cristina doesn't talk to her, doesn't look at her, and though Owen tells her she's been like this even since they came back and not to take it personally, she leaves the room wondering if she shouldn't have come.

By the end of the day, she's out of ideas and she's tired to run, so she goes back to his room and hesitates only a moment before making her presence known. Catherine's smile is wide, and she gives Jackson an I-told-you-so look April's not sure she understands before leaving the room to get something to eat. Jackson doesn't say anything at first, just stares at her, and she grimaces before sitting down. She doesn't know how to act, what to say, so she just goes with the first thing that comes to mind.

"So, I would hit you with one of your pillows for giving me the fright of a lifetime, but I guess your mom and all your doctors might disapprove."

His smile is not exactly the one she knows, but his eyes sparkle and he lets out a faint chuckle that warms her heart. She squeezes his hand, gently, in a silent promise, and gets butterflies in her stomach when he squeezes back.

He tells her that he, they're going to be fine on day 6, and for a few minutes she decides to believe him.