Title: The Facts of Life
Rating: T (mentions sex and human biology)
Summary: Kurt's curiosity about the female body results in a realization for the Captain he didn't see coming.
She was pretty. The only good thing eleven-year-old Kurt von Trapp could say about Baroness Schrader was she was pretty. Fortunately for him, that was all he was thinking about lately, whether a woman was pretty. Sometimes when his father was busy, he would sneak down the back stairwell and slip into his father's study. There were so many books in there, some of them had pictures of women, some in pretty dresses, some in their underwear, some in a lot less.
Kurt was old enough to know there was a difference between boys and girls. He had five sisters, that was no secret, it was what that difference was that piqued his curiosity. He had asked Friedrich about it, but his older brother teased him and told him that he was too young to know anything about girls. Kurt didn't think he was too young, he was interested in girls already, especially older ones that had all the differences readily apparent for him to observe.
Kurt was careless one evening with his hidden treasure. Father and Uncle Max were having cigars and the Baroness was listening to the wireless in the drawing room. Kurt didn't hear Maria call for him until it was too late. They were supposed to rehearse for another puppet show, but he would rather have kept reading and looking at those intriguing pictures. "Kurt von Trapp!" Maria gasped when she saw the book he was thumbing through. "Does your Father know you have that book? That's not a book for a young man to be looking at. Give that to me please."
Kurt felt his stomach drop, Maria was almost never cross with them, but the one time she got angry with Louisa she told the Captain and Louisa got punished. "Give that to me please," Maria repeated in a lower, firmer tone.
"I was just looking," Kurt defended as he obeyed his governess. "I wasn't hurting anything."
"Kurt, you are too young to be thinking about girls or women or anything of the sort, and books like this one, they aren't a proper picture of anything," Maria replied. "Run along now and do not let me see you with this book or any like it again."
Kurt hurried off to join his siblings hoping that Maria would forget about this and not mention it to his father. She had turned bright red when she saw what he had chosen to look through though, even redder than she had looked when Father was singing to them and kept staring at her in her blue chiffon dress.
Maria tucked the contraband book away for safe keeping. Kurt had been caught twice trying to spy on girls when they were in town at the shops and now this. He was only 11, but on the other hand, he was 11...curiosity was natural for a boy his age. Still, if he had questions that he needed answers to he shouldn't be finding them in the Captain's reference books, he should learn about them in a proper, dignified way. As soon as the children were asleep, she would speak to the Captain about this. He needed to know about Kurt's exploration of the opposite sex before it went too far.
Gretl didn't want to go down that night. She kept asking for glasses of water, to use the bathroom, for Maria to check for monsters in the closet. It was nights like this that the Captain's bedtime rules looked like a smart thing to do. Finally, Maria ended up lying down with Gretl and singing to her until she fell asleep. She was exhausted by the time she made her way downstairs.
The door to the study was partially ajar, the Captain was still awake. It was quiet, Maria assumed Max and the Baroness had retired for the night. The Captain seemed to require very little sleep.
Maria approached the doorway, with the confiscated book, and tapped lightly. She and the Captain would sit and talk about the children and their studies late into the night sometimes. Other times, their talks would turn to other things like the current political climate, the Captain's love of the sea verses her own of the mountains, they had become friends when no one was looking.
The Captain smiled when he saw Maria at the door. "Fraulein, come in please. Is everything all right? It's quite late for you to have come." He rose and moved from behind his desk. Maria wasn't sure exactly what it was the Captain did, he seemed to always be studying maps and diagrams but she didn't know what they were for. That was one thing she didn't intend to ask him about, she somehow felt it was better that she didn't know.
"I'm sorry, is it too late? We can discuss this tomorrow," she offered but the Captain shook his head.
"No, no please." He moved his hand slightly toward the small sofa. "Sit down. Would you like some refreshment? I was about to have a night cap."
"No, thank you, Captain," Maria replied. "Gretl had a hard time falling asleep this evening, it required more time than usual. It's been a bit rainy though and the children have been stuck inside, she probably has so much unspent energy."
The Captain chuckled, "I don't see how anyone can have unspent energy around you, Fraulein."
