"There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice." -Lewis Black
"Dude this is gonna be so epic!" Whispered a green changeling as he shape shifted into a beetle and crawled into the fridge. Climbing around all the containers he spotted the milk carton close to empty, now in the form of a squirrel he pushed it to the edge of the shelf then reverted into his human self opening the door. He heard a quiet mumble and shut the fridge quickly with the milk in hand looking nervously towards the couch.
There fast asleep lay Kid Flash with Jinx sprawled out on top of his chest. Usually Beast Boy would have snapped a photo for black mail, but this time he really didn't want to suffer the wrath of another angry girl; he still had bruises from last time he got a female titan's bad side. Man, he should've guessed that Pantha was not one to be crossed with.
Opening the container he dumped out the rest of the milk and pulled out his secret weapon. Soy Milk . Pouring the whole case of it into the once dairy carton he sneakily placed it back in the fridge. Giddy for tomorrow's tumultuous breakfast he made his escape.
Kilowatt made his way to the kitchen still drowsy from the lack of a good night's rest. Stupid alternative dimension times were screwing up his sleeping pattern, and how the Herald wasn't dead on his feet with all that teleporting was a gift that the electrokinetic was very jealous of. He goes between only two worlds and comes back sleep deprived, while Mr. Jazz-Hands goes between thousands perfectly fine. Whatever his secret was, the lightning-bolted titan was sure to find out. But not right now as he had reached his destination.
It was still dark out and the only light shining into the room was the glow of the computer screens. The cupboards were situated far back in the commons which is where he headed searching for breakfast. As he started to open them up shuffling boxes around he heard a groan.
"Stop being loud, 'em sleepy."
Immediately pausing he turned towards the couch to see a disorientated Jinx sitting up right on top of the tower's resident speedster. Kid Flash still passed out underneath her, he had a silly smile on his face and drool leaking out on one side.
Taking a pretty obvious guess as to what happened Kilowatt embarrassed, grabbed some cereal, utensils, and the carton of milk and made his way out of the room as quickly as he could.
No way was he going to stay there knowing that those two might start sucking faces again. Nope, definitely not here for that.
He managed to find his way to an empty lobby this time checking for any sleeping couples before making his breakfast. Finally pouring the milk in he sat down on the floor by the window and ate. Only to spew the spoon out of his mouth seconds later.
Gagging turned into coughing, as the blue and magenta hero scanned the ingredients of the cereal box, then the milk, noting nothing to be out of the ordinary or expired. His stomach still reeling and throat burning from the acid that had crept up he sniffed the open milk and retched.
'What was that smell?' It was like the scent of tree piss.
Eyes tearing and his body nauseous, Kilowatt made his way to a trash can and disposed of the offensive meal. Too sick to think about trying to eat anything else he staggered back to his room to rest his food poisoned body.
And when Beast Boy woke up excited to see the soy fiasco he had planned he was only meant with disappointment. Turns out the Herald had bought them more milk earlier from the store and also antacids.