Clarke's P.O.V

Have you lost someone that you loved so much that it killed you once they were gone? You saw them even when you knew they were not there and no matter how much you remind yourself that they are gone...they won't go away. Bellamy disappeared 6 months ago and there has been no trace of him, for the first 3 months I looked nonstop until I couldn't anymore, I never got to tell him how much I loved him and I wish I had but it's too late now.

I am running camp by myself now and I miss him so much...Monty, Jasper, Murphy, Harper, and all of my other friends think he was taken by Lexa...my ex-girlfriend. I broke up with her because it was either I move my camp closer to her or I leave my camp completely...she also wanted me to stop talking to Bellamy all together. It wasn't worth it, I'd rather still talk to Bellamy and run this camp with him then be with her, but would she really take him away from me like that. Octavia sometimes still goes out and looks for him when she is missing him the most, I would go with her but I have the camp to run and I know every time she goes...she comes back with nothing, and I can't put myself through that.

We're having a little celebration for Monty and Jasper because it's another year of them being friends and it's an excuse to drink moonshine and party. I wish I could say that I will for sure have fun but I can't because my best friend and the man I love isn't here with me, he isn't here to make me smile and have a good time so I don't know if I will without him. I go out to the med bay to see how the sick are holding up, they are doing okay and hopefully they will be out of the bay soon, I have even more work since Bellamy disappeared and I wish I had him, I wish I could find him, and I wish I could have told him how I felt about him.

Jasper comes into the med bay and asks "hey, are you okay?"

"Yeah Jas I'm just busy and I miss Bellamy" I tell him.

"I know you miss him, we all do but you need a break...come to the party tonight and calm down, relax"

"How can I relax when Bellamy's gone"

How can I be able to relax when the one person I love the most has been missing for 6 months and no one…not a single person has been able to find any trace of him. How can you disappear without a trace like that? How could he disappear at all? It's funny to think about now because he used to hate me and he thought I most likely hated him but the truth is that I never hated him even when I wanted to…I never could. When we first met I didn't like him very much and I have never lied about that but as time went on things changed and when he wasn't around I wanted him around and when he was around I never wanted him to leave. He just disappeared and no one found anything that could show where he went or what happened to him. Why was he taken from me? Why was he taken at all?

"Clarke, I know you miss him but we all do" Jasper says to me.

"I don't just miss him, I loved him and I needed him, I knew if I had him by my side then I could do this life thing but without him I don't think that I can" I say to Jasper as I cry to him.

"You loved him?"

"Yes, I fell in love with him and now he is gone"

"Are you suicidal?"

"It's not the fact I want to die, it's the fact that I don't want to live without him"

"I think he's still alive Clarke" he says as he puts his hand on my shoulder. "If he wasn't and someone took him because he disappeared without a trace they would have sent his body back on a silver platter"

"You still think Lexa did this?" I asked him.

"You broke up with Lexa and Lexa knew how Bellamy felt for you, god everybody knew how he felt about you, anyway and she was jealous because she knew he had a shot with you and that she lost her chance"

"How did he feel for me?"

"It's not my place to tell you Clarke, but what I can tell you is that he cared for you a lot more than anyone else"

"More than O?"

"He cares about you in a completely different way, so in a way…yeah"

Bellamy's P.O.V

6 months. It's been 6 months since I was taken, and it has been 6 months since I saw Clarke, O, Jasper, Monty, Murphy, and everyone else. I am worried about all of them and I know they are worried about me or they think I'm dead, I have been locked in a cage for 6 months and I don't know why they are keeping me alive. I don't know who is behind this but I have a feeling that it's Clarke's ex girlfriend Lexa, she never liked me and she never will and because Clarke broke up with her she thinks I have a shot and she knows that she doesn't have a shot with Clarke anymore. I hate not knowing if they are okay, I hate not knowing if Clarke is okay and I wish I knew and I wish I knew O was okay as well. Everything was almost perfect and then someone kidnapped me and held me in a cell for 6 months, I almost had the guts to tell Clarke how I feel about her and then someone knocked me out and when I woke up I'm in a cell.

All I want is to be able to make it home to Clarke and finally hold her in my arms again and tell her how I feel without chickening out, because that is all I want to do. I never got the chance to tell her when she was right in front of me because I was scared but I'm tired of being scared, I just want to be able to tell her and I hope she feels the same for me. I have been trying to find ways out of the damn cell and I can't find a way, they feed me every 2 days and give me a cup of water everyday then they leave and don't come back until the next day.