The Captain sat on the other end of the sofa and studied Maria's face. She had a beautiful innocence about her, nothing like the more worldly women he had known in his time. She was young, nearly 20 years his junior, and as best he could tell did not have much experience with life. Still, she had a the warmest heart he knew and a way with his children that he envied.
Usually, during their evening talks, Maria was laid back and easy going. She would smile and laugh, sit back on the seat, but tonight she was serious and nearly rigid. "What's the matter, Fraulein?"
"What makes you think something is the matter, Captain?" Maria asked defensively. It unnerved her when the Captain seemed to be able to read her thoughts.
"You're tense," he countered. "Your shoulders are locked with more military bearing than a sailor at attention. Are you all right?"
Maria took a deep breath, "I'm fine, but there seems to be a problem brewing with Kurt." She reached for the book she'd laid on the side of the sofa. "I found him looking through this earlier this evening."
The Captain took the volume from Maria's outstretched hand. It was a fictional work with illustrations of men and women in various states of undress and sexual activity. He'd acquired it in France during a shore leave while he was in the Great War. "Ah," the Captain smiled wryly. "Kurt's getting a bit curious. Well, he's 11, almost 12. That's when I started to get interested in girls. What did you say to him?"
"I told him, of course, that he was too young to be looking at such a text and I did not want to see him with anything like it again," Maria replied. "Captain, Kurt is so young. He can't begin to understand anything about what exists between a man and a woman, and especially not from a book like that!"
"Where else would he have been able to learn it?" the Captain asked reasonably. "His teacher is a postulant and until recently, I have been an absentee parent. He's used to figuring things out on his own. I'm surprised he didn't go for the travel magazines, the ones from America, now those…" The Captain raised an eyebrow.
"You aren't the least bit upset about this, are you, Captain?" Maria asked him.
"I'll admit that I'm not happy," the Captain replied. "But Kurt is a boy, this is common for boys. Friedrich did the same thing, I did it, I'm pretty sure Max still does. It's all perfectly natural for boys to be curious."
Maria blushed. The very idea of the Captain looking at pictures of women in their undergarments made her turn nearly purple. "You have never been curious about men, Fraulein?"
Maria swallowed and tried to sink into the material of the couch. "I was raised on a farm, Captain. I was born knowing about how things go between male and female…That has nothing to do with this. Someone has to talk to Kurt before he tries to satisfy his curiosity and…"
"I do that and I'll mortify him," the Captain replied. "The fact you told me is going to embarrass him. If I scold him for this, he's still going to have the questions. No, I think we let it be. You can let him know that if he does have anything he would like to ask me about the fairer sex that he can ask. That is if he's foolish enough to get caught again."
"I'm certain he won't Captain. I told him he best not do this again."
"Oh, he'll do it again," the Captain laughed. "I'm sure my library isn't the only place he's been looking."
"No, he's been watching young ladies on our trips into town, I've noticed," Maria sighed. "Of course, I'll defer to you Captain and direct Kurt here if he has any more…thoughts about this."
Maria rose, she didn't feel like talking more tonight. The entire time she had been uncomfortable and acutely self-aware, especially of what she didn't know about the facts of life. How could she expect to explain it to Kurt when she didn't understand it herself. What was this warmth she felt whenever she was near the Captain. She'd never felt it before, how could she ever explain something she didn't understand?
"Fraulein," the Captain's voice stopped her as she started for the door. "It's perfectly natural to be curious. Grown men even will wonder, we've just learned how to hide it better."
With that the Captain finished his drink and moved toward the study door. "An escort to your room, Fraulein?" he asked, offering her his arm.
Maria smiled and slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow. They ascended the stairs together, then parted ways. "Sleep well, Fraulein. Try not to worry about this too much."
Before Maria could answer, he was gone leaving her own mind and body spinning with curiosity about what it might be like…She scolded herself for the thought and went to her room
When the next two days came and gone with no mention of the book or being discovered, Kurt felt as if he were in the clear. Maria forbidding his explorations only seemed to have fueled his fire. He thought about girls and women all the time, and pictures weren't enough. It was like now he had seen the drawings and couple of naughty photographs, he had to see the real thing, up close and personal.
