"I swear , Serena, this has been the most stressful month of my life."

"O-o-o-h, I know, Emily. Is this us? I'll split the fare - Per Se ? Emily - "

"Oh, please. You know I booked it using Miranda's name. We'll go in - let me take the lead - hiii , I'm Emily Charlton, Miranda couldn't make it unfortunately, here's my business card, but she wanted me to have her table - thank you. Our menus? Fab … see?"

"Y-o-o-u are kidding! What if word gets back?"

"Serena, Allison does this, too. Nobody really cares. So are we gonna talk about me or what?"

"Y-e-e-s. Spill."

" So . Of course, at last, I get over the mono, which mind over matter helped not at all. And I'm booking flights and interviews nannies all while she goes to Paris with Miranda. And then , of course, I hear that she told her royal highness to go f - to go eff herself. Yes, we'll take these drinks, and these for starters. Thank you."

"E-m-i-l-y, we shouldn't be eating any of this. You know I won't fit into the new pair of Sevens."

"Oh, shut up, Serena. I can tell you, it has been an ordeal. I'm right back to where I started, with no junior assistant, interviewing idiots who I just know Miranda will fire within the first day, and Sharon keeps sending me more of the same, and I have to resist marching down to Human Resources to chuck the Book at her."

"S-p-e-a-k-i-n-g of , how do you think Nigel feels?"

"Nigel? Well . I guess that's to be expected, Serena. There was no way Miranda was going to let Jacqueline Follet steal her seat. And Runway , um, wouldn't be the success it is today."

"C-o-m-e on . I asked about Nigel ."

"Then bloody go ask him yourself!"

"L-o-w-e-r your voice, Emily."

"Sorry."

"I-'m just saying. He was so excited to be joining James Holt's team. And he has such a flair, you know him. He would be making so much money as president of the company."

"... he'd still be pandering to Miranda, you know."

"B-u-t this would have been a step up for him! He's devastated, and more so that he was cheated out of it by her ."

"Well, that's the nature of h - of business. You know?"

"I-'m just saying . It can't be easy for him. You should be nicer - "

"I can't bloody afford to be nice , not when I have to interview every dimwit from FIT who thinks eating nothing and smiling at Miranda are the only qualifications for the job. You have it easy."

"D-o I?"

"Yes! You and Allison and Jessica and Jeffy. You do minor editorial work, or fashion work, you know nothing you bring her will be good enough, she sighs and says That's all and then you just rinse repeat. Granted, it's a lot of stress , but you're never going to get praise or a cookie, are you? I mean, my job is rough. I'm looking her in the eye every other second, especially without a junior."

"W-o-w. I didn't know you felt that way about me - about all our jobs."

"Serena! You know I don't mean it as an insult. This is a really trying time for me. Please. Just sit down. I'll make it up to you, I promise."

"E-v-e-r-y time I want a dinner out, you give me that magic line of Miranda said I could have her reservation and I'm gold."

"Oh, Serena. You know you're thinner than me."

"T-o quote you - oh, shut up Emily."

"Ha-ha. What would I do without you? I only really started to get along with Allison just before she got promoted. And before then, we were much too busy. She was on her second year as a senior, which I'm now entering into, and I was learning the ropes. I suppose it was the same with her before she got fired."

"A-n-d you never heard from her?"

"Only to give her her marching orders, from Miranda. And you know, all that couture from Paris, she got to keep it. Yeah. I heard back that she must've kept it, because this is Runway , and there's always somebody in the know, and Jeffy sleeps with everyone, and there's an upscale consignment shop - "

"B-l-e-a-r-g-h!"

" - and they saw all the couture from Paris. Yeah. And I'm guessing she sold it all and can afford to live on a tidy sum while she does, I dunno, writing or whatever bloody crap she wanted to do in the end."

"C-o-m-e on, Emily. You can hardly expect her to have returned it to you as goodwill. She'd just been fired!"

