AN: Okay, I got a little side-tracked writing ASM, and this turned out….

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is J K Rowling's property, not mine.

The Rubber Duck tale

(Narrator narrates with whatever voice you choose, could even be a squeaky chipmunk.)

Welcome readers, let me tell you a tale that will Blow. Your. Mind!…. I think…...umm…I hope…. right...ONWARDS!

It was a beautiful day that set over the burrow. By 1992 the number of resident members of the Weasley family had reduced to just seven. This day was special though. This day would change history of the wizarding world forever as a new yet very powerful tool would enter the fray.

For you see readers, many knew that the current Weasley children were quite intelligent. Bill Weasley is a curse-breaker. Charlie Weasley is an expert in Dragons, which is no feat for the unintelligent. Percival shows all the bookishness, snobbishness and Yes-manery required to be an excellent ministry employee.

Even the twins show a creative brilliance that is seldom seen in the wizarding world. One must wonder where they such intelligence comes from as the parents do not show the necessary signs. At least in public.

You see, Molly Weasley is rather happy being the quintessential housewife and over-bearing caregiving mother-who-smothers. Arthur Weasley sits in his relatively idle workplace in the Department of Misuse of Muggle Artefacts Office.

Once in a while though, he would be given a hidden gem that no self-respecting blood-purist DMLE wizard would ever know what to do with.

Not many, except maybe the mother who smothers, knew that Arthur Weasley was a self-taught rune and spell crafter, who also experimented with any item he found interesting from the confiscated contraband that was handed over to DMMA.

Corrupt and dysfunctional ministerial processes meant that Arthur was able to take many of the items home. Especially since no one cared for the activities of the DMMA.

And so, we find Arthur entering his house after a night of raids on some pesky muggleborns who's experiments had gone wild. "I wonder what made her want a biting kettle." He wondered as he walked up to the entrance of his home.

"Morning Weasleys!" he greeted the whole group happily. He greeted his wife lovingly and sat down for breakfast. "Well, how are we all this morning?" He asked, addressing the whole group, as he looked around at the smiling faces that he received in return, he suddenly spotted something odd. Ginny didn't have red hair and had suddenly become a boy. "And who are you?" he asked.

"Harry sir, Harry Potter." The boy in Ginny's place said. Arthur's eyes widened. "Oh my, Are you really? Well, it nice to meet you Harry, when did you get here?"

It was Molly that answered him, turning away from the pancakes on the stove, "This morning. Your sons took that bloody car of yours to Surrey and brought him back."

"Did you really?" Arthur exclaimed, "Well, how'd it go? Did it fly?"

Molly swatted him on the back of his head. Seeing his wife's glare, Arthur grunted, "I mean, that was very wrong and irresponsible boys, very wrong indeed." Of course, he didn't mean it. Peeping towards his wife over his shoulder, he could see that she thought as much too.

"Now, Harry I needed to ask you, Ron mentioned that you lived with muggles, so I wanted to ask you, what exactly is the function of a rubber duckie."

Harry blinked.

Of course, everyone knows, Harry was unable to answer at the time, since that was when the school letters arrived with Errol.

Arthur later received a rollicking from Molly, over the car and the ease with which the twins had gotten their hands on them.

Now he stood in his shed, having agreed to get rid of everything, except the car. He looked around and had a brain wave. He opened the car's boot and rummaged around for a small switch he had installed a few weeks ago.

Finding the switch, he grinned to himself. This would help immensely. He flipped it and a flap on the side opened to reveal …nothing. Just a square hole on the side of the car. Except, this hole had the properties of a mokeskin pouch. He could store everything he had created in here, and only had to think of the item and it would be returned to him.

He took some time to tabulate all his creation. He then created two copies of the list. One he placed on the inside of the boot door. The other he put in his pocket, after which, he began putting all the items in the boot.

A couple of hours later, all he was left with was a set of 10 rubber ducks. He stepped out of the shed and looked into the garden, only to find Harry and Ron walking back towards the house, entirely brown.

"Harry! Ron!" he called out. Hearing him, they looked over and the two boys diverted their walk towards him.

"What happened to the two of you?" Arthur asked. All he got was a synchronously muttered "Twins"

"Ah…. Anyway, Harry, I do believe you didn't answer my question from before." At Harry's questioning look, Arthur elaborated, "What is the exact function of a rubber duck?"

