"A little to the left. Yeah, there," Amy sighed, laying on a massage table. A woman with four arms (ending in four very soft hands with three fingers and two thumbs on each hand) kneaded her back with herbal oils. Rory reclined in a chair beside her, with cucumbers on his eyes.
"Amy, I'm not sure about this," he said. His wife scoffed, waving a hand.
"It'll be great. You'll love it. I'm surprised you've never had a pedicure and massage before. After all, I thought you were gay for the longest time," she giggled.
"But I wasn't," he corrected her, lifting a cucumber to give her a loving look. She smiled and stuck out her tongue.
"Thank goodness for that," she murmured, reaching out to briefly brush the back of his hand. Another four-armed, double-thumbed woman walked in and placed a purple bucket full or aromatic blue foam in front of Rory's feet.
"I might change my mind-," he began, until the woman placed one foot in the bucket. He sighed. "Oh, man. That's great." He relaxed as the woman gently rubbed his feet with a thick plush cloth, adding different soaps.
"See? Isn't being gay nice?" Amy joked.
"Mmmmm. I mean, no. I mean, um," Rory stammered. He stopped and huffed. "You know what? It would almost be worth it."
"Hey," Amy protested sleepily, flicking his elbow. He smiled.
"I can't imagine why the Doctor didn't want to stay here. It's so perfect, but not too perfect. Like, perfect, but not creepy, unnatural perfect, you know?" He commented.
"He probably accidentally got married to some woman here. Or offended someone important, or broke something big," Amy joked, though she silently shivered when she thought back to the look on his face when they had arrived.
"I don't know- what about that thing about the buses?" Rory wondered.
"Who knows. He probably thinks we can't look after ourselves- that we'll get lost and end up in some magma pit, or frozen wasteland."
"No magma pits, madam," the masseuse put in. "No ice, either. Midnight- she is a place of crystal. Crystal mountains, and valleys, and formations. Midnight resort- the only place here. No other buildings. Buses are sightseeing, to see crystals. They are very beautiful. No danger- nothing lives outside resort. X-tonic radiation shines on Midnight- keeps her clean and empty. You and he, haven't been sightseeing?"
"No, we've spent these first two days relaxing. We've had a very stressful- what, week? Month? We're time travelers, and it's hard to keep track of time. It's been a while since we've relaxed like this, though," Amy replied. "Crystal mountains?" The masseuse nodded.
"Midnight is made entirely of crystals. Gems. Famous emerald and diamond canyon, layered like stacked books. Beautiful. And bright yellow Sphene crystals all in spire-mountains. But most famous, sapphire waterfall. Long journey, a few hours, but much worth it."
"But the Doctor said not to go on the shuttles," Rory pointed out.
"Not go?" the masseuse repeated, confused. "Shuttles are very safe. Built by Spyders, genius species from the next solar system. Best in the galaxy, and best in all the galaxies around. Each shuttle is replaced after a year or service, and is inspected between every trip. No saver travel than Midnight's shuttles," she said, clearly proud of the resort's care.
"Have you been?" Amy asked.
"Many times. Midnight- she is a kind place. I went there four days ago last, with my nephew for his birthday."
"My son," Rory's masseuse added, smiling. "He turned six years old. I trust those shuttles with my life, and my sister's, and even my son's life."
Amy thought for a moment, relaxing as her masseuse worked the knots out of her lower back. "I want to go," she said.
"But the Doctor said not to," Rory protested half-heartedly. He knew the Doctor was wise, but he wanted to see the sapphire waterfall as much as Amy. And he loved seeing her happy, loved seeing her face light up in awe and amazement when they saw beautiful or inspiring things.
"Oh, c'mon, Rory. You want to go too. You can bring your sword if you're nervous, and defend me from nonexistent creatures living on the uninhabitable surface of the planet, which we won't even be near because we'll be in one of the safest shuttles in the universe," Amy teased.
"Alright. And yes, I will bring my sword, I think," he decided, having already planned to smuggle it just in case. (To be honest, he actually had it on him most of the time, after the Doctor gave him a perception filter to hide it from sight.)
"The next shuttle is two hours from now. When you get tickets, tell them Maglada and Enade sisters recommended the trip. You will get seats for certain," Amy's masseuse, Maglada, said helpfully.
"Thank you," Amy said warmly.
They were both quiet for a few minutes, enjoying their massages and spa time, until Amy broke the silence.
"So what do you think the Doctor is doing?"
"Excuse me, ma'am. Shuttle inspection," the Doctor said, holding up his psychic paper.
"Oh! I didn't realize that was today. And," she hesitated, squinting through the double glass of her large spectacles and the window of the ticket booth, "I didn't realize Spyders wore humanoid guises for non-secretive assignments, like shuttle inspection."
The Doctor shrugged. "I find mine to be extremely comfortable. And I built mine with a bow tie, which is way cool. I don't have a cool bow tie that fits me and looks so dashing," he said, running a hand through his hair and preening. The woman laughed.
"It certainly is a handsome guise! Although- why did you give it such a funny chin?" she asked innocently.
"Funny chin? It's not funny. It's manly. Manly men have nice chins. Like this one." He rubbed his chin self-consciously anyways. "Is it really that funny?" he couldn't help but ask.
"It is a bit funny. But I've seen stranger ones. What did you say your name was again?"
"I didn't, nobody can pronounce my real name good and proper, so everyone just calls me Smith. Which shuttle is open for inspection? And I'll need the keys, too, for a quick test run."
"Is this a special inspection? Usually inspectors just go on one of the tours, but have free reign to go anywhere in the shuttle, including the cockpit."
"I was just kidding with you. Part of the inspection- making sure you don't go handing out the keys. And you passed!" the Doctor said, covering up for his mistake.
"Oh, hurrah! I've always been the smart one in my family." The woman stamped a paper, and handed it to him. "Next shuttle is in two hours."