merry valentine's day or something
00.07
Yuri-O left the day after the night at the ocean. Viktor and I stayed in Hasetsu with Yuuri, which I was glad for. Being here made my boy happy and I could easily get used to this new place, this new routine. I saw my boy more often, I got to go to more places with him than I had before. And now, I also had four extra set of hands to give me lots of pets and sneak food to me. Not to even mention how happy Yuuri made my boy.
I'd gotten so used to this new place and these new people that one night, only a little bit after Yuri-O left, I unintentionally followed Yuuri as he went to his bedroom. My boy was already standing at the door to his.
Yuuri was half-way through the doorway to his room when he realized I was following him. He looked down at me, surprise shooting through him. I looked up at him, wagging my tail in anticipation for pets.
Instead, Yuuri looked back down the hall to where my boy stood in his doorway. Viktor looked between me and Yuuri. I could feel the question inside him but before he could ask it, I turned and went up to Viktor, wagging. My boy kneeled down so he could ruffle my ears, then kissed my forehead before saying, "Goodnight, Makka." I boofed in response and licked his cheek before going back over to Yuuri.
More surprise shot through Yuuri. His question remained but he didn't get a chance to ask it because my boy said, "Goodnight, Yuuri." before slowly sliding the door to his room closed. I looked up at Yuuri in anticipation.
As his shock faded, he called, "Uh, g-goodnight, Viktor."
Then he smiled down at me and reached down to pet me, ushering me into his room.
I sniffed around as he got ready for bed. He had a bag like Viktor's, that smelled of cold and ice.
When Yuuri turned out the lights and climbed into his bed, I went over to it, waiting to be invited up. When Yuuri realized this, he patted the side of the bed and I eagerly jumped up. His bed was a lot smaller but Yuuri shifted and rolled over, draping his arm over me. I relaxed, liking his energy. He still seemed quite at peace. I could feel happiness and joy buzzing inside him. There was still his usual anxiety but it didn't feel as strong now.
I turned my head and licked his cheek, getting a small laugh in response and pets, before resting my head on my paws and closing my eyes.
Yuuri's panic woke me up. Before I could tell what was going on, Yuuri had jumped up from his bed. He moved around his room incredibly fast, all while screaming and bumping into furniture and knocking over things as he changed, then he grabbed his bag that smelled like the rink and was out the door. I was still too groggy to really understand what had caused his panic or to follow him.
Instead, I rested my head back down and went back to sleep.
The routine Viktor and Yuuri kept felt a lot like Viktor and I's old routine back home during the warm period. Except the warm period in Hasetsu contained a lot more rain. Viktor and Yuuri spent a lot of their time at the rink. They'd come back to the onsen for lunch and to walk me. Sometimes they'd go out for jogs or runs, stop at some benches and do some jumps, then run back to the onsen. I almost always went with them to the rink and I always went with them on runs. When I was at the onsen, I got lots of love from Mari, Okaasan, and Otousan. Lots of love, food, and pets. It was bliss.
As this period went on, my boy's warm feelings toward Yuuri shifted, changed, blossomed. I could tell that the darkness that'd developed was still there, but it grew smaller and smaller every day we stayed in Hasetsu. It never fully disappeared as far as I could tell but those warm feelings made it basically nonexistent. Whenever my boy was with Yuuri, those warm feelings totally eclipsed that dark sadness.
Even though it felt like it rained nonstop, it wasn't rainy all the time. Some days it was clear and sunny, with puffy white clouds. Some days the first half of the day was clear, the rest of the day was rainy. Some days there were gray clouds but no rain fell. Some days the first half of the day was rainy, the rest of the day was clear. Sometimes it only cleared up when the sun began setting.
At points during the routine during this warm period, we wouldn't go to the rink or for a jog around the city. On the days when there weren't clouds and rain, we went to the ocean. They didn't swim and discouraged me from swimming, too, for some reason. Sometimes we'd run in the sand, alongside the ocean. They threw sticks for me, much to my immense enjoyment. Sometimes they'd have what they called a "picnic" and lay out a blanket like that one night we'd visited the ocean with the big group of people. Except they didn't bring those chemical sticks that made sparks.
They talked a lot during those periods. Gradually, I felt a shift in Yuuri's emotions, too. Before, it was obvious Yuuri liked my boy. And his being here made Yuuri very happy. The more time they spent together, those happy feelings morphed into feelings more similar to how my boy felt toward Yuuri, yet different somehow. But I couldn't exactly describe that difference, just that it wasn't quite how my boy felt toward Yuuri.
