~Authors Note~
Hey everyone! Warning for this chapter, it is kinda dark. Trigger warning for abuse, abusive relationships, gaslighting, and verbal and physical abuse. As I'm sure most people have been able to tell, Pixie and Mayumi's relationship is unhealthy and this chapter really delves into that. Nothing super gorey or anything, just something that might be emotionally heavy! Thank you, and I hope you all enjoy 3
The followup meeting with Ozpin had been short and sweet, and the entire team had left with a feeling of pride in their chests, none more joyful than Pixie. It made Mayumi unbearably happy to see Pixie finally out of her slump. Ever since Ozpin's first chastisement, Pixie had been irritable and unusually snappish. Everything felt better when Pixie was in a good mood.
Now, Mayumi is walking towards team GLCR's dorm room, her textbooks clutched to her chest. Getting away from Pixie had been easier than she had initially thought, as her partner had left to go talk with the janitor, again. Pixie has immersed herself in trying to befriend the man during her time off, giving Mayumi a sense of freedom she had never before known. This doesn't stop her stomach from twisting with guilt as she approaches the dorm room door, and places her hand on it. Pausing, Mayumi steadies her breath and reminds herself that Pixie is busy, and that she isn't going to stop her. Besides, what's so bad about visiting Clover?
Mayumi peeks inside, glancing around. The room was empty except for the desks and beds, and she assumes the rest of his team was off doing things. Narcissa, she imagines, is out prowling the school grounds, though she can't fathom where Vira or Cerna are. Perhaps they're in Clover's pocket as well! The thought makes her smile. Despite her original misgivings about Cerna, he had been very kind to her while playing Clover's game, so she was willing to accept him as a friend. A study group with the four of them would be fun.
The door closes behind her. No sooner than it does, she notices that there's a second door in the wall at the head of one of the beds. She recognizes it from the night before initiation and approaches, shifting her textbooks to one arm so that she can knock.
It's answered immediately.
"Mayumi! You made it! Pixie didn't come with, right?" he asks, peeking his head out to look around the room.
"No, she's not here. It's, uh, just me!" Mayumi responds with a smile. Clover ushers her in.
"Good! I mean, not that she's bad or anything, I don't really know her, just that I was really hoping it would just be you. And it is. So that's great," Clover says. Mayumi follows him deeper into the pocket, setting her stuff down on the table as she goes.
"I brought my Econ books. Are we going to be studying that? I'm really having trouble with it. It's mostly numbers, and those are really confusing," Mayumi explains. Clover pauses, turning around with a whirl, his eyes locking on her books on the table.
"Oh! Yeah. Studying. That..." Clover moves towards the table and sits down, sliding into his seat with a distinct lack of grace. Mayumi slowly sits, her brow cocked. Clover was acting awfully strange, just like he had been after the sparring match. Was he still scared of her?! The thought makes her twist with guilt.
"Clover, you don't have to be scared of me," The words tumble from her mouth. Clover's face flushes, his brows knotting.
"I'm not scared of you," he explains.
"Why are you acting so strangely?" she asks, her guilt and fear being replaced with confusion.
"I'm not!" he snaps back defensively, inhaling sharply. "I mean, I'm not," he responds, much calmer.
"Okay. Sorry…" she mumbles, turning toward the textbook on the table.
"No, Mayumi, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you. Here, let's look at your econ. Let's see, we're learning about freelance huntsmen, right? What do you remember from lecture…"
The two of them delve into her textbook, Clover looking over her shoulder, pointing at diagrams within the pages that highlight his points. Mayumi finds his voice to be strangely soothing. It was warm, laced with a rasp that was barely noticeable unless you were paying close attention. He spoke cleanly, with only the occasional stumbling, and exuded a confidence that didn't put her down. Instead, it seemed to call to her, pull her up onto her feet. He wasn't just confident in himself, he was confident in her, and her abilities. The thought made her smile.
"What's the difference in how contracted and freelance huntsmen are paid?" he asks, shutting the book.
"Contracted huntsmen sign contracts, which means they get paid a wage. Freelance huntsmen work on their own, and get paid per mission. They have more freedom in what jobs they can take, which is why most people like freelance work," Mayumi shoots back.
