A/N:

Reviews. They make me smile. Thanks guys. (:

Chapter Warnings: self harm that could be considered triggering, swearing

Disclaimer: Obviously, I don't own Harry Potter, or anything except the scenario. Ginny's 'poem' is the song Razor by the Foo Fighters, I don't own that either.

Meanwhile, there was a certain redheaded girl that Harry couldn't seem to get out of his mind.

It was the weekend after Ginny and Harry's late night up, and true to his word, Harry had kept it silent. He'd insisted on bringing Ginny along, and Hermione automatically agreed, assuming that it was for purely romantic reasons, although it wasn't. Ron, completely infatuated with Hermione now, questioned why Harry wanted to bring Ginny, but one glare from Hermione was all it took. However, she'd refused to sit with them while they got their butterbeers, opting instead to sit in a booth a few rows away, scribbling away furiously at a poem.

Ginny had taken up writing ever since the nightmare started, but she refused to let anyone read it, even though Harry had asked her. It was something she couldn't share- it was almost therapeutic. The newest poem she was scratching away at that day in Hogsmeade was called Razor. She had to admit it disturbed her a little that she even wrote this way, but she couldn't help it- it was sick, morbid, fascinating addiction.

Razor

wake up, it's time

we need to find a better place to hide

make up your mind

I need to know tonight

Sweet and divine

Razor of mine

Sweet and divine

Razor blade shine

Patience my dear

We could spend a lifetime waiting here

Maybe this time

I hope I get the chance to say goodbye

Sweet and divine

Razor of mine

Sweet and divine

Razorblade shine

Day after day

Cutting away

Day after day

But anyway

Wake up, it's time

We need to find a better place to hide

Make up your mind

I need to know tonight

Sweet and divine

Razor of mine

Ginny Weasley

In the stall a few rows away, Ron and Harry were facing each other, and Harry was already starting to sweat. He knew Ron had a temper on him and was happy that Hermione already knew what Harry was going to ask, and was prepared to control Ron if need be.

"Ron…" Ron looked up at Harry, puzzled by his scared tone.

"Yeah?" Harry gulped and spit out the speech he'd rehearsed in his room a handful of times.

"You've hated Ginny's previous boyfriends, right?" Ron nodded, the ignorant redhead unsure where this was going.

"Well, the thing is, Ron, I really like her, and you know I'm a good person and that I'd never hurt her, and I know you're my best mate and if you tell me I can't I won't, but…" Harry stopped, out of breath, but Hermione urged him on with her eyes and, as Harry looked over at the beautiful redheaded girl a few booths down that he was pretty sure he was falling in love with, he spit out the last few words in a bout of courage.

"I'd really like to ask her out, mate, with your permission." Ron looked stunned. He looked at Hermione, and then at Ginny, and then spoke in a small, calm voice.

"Harry, can you accompany me outside for a minute?" Harry looked at Hermione, a scared expression on his face, but got out of the booth and motioned for Ron to follow. Hermione stood, allowing him out of the booth, helpless. She mouthed the words "Good Luck." To Harry as the two boys exited out into the bitterly cold November afternoon. Ron suddenly pressed Harry against a wall, his wand at the dark-haired boy's throat. Harry trembled a little.

"Do you swear to God that you will NEVER break her heart?" Harry gave a small nod, frightened of his best friend. Ron paused a minute before releasing him. "Do you love her?" Harry paused for a minute, and then spoke words that he knew were true the minute they came out of his mouth.

"Yeah, mate, I really think I'm falling in love with her." Ron nodded and released Harry, but turned around to face him again.

"Do you, Harry, swear, on your life, that you will never hurt my little sister?" Harry nodded again.

"I swear it on my life, Ron. I'd rather die than hurt her." Ron smiled and clapped Harry on the back.

"Congrats, mate. Get in there and ask her out." Harry was positively beaming as he quickly hugged his best friend and then dashed inside, past his friends' booth and to Ginny's. Hermione looked at him inquisitively, and started questioning Ron as soon as he came in. Harry thought he heard the words "didn't do a damn thing to him, just threatened to" come from Ron's mouth, but he was to distracted. He slid into the seat across from Ginny so he could look her in the eyes as he asked what he was sure to be the most important question he'd ever asked a person. He barely registered as she gave him a scared look and shoved a piece of parchment into her bag. Her hair, curled that day with a spell Hermione had given her, had never been so beautiful, in Harry's eyes. He stared at her beautiful pink lips as he asked the life-altering question.

"Ginny?" Ginny looked at him, a puzzled look in his eye. What was so serious that he was so flustered about?

"Yes, Harry?"

"Will… will… will you go out with me? I… I'm falling in love with you, I think." Ginny's eyes widened with shock, and then narrowed.

"Did Ron put you up to this? Or 'Mione?" Harry shook his head vehemently 'no'.

