Not to be Jaded

The land was fresh from last night's storm and Charlotte was far down the river washing off. The boys were goofing off somewhere much further away, she made sure of that. The day was long and the work was hard. The sun had set early and the stars lit up the water. It was unusually calm and the lack of wind brought complete ease in the stillness and quietude. The navy sky set the land to rest as she let herself fall through the surface and sink into the replenishing stream. Jaspers Panther guarded her on the shore, waiting patiently for her as he licked his fur that was nearly missed in the night. She ended up just moving her hands through the water, back and forth as she created a new world around her through her enveloping thoughts. She relived memories of the father that haunted her. Her character was a miracle considering his crimes against her. Regardless of her wisdom, she let him follow her around. He had left a toxin in her subconscious. She grabbed her towel in a haze and snuck back into the cave, running to a stop when she immediately noticed the new change in the room. A handmade changing screen had been built and set up around her bed that had been moved to the right of the fire. Now she would be warmest and have the most privacy. Her heart brimmed with thankfulness and she was eager to utilize her gift. She draped her towel over it and smiled ear to ear at all the little flaws in it's creation. They had really taken their time to build it for her. She knew Schwoz must've spilled the beans and she was glad for it.

The surge of inspiration sent her running for material. She would do her best to make an a amazing dinner, something different and creative. The boys didn't know it but she'd been saving a bag of rice, and wow did they need something new. Panther slept sweetly by the fire and she cooked peacefully to the sound of his purr. She adorned the table with wild flowers and filled the cave with smells that drew them in from outside.

"What did we do to deserve this?" asked Jasper practically drooling. She shrugged and said it was the least she could do for them after the thoughtfulness they'd displayed.

"Well since we're all here.." began Ray as he sat down his fork. This brought their attention quickly with his expression suggesting news of consequential nature.

"I'm going on Schwoz's raft tomorrow."

His tone told them the decision was not to be argued, not to say they wouldn't try though.

"But we barely survived the wreck, how much luckier can we get?"

Charlotte's words made his head hang as if he'd known and dreaded this very response. Her feelings were no different than Jasper and Henry's.

"Yea, Schwoz said it wouldn't hold anyways, just like the balloon. Can't we just send a message?" added Jasper.

"Yea, it's too risky and we need all hands to make this system work, the system we just mastered might I add." expressed Henry. Ray let them voice their every thought before responding carefully.

"I have to try right? It's my responsibility to get you kids back to your families. I'll get all the wood from the ship tomorrow, you guys can help me dive for it."

Charlotte's heart was screaming, pounding out of her chest and she searched for reason. Honesty was extremely precious to her and she knew how useless it was to lie. It was never a clever option. She had acquired such trustworthiness that a simple lie could destroy her work in seconds. But for whatever reason she found herself desperately grasping at words to convince him to stay.

"You can't, it already fell apart and floated away."

The deceit fell too easily off her lips.

"What?" he said baffled, shaking his head.

"I saw it when I was in the water earlier." she responded. Henry was in the water earlier himself. He looked at her with angst in his slightly widened eyes. His shoulders sagged in shock and loss for words. He saw the regretful sorrow in her eyes and realized what she was giving up. She was sacrificing a treasured piece of herself and the loss was evident on her face.

"Excuse me." he said almost unnoticed as he slipped out the door. Ray took everything she said without a shred of doubt, and so the matter was dropped. After eating, everyone but Charlotte and Henry went to bed. She wrapped a shall around her shoulders, pulling it tight and sneaking out the door. She found Henry just as he was falling to the sand in exhaustion.

"What in the world?" she exclaimed rhetorically.

"Henry, what are you doing?" she said to the boy drenched from head to toe and out of breath.

"I wanted to make your lie true. I know how much it means to you so.." he trailed off. His arms rested over his knees as his hands hung lazily and he shook the droplets out of his hair. She stood still as she pondered the ethics of it all. She stopped herself from wrestling with it any further and focused on him instead. She ran her fingers through his hair making him look up at her with big, adoring eyes. Her look told him that she didn't know how she could ever come to deserve him and his told her that she needn't wonder. They kissed a kiss that was far above any mortal thing of the world. It carried them beyond the breadths of happiness and sealed their love as eternal.