"What causes the pay to drop in the summer for freelance workers?" Clover leans forward.
"Huntsmen graduating! They fill up the mission boards and don't mind being paid less!" Mayumi exclaims in response.
"What do people in low income areas do to pay for huntsman?" Clover asks. Mayumi wrinkles her nose, the answer slipping. Clover slowly points to himself.
"Oh! In Menagerie, you said they paid your parents by letting them eat and stay in the hotels for free." Mayumi beams proudly, recalling what Clover had explained while reading the textbook with her.
"Good job. I think you'll do just fine on the next quiz." Clover pauses. "Have I given you a tour of my pocket yet?" he asks. Mayumi shakes her head.
"No. I've only seen this room. The…kitchen?" she asks, glancing around the open area. In a room next to them, separated only by a quarter of a wall, there was a couch and a T.V. Clover nods.
"Yeah, though I'd call this the 'living area' since there's a lot more to it. I also have a bedroom, a garage...even a workshop on the roof," he offers.
"Wow...it must be a lot bigger than I thought," she murmurs.
"Yeah! It's pretty big," he says proudly, standing up with a flourish. He offers a hand and Mayumi takes it, standing up.
"Come on. I'll show you around." Clover keeps hold of her hand, leading her away from the table. She follows, happily catching up with him. Together, they mosey throughout the house with the occasional gesture and explanation from Clover. Mayumi says very little, intent on taking in the details of every room, so that she'll have a chance of remembering it later. She wonders if she'll be back, and promises herself that she will. Even if Pixie doesn't like Clover, Mayumi's sure that she does, and within her a desire to spend more time with him rises. She clutches his hand tightly.
"Are you okay? That hurts," Clover says with a laugh. She loosens her grip.
"Yeah, sorry. Just was thinking about stuff," she responds.
"What kind of stuff?"
Mayumi answers with silence.
"You don't have to talk about it, if you don't want." Clover pauses, glancing at Mayumi. "Here, the last place to show you is the roof," he adds.
Clover goes first, followed by Mayumi. The wood of the ladder is scuffed from frequent use and she has to be careful in order to avoid splinters. In one motion, Clover pushes a trap door open and pulls himself up. Mayumi follows, blinking as her eyes adjust to the light.
Mayumi feels her heart catch in her throat. The sky is green! A mix of pale tones with deep, leafy hues speckled with tiny stars of white. Well, the milky spots of white only look like stars, even if she knows that there's no way for them to be. This isn't the sky, it's green, not blue. Stars are only in the sky, so these can't be the real deal.
She reaches up, only to find the ceiling out of reach. Clover walks over and gently pushes her hand down.
"You know, if you let me pick you up...you'd probably be able to touch it. Just saying," he says, shoving his hands in the pockets of his coat in an attempt to appear nonchalant. She turns towards him with a flury, bouncing on the balls of her feet.
"Really?"
"Yeah. Just, be careful, ok?" Clover crouches down. With her initial excitement fading, Mayumi suddenly reconsiders her decision. Pixie would hate her should she find out she was doing such a thing! It is bad enough she was breaking so many rules already. She wags her head and takes a step back, her knees quivering. Clover's eyes widen and he quickly stands, confusion swimming in his eyes.
"Are you ok?" he asks, kneeling in front of her, his eyes finally able to meet hers. They were a lovely shade of green, matching the walls of his semblance.
"Pixie wouldn't want me to do that," she murmurs, crossing her arms over her chest. Clover tilts his head.
"Do what? My pocket won't hurt you, I can promise that." Clover chuckles nervously, his smile thinly veiling his discomfort. "Besides, Pixie is just your team leader. You can do some stuff just because...you want to," Clover says.
"You don't understand," Mayumi starts, the words fumbling in her mouth. No one's ever told her not to listen to Pixie. Ivan's rule was that she always had to listen to Pixie, unless he gave her a different order.
"Well, why don't you make me understand?" Clover asks, his voice strained with impatience.
Mayumi feels her stomach drop. She doesn't know how to make him understand. Since coming to Beacon, it has been getting harder and harder for her to understand Pixie's rules. After all, why couldn't she be close to Clover? Why couldn't she touch the pocket's roof? Why not? Why did Pixie have such...stupid rules! She likes being around Clover. She likes being here! She likes his help, and she likes his company.
