Vaggie started to go to the kitchen but stopped when she remembered that Alastor could be in there and he could follow her to wherever Fat Nuggets had been hidden. She needed someone to go into the kitchen and bring her food to give to Fat Nuggets.
"Oh why must dust exist?" She heard the frazzled voice of Niffty come from the drawing room. "I've scrubbed and sprayed this hotel from top to bottom, and still everywhere I look there's dust. This must be my punishment."
Her hands were practically raw from rubbing all the glass and wood so hard. Her nose was red and swollen from all the dust she had inhaled and sneezed out during her rapid sweeping and dusting. Yet still she cleaned. If she wasn't already dead, you'd swear that she was on verge of working herself to death. Vaggie felt bad about disturbing her and almost didn't do it.
"Niffty." She said approaching her with caution.
"Yes? What is it Vaggie? Are the bathrooms dirty again?"
"No. I was just wondering if you could do me a favor? Could you go into the kitchen and bring me an apple or something?"
"An apple? You want to stop cleaning to bring you an apple? You've got two legs that aren't broken, why don't you go get it yourself?" She snapped, but then recomposed herself. "I'm sorry for being rude but I really don't have time for such things. I want this spic and span for my grandparents. I refuse to allow them to eat or sleep in any place that has dirt or dust or cobwebs. Which reminds me, tell Angel not to make any webbing until everyone leaves."
"Niffty relax, the hotel is perfect. I've never seen it look so clean. There couldn't possibly be a spec of dirt or dust in any room here. Except maybe the attic."
"The attic!" She panicked. "Oh yes! I forgot about the attic! Oh how stupid of me!"
"But Niffty no one is going to go in the attic! Come back! I need you!"
But she was already scurrying away upstairs.
"Wow and I thought I had OCD really bad." Vaggie said to herself. "I should just leave her alone though. I think she might hurt the next person who interrupts her."
Vaggie decided to try to get Husk's assistance next but unfortunately he had left to find a good brand of wine to serve at dinner.
"Maybe Alastor isn't in the kitchen anymore." She thought.
She quietly went back to the kitchen without making a sound and peered over the edge of the door to see if the radio demon was still there. He wasn't. She quickly went inside the kitchen, opened the barrel of apples that stood in the corner, and grabbed a red one. She hurried back upstairs, planning to meet Angel in the next hallway and give the apple to Fat Nuggets in order to calm him down. But just as she had reached the top of the stairway, she stepped on a sort of trigger which resulted in her feet getting lassoed and the rest of her being hoisted upside down.
"Hey! What the-"
The skirt of her dress fell and covered her face, exposing her underwear. She instantly dropped the apple and with one had she held her dress skirt downward to keep her panties safely hidden from perverse eyes. With her other hand, she reached up and tried to untie her feet from the trap.
"Ha-ha! A nice bear trap never fails!" She heard the familiar smug laughter of Alastor and watched him come out of the shadows with that same smug look on his face.
"Get me down from here shitlord!" She demanded angrily.
"Of course." He said plucking the fallen apple from the floor. "After Fat Nuggets has finished assisting me in the kitchen."
"Alastor you can't do this!" Vaggie said. "If you do anything to hurt that pig, Charlie will never forgive you."
"I know." He said turning his back to her.
"So why are you doing this?"
"You'll find out soon enough."
He walked away, leaving her to struggle with all her might against the trap. Meanwhile Angel had finally gotten Fat Nuggets to quiet down and was keeping vigilant watch over his pig. He had tried to call Charlie on his cellphone, to tell her what was going on so she could come back here and stop this madness, but she wasn't answering for some reason.
"What the hell is she doing?!" He complained. "Why won't she pick up?!"
After trying to reach her for the tenth time, he gave up calling and just waited.
"I wonder what's taking Vaggie so long? I told her Nugsy would eat anything." He glanced over to the side. "Hey what's that?"
At the end of the hall there was a line with a hook hanging from the ceiling and attached to the hook was pack of pink, designer, thongs.
"Oh no." He said standing up. "Oh no, I see what this is. I'm not stupid. I know that this is just some ruse to lure me away from Fat Nuggets. Well that's not going to work Smiles, I'm not that stupid."
The line turned to the side where the printed words Silken Succubi could be seen. Silken Succubi was Angel's favorite brand of underwear and lingerie, but they were very expensive, even more so since Angel had quit working for Valentino.
"Aww shit!" He cursed, feeling the temptation gnawing at him like a starved rat. "No. I'm not going to take the bait. I'm not going to fall for it. Besides, as sexy looking as their products are, everyone knows that thongs from the silken succubi are extremely tight and can give you sores."
The line turned again and the words Now Breathable were printed on the other side of the package. Poor Angel couldn't resist any longer. He jumped to grab them, thinking he would jsut try to take them but not follow them if the line was pulled away. Little did he know that this wasn't an attempt to lure him away. It was a trigger for another trap. As soon as Angel grabbed the package, a cage was dropped on him.
"I can't believe I fell for that." Angel said face-palming.
"I can." Alastor chuckled as he made his form visible. "Hence why I set it up."
"Where did you get the big cage?"
"Took it from a shark demon."
"Well you may have caught me but you'll never catch Fat Nuggets. I've hidden him someplace you'll never find him."
"Perhaps, but I don't need to find him." He said producing an apple and a knife from his coat pocket. "He'll just find me."
He cut the apple into two which made it's scent all the more strong. Soon Fat Nuggets got a whiff of the fruit and began to hungrily snort.
"Ah-ha! There you are!" Alastor said picking up where the snorting was coming from.
