[Lucifer is standing in a modern apartment with barely fitting clothes and looking bleakly at his script. The director sits in her fold out chair with a rolled up newspaper for a mega phone]
DIRECTOR: Action!
LUCIFER: You wrote out my paycheque to Lucifer.
DIRECTOR: That's right.
LUCIFER: You don't know my name?
DIRECTOR: Yes, you're Lucifer.
LUCIFER: I am an actor.
DIRECTOR: Well, I haven't seen this show, have I?
LUCIFER: Then how can you expect me to act without a script?
DIRECTOR: Look, I've seen like, maybe the cover of your show. It's obvious what happens in the show, although I've never seen it.
LUCIFER: Really?
DIRECTOR: Yes! It's all in the script.
LUCIFER: It says, take off your shirt and grin - devilishly.
DIRECTOR: That's right. I don't actually know how they made several seasons out of it.
LUCIFER: There's an actual story!
DIRECTOR: Oh, now come on, let's not play games.
LUCIFER: I'm off.
DIRECTOR: Now Lucifer, you're clearly just Arrow, but all you say is I'm from Hell, and women don't believe you, and then you take your shirt off, and then they like you for your pecs, and they forget you're the Devil, and you do that every episode! Trust me, that's all that happens!