"It's the principle, Serena. I was supposed to go to Paris. I would have got to keep all that couture. Instead, she gets to go on the trip, pockets a lot from the sale of the couture, and I'm sure she's perfectly happy lounging in her boyfriend's place, chowing down on bad cuts of meat and scribbling in some diary I Heart The New Yorker ."

"O-o-h, you won't want me telling you this."

"What, what?"

"W-e-l-l. I was getting into the elevator when I saw that new junior you hired."

"So?"

"I-t was the usual song and dance Eduardo puts the new girls through. And he buzzed her through."

"Andrea?"

"Y-e-s. I think she applied for a job at Elias-Clark."

"But that's ridiculous! She'd be blacklisted! And there's an article on Page Six."

"A-c-t-u-a-l-l-y, I think that made her a minor celebrity. A lot of people who hate Miranda or were fired by her found it amusing."

"How do you know? Do you run in those circles, Serena, hmm?"

"It's just gossip. What would you think of that, if she got the job?"

"Miranda won't tolerate it."

"P-l-e-n-t-y of people who work here, there and everywhere have been fired by Miranda. It's not like she's working in the editorial department for Runway . She'd be one of us, right?"

"Oh, shut up, Serena. You know I was kidding."

"I-t still hurts, Emily. And this food - I cannot eat a bite. You know, what you said hurts, and I'd like you to apologise."

"I already did!"

"M-a-y-b-e it is my experience. It is not just you who is going through a lot."

"Why, Serena?"

"P-e-r-h-a-p-s it is that I have not met a good guy since joining Runway , or at Marshall Madden's blowout with Jeffy, or any other party he took me to. I have been around the circuit of parties and dinners and going out to bars, and I am almost a quarter of a century old."

"Oh, Serena - "

"I-'m talking. And you know, those Bergman bankers look hot, but they're as busy if not busier than even you . They'd only want one thing at one a.m. and go right back into work at three a.m."

"A man? That's all you need?"

"D-o-n-'t be ridiculous. It's likely just a spot of fun. I'm thinking of freezing my eggs, at this rate, I'll need more time to work out if a guy is suitable, if I like him, what he'll be like when we're married, and that's before he walks over and notices I'm watching him. There's so much more - but, ah, here are our second drinks. Could we have another? Thank you… "

"Serena?"

"Y-e-s. I mean, where do I want to go? Do I want to stay with Runway ? Whether it is with Miranda, or even Jacqueline, who I hear is easy to work for, if any editor-in-chief is easy to work for. Maybe I want to go to Paris and work under Briget at Runway ."

" Don't talk to me about Paris, Serena."

"T-h-e-r-e-'s a lot to consider, Emily. My landlord is always increasing the rent, and my roommates want to move out to get married, or the other one to travel overseas. My mom refuses to travel from Brazil, and when would I have the time to visit? There are younger girls I see at Runway and around and about, and I think, what are they saying? How fast they move. I have some serious competition. And then there is money, Emily. I get paid peanuts like you. There is no way I'm marrying some Bergman banker, staying up nights waiting, his salary covering what mine never will, worrying my baby will be ugly, knowing I can't take time off, never having anyone to talk to about what I'm going through."

"Serena, I didn't know you felt so strongly about this."

"W-e-l-l, sometimes working as Miranda's assistant can blind you, Emily. The world is not all Miranda and Runway . There is life out there - and you know, I almost respect her."

"Who?"

"A-n-d-r-e-a. She has - what - well, it's called chutzpah . She marched into Elias-Clark. That takes courage. And you know what, Emily. I need some courage to make a change in my life, because you see how much Jocelyn works, how tired she is, and I don't want to be a whirl of Page Six drama and many husbands. I don't know what I want! But I'm beginning to learn what I don't want. And that's scary. Because all it does is vetoes everything I know , and leaves… what? And that's the journey."

"Oh, Serena. Don't go Eat Pray Love on me."

"B-u-t I would love to go to Italy. She had twin guys there, twins , Emily."