"You do not have to understand," she finally murmurs, standing up. Her heart slams against her rib cage with such force she fears her ribs will crack. "It's silly, anyways. Can I touch the ceiling?" she asks eagerly, a hunger in her belly. For the first time that she could remember, she wanted to purposefully break Pixie's rules, just to spite her.
Clover blinks in surprise, and crouches low again. Mayumi eagerly climbs onto his shoulders, wrapping an arm over his neck, squeezing.
"Hey! Be careful," he chokes out, patting her arm. She quickly loosens her grip, her face flushing at her brashness.
"S-sorry!" she sputters. Clover stands, hoisting her up with him.
"Ok. Are you high enough?" he asks.
"Yeah!" Mayumi pauses. "Are you okay? You sure I'm not heavy?" Mayumi asks, glancing down at him, her brows furrowed with concern.
"Mayumi, I'm a huntsmen who throws giant metal shields, and you, no offense, are tiny. Yes, I am sure that you are not too heavy." He chuckles.
Mayumi tears her eyes away from him, stretching her hand out to touch the smooth, green surface. There were no ridges. No cracks, no divots, and it emitted heat as though it were a living body. In fact, she could almost feel it pushing into her palm, like the flank of a breathing animal.
"It's like it's alive," she murmurs, Clover lowering her back down to the ground. Once she dismounts, he rolls his shoulders.
"It's made of my aura, so it's kind of alive. Hardly sentient, but kinda like a plant. It doesn't think, but it's alive."
"What happens when your aura breaks? My semblance stops working...does yours die?" she asks, feeling a pang in her heart at the thought of such a thing happening.
"Kinda, it stops working. I can't get in, but it comes back as soon as my aura does. It's a lot more like it's sleeping," he explains evenly. This comes as a relief to Mayumi. Sleeping was so much better than death. Tearing her gaze from the ceiling, she takes the time to actually look over the roof. To one side of it sat a workbench and a scattered collection of tables.
"Oh! What's all that stuff over there?" she asks eagerly.
"That's the workshop, that's actually what I wanted to show you, but you seemed really interested in the ceiling, so I was letting you enjoy that," Clover explains.
"Thank you," she answers sincerely. "I have to get going, but next time I come visit you'll have to show me your workshop, okay?" she asks. Clover smiles.
"Sounds great. Remember to bring your textbooks with!"
At the word "textbooks" Mayumi's gone, hurrying down the hatch off of the roof.
~Scene break~
The forest is peaceful today. There's hardly a breath of wind, and a cool, crispness is in the air. Vira's quite content with it, the stillness and the quiet. Not a Grimm in sight, only plenty of small critters and fluttering birds dashing through the treetops above her. She's able to enjoy the company of her team, walking alongside Cerna, and the group they are partnered with. Team Tulip, a collection of young girls the year senior to them.
"Oh, darling, you just have to try this scent. I know you didn't like the lemon oils, but this lavender smell is to die for," a young woman oozes to Narcissa, pulling a bottle from the bag on her shoulders. Narcissa bites back a snarl, glaring daggers at her companion.
"Oh Peony, my name is Lavender! I don't think she'd die for me," A second girl chipped in, giggling at her own joke as she twirls a pale strand of violet hair. "I'm sure you'll like that smell, you like me, don't you?" she pleads. Tawnya, the team leader of the group, shoves her way between Peony and Narcissa, tossing harsh looks towards her teammates. Vira laughs. The two girls simply start to chat about their essential oils on their own, swapping scents as if the whole interaction had never happened. It seems as though their memories are just as bad as Vira's, though she doesn't know what their excuse is.
"Sorry about them, they're airheads. I told them not to bring those stupid bottles of oil, but they did it anyways," Tawnya mutters. Narcissa scoffs.
"Sounds like a discipline issue, that's on you," she shoots back.
"I know how to discipline my team," Tawnya responds, her tongue just as sharp. Narcissa falls into silence, and Vira turns to talk to Cerna and Clover instead.