"No! No! No!" Angel shouted as he desperately shook the bars of his cage. "Alastor please! I'm begging you!"
"Now calm yourself my effeminate fellow." Alastor said, pushing aside the chair and opening up the air vent. Fat Nuggets came right on out and proceeded to much on the two apple halves. "I'm not going to harm your precious pet. I just need him to help me with something very important."
"You expect me to believe that crock of shit?!"
"Well you did fall for my trap, so yes."
He picked up Fat Nuggets.
"Finally." He said. "Now off to the kitchen."
Angel kept shaking and kicking at the bars as though he was a wild animal, driven mad by captivity. And his desperation only grew when Alastor and Fat Nuggets disappeared from his sight.
"Please! Please! Somebody get me out of here! Anyone!" He pleaded.
"Hold on Angel! I'm coming!"
He could hear Vaggie's voice and soon she appeared on the scene with a harpoon in hand.
"Where have you been?!" Angel asked her.
"Alastor set a trap for me and I got caught." She explained. "And it looks like the same thing happened to you."
"He's got Nugsy! Get me out! Quick!"
She used her harpoon to break down one of the bars and the two bolted through the hall and downstairs as fast as they could, heading straight for the kitchen. They could see the shadow of Alastor already raising his knife high up.
"Nooo!" Angel screamed in terror.
But they were too late, the knife came down just as they had set foot in the kitchen. Angel screamed so loud and high that glass could have shattered, and he collapsed on to the floor.
"Oh God Vaggie!" He began to sob. "I can't look! What has he done?! Is Nugsy still alive?! Can he be saved?! Or has he already gutted him?!
"He's...Feeding him pumpkin pie?" Vaggie said confused.
"What?!"
Angel stood up from the floor and was relieved to find that Fat Nuggets was still alive and not one hair had been harmed on his head. What Alastor had done with the knife, was cut a sliver of the pumpkin pie he had made and was now offering it to the pig.
"What do you think little porker?" He asked. "Is it suitable for human consumption? Because I think I may have used too much nutmeg."
Fat Nuggets gleefully devoured the sliver of pie and did a back flip to show his approval of the dessert.
"Splendid. Now on to the beignets."
"What is going on here?" Angel asked.
"I told you two, I needed this pig to help me with something for Thanksgiving dinner, and that was dessert testing."
"Dessert testing?"
"As you all know, I positively loathe sweets and they all taste disgusting to me. I needed to use someone else's tongue to taste test the desserts, and pigs just happen to have a very sensitive taste for sweet things."
"So the whole serving ham for dinner idea that I heard you talking about?"
"A little joke I played with Charlie. She looks so adorable when she thinks I'm going to do something vile and twisted."
"But if you're not serving ham as the main course then what are you serving?"
"Well turkey wasn't the only meat that the pilgrims served you know? They also had venison, and that's what we'll be having. Venison is much better for you than ham anyway."
"Why didn't you tell us all this sooner?" Vaggie demanded.
"I tried, but neither one of you would listen. Also you said a lot mean things to me and that made me mad. So I decided to mess with you." He grinned.
"You're really sick, you know that?"
"You think I'm sick? Just wait til you meet my father, then you'll know where I get it from."
"So you're really not going to kill Nugsy and serve him on bread, smothered with gravy?" Angel asked.
"No. All I want is for him to taste test the desserts." Alastor then placed a pastry topped with honey and powdered sugar in front of Fat Nuggets. "These are my mother's favorites so I can't serve them unless they are perfect. What do you think?"
Fat Nuggets gobbled up that beignet in one gulp and he did another back flip while licking the powdered sugar from his mouth.
"Wonderful! Everything has been cooked to perfection. Now if you all will excuse me, I must go and make myself look presentable for tonight."
But Vaggie was still a little suspicious about the radio demon's actions. All this trouble just to make sure he cooked sweets right and to get back at her? She didn't buy it, there had to be an ulterior motive to this. After all, pigs may have been experts on sweet things but anyone else could have been able to help him with the taste testing just as well.
Not satisfied with the answer she was given, she followed after the radio demon and confronted him.
"Oh dear, now what troubles you?" Alastor asked her. "I really don't have the time to deal with your complaints right now, our guests will be here any minute and I do look quite a sight."
He pointed to his flour and grease stained shirt to add emphasis to his words.
"Did you really put us through all that just to get a taste tester and to puss me off?" She asked.
"Well what other motive could I possibly have?" He asked with a raised eyebrow. "Then again, maybe it was all a ruse to distract our arachnid friend from going out tonight, so he wouldn't ruin the little surprise you have planned for him?"
Vaggie stepped back and became very quiet. She turned around and looked to see if Angel was close enough to hear what they were talking about. He was far too busy examining Fat Nuggets and making sure that he really wasn't hurt.
"He was planning to go out drinking and most likely come back as drunk as a sailor, and we both know he wouldn't want to appear drunk in front of our guests. At least not one guest in particular."
She wanted to be mad at him. She was mad at him most of the time because almost everything he did burned her up. But not this time. This time she couldn't be mad because in the end he had been trying to help her and Charlie. Sure he went about it in a very disturbed way but no one got hurt and he was trying to do the right thing. So for once, she'd cut him some slack and not tell Charlie about the brief mayhem he had caused.
"Alright I'll let this little stunt you pulled slide." She told him.
"What does that mean?"
"It means I won't tell Charlie about this. But this is a one time thing. So next time, watch yourself, and think long and hard about what methods you use to assist someone."
"No promises but I'll keep that advice in mind."
His final word before skipping up the stairway and into his bedroom.
"That reminds me, I better call my mother and give her a heads up on what to expect in this place." Vaggie said.