He didn't see Maria or his sisters as women, so to look at them or study them never crossed his mind, they were his family, that was different. That left the Baroness. She was like all of those glamours ladies he gawked at, and he didn't particularly like her, so to just take a peek wouldn't be that big of a thing. It would after all, just be looking. He heard his father and Max joke all the time about keeping their hands to themselves when they told stories about their youth when they didn't think the children were listening. Well, that's what he would do, he'd keep his hands to himself.
After dinner seemed as good a time as any. The Baroness often chose to shed her formal attire for a more casual fare to sit and enjoy tea and strudel with the Captain and Max. Kurt inhaled his supper that night, eating even faster than usual. The Captain noticed but didn't say anything. He raised an eyebrow at Maria in question, she replied with her eyes only, she had no idea why Kurt was absorbing his food at such a rate.
While Frau Schmidt was clearing the table, and Maria was trying to talk the Captain into playing the guitar for them that night, Kurt snuck off upstairs. He usually didn't go into that part of the house. It held the guest rooms and guests of the villa were rarely there to visit the children. Max was the only one of the Captain's friends that had any relationship at all with the children. He peered through the keyholes to see which room looked like it belonged to the Baroness. She would be up to change her dress for the third or fourth time that day in a little while. Then he could finally see up close and personal what all the fuss was about.
The Baroness never expected that Kurt or anyone would be inside the large closet that she utilized while at the villa. She carefully stepped out of the tight-fitting, low-cut dinner gown she'd worn especially for Georg, he seemed to be drawn to the color blue. Blue eyes, blue dresses…though it didn't seem to work, he was too focuses on a story Brigitta was telling him to pay attention to her. Maria had laughed along with Georg at the story, though the young governess seemed to be troubled by something. She was watching the younger of the two boys, what was his name…she couldn't keep track…like a hawk.
Kurt was on edge. She was just about to turn around in those thin underclothes, then he could finally have his questions answered. As he waited though, the dust that had collected inside the slats of the closet door teased his nose. Kurt had always been sensitive to dust.
Kurt bit the inside of his cheek trying to stop the massive sneeze, he knew if he sneezed, he would be found out.
As the Baroness was about to reach for the door knob and select her attire she heard it, "AACHOOO!" She looked around the room for a second, clarifying she was alone before yanking open the door to reveal Kurt standing inside her closet with a sheepish grin on his face.
When the Baroness started yelling, Max was the first one to make it up the staircase, with Georg and Maria hot on his heels. He opened the bedroom door to reveal Elsa with her robe covering her front and Kurt wiping his runny nose staring at her in the middle of the room.
"What's happened?" the Captain asked when he stepped into the room.
"He was hiding in the closet watching me change," the Baroness replied. "The little peeping Tom was spying on me, Georg."
Max and Elsa waited for the Captain to explode in fury, but it was Maria that lost her temper this time around. "Kurt von Trapp!" she said in a low toned, firm voice. "You make your apologies and excuses this minute or trust me, Kurt, you will not be happy with the consequences."
The young boy was as embarrassed as the object of his curiosity. He never expected to be caught, he only wanted to see why men were so turned on by women. He couldn't even figure out for himself why women were turned on by men. He didn't even know for sure what turned on was but looking through the forbidden books earlier gave him some idea of what that meant. He couldn't speak, he just stood frozen, completely terrified.
"Elsa," the Captain sighed. "Max, Fraulein let us excuse ourselves so that Elsa may get dressed. Kurt…"
The Captain had been 11, so had Max. Max stepped a little further into the room and took Kurt by the sleeve. "Come on, step out." Both men knew the poor kid was frozen solid.
When the foursome was outside the bedroom Maria looked at Kurt, the anger on her face was something the Captain had only seen directed at him. He wasn't sure he wanted his son on the other side of Maria's wrath. "What did I tell you about looking at women or pictures or…" she began. "What do I have to say to make you understand that these types of desires are wrong! They are sinful!"
The Captain looked at Maria, his face registering three-parts shock and much to his chagrin, one part humor. Maria quickly let her temper loose on him for that. "I'm humorous, Captain! I warned you about this!"
"Fraulein," the Captain interjected. "Perhaps, you are not the proper person to handle this situation. It might be a bit out of your league."