"It's really peaceful," Vira ventures, tilting her head to look up at Cerna. He felt so far away, with his head up so high, nestled on such broad shoulders. Cerna nods, scratching at his beard. An ear flickers.
"Yes, but that can change quickly," he responds in a soft, rumbling tone. Vira likes his voice. Even if it comes out as a growl, he speaks with such gentleness that she knows she's safe around him.
"That's ok, with everyone here, we'll be fine no matter what," Vira assures him, patting one of his enormous hands. "I trust you'll keep me safe," she says brightly, offering her best smile. Cerna blinks, casting a glance her way, only to lock his eyes on the road ahead.
"I'll try my best," he grumbles in response. Vira studies his expression, her heart sinking when she finds that it's the same as always, thoughtful and collected, not particularly happy.
"O-oh, yeah, I know you will," she mumbles, turning away from him.
"Hey, I'll protect you too!" Clover adds, and Vira gives him a nervous smile. Clover is easy to talk to, however Cerna's quite the challenge. She bites her lip, wrinkling her brows to muster up her courage, ready to go at it again.
"You're from Mistral, right? So am I! What part are you from?" she says brightly, flashing Cerna another one of her cheery smiles.
"Northern Mistral," he murmurs.
"Northern Mistral...I don't remember if I've been there." Vira frowns, realizing how stupid it was of her to ask such a question. It's not like she remembered anything about Mistral, let alone the specific regions.
"It's cold," Cerna starts. "Very cold, my family raised sheep. Do you remember being somewhere with sheep?" he asks, turning towards her. His gaze is gentle, but beyond that she cannot glean anything else. She turns her focus to trying to recall a place with sheep.
Closing her eyes, she thinks hard. Pushing through the fog in her mind is impossible, and all she can see is a dark wall. If she had been somewhere with sheep, the memories were locked away, or not there at all.
"No, I don't. I guess I've never been there," she responds cheerfully. For a moment, she sees pity swimming in Cerna's eyes, but then it's gone; replaced with that peaceful look of his. She's grateful for this. To Vira, being pitied stings like a slap to the face. It's better to make someone happy, to make them smile, than to fill them with pity. Besides, by morning, she'll forget whatever it is he's pitying her for, she just knows it.
"Too bad, it's a lovely place. You should come visit someday, see my family's sheep," he says. Vira smiles hearing him talk. He really did have such a wonderful voice.
"I would love to! Oh, Narcissa-" Vira stops. No, they won't be able to go visit Cerna's family. They have a different mission, don't they? Vira can't remember what it is, but she has it written down in her journal back at Beacon. Whatever it is, it probably doesn't have any room for visiting Cerna.
"What was that?" Cerna asks, urgency in his voice. "What about her?" Vira shakes her head.
"Only that she doesn't like the cold, so I don't think we'll be able to go visit. Thank you for the offer," she says, starting to hum a tune of unknown origins. Cerna falls silent, his gaze growing thoughtful once more.
Clover hugs himself, mocking a shiver.
"Understandable. I hate the cold, too. Honestly, I don't know how you put up with living in such a cold place," Clover says. Vira turns towards Clover, reaching out and patting his arm.
"Cerna probably likes the cold, with all the hair he has. You don't really have any," she says light-heartedly.
"It's not my fault that I can't grow a beard!" Clover shoots back. Vira's eyes widen with shock.
"That's not what I meant! You look better without one, anyways!"
"Are you saying I can't pull it off?" he wails. Vira panics, fumbling over her words.
"W-well, it's not like I know you can't pull it off, it's just, you look so good without one! I don't think you'd need one! You know, it's just that-"
"Beards aren't for everyone." Cerna chuckles, patting Clover's shoulder. "My whole family is full of bearded men, some people just can't grow 'em, and that's ok."
Clover calms down, though he continues to stroke his chin longingly.
Vira looks up at Cerna, mouthing a small thank you, to which the giant nods, the smallest of smiles tugging at his lips.
"Can you tell me more about your home?" Vira asks, bounding after him.
"Other than it being cold and full of sheep farmers? Not really," he says.