The next morning, Charlotte sat at the foot of the fireplace. Her knees were cooled by the stone and her hands tinkered with kindling as last night's ash sparkled in the ray of white sun. She held off for a moment as she played with the light on her fingers. She stood with her eyes tight with slumber still left to be taken as she swatted off the dust from her legs. She turned to check on the boys when she noticed Jaspers bed was empty. She bent down to Ray, Henry, and Schwoz with distress in her grip on the covers that she shook.

"Hey guys, wake up." she said with a voice she tried not to make sound too urgent but they recognized the worry in anyway.

"What? What is it, are you ok?" said Ray with his eyes still closed. Henry cleared his throat like a garbage disposal and sat up to find her face as he rubbed his own.

"Jasper never came home last night." she said now letting her concern be known.

"Ok, ok Char don't worry, we'll take care of it." comforted Henry as he blindly patted her arm. Suddenly they heard excruciating screams coming from a quarter mile away. They all ran for the door and sprinted toward the voice. Growls and painful roars followed his deep outcries. The steep dune they scaled resisted them, but they climbed despite the constant falls and slips. Ray lead the way and abruptly halted them at the top as he threw his arms out to his sides. They followed his shock that focused on the unlikely view. Just as their eyes met Jasper, a thick and bloodied knife fell from his hand. His red fist was fiercely clamped until he dropped the blade, then his body changed from anger into nothing. He suffered a claw mark on his face that left a horrifying gash from his left temple to the right of his chin and down his jaw. It left the assumption that his beloved pet had turned on him. But as the winds shifted the sand, another animal was revealed where he'd withdrawn his knife. Panther laid still, another 50 feet away. Jasper stumbled back in terror of what he'd done as he regained his breath and studied the blood on his hands. They watched as he remembered his place and ran to the other downed beast.

He knelt down and examined the wounds beneath the black fur. He stopped as they all held their breath in fear when he felt none. Both creatures had died a needless death and he had every part in it. He let himself hit the ground in defeat. Charlotte moved passed Rays arm, making Jasper aware of their presence as she inched closer. He turned around with silent tears pouring from his bloodshot eyes. She outstretched her arms as an invitation that he took no hesitation in receiving. He wrapped his arms around her waist and she held his head to her as he wept. After a while he turned to face what he would have to accept. He wiped his face and placed both arms beneath the animal, forcing himself to lift it. He stood shakily with rough grunts of struggle.

They stood back as he made his path back over the dune and down to the water. The sun hid almost completely behind clouds now as rain began to ensue. They waited as he went back for the second larger beast. Soon, they were all standing cluelessly in the rain as Jasper buried both innocent creatures. He couldn't hate it for it's carnivorous nature. It was victim to the same world that made everyone do wicked things to survive. Not a good excuse for people, but the creature knew no better. It was all a dark blur of greyish blue as the rain swallowed up the land. At the last toss of sand he lowered to his knees respectfully and closed his eyes as he leaned his head against the shovel. The torrent of water struck his body by the gallon, though it was warm and somehow comforting. He had seen more than his share of death in life and was sick of the coping mechanisms, recovery and condolences. He'd wished it was healthy to numb himself because he was better at that. He never spoke of it again but the event had a small but toxic efficacy within his core. Why did reality have to exercise it's power on him so often, it was so ruthless and he couldn't help but feel targeted. He knew it was immature to think that way and would not lament over it any longer. The change that came from that was what made him into a man. His wisdom was not without occasional goofiness because that was who he was. But he would leave behind the qualities that made him question his worth and purpose.

Charlotte had to drag him back and could not convince him to eat as he turned over in his bed and tried to sleep.

"Should we make him talk?" Ray asked the others one day. They paused as Henry shook his head and they looked to Charlotte.

"Fools rush in where angels fear to tread."

The quotes she once provided in fun had somehow turned to words of caution and wisdom for the heeding. Not that they didn't appreciate them just as much.

Over mere weeks his beard thickened and his hair grew darker and longer. The blackish scruff was cut clean along his sharp jaw while his scar remained prominent across his face. They worked on escape theories and ways to get off the planet, but it was clear that life had been abruptly wiped out. They hoped whatever it was would not strike again as they settled into their life.