I wasn't sure if Yuuri was aware of his own growing feelings. His anxiety remained, though, I had a feeling that was something that would always be there, a bit like those dark feelings in my boy. But I could also feel a war within him: whether or not he wanted to open up or pull away, even when it was clear to me how my boy felt about Yuuri and how Yuuri felt about my boy.
On one particular trip to the ocean, that changed, too. The sun was low in the sky and today, for some reason, it turned everything orange. Even the ocean changed color, the sun was so bright. The clouds had only just cleared away from a whole day of rain. My boy and Yuuri had spontaneously decided to go to the ocean. I was excited to go with them, get outside, get fresh air, and stretch my legs after being inside all day.
I found the perfect stick for throwing almost as soon as we got to the ocean and dropped it at my boy's feet. Viktor and Yuuri would take turns throwing the stick for me as they walked along the sand, near the water. When the water began to come closer, I felt a mischievous spark in my boy right before he bent down and splashed Yuuri with the water as it flowed closer, then quickly receded.
My boy ran off and Yuuri chased after him. They stayed out of the water but ran close enough that they could continue splashing each other. I barked and went to join them, running around them, making sure to only get my paws wet and not completely jump into the water. I didn't want a bath tonight.
Eventually, they stopped splashing each other and began to do dancing. Not exactly with each other because they weren't really close or holding hands. But I could tell from the way they moved, they were, in a way, dancing with each other. I ran between them, jumping up and down, trying to join in their dance. Feeding off their happy energy.
At some point, my boy was the only one doing dancing. He did that sometimes, got lost in his own little world. Yuuri had stopped and I sat down next to him, feeling his emotions change as he continued to watch my boy. It was very similar to what Viktor had been feeling when he'd watched Yuuri dance around with those sparkling sticks. That warmth he already felt toward my boy was joined by a different feeling, mixing in with how Yuuri already felt. It was the same warmth, but now two kinds of love that were almost warring with each other.
It was very strange to me but the second loving feeling that'd appeared was the same as how Viktor felt toward Yuuri.
When my boy finally noticed we were a few meters away from him, he faced us and cocked his head in question. I barked and immediately ran toward him. And it was suddenly like old times, he kneeled and opened his arms, and I jumped into them, even though we were both bigger now. I knocked my boy over, showering his face with licks. He laughed and I pulled back enough to let him sit up. He put his hands in my fur and began petting my sides, cooing at me.
Yuuri joined us, having walked at a normal speed. I could still feel those warm emotions swirling inside him, making his heart beat really fast. He sat down next to us and petted my head. He was smiling but his face was red.
Now that Yuuri was starting to feel the same toward my boy as my boy felt toward him, I wondered if that meant they would finally stop pulling away from each other so much.
It had been raining for what felt like forever now. I was still able to go out and go for walks to relieve myself but they weren't nearly as long as I would've liked them to be. I barely got to go out to play or just run around. I was starting to get kind of antsy.
Which is why, on one of those very rainy days, I was a bad dog.
I didn't mean to be but I was getting restless and when I barked to relieve some of that agitation, I got in trouble. So, when a door to the outside was left open long enough, I took the opportunity to go out and stretch my legs. My boy and Yuuri were doing skating; I didn't know why I couldn't join them today. Or why I couldn't just go outside in the rain.
Sure, when it was bath time I was expected to get wet. But when I wanted to play outside in the rain, getting wet was a bad thing.
I figured I'd run to the rink and wait there for Viktor and Yuuri and we could all jog back to the onsen, like we'd done on days that weren't rainy. Unfortunately, I underestimated how much the rain had beat down and washed away the scent trails of my boy and Yuuri. I got lost pretty quickly, accidentally picking up the wrong scent trail on a river of water flowing right into a drain. Only then did I realize that the scent in the water was stale and diluted.
Everything looked different in the rain for some reason. I couldn't really recognize landmarks that would lead me to the rink or back to the onsen. For a while, I kind of just wandered, trying to pick up familiar scents that might lead me back home. When I got tired of that, I found somewhere to sit for a little bit, out of the rain. I didn't go to sleep, even though I was tired, because I didn't want to go to sleep without Viktor with me.
The rain was warm here, but as darkness fell, the air began to cool, which turned the rain cool. The rain didn't stop when it got fully dark.
I was absolutely soaked, shivering now, and starving. I considered going back to the stop I had rested, just to be out of the rain, as night wore on but I wanted to be back with my boy. I imagined he was worried about me, too, and I didn't want him to be worried.
