Flaming Art
Friends. That's what we are. It's working for now. My x-rated dreams are easing the temptation. Still not allowed in the church though. Just as well. I'd probably be struck by lightening the moment I step foot in there anyway.
I guess it's a little more than just friends. We have date nights which we don't call date nights. Still not having sex but we go out to dinner and the movies. Godmother invited him to one of her art exhibits. Luckily he had other plans. Unfortunately I did not.
The taxi to what will no doubt be an event filled with bad taste; I ponder what I want for my future. I have my café but I feel like something is missing. I doubt it's a child because that would give me something in common with Godmother. The only thing worse would be having something in common with Martin.
Walking in the door I see the first of many vulgar pieces masquerading as art. Most could take an eye out if you're not careful. Others made you reach for your sunglasses. And there in the centre declaring at the top of her voice what had inspired each piece was the artist herself.
"Well fancy seeing you here." Of course Martin would be here. "Trying to ensure that you're in the will?" He certainly isn't.
"No, I just couldn't find something else to do at short notice. Why are you here? Clare is still in Finland and is happy with her new husband." Just what I need. Two enemies in one small space.
"Your Stepmother invited me." Of course she did. That's a big fat lie. He's still hoping that Clare will take him back despite being divorced and remarried.
"Watch out for the one with things sticking out of it." As I walk away I hear Martin ask. "Which one?" Precisely.
I have managed to get avoiding Godmother but being sighted by her so she knows I attended down to an art. Pardon the pun. There's actually a piece that has multiple tongues sticking out it. That's going to give me nightmares especially when I see someone standing way too close to it.
Another ten minutes and I'm out of here. If I want any chance of sleeping tonight I need to watch a romantic comedy or read a good book. The more I walk around the space, the more disturbing the art gets.
"I don't think anything is going to attack you." Hot priest is here. "Although I'm not brave enough to stand next to the one with all the tongues."
"Didn't you have somewhere else to be tonight?" Why would he voluntarily turn up to this thing? I mean I understand Martin being here. After all, he has no friends and no life.
"Yes but it finished early. I came to see if you wanted to catch a movie." Hot Priest to the rescue. Great timing too.
"Anything but a horror movie. I've seen enough nightmare inducing things have tonight." If we're lucky we can avoid Godmother and Martin.
"There must be at least one piece of art that isn't x-rated or horrifying." Doubtful but it's not stopping him from looking for it.
The only thing that isn't hideous is the collection of candles surrounding a piece which looks as though someone fired a paintball gun at a canvas. Not exactly what I would call art but definitely catches the eye in a non-aggressive way. I wonder what it's called but Martin is lurking near it so I'll just look it up on my phone.
"Interesting." Hot Priest has a program. Maybe he can find out what it's called. "The rainbow coloured painting is entitled 'Orgasm'. So that's what one looks like."
When the screaming starts I think it's someone trying to add audio to the visual, but it turns out that Martin knocked a candle into the painting and set it on fire. Time to leave. Hot Priest is right behind me as I dash for the door.
"Well your family certainly isn't dull." Has he met my father? And technically Martin's no longer family. Godmother I refuse to acknowledge as family.
"Personally I could do with less excitement of that kind." Or just less contact with people related to my family in any form.
"Let's see if we can make an eight o'clock session at the movies." He's holding my hand. This feels like an actual date. Must remember we're just friends.
"There's a new Marvel movie out. Why don't we see that or have you seen that already?" I've just realised that he might have seen it already. I have no idea what he does between church and not date nights.
"No. I haven't seen it yet. Some of my younger parishioners talked about it." How much younger?
Well this evening finished better than it started. I would have enjoyed the art exhibit more if I had known it was going to go up in flames. At least one piece. Unfortunately it was the only decent piece of art there. For all we know it may have all caught fire after we left. Guess I will find out at Sunday lunch.