Why are they keeping me alive? What is the reason they want me alive? What am I of value to them? All these questions I have and none are answered because I don't know who is doing this all I have is what I believe which I could be wrong. As I am thinking of who could be keeping me in a cell making sure I am fed and have water after they kidnapped me for some reason one of the guards came in.

He opens my cell and says nothing, he ties my hands behind my back and we walk across a courtyard and into a tower. Why didn't they blindfold me? I don't know but because they didn't I know where I am and I know who is behind this and I was right it was…Lexa, I am in Polis.

They sit me in front of a throne and all I have is a fucking smile on my face because this is funny as hell that she kidnapped me just to keep me in a cell to make my people and the people I love think I am dead. "Welcome Bellamy," Lexa says to me.

"What the fuck is this? You kidnapped me just to keep me in a cell for 6 months…long enough to make my people and the people I love think I am dead and for what?"

"So I can bring you back alive and she will take me back"

"Oh wow…so this is about Clarke"

"Who would it be about? Of course it's about Clarke and when I take you back to your people you will not tell her it was me who took you and you will tell her I found you and helped you heal then I brought you home"

"And what if I don't?" I asked her with a smile on my face.

"Then I will kill you and go to your camp and tell them I found your dead body and get Clarke back that way" she says to me.

I didn't say anything to her and I found a way to get out, there was a knife right next to me and so I took it and cut the rope that was around my hands without Lexa knowing as she was talking to her guards. They leave the room and I knew of a secret door and I take it and make my way to the forest to get the fuck out of here, I ran and I didn't look back.

I ran…I ran for so long and I didn't stop until I got back to the camp.

Clarke's P.O.V

I ended up going to the party to make Jasper happy, it was almost sunrise by the time most of the kids went to bed, there were still some out and talking and drinking. I drank quite a bit but I had sobered up a little bit so I wasn't drunk, just tipsy. I was about to go to bed when one of the guys who was watching the gate said that someone was out there, I opened the gate and I couldn't believe who was standing on the other side of it.

"Bellamy?" I said in disbelief.

"Princess," he said back.

"You're alive" I say to him as I hug him as tight as I can.

"I'm alive, I'm okay" He says and he hugs me as tight as I am hugging him.

"What happened to you?"

"I was taken by Lexa"

"Jasper was right? Oh my god"

"Where is O?" he asked me.

"Asleep, go see her just meet me back in my tent" I tell him.

Bellamy agreed and I went back to my tent to wait for him to come in so we could talk, seeing him stand outside of the gates of camp made my heart stop beating and hugging him made me stop breathing. I need to tell him how I feel about him and tell him how much he means to me because if I don't then I never will and I need to, I love him so much and he needs to know. Meeting Bellamy was one of the best things that has happened to me and yeah I didn't like him at first but I ended up loving him anyway and I wouldn't ask for anything different. He brought light into my life and nothing could take that light away unless they took him away and I am going to kill Lexa for taking my light away. I sat down on my cot and started sketching, I didn't know what I was sketching at first until I realized that it was the beginning of a face…Bellamy's face. Ever since Bellamy went missing I started drawing him all the time and it was because I missed him and loved him so much and that was how I coped with him being gone.

For 6 months he was gone and I thought I would never see him again, I had hoped that I would but part of me honestly thought I was never going to see him again. When I saw him at the gate all that hope I had was turned into love for the man in front of me, he was alive and breathing and he wasn't dead. When I hugged him I had gotten the best feeling in my chest to know it wasn't in my head that Bellamy was alive and breathing and wasn't dead, and I know Octavia will be almost as happy as I am that Bellamy was here and safe and okay after 6 months of him being missing. Drawing was my only escape from feeling the pain and sadness that I felt when Bellamy went missing and I love him but when I was drawing it was like he was here with me as I did. I would draw him every chance I got because I didn't feel the pain of him being gone when I did but as soon as I was done I felt the pain and sadness all over again.

I ended up falling asleep by the time Bellamy had come in my tent and how I knew he came in was I heard him breathing and I felt him come over to the cot and cover me up and kisses the top of my head. I had woken up at this point and he sits down at the end of my cot still thinking I am asleep and he starts talking…

"You have no idea how much I have missed you, yeah I know me of all people missed the sassy princess but I did…a lot. You were the one I was trying to get back to the most and I didn't know if I was going to be able to when I was first taken; but as time went on and they kept me alive I knew it was possible. I know you probably can't hear me which might be a good thing but when I was in that cell I wasn't really worried about O, I was but I wasn't, I was worried about you and I know you can take care of yourself but I was constantly worried about you. Anyway I'll leave you be but when you wake up come get me" he said to me.

So I pretend to talk in my sleep "stay…" I said.

"Princess you awake?" he asked.