Maria fixed her hands on her hips, "And who pray tell is going to handle it then, you certainly haven't to date. Now look what's happened? The Baroness is embarrassed and appalled, I'm sure."
"Perhaps," the Captain replied. "A situation I will momentarily rectify, in the meantime though, Kurt, please wait for me downstairs in the study. Go right now, please."
Kurt felt sick. The study…they were rarely called to the study alone and when they were it ended with a slamming door, some type of yelling, or once in Louisa's case, the inability to sit for almost a week. What would he be getting for this? He wanted to throw up.
By the time he got downstairs, the other children were curious about what had made all the adults in the house rush upstairs. "Did you hide a mouse in her bed?" Louisa asked. "Did you put a snake in her vanity?" Friedrich wanted to know.
Kurt didn't answer, he was ashamed of what he did and more so that he'd gotten caught doing it. He went to the study and waited…he knew the waiting was his father's fondest form of punishment.
"Fraulein, go see to the other children, assure them everything is all right, then please take a walk and cool down," the Captain advised. "I understand you have told me that Kurt has been curious, but it's hardly sinful for a young man to question things. It's healthy and natural that he has questions. He's just having them a little younger than I suspected."
"Captain, I don't understand how you aren't angry," Maria sighed. "He invaded Baroness Shrader's privacy, her space was violated, her sense of security in this house…"
"Maria, he's an 11-year-old boy that meant no harm." The Captain dropped the Fraulein as their conversation got more intense. "Take a deep breath, go for a walk, you and I will speak later in the study as well."
Maria turned and went downstairs. The Captain didn't even seem to care what had just happened with his own almost fiancée, and Max appeared to be laughing at either the Baroness or herself or both. She put off the children's questions and did as the Captain asked, though a walk around the villa was not what she needed, she needed her mountain. She started out for that sacred spot even as darkness loomed on the horizon. She had to clear her head. She'd behaved as if she were angry at Kurt, and it's true she was disappointed, but she was actually angry at herself for her own sinful curiosities of late. A walk in the mountain air was just what she needed.
Max went to entertain the children while the Captain first mollified the Baroness, then went to see Kurt. The boy was sitting on the settee, his knees pulled up to his chest. He had no color in his face whatsoever. The Captain felt sorry for him, he'd been there too, and he prayed he would handle this a lot better than his father and the headmaster at school did.
The Captain sat down on the settee without saying anything to Kurt then simply instructed, "Breathe."
Kurt let out the breath he was holding and took a deep one though his chest felt so constricted by anxiety it was hard for him. "Are you going to punish me?" he finally asked. He needed to know and get it over with.
"I'm not sure," the Captain said honestly. "But I am going to talk to you. What's going on Kurt? Fraulein Maria told me you have been looking at some of my books that she feels are beyond your years, the girls' magazines have gone missing and on inspection just now I found them and some other photographs, I believe belong to Max, under your bed."
"I just don't understand, Father," Kurt said after another big breath. "I don't understand why a man thinks a woman is pretty or why I think a woman is pretty or why a woman says a man is handsome. I don't understand why men and women are different and I don't understand why I enjoy seeing how."
The Captain nodded, "And you didn't feel you could talk with me about that, did you? What did you think would happen if you came to me and said, "Father, I don't understand the relationships between men and women, please explain it to me."?"
Kurt looked down, "Kind of can't ask you when you aren't here," he murmured. "I started thinking about it all the time with Fraulein Justyna was here. I kept saying in my head, she's pretty, but I don't understand what made me think that. I asked Friedrich once and he told me I was too young and to let it alone."
"I'm here now, Kurt," the Captain replied as his throat constricted with emotion. "I know I hurt you and your brother and sisters by being gone so often and by shutting you all outside of my life when I was at home. I know you only teased the governesses for my attention, so I would have to come home and I won't ever stop feeling sorry for that. Do you understand?"
Kurt nodded so the Captain continued. "But all of that is passed. I'm home now and in a few months, I hope that I won't have to travel much except for a few business engagements here and there. Then it won't be for more than a few days. I promise to phone every day when I do have to go.'
"You won't be visiting Baroness Schrader anymore?" Kurt asked.
The Captain chuckled, "That remains to be seen in a few ways, Kurt. Right now, the Baroness is cross with me for not getting as upset with you as she feels I should have but if all goes well, I'm hoping she will be making a residence here, in our home, with me and you children, as your new mother."