Finding one last burst of energy, I put my nose to ground, searching for the smallest hint of my boy's scent, or Yuuri's, or someone from the onsen's, trying to look for familiar landmarks. Just when I thought I might be spending the night in the city, I caught a whiff of the smells from the onsen. Another burst of energy shot through me as I followed it. It was difficult because I would lose it every now and again because the rain kept beating it down, washing it away, but eventually, I came to a familiar building: the rink! The scent trails were stronger here, less beaten down by the rain. I wondered if that meant someone from the onsen had been around here recently.
Either way, I quickly followed the scent trail to a familiar bridge, back through city streets I'd seen before, and finally, I saw the big archway that led to the onsen. I still couldn't read the squiggles on the sign but I recognized their shape almost immediately. It also smelled strongly of the onsen.
I bounded up to the door, barking. I continued to bark and scratched at the door, excited to get to see my boy. I felt the energy spark from the humans inside, excitement growing, right before I heard rapid footsteps coming toward me. The door slid open to reveal Okaasan. I barked again, darting in and toward the stairs that I knew would lead to my boy. Okaasan yelled something after me but I didn't understand what she was saying anyway, so I ignored her, just wanting to see my boy.
I raced up the stairs, still barking, and got to the top of the stairs just as Viktor stuck his head out of his room. I felt his emotions lift and relief washed through him. I slid on the floor as I turned before tackling my boy, licking his face, wagging my tail in excitement. I inhaled his scent and marveled at his warmth as he hugged me even though I was still soaking wet.
"You had me so worried, Makkachin," he said, his arms tightening around me. When he pulled back there were tears in his eyes. "Don't you ever do that to me again, okay." He used his scolding voice but I could feel the sadness building inside him. I licked his face again, in reassurance, to tell him I was going to be a good dog and not run away again.
I could tell my boy was reluctant to let go of me but he pulled away nonetheless. Some sort of urgency filled him as he stood; I saw him pull out his phone.
Now that he wasn't hugging me, I felt that I could shake off all the water on me.
I stood and just as I started to shake, I heard Viktor exclaim, "Wait, Makka, no!" but it was too late. I was already shaking off the water. I couldn't take the coldness or heaviness any longer. I sat back down, wagging, and looked at my boy, who was standing in the doorway. Yuuri had appeared and his coat also looked soaked, his glasses had flecks of water on them. He smelled like outside and relief was rushing through him, now, too.
Usually, I got in trouble when I shook off water inside but my boy only looked at me with an amused smile, relief still coursing through him.
"I'll go get some towels," Yuuri said, brushing past Viktor and going to his room for a moment before coming back out without his coat.
"I'll come with you," Viktor said, starting to follow Yuuri but stopped.
"That's okay, you stay with Makka," Yuuri said. "I'll just be a minute."
Viktor seemed reluctant. "Are you sure?"
Yuuri smiled. "Yeah. I'll be right back." I heard his footsteps fade down the hall. Viktor stayed where he stood, looking down the hall before he looked back at me. I barked and stood, going up to him.
My boy let out a big sigh, more tears forming in his eyes. I barked again, hopping. With a huff and a smile, Viktor kneeled and ruffled my ears. I licked his cheek.
When Yuuri returned, he had a pile of towels in his hands. I was fed and then Viktor and I sat in a dry spot on the floor as he gently dried me off. Yuuri mopped up the puddles of water I had made in the hall and the mess I'd made in Viktor's room.
A tinge of concern shot through Yuuri as he carefully pressed the towels to the floor where I'd sat when Viktor hugged me and I'd still been soaking wet.
"We'll have to replace these mats," Yuuri mumbled in that different way of speaking.
"What's that?" Viktor asked.
I felt embarrassment rush through Yuuri and his face turned red but he said, "W-we'll have to replace your mats in here. Tatami mats are really finicky, especially with water."
"I'll pay for it," Viktor said immediately.
Yuuri shook his head vigorously. "No, no, that's not— You're our guest, I could never ask—"
"You don't have to," Viktor interrupted. "I'll pay for the new ones. Makka's my dog. She made the mess. I'll pay for them."
Yuuri was quiet as he stared at Viktor. Then he looked down and mumbled, "Th-thanks."
Viktor didn't respond but he did smile and I felt that warm feeling begin to fill him up again.
Mari, Okaasan, and Otousan each came to visit me, talking with Yuuri and Viktor before coming to give me a quick pat and then leaving again.