I grabbed his hand but I made sure he thinks I am asleep and I think he got what I was trying to tell him and he ended up climbing into my cot right next to me and had wrapped his arms around me. I felt so safe in his arms, I never wanted him to take his arm away and I want to hold me forever, I love him so much and he feels like home. I end up hearing Bellamy start snoring slightly and that made me happy to hear that he is sleeping, I end up falling asleep again not too long after hearing Bellamy.

*Next day*

When I woke up and Bellamy was still asleep with his arm wrapped around me, I felt safe in his arms and I wanted nothing to change. I want him to hold me and never ever let me go, have you ever felt that kind of love for someone? I just layed there watching him sleep still in disbelief that he is home safe and sound in my arms, he was missing for 6 months and now he is home and breathing. Lexa took him and made me and the whole camp think he was dead and for what? To make me suffer then well done because she did and I will kill her for what she has done, not only taking him hurt me but his sister and the kids at camp that looked up to him.

He looks so peaceful when he sleeps and it looks like nothing can hurt him but the awful painful truth is that he was hurt, I don't know what she did to him but what I do know is that whatever she did do she is going to pay for it. I just watch him breathing and hoping that he never stops breathing, seeing him breathing makes me want to stay breathing. He then opens his eyes and locks eyes with me and then he smiles. "How long have you been awake?" he asks.

"Not long, we need to talk" I say to him with a small smile.

"I know we do, I missed you"

"I missed you too, nothing was right without you, most of the time I didn't even know what I was doing…I was numb without you"

"Clarke…"

"Don't, please"

I sit up and turn my back towards him, I don't want him to say anything…I don't want him to say that he cares but he doesn't love me the way I love him and if he did say that then I think it would kill me. "Clarke…look at me" he says but I don't and I look at the floor. "Please look at me" he asked again and I still didn't look at him so he put his hand on my cheek and made me look at him. "What do you mean you felt numb?" he asked me but before I could answer someone outside was screaming.

We ran over to them to see if they were okay and what was going on and of course someone was training and was by mistake shot, they took the girl who was shot to the med bay and I turn to Bellamy "We'll talk later" I tell him as I turn and walk to the med bay.

Bellamy's P.O.V

Just my fucking luck that someone would get hurt when I am trying to talk to Clarke about something important, she was about to answer my question when someone was mistakenly shot. She told me that we would talk later but I didn't want to talk later…I wanted to talk now but I walked away and went to make sure the wall was up to date. As time passed and Clarke was still working on the girl I knew that most likely the girl would not make it and Clarke would be a mess afterwards, I had also had time to catch up with Miller.

An hour goes by and Clarke comes out of the bay crying, she walked right past me out of the gate, of course I ran after her and she stopped running when we got to the waterfall. She sat on a log and cried, then she screamed as loud as she could and I think it made her feel a little better. "Did that make you feel better?" I asked her when she sat back down.

"What are you doing here?" she asks me while trying to hide the fact that she was crying.

"You ran out of camp, I wanted to make sure you were okay" I tell her as I walk over to her.

"I'm fine"

"No you're not, she died didn't she"

"Yeah she did, she was only 16"

"Come here"

I pull her close to me and she wraps her arms around me and she starts crying even more and I let her. I hate to see her so upset but as she cries in my arms I try to memorize the feeling of her in my arms and her letting herself fall apart in my arms. She sits up and looks at me and then she starts smiling and it was the most beautiful thing that I could see. "Thank you for being here" she says.

"Well I wasn't going to let you come out here alone" I tell her as I keep her against my chest.

"We have to get back to camp" she says as she starts to get up but I didn't want to go back yet, I didn't want to let her go and I didn't want to make this moment disappear.

"Wait" I say as I grab her wrist and bring her back down next to me. She looked at me with a question in her eyes like she was asking 'what?'. "We need to talk and I want you to listen to me and what I am saying and when I am done then you can say whatever you want" I say to her, she nods and I place her hands on mine. "When I went missing the only thing that I was thinking of was trying to get back to you, I knew O would be fine and I know you can take care of yourself but I was constantly worried about you. When I escaped and I was running through the woods the only thing that kept me going was getting back to you and then I saw you and I was beyond happy" She is looking at me with tears in her eyes. "Before Lexa took me I was getting up the courage to tell you something and the day I was going to she took me, and what scared me the most was the fact I might've not been able to ever tell you" I say as I look down, our hand were still intertwined.

"Tell me what?" she asks as she puts one hand on my face and makes me look her in the eyes.