"Oh...well then, tell me about your family!" she asks cheerfully. "Did you have a mom and a dad, did you have any siblings? Did you have any pets! Besides the sheep, of course," she asks, her voice full of bubbly joy. Cerna takes a moment to respond, as if he's mulling over his response. Finally, he opens his mouth and answers in a slow, methodical, way. It's as though he's pulling the memories up out of deep water, as a crab fisherman pulls up his traps.
"I had a mother and a father, and many siblings. There were eight of us."
"Eight of you?" Clover asks. "I can barely handle the one sister," he jokes.
Vira falls silent in shock. She doesn't have any siblings. It had always been her, Narcissa, Mayumi, and Pixie. They were a lot like sisters, she supposes, though none of them were actually related.
"Yes, there were eight of us. We ran the farm together, herding sheep and keeping Grimm away. My father and my older brothers taught me how to fight," he explains, gesturing to his gauntlets.
"Were all your siblings boys?" Vira asks, tilting her head. If only she had her book! By the time they get back, she'll forget all this new information about Cerna! How rude would that be.
"Nearly all of them, I had one sister. She was the youngest of us, and mom's favorite. Her name was Hilde," he answers, his eyes shining with joy. Everything about his face seems to lift when he talks of his sister. His cheeks, his lips, and his brows, so that his entire face is painted brighter.
"Hilde is a pretty name," Vira remarks, patting Cerna's arm. He glances down at her, lifting up a great hand and resting it on her head. Carefully, he pats it twice.
"It is." He pauses. "So is Vira," he answers, chuckling. Vira feels her cheeks burn.
"T-thank you. Cerna is a really pretty name too," she answers, suddenly realising that Cerna isn't exactly feminine. What if he didn't like being called pretty? "I mean, a handsome name. C-cerna's a very handsome name!" she stutters. He looks away, sneaking a glance towards her. Beneath his beard, she can see that his smile hasn't faded. She must have done something right, if he was still smiling.
"I'm glad you think it's pretty," he responds in a low grumble.
"Hey, Narcissa! We're almost back where we started, I think we can call this perimeter check good!" a shrill voice calls from ahead of them, and Vira glances towards it. Izzy, a spikey-haired girl covered in porcupine quills from team Tulip, is roughly bumping against Narcissa.
"Yeah, I know that. You don't need to point out the obvious." Narcissa has to bite back a snarl. Vira felt her heart twist in pity. This was not the kind of work Narcissa liked. Hanging out with people, having to pretend to be their friend, it isn't something that comes easily to Narcissa. Without a second glance at Clover and Cerna, Vira catches up with Narcissa, and pushes her way between her and Izzy. Vira reaches out, snagging Narcissa's hand.
"That means we're almost done, right! Then we can go back to the dorm rooms and rest," Vira assures her partner, patting Narcissa's pale hand.
"Aw, does that mean you won't be coming to hang out with us? We were going to go get something to eat in Vale," Izzy pouts.
"It'll be great, you seem like you don't get out much," Peony says in a slow, methodical voice, as though she's already drifting away from the conversation.
"Guys, leave them alone. They probably don't want to put up with all of you," Tawnya snaps. Narcissa and her exchange glances, Narcissa giving the girl a grateful nod. Vira goes back to rubbing Narcissa's hand, hoping to soothe her.
Sure enough, within a few minutes they're back at the entrance to the village. Not a single Grimm in sight.
"Well, that was a pretty successful perimeter check," Tawnya says, reaching her arms over her head in a stretch.
"I suppose it was." Narcissa responds through gritted teeth. The red haired woman sits down at the base of a nearby tree and Vira follows suit, finding herself content to watch Narcissa poke at the spools of wire on her wrists. Lavender and Peony approach, only to be met with a sharp glare. This doesn't stop them from sitting down, pulling out some essential oils, and pestering Narcissa until the airship arrives.
~Scene break~
No one was going to help her, not in all of Vale, and Mayumi wonders if she even deserves it. She gasps for air, tumbling across the alley way, her back slamming into a nearby wall. Pain spirals up her back, bruises already forming beneath her skin. The urge to engage her aura, heal the wounds, is strong, but she resists. It will not help her cause to anger Pixie further by doing so.
"Who was it? Clover, was that his name?" Pixie reaches down with a snarl and yanks Mayumi up by her hair, dangling Mayumi inches from her face. Mayumi stays silent, her body shaking. Every inch of skin quivers and her very bones rattle with fear.