Kurt's eyes got wider. He had just spied on the half-naked body of the woman his father selected to be their MOTHER! It didn't get worse than that! Add to it the fact that none of the children liked her or wanted her around their father. They were only accepting of her because she brought their Father back home. If she hadn't agreed to visit, then the Captain would still be in Vienna.
"I'm sure she will accept an apology," the Captain replied taking Kurt's face as fear of the Baroness feelings towards him going forward. "And you will have to apologize as Fraulein Maria instructed. Why didn't you obey her immediately? You always do."
"I couldn't," Kurt replied. "I tried to talk but my mouth got all dry and nothing would come out. I'm sorry, Father. I'm sorry that I spied, I'm sorry I snuck off, I am sorry, but I'm still confused about all of it."
"I'm going to unconfuse you," the Captain assured him. "Do you know how a woman gets pregnant?" he asked bluntly. "The mechanics of it all?"
"Mother told me once that when a man and a woman love each other very much, the love expands and makes a baby," Kurt replied. "I think she was going to have Grretl when she said that."
"Well, in a perfect world, that's correct" the Captain replied. "But the truth is Kurt that a man can make a woman pregnant even when it has nothing to do with love. You have a penis and from the photographs you have been studying and the fact you have sisters, you know girls don't. It's like a lock and a key. The girl is shaped almost like a keyhole and the male like the key. The key can enter the keyhole, so the two fit together. It's that physical connection that has the potential to make a baby."
"So, any man and any woman can make a baby, just anyone?" Kurt asked.
"If it is the right time for the women, yes," the Captain replied. "Love has little to do with reproduction, Kurt. Animals do it all the time, birds do it, bees do it, no love involved there. Humans can either have sex or they can make love, one is purely biological, and the other…well that is magic and unfortunately, you will never understand that until you are older and feel it yourself."
"I think I'm even more confused now than I was before," Kurt said out loud though he thought he spoke only to himself.
"Let's see if I can make it easier," the Captain replied. "Biology makes children. If a woman is fertile and that happens about once a month, and she has sex with a man, she can get pregnant whether she loves him, likes him, or anything else. A woman can get pregnant the first time a couple has sex, at least five to six days a month, standing up, sitting down, lying down…so unless you are prepared to deal with the consequences, we do not have plain sex, do you understand that?"
Kurt nodded so the Captain went on. "Emotion makes a family. That's the difference between having sex and making love. Love making is all about emotion, it's about connecting to another person in a very private way, biologically the two are the same, but emotionally they are different. It's the love making part you want to do, you want to wait for that emotion to come to you, Kurt. It's one thing to satisfy a curiosity, it's another entirely to simply biologically connect with random or multiple women. That is something I never want to hear about you doing, if I'm going to be a grandpa it's going to be when you are in love, married, and 30. You read me?"
Kurt contemplated this, his father was being open and kind with him. He got brave and asked, "Why do women grow breasts and men don't?"
"Ah, very good question," the Captain replied. "The woman is responsible for feeding a baby from the bosom. Remember when Mother had Marta and Gretl and she would drape the blanket across her chest, she was feeding them from her breast. That area is very sensitive, and it has other uses but the main reason that happens is so there is a way for the woman to give milk to her baby. You see a cow's udder? That's the same idea only far more attractive on humans. The man is built firmer, he must be able to carry more weight. It goes back to when nearly all men had physical jobs, our bodies are made to help us survive and yes to help us reproduce."
Then Kurt really got brave, "Do you have sex, Father?"
The Captain did a double take, "Yes, Kurt. I have had sex, when I was in the Navy, I did a lot of things after too much whiskey that I am not proud of and never want to hear of you or your brother doing. And I have made love, to your mother. When I was married to her and ready to have children, ready to make a family. Family very much comes from love, Kurt."
"I miss Mother a lot sometimes," the boy confessed hoping that wouldn't make his father clam up on him again.
The Captain surprised his son. He moved and pulled Kurt into a hug. "I do too," he confessed. "I miss her every day and I thought that if I just removed everything in my life that reminded me of her, I would feel better, but I didn't. It only made things worse."