"That I am in love with you" I said to her, she looked shocked at first and then her expression softened and a smile appeared on her face. "I love you so much"

"I…I love you too" she says and I couldn't help but smile at her. She then pulls me down to her and our lips connect with fire and compassion. As it gets deeper and hotter the more I wanted more so I knew I had to break the kiss so I did.

"We need to get back to camp so I can show you how much I love you in my tent" I say to her and with that she and I left hand in hand until we got back to the gate and she ran to my tent so I ran after her.

Writer's P.O.V (Smut warning)

Bellamy and Clarke enter his tent and as soon as the flap of the tent is closed their hands are all over each other, his hands move over her waist and hips pulling her closer to him. Her hands were round his neck and when she felt his arms go around right under her ass she jumped up putting her legs around his waist. He carries her over to the makeshift bed and lays her down, he abandons his shirt and then he helps her take hers off along with her bra, he stops for a minute and just looks at Clarke like she is the only thing in the world. "You sure you want this" he asks her. Without answering she pulls him back down on her kissing him with as much force as she could and flips them so that she is on top, she pulls off her pants and then sits on Bellamy's lap again and starts rocking against him. His hands land on her hips as she rocks and then he is pushing his hips up towards her.

As they are grinding on each other small moans and groans fill the tent, Clarke tugs on Bellamy's belt and when she gets it off of him she throws it across the room. Bellamy chuckled and helped her get his pants off, after they were off Bellamy flipped them back over so that he was on top, his kisses started getting sloppy and kind of all over the place. He pauses and looks at her so he can memorize what she looks like when she is under him like that, she looks at him and smiles. He leans down and locks his lips with hers and he goes slow at first then he moves from her lips to her jaw and then her neck and he hits her sweet spot so now he knows where to mark her. He makes his way down her body with sloppy kisses until he hits the edge of her underwear, he slides them down her legs while leaving kisses on her inner thigh making Clarke moan softly. He moves his thumb over her clit a couple times make Clarke gasp from the unexpected touch, Bellamy smirks and then he goes down and starts sucking on her clit. She start to arch her back because of the pleasure she feels throughout her body,

Bellamy places two fingers in her making her gasp and moan, he is sucking and fingering her all in a rhythm making her legs shake, Clarke grabs Bellamy's beautiful curls and tugs as the orgasm comes to the surface. She releases and Bellamy licks it every drop of her juices that she had released, she is breathing heavy but she still wants more of Bellamy. "Tell me what you want" Bellamy tells her, knowing that she wasn't finished with him.

"You…I want you inside me, and not just your fingers" She said to him as she bit her bottom lip. Bellamy knew what he had to do so he takes off his underwear and lines himself up with her entrance and when he enters her she gasps because she didn't realize how big he was until he was inside her. But she wasn't complaining. He starts at a slow rhythm making Clarke arch her back and he knows she wants him to go faster but he is waiting for her to beg him to move faster. "Bellamy…please" she says.

"Tell me what you want, '' he says to her as he keeps his rhythm.

"Faster please" and with that he speeds up making Clarke go crazy. One thing Bellamy did expect that she would do was flip them so that she was riding him but he wasn't complaining. She rides him until she and him both come to their peak, "cum inside me, it's okay" she says to him as she holds him close. So with her words he does and then she lays down next to him and then he pulls her to him.

Clarke's P.O.V

As the room now smells of sex I am now laying in Bellamy's arms as happy as I could be, he is all I have ever dreamed of and more. "You know when you went missing I tried everything I could to find you" I say to him.

"I know you did, and I'm sorry you had to feel all of that" he says as he holds me as close as he could to his body.

"Did she ever tell you why…why she took you from me?"

"When her guards took me to her I had said 'kidnapping me and holding me in a cell for 6 months to make the people I love think I'm dead and for what?' and she said and I quote 'so I can bring you back alive and she will take me back' and I knew she was talking about you"

"She took you so she could try and get me back?"

"So I had told her 'so this is about Clarke' and she said 'of course it's about Clarke and when I take you back you will not tell them I took you and you will tell them that I found you and helped heal you' and so I asked 'what if I don't' and she said she would kill me then come here tell you guys that she found my dead body and get you back that way" Bellamy explains to me.

"I'm gonna kill her" I say to him.

"No no no Clarke"

"She took you and said she would kill you if you didn't do what she said Bellamy, I can't just let that go"

"I'm not saying you have to but if you kill her then you will start a war that we will not win"

"Then what do you want me to do?"

"Be here with me, stay here with me, and if she tries to come back and kill me then we'll go to war" he says. He wipes away the tears that escaped my eyes and tries to pull me closer to him as much as he possibly could.

"I love you Bellamy"

"I love you too"