"Answer me!" Pixie shrieks, tossing the young girl to the ground. Mayumi's body falls limp, sharp stones digging into her skin with a stinging burn. The only answer Mayumi can muster is a tiny shake of her head as she attempts to push herself onto her hands and knees. A boot slams onto the base of her spine, followed by a tugging on her tail.
Why does Pixie need to know who she had been with? There's no way she doesn't recognize Clover's scent. Can't she just give Mayumi her punishment, and get this all over with? Clover doesn't need to be involved at all.
Her lungs collapse as Pixie raises her boot, and slams it into Mayumi's ribs. Mayumi curls her tail over herself in fear, hugging it tightly as tears sting her eyes. Pleas build in her stomach and die on her tongue, only quiet murmurings escaping. The roots of her hair strain against her scalp and she's face to face with Pixie's bright, blue eyes once again.
"Do I need to throw you again?"
"No." Mayumi's lower lip quivers. She can feel the blood running down her shoulders and stomach, hitting the ground with a steady drip.
"You'd rather me stop, right?" Pixie soothes. "You want me to set you down, you can heal yourself up, we'll go home to Gabriel and Randy. You want that, right?" Pixie asks, her free hand stroking Mayumi's darkened cheek.
Mayumi replies with a tiny nod. A sharp slap is Pixie's response.
"Why'd you do it?" Pixie seethes.
Do what? Talk to Clover? He was her friend, what exactly had she done? In a moment of spite, Mayumi gives a sharp retort.
"I want to have friends," she responds. Before she can recognize her mistake, her organs crumble beneath Pixie's fist and she has to hold back vomit. Bright flashes swim in her vision and she tastes iron in her mouth, thick against her tongue. It tastes vile, and she wants nothing more than to spit the disgusting stuff out. The pain, however, is only second to the distress painted on Pixie's face.
Pixie's gargled cry tears Mayumi's eardrums and strikes her heart with guilt. There are tears in the pink haired woman's eyes, streaming down her cheeks and dripping onto her dress.
"Am I not good enough for you? You're so selfish! Do you even think about what I want? What I need? You're just going to leave me like that! Go with him?" Pixie shrieks, her fingers tearing at her pink pigtails. Mayumi pushes herself up. Despite her shaking legs, she staggers closer to her partner and reaches up, grasping the woman's wrists.
"Please don't hurt yourself," Mayumi mutters. The guilty pit in her stomach hurts more than the beating. Pixie was hurting herself again, and Mayumi can't help but think it's her fault. "I'm sorry, please don't do this to yourself. Here, let go of your hair," she whispers as she chokes back tears.
Pixie sniffles. Then, in a flourish, she relents and pulls Mayumi into a hug. For a long moment, they hold this embrace without any sound to interrupt it. The pain of Mayumi's wounds fade to the back of her mind as Pixie's weight pushes against her, promising her that everything will be okay. It was over. A dull golden light engulfs the young faunus, and slowly her aura begins to heal her wounds.
"Promise me you won't talk to him?" Pixie whispers, her fingers running through Mayumi's ponytail with gentle strokes. "Promise me that I'll be enough for you?"
Pixie's breath washes over Mayumi's neck and her heart stops. No was not an option, but that word danced on her lips. Pixie squeezes her desperately, as if sensing Mayumi's trepidation.
"Y-yes I promise," Mayumi stutters, terrified to shatter the peace after just achieving it. Pixie's body tenses, like a snake around its prey.
She knows Mayumi's lying.
"Do you?" she whispers, blue eyes growing cold. Pixie lets go of Mayumi and takes a step back, her hands balling into fists.
"I do!" Mayumi cries, stumbling back to avoid a strike, her hands flying up to shield her face. "I promise! I really do promise!" she pleads, tears freely flowing and mixing with the dried blood on her cheeks.
Pixie regards her, then pulls her into another hug.
"I believe you."
Guilt sinks its predatory fangs into Mayumi's heart.
"Do you know why I believe you?" Pixie whispers.
"W-why?" Mayumi asks, her voice trembling.
"Because you'd never lie to me, that would be selfish of you. You aren't selfish, are you?"