"If Baroness Schrader becomes our new mother, will you make love with her?" Kurt asked as the embrace ended.
That was one question the Captain didn't have answer for. He didn't see Elsa in his mind's eye when Kurt said "make love." He saw another face entirely, one that he had seen too often in his own curious dreams recently.
Father and son talked a bit more about the birds and bees, "Now, Kurt. I want you to go to Baroness Schrader and Fraulein Maria and apologize. What you did was wrong. It invaded the Baroness' privacy and diminished her ability to feel secure in this house. She is entitled to that as our guest. Please, do not mention to anyone what I told you about the Baroness and me. Things are not settled yet, and I don't want any of you children talking about it. Is that clear?"
"Yes, Father," Kurt replied. "I am sorry, Father. I can't excuse what I did. I knew I had to find out what the fuss was all about and, I guess the Baroness was the only person in the house I felt…that I don't feel close to."
"Next time you have any questions Kurt, about anything, come and talk to me," the Captain instructed. "I promise to listen and hear you out. This was a mistake. When I was a young man your grandmother, my mother, told me, "Georg, everyone is entitled to one major mistake in life, this was yours…" You see, I'd gotten into a fight in the hallway at school and broken a statute of the Blessed Virgin. I was sure my parents were going to ship me off to boarding school or worse, but instead that's what she said…go with that lesson."
Kurt nodded, knowing he best not disappoint the Captain anymore. He went first to find the Baroness and make his apologies. She was less than gracious about it, scolding him and calling him a "peeper". He was almost glad she wasn't more accepting of his mistake, then he might have to like her. That might ruin his entire day.
When Kurt went to find Maria, she was not in her room, nor was she with the other children in the nursery. "Where is Fraulein Maria?" he asked Liesl.
"I thought she was with you and Father," Liesl replied. She wasn't going to question Kurt; she had an idea what happened, and it was embarrassing to even think about. She told the other kids to keep quiet, they wouldn't like it if they made a mistake and Kurt teased them.
"No, it was just Father and me," Kurt replied. "She must still be outside."
Kurt went to look outside but the Captain stopped him. "Where are you going so late?"
"To look for Fraulein Maria," Kurt replied. "I went to apologize like you said but I can't find her."
"It's too late for you to be going outside," the Captain replied. "I'll go look for Fraulein Maria, you go up to bed, brush your teeth and get down on your knees to ask forgiveness. You can apologize to Maria in the morning."
The Captain searched the entire property for Maria to no avail. She wasn't at the lake or in the barn with the horses. She had been so upset she might have gone to church to pray or strolled off the grounds and lost her way. He spoke quickly with Max, leaving him in charge of an orderly bedtime, then got into the car to search for Maria.
It was pitch black outside. Anything could have happened to her, anything at all. He felt sick to his stomach as each of the roads turned up empty. If he didn't find her in the next ten minutes he didn't care if he woke every nun at Nonberg Abbey, he would be ringing their bell.
"Where could she be?" he asked the wind that was kicking up, signaling a summer storm. "Come on, Maria. Where did you go?"
It came to him like a whisper. Of course! She had been angry, hurt, maybe even as confused as he was about some of the emotions from that night. He turned the car towards the hills, she went to the hills when her heart was lonely and afraid. That's why she spent so much time there. That was where she'd gone.
Halfway up the road alongside the Untesberg, the Captain spotted her. She had her shawl firmly wrapped around her shoulders, but she was walking with great confidence. She knew exactly how to get home. Still, it was cold and about to rain. He pulled the car over and stepped out calling so he didn't startle her, "Fraulein! Fraulein Maria!"
She could barely hear him over the increasing wind. "Captain?"
He stepped into the meager light provided by the car. "Yes, come and get in the car. There's a storm kicking up."
She nodded and obeyed him, but she didn't understand why he'd driven all this way. "I'm sorry, Captain," she murmured as she got into the vehicle. The Captain took off his jacket and laid it across her lap like a blanket. "You'll be warm in a minute," he replied not acknowledging her apology.
"I shouldn't have gone all this way when I saw it was getting dark, but…" She looked down at her hands, still embarrassed by the situation with Kurt and now by her own actions and feelings.