When my boy and Yuuri had finished drying everything, Yuuri gathered up all the towels. On his way out, Viktor stopped him.
"Yuuri," he said. His heartrate picked up. "I'm going to brush Makka. Do…would you like to join—help me?"
Yuuri jumped and his heartrate picked up too. His cheeks turned red as he said, "Uh, s-sure. I'd love to. Let me just, uh…get the laundry started." He disappeared down the hall.
Viktor got up and prepared two small spray bottles, mixing warm water with a different liquid he called "conditioner" before getting two brushes out and setting them beside the bottles. I started to get excited. I loved it when my boy brushed my fur. It felt nice and whenever he brushed me, I always got an extra dose of love from my boy for however long he spent brushing me. It was one of my favorite activities.
When Yuuri returned, they sat down on either side of me and began to brush through my fur. Now I had a double extra dose of love, coming from both my boy and Yuuri. Their hearts were racing again but their emotions felt like the exact opposite: fondness, calmness, peacefulness.
At some point, my boy seemed to realize something. He stopped brushing me and looked up at Yuuri for a long moment before he said, "Yuuri." His voice was quiet but nervous. Yuuri stopped what he was doing and looked up at Viktor.
"Where did you learn to brush standard poodles' fur?" my boy asked. I felt Yuuri stiffen and a wave of emotions crash over him—the first was panic and fear. Those were followed by a strange mix of positive and negative emotions. It made my head spin. But the thing was, there was a sharp edge to all of them, even the negative ones.
I felt regret shoot through my boy and when he spoke it was faster than normal, "I'm sorry, I just realized you'd started brushing Makka and I didn't have to show you how. Most people don't know how to properly brush her fur unless they've had a standard poodle themselves. You-you don't have to answer if that was too personal a question."
"I-It's okay," Yuuri mumbled, lowering his head and going back to brushing me. When he didn't say more, my boy went back to brushing me too. Their emotions weren't as relaxing now, though.
"I had a toy poodle," Yuuri said suddenly, interrupting the silence. Viktor paused and looked up before quickly going back to brushing me. I felt embarrassment rush through Yuuri as he said, "I named him Vicchan."
I felt something expand in my boy's chest. I couldn't quite describe the emotion; it was like a mix of fondness and awe and love and happiness. All I knew for sure was it was warm.
"Yuuri." My boy's voice was small yet still somehow filled with that emotion that was expanding in his chest. "I'm honored."
Yuuri ducked his head again, his face turning red but he didn't say more. I could tell Viktor wanted to know more but he didn't say anything else, either.
The whirlwind of emotions Yuuri was feeling with that sharp edge unwound a little, tapering off. I felt tension fall out of both of them as they resumed brushing my fur. After that, they'd occasionally talk, their voices quiet and lulling. I closed my eyes, enjoying being dry and warm, my stomach being full, and the atmosphere full of love. I fell asleep pretty quickly after that.
I hoped Viktor and Yuuri would brush me more often.
My boy and Yuuri had gone out one night to do something they called "nightlife." Or something to do with "nightlife." It was very unclear, but they kept saying that word. Viktor had been asking Yuuri about the nightlife for a while now, sometimes using a whining tone of voice that reminded me of my sister Yip. Yuuri seemed to think it was amusing for some reason but had only just agreed.
After a day of training, they'd come back, changed, then took me on a walk. When we got back to the onsen after that, they'd changed again and left again, saying that "nightlife" word a lot. Viktor got extremely excited about it, which made Yuuri amused but also another emotion that hadn't been there before: endearment.
I curled up on my boy's bed and took a nap after they left.
When they got back, it was dark. I felt their energy before I saw them; it was similar to how Viktor felt when we'd snuck around the house at night so many years ago. I yawned, stretched, and hopped off my boy's bed, going to the open doorway before sitting down and waiting for them. They were whispering and laughing quietly, stumbling through the dark, down the hall.
They stopped at the door to Viktor's room, smelling like alcohol. My boy's heartrate picked up as he looked at Yuuri, and those warm feelings bloomed in his chest, stronger than I'd felt from him before. I think he was trying to make some kind of big decision and it was making him extremely nervous.
"Well, I-I guess, uh…goodnight," Yuuri stuttered, his own heart racing now, too.
I think Viktor was holding his breath, even as he said, "Uh, yeah…g-goodnight, Yuuri." My boy didn't sound very confident in what he'd just said. His nervousness grew as his heartrate picked up. And his nerves were making me nervous, so without really thinking about it, I jumped up, pushing my forepaws against my boy's back. Not expecting the extra weight, Viktor stumbled forward, right into Yuuri. They both fell against the wall opposite Viktor's room with startled yelps.