Harry potter, covered in mud, wet, and rather irritated, didn't expect to be answering a question such as this at this point in time. He looked at Arthur, and replied, "They're meant to be launched at people and may explode once they make contact. They're considered a dangerous weapon by the muggles. If they squeak, they must be defective."

The gears in Arthur's head began turning. He nodded distractedly at the Boy-who-lived and sent them on their way to get cleaned. He turned and headed back into the shed.

Arthur would not be seen until dinner later that day, when he walked into the house, grinning like an idiot, while muttering that he had done 'it'.

In the parking lot of King's cross station on the first of September 1992, Arthur Weasley heard his wife ask, "Dear, where is the car?"

To which, Molly heard her husband reply, "Oh Crap!"

August 1st 1997 found the oldest Weasley watching on as his oldest married one of the most beautiful women in the world. He felt proud of his son, and of his family.

He looked around at the arrangements that had been made at the Burrow. They were able to get everything that was planned done. He sighed as he saw his shed peep from behind the opening of the tent.

He suddenly remembered something that had left his mind in the last few years, and quickly looked around, searching feverishly for Ron or Harry. He found the latter and rushed to him.

"Harry, I just remembered something, and I needed to tell you. Do you remember the car that you and Ron flew to Hogwarts?"

Seeing Harry nod, he continued. "If you ever return to the forbidden forest and find it, look into the boot. There will be a switch in the left corner, just behind the seat. If you push it, you will find a hole which works like a moke-skin pouch. Think for weapons. There are a couple I managed to make that could help you in your quest."

"What sort of weapons?" Harry asked.

Arthur shook his head, "I actually don't remember, and I lost the list three years ago. Although, I did fix the rubber ducks to function that you described. They were rather defective and made quite a loud squeak. I fixed everything about them, except the squeak."

Harry stared at him blankly for a second, before the memory of what he had described as the function of the rubber duck, came back to him.

"They explode?" He asked to which Arthur nodded. "How big?" "About 20 times the size of the boys' fireworks. All they need is that they impact the target."

"I'll still need to find the car." Arthur smiled. "The car had a self-drive function that I was working on. It was not complete. It might respond to the command I was installing at the time. As you search, point your wand in the air and say 'beep, beep, car'."

Any further thought was interrupted by Shacklebolt's Patronus. Soon after, all hell broke loose.

May 2nd, 1998

There was still no sign of Harry Potter. Daylight was almost upon them, and all the only signs of life they heard was the occasional roar of some creature in the forest. It seemed like it would soon be time to end the legacy of Hogwarts. Voldemort closed his eyes as he waited.

"No sign of him, My Lord," said Avery.

The dark lord opened his eyes and looked at the death-eaters behind him, frowning. All the assembled death-eaters quickly cowered before him.

He heard a rustle in the trees above and looked up, only to be hit by something on his…. nose?

The thing landed with a squeak and fell at his feet in front of him.

before he could say anything further,

BOOM

He was caught in an explosion. His body was torn to shreds as he felt pain similar to what he felt that Halloween night in 1981.

He cursed, as his wraith form rose from the destroyed body. He opened his eyes to look around his death-eaters, who were also in disarray. Some holding their ears as blood flowed from them. Others unconscious, still more in a similar state as his body, dead.

Hissing, he began to fly away, when he felt his wraith form being dragged across in a different direction. He screamed and resisted with all his might, but to no avail, as he felt pulled backwards into some sort of cave, only for the entrance to be closed before his eyes.

Harry Potter looked up from Hermione's moke-skin pouch at the remaining death-eaters, as they floundered around the forest floor in panic and pain.

Smirking, he pulled out four more rubber ducks from his pocket and tossed them in the direction of the death eaters and walked away.

He stumbled a little at the resultant explosions but continued on. "Beep, Beep, car" he said loud, pointing his wand up.

The car arrived just as it hand done earlier, and Harry smiled as he waited for the car to roll to a stop in front of him. He went to the back, opened the boot of the car and deposited Hermione's moke-skin pouch inside the Moke-space within the car's boot.

Closing the boot of the car, Harry walked back to the spot where Voldemort had waited to kill him.

He had to make sure that elder wand was destroyed.

END