"But you needed to escape for a while, and this is your place," he finished for her. "I understand the need to run more than anyone Fraulein. I needed to run to escape the pain of Agathe's death and I ran so far and so long I nearly lost everyone that I cared about. Sometimes, you just can't run away from your problems, can you?"
Maria refused to look at him. The Captain's eyes were burning a hole right through her. His gaze was so intense she had to consciously fight the urge to meet his emotional eyes.
"You know, something funny happened when I was talking to Kurt," the Captain continued. "Out of the mouths of babes they say right, except, well, Kurt is clearly NOT a babe anymore. He asked me if I had ever had sex, can you imagine?"
"Captain, I really don't think this is an appropriate conversation for us to have," Maria protested. "In fact, I'm not sure we should even be in the car alone considering you are going to likely marry the Baroness…"
"There isn't going to be any Baroness," the Captain replied. "My son opened my eyes; you see with that question of his. I realized then that if I were to marry Elsa and be intimate with her the way and husband should be with his wife, I would only be having sex. I would never be "making love" and there's a difference Maria. I had to teach Kurt that tonight and it appears I taught myself something as well."
Maria blushed, "Well, I suppose then it wouldn't be right to marry her." She finally met the Captain's eyes.
"No," he replied, his voice growing softer and huskier as he felt the biological side of the sex act begin to stir inside of him. "I've had sexual partners, Maria, but I've only ever made love to one person, to Agathe, and as I was talking with Kurt tonight, I realized the only other woman I could ever see myself making love with again…is you."
Maria tried to look away, but the Captain gently grasped her chin and held her head still. "Don't shy away," he whispered. "You want to make love with me, don't you, Maria? That's why you were so upset at Kurt. You have the same curiosities about what happens between a man and a woman. Not the biology, I know you know that. The love making…you were curious, weren't you?"
Maria nodded her head only once, "But I can't. I've pledged my life to God, I've pledged my life to his service."
"You haven't taken your vows yet," the Captain replied. "Perhaps, God has a different plan for you. Perhaps there's another vow you are supposed to take. Perhaps love, honor, and obey are what he intended for you instead of poverty and chastity."
Maria didn't deny she had thought about not taking her vows when she returned to the abbey in the fall. She thought about getting a job, going to Vienna, starting her life over in a new place. Now, sitting here in the dark with the Captain's eyes on her, his scent filling the air, his touch burning her skin like a firebrand, she knew she would not be doing any of those things. This was her calling, it was plain as day, she was meant to be the mother of those precious children, to be the Captain's wife with all that meant. She licked her lips and whispered leaning forward just a bit, "Perhaps…"
Their breaths mingled as the Captain closed the distance between them. The Captain's lips softly touched Maria's, letting her feel and experience that very special connection he had taught his son about that night. He kept the kiss short and light, he didn't want to frighten her. When it came to battling him over the children, she showed no fear, but when it came to other things, she was shy and a bit nervous. "How did that feel, Maria?"
"It was very nice, Captain," she replied. "I've never…"
"Been kissed before," he finished again. "I know and I don't plan on anyone else kissing you for the rest of our lives. And, Maria, I think we have moved beyond Captain now, have we not? My name is Georg."
"Georg." She tried his name on her lips, she'd never heard a more beautiful sound. She slowly reached her hand up to touch his cheek. It was smooth, not rough or bumpy like she'd imagined. He brought his hand up to cover hers before pulling her in for another short but soulful kiss.
"We better get back to the villa before I lose control," the Captain sighed. "Tonight, if you don't mind, I will have to see Elsa and let her know that while I've appreciated her company it is time for her to go home. Tomorrow, we can go…Do you have anyone I need to go to, Maria, to ask permission to marry you?"
Maria smiled, this was so fast and so new, but it was also so right and so perfect. She felt it deep inside, she knew this was her path. "Why don't we ask…"
"The children?" they chorused, and both lightly laughed. They had agreed on that, the first of many details of a life together. The Captain turned the car and headed back down the mountain. Maria looked up at the Untesberg, she knew as a child this place was special and would lead her to her true home. It wasn't the abbey as she first thought, it was the villa or wherever Georg and the children were. Baroness Von Trapp…Mother…that was it, that was the life she was born to live.