Both their hearts sped out of control, and I took that as a good sign, but then Viktor pulled away, much to my confusion. I groaned and flopped down, putting my paws over my nose. I just didn't understand humans. I could tell that Viktor wanted to be with Yuuri, and I was pretty sure Yuuri wanted to be with Viktor. They both had those warm, loving feelings in their chests, directed at each other. So, what was holding them back?
"I'm sorry!" my boy exclaimed. "I didn't mean to— I wasn't expecting Makka to—"
"Th-that's okay," Yuuri said. "It was an accident."
They stared at each other for a long moment, completely silent.
"I-I'm going to bed," Yuuri said, pointing to his door. "Goodnight, Viktor." Then Yuuri turned and headed down the hall.
Viktor watched him go and said, "Goodnight, Yuuri." He stood there, staring down the hall, even after I heard the door close. Then my boy looked at me. I sat up and tilted my head to the side.
My boy glanced back down the hall before ushering me inside and sliding the door closed. He kneeled in front of me, ruffling my ears.
"That was bad, Makkachin," he whispered in the tone he used when he was scolding me. His heart was still beating really fast, though, and I could feel some kind of elation buzzing inside him, so I was getting mixed messages. "You shouldn't do that again, okay?" I boofed, not in understanding but because he'd asked me a question.
Viktor sighed and petted me more before groaning, "How am I supposed to get sleep now?"
The time following was a little weird.
It seemed okay for a while—my boy and Yuuri grew really close. Their warm feelings for each other continued to blossom. I actually found it interesting because these emotions were constantly shifting and changing in both of them but they were always warm, always loving, and always directed at each other. I think, because of that, it was complex to humans. To me, it seemed pretty simple: they loved each other.
But then, for some strange reason, Yuuri began doing that retreating thing again. Viktor would reach out, Yuuri would pull away, and my boy would then become upset. That sad ache in his chest always increasing more and more each time this happened. It felt like Yuuri was building a wall, like he was trying to suppress his growing feelings toward Viktor.
There was also a big decision Yuuri was trying to make and he seemed to be having trouble with it. He spent nights in his room, the door tightly shut, but I could often hear him moving around. Sometimes he'd groan. I could feel his emotions shift and change: annoyance, frustration, sometimes anger. It felt similar to what my boy had experienced leading up to that dark sadness taking over his heart. I hoped that Yuuri wouldn't go through the same thing.
Yuuri pulled away a lot throughout one day in particular, and I was extremely concerned for my boy when he left that morning for the rink, before Yuuri had even woken up. The night before hadn't been very good for Viktor. I wished he didn't have to leave to do skating, given his mood, but at least I was able to go with him to the rink this time.
I sat next to his bike, waiting for Yuuri to arrive but he never did. Eventually, my boy exited the rink. He had that serious, silent talking look on his face again. He gave my head a pat before he took the bike away from the wall. Instead of getting on it, however, he pushed it all the way back to the onsen. I walked beside him, keeping close. I found he liked it when I occasionally brushed up against him as we walked, especially when his mood was low.
As we entered the onsen and walked up to Yuuri's room, I felt Viktor's mood shift. It was a mix of weird disappointment, annoyance, and determination. I could feel Yuuri's emotions as soon as we got to the top of the stairs—his anxiety was bad now and I could feel guilt bursting inside him.
My boy had never been in Yuuri's room, that I knew anyway. If the door was closed but Yuuri wasn't there, he never went near it. When Yuuri was in there, he'd always knocked. This morning was different. Viktor strode right up to it and opened it up. I sat down at his feet, wondering what was going on. It wasn't like Yuuri to not show up to do skating, and it wasn't like Viktor to invade his space like this.
They were both silent for a moment before Viktor smiled, tramping down on his irritation.
"Good morning, Yuuri," he said. "Why don't we take a break from training and go down to the ocean."
For some reason, Yuuri's anxiety grew as he slowly turned to look at Viktor and mumbled, "…okay."
I wagged, standing and pacing in place, when I heard the word "ocean." I loved the ocean. Maybe this would also help with both their moods. They enjoyed going to the ocean, enjoyed being with each other, and always went back to the onsen feeling calm.
"I'll give you a few minutes to get dressed," Viktor said. "I'll be waiting downstairs, outside, okay?" My boy closed the door again before Yuuri could say anything else. He took of his jacket and threw it onto his bed as we passed his room before we went back downstairs. We then went and waited outside the onsen.