"No, Gin… I … you're the sweetest, most beautiful girl I know, and I… I want you to be mine." Ginny's face lit up, and for not the first time that week, got up and hurled herself into Harry's arms, laying her head on his chest and climbing onto his lap. He smiled widely at her, taking that as a yes, and kissed the girl of his dreams, not even able to fathom the fact that she was actually his. Ginny kissed him back for what felt like a lifetime before she broke it, turning around suddenly and looking at Ron.

"Won't Ronald be…" Harry shook his head no. "I already talked to Ron, love. He just threatened to kill me if I ever hurt you which-" Harry dotted his sentence by kissing Ginny on her nose "I never, ever plan on doing." Ginny smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him long and hard. She couldn't believe that this- he- was hers. After all her wishes, her dreams, everything… he was finally hers. She was sure it was a dream, so much so that she pinched herself. Harry laughed and wrapped her small, soft hand in his bigger, calloused one. This was a teenage dream.

December

Three weeks Ginny, Harry, Ron and Hermione were sitting together in the common room, Harry leaning over Ginny and attempting to help her with her DADA homework, while Hermione and Ron sat on the couch, talking in hushed tones and stealing kisses every few minutes. After Harry explained a difficult spell to her for the fourth time, Ginny threw her textbook down on the ground and huffed.

"Forget it, Harry, this is so pointless. I'm never going to pass this class, anyway. Thanks for helping, though." Harry looked in concern at his girlfriend- she'd been especially moody the past few days, and he was worried she'd taken up her old practice again. Harry went over to Hermione and whispered something in her ear, and a minute later, she sprang up off of Ron's lap, her cheeks red from the heat of the fireplace.

"Come on Ronald we need to go… and … come on!" Ron, confused as ever but not willing to upset Hermione, trailed after her like a lost puppy dog. After the door to the Common Room swung shut, Harry turned to face Ginny, worry in his eyes. Ginny looked up from the table she was still seated at and sent a questioning glance his way.

"What's the matter, love?" Harry motioned to the spot next to him on the couch, but Ginny, soaking up any physical contact she could get, opted for his lap instead. He turned her around so she was sitting sideways, with her legs stretched out across the couch.

"Harry wha-." She stopped as he grabbed the sleeve of her robe, and the sleeve of the sweater she wore under it, and rolled them up. He gasped as he saw not only a cut, but a small word carved into Ginny's arm. "hate."

"Ginny…" He trailed off in disbelief. He couldn't lead himself to believe that she'd done this again, when he thought that she wouldn't do it anymore. Ginny, her cheeks red from the warmth of the fire and the embarrassment of Harry finding out what she hadn't wanted him to, rolled her sleeve down again in a hurry and began picking at her cuticles, obviously avoiding Harry's eyes, for when she looked into them, she couldn't lie- they were stronger than the most potent dose of Verutserem. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck lightly.

"Why, Ginny? I thought… I thought you promised to come and get me if this.. you… ever felt like doing this again?" Ginny looked back into his eyes, and to his surprise, she was angry.

"Say it, Harry. Cut. I promised come and get you if I ever felt like CUTTING myself again."

"Ginny, I-." Ginny chuckled in an almost maniacal way.

"You can't even say it, Harry! Harry Potter, who's fought demons and dementors and Lord fucking Voldemort himself can't bring himself to face the fact that his girlfriend CUTS herself." Ginny got up, making to dash out of the room, when Harry caught her arm. She winced as his thumbs and forefingers wrapped around one of her recently scarred wrists and she winced, but succumbed as he pulled her to his chest and wrapped his arms around her, cradling her as he would an infant. He lightly kissed the top of her head, and then looked her in the eyes. She saw the pain in his, and slowly the layers of pain in her eyes began melting; first the anger dripped out of them, then the hostility, then the defense, until all that was left was anguish. She buried herself in Harry's arms, and Harry realized that her entire body was shaking with sobs.

"H-h-harry… please… please don't leave me. I… I really, really… I w-w-want to stop… h-h-honest…" Harry looked at her with disbelief before spinning her around and kissing her hard on the lips.

"Don't you dare ever think that I'm going to leave you, Ginny Weasley. I… I love you." Ginny stared at him in disbelief. She then kissed him hard on the lips. She felt that he meant his words, even as he faltered in speaking them. Ginny looked at him then, a twinkle of doubt in her eyes.

"We're only… you're only fifteen, I'm only f..fourteen, Harry. How can we possibly know what love is?" Harry bit his lip, hoping he could articulate what he was feeling without making a fool of himself. He pulled her small, delicate frame closer to him and kissed her neck as he tried to explain.

"Gin… when you've stared death in the face… I mean, every single damn year I've been in Hogwarts I've faced death in someway or another… when you've come that close, that many times, you can't help but… want to really LIVE life, you know? And… all I know… is that when I'm with you, when we're sitting here with you in my arms this way, I feel… I truly feel alive, Ginny, I feel like there actually might be something to hope for, y'know? So I guess the answer is I DON'T know what love is, but whatever it is, I think we have it."