"I don't remember that in the film… "

"O-h, please, you only watched the trailer. But in the book , Emily, in the book ."

"Would you, Serena? I'd count that as extra work."

"I-n a book , Emily, twins are more doable. Especially when you only need to imagine all their good traits, fill in the rest and ignore anything bad. That is a good book."

"Gee, submit something for Runway , why don't you? Go join Andrea at whatever bloody publication she'll show up."

"Y-o-u know what? Ah, thank you. Let us take a drink each time you mention Miranda or Runway ."

"What about the twins or B-DAD or the Book ?"

"S-e-e? Now you have to finish your drink. We should have gone to a bar, Emily. The chef is eyeing us because we're not eating anything."

"I ate the garnish , Serena, that counts. And if it was Miranda - "

"A-h! Now drink again. You can bill all this to - wait, let me sip - Elias-Clark . That counts."

"Does it? I think you've found an excuse. You can be a professional alcoholic. I've seen one of the Bergman bankers sitting on the pavement each day who's certainly going that way."

"Y-e-a-h, well. Drink up, Emily. Tomorrow you have a full day ahead. In some ways, you're lucky. In your job, you're blinded from what you'll have to do after it all."

"Serena, in a year, I'll have completed two years for her - "

"A-h, drink!"

" - and that'll be three years I've been an assistant - one sec - for her . It's the same as - one sec - what Allison did. Excuse me - another drink, please? Thank you."

"T-h-e-y-'r-e going to get suspicious, Emily."

"Oh, shut up, Serena. I wouldn't do this if I wouldn't get away with it. I'm not such a stickler for rules outside the office. At least there's no purging involved if we don't eat. And you - you'll definitely pick someone up drinking on an empty stomach."

"A-n-d you ate today?"

"Only a cube of cheese. Grab your purse and let's hit the ladies'. There's something happening, but I can't - I don't - "

"E-m-i-l-y, it's your phone."

"Who - oh my god. Hold the door for me."

"D-o you want me to hold your hair?"

"Pass me some toilet paper. Pass me the phone. It's her ."

"W-h-a-t does she want at this time of night?"

"Bleh. God knows. But I have to answer it."

"F-l-u-s-h first, Emily!"

"Hello, Miranda?"

"... t-s-k, I don't know why I bother. I hope they haven't given away our table… I see the waiter eyeing it. Yes, hello … no, we haven't left, ha-ha. No, my friend is - she's coming. I'm telling you she's coming. Ah! There she is."

"Serena."

"Y-o-u look white. You should take something."

"She wanted me to connect her with Irv."

"N-o-w? Can't she just pick up the phone and dial?"

"Let's pay. I'm not feeling so good."

"I-'l-l wager you haven't felt good in a long while."

"I don't know why she has to intrude on my time. She knows I have to deliver the Book to her each night, just like before. I do her expenses and her ordering and schlep out for Starbucks, and who knows when - "

"E-m-i-l-y. Take a deep breath. Come out onto - the sidewalk. You feel that chill?"

"Yes… "

"B-r-e-a-t-h-e in, breathe out."

"You're not helping, Serena. That or my stomach."

"Y-o-u must give yourself some timeout. Or you'll slack. You'll wind up on some therapist's couch. Remember. Some day, you will have to let Miranda go . Think about what your life will look like."

"That's easy for you to say, Serena. Taxi! Bloody hell."

"O-h, so I'm not working to get promoted? I'm just wasting time?"

"Serena, you know - "

"I think I have had enough, Emily. We are both at a crossroads. I think we'd better call it a night."

"... I'll see you, Serena. Taxi? God, thank you."

" Whar to?"

"Some other bloody place than this, I can tell you. Drive."

" Whar ?"

"Just anywhere! Aren't you listening? Oh God… "

"Wha'?"

"My stomach… can we pull over, please? Thank you… bleh. No, don't mind me. Just a Runway girl. God… a year at Runway , and more still. When will it be my turn?"

"The meter's tickin'!"