Yuuri came down after a little bit. His anxiety wasn't so strong but it had been replaced by a sad calmness. He kept his head low and hunched his shoulders a little. The walk to the ocean was very quiet. Viktor had that silent talking look on his face but would occasionally glance over at Yuuri. Today was warm, and there were a lot of clouds out, but it hadn't started raining yet. The sun peaked through small gaps in the clouds.
When we got to the ocean, we walked in the sand until we got to a small drop-off.
"Let's sit here for a minute," my boy said, looking over at Yuuri.
Yuuri nodded and mumbled, "Sure." avoiding Viktor's gaze.
They both sat. I laid down between them and my boy draped his arm over me. It remained quiet between them. Yuuri sat curled up, much like his emotions. He was pulling away today more than I'd felt him pull away before. And I wondered what happened. I could tell, beneath all his anxiety, there was a part of him that wanted to open up more but something was stopping him.
After some moments of silence, some birds flew by, calling to each other. I didn't understand birds. They seemed pretty useless. I liked chasing them around because they always flew off, but then they would stupidly go back to the spot I had just chased them away from.
"Oh, seagulls," my boy said. I could feel his emotions shift again, feel him tentatively reaching out.
"They're black-tailed gulls," Yuuri mumbled. I felt my boy relax slightly, venturing out further.
"Ever since I came here, I'm reminded of St. Petersburg when I hear seagulls early in the morning," Viktor said. "I never thought I'd leave that city, so I never used to notice the seagulls' cries. Do you ever have times like that?" My boy waited, holding his breath. When Yuuri began to speak, I felt him relax even more. I could also feel some kind of giddy hope growing inside of him, and relief.
"There was a girl in Detroit," Yuuri began, "who was really pushy and kept talking to me. One time, a rink mate got into an accident. I was pretty torn up with worry. I was in the hospital waiting room with that girl. When she hugged me to comfort me, I shoved her away without thinking about it." Even though Yuuri stayed wrapped up in a ball, I could feel him tentatively reaching out emotionally, toward Viktor.
I tried not to wag in excitement. For the first time since we'd come here, they weren't pulling away from each other!
"Wow," my boy said. "Why?"
Yuuri's emotions shifted to something like frustration, maybe even anger as he said, "I didn't want her to think I was feeling shaken. I felt like she was intruding on my feelings or something, and I hated it. But then I realized that Minako-sensei, Nishigori, Yuko-chan, and my family never treated me like the weakling that I am. They all had faith that I'd keep growing as a person, and they never stepped over the line."
Something Yuuri had said made Viktor angry, not at Yuuri. It was more general. Still, Viktor's voice stayed neutral as he responded, "Yuuri, you're not weak. No one else thinks that, either." My boy paused. I felt his heartrate pick up. "What do you want me to be to you? A father-figure?"
"No."
My boy's heart started to pick up speed. "A brother, then? A friend?"
Yuuri made a noise that sounded like a no and my boy's heart began racing out of control. I would have been worried but he acted normal. Besides, this had been a common occurrence with him and Yuuri, both, ever since Viktor and I had arrived here.
"Your boyfriend, then?" Viktor asked. "Guess I'll do my best."
Yuuri leaped up, his anxiety and heart leaping with him, starling me, and exclaimed, "No, no, no, no, no!" I looked over at him, concerned. I felt a small sharp pain in my boy's chest but whatever Yuuri said next relieved it altogether, "I want you to stay who you are, Viktor! I've always looked up to you. I ignored you because I didn't want you to see my shortcomings. I'll make it up to you with my skating!"
In fact, what Yuuri said did more than relieve that pain. I felt my boy's emotions lift and that warm emotion begin to fill him up again.
"Okay," Viktor said. "I won't let you off easy, then. That's my way of showing my love."
For once, that I was aware of, Yuuri's anxiety weakened at my boy's words. And I felt a calm happiness wash over him, followed by determination.
Viktor stood and they took each other's hands as the sunlight broke through the clouds.
That night, I could tell Yuuri had finally figured out whatever it was he had been working on. His spirits and emotions lifted, chasing away the frustration and annoyance. My boy was also feeling better, too, for which I was happy about. Whatever they had discussed at the beach had changed how they approached each other. It was still tentative but I hoped that meant they'd finally act on those warm feelings they always got around each other now, instead of holding back like they had been for a while now.
as always, i hope you enjoyed! comments are much appreciated ^_^
thank you for reading,
thebrightestnight