Deidara, Tobi, and I were so excited today. Christmas was only two weeks away and we came up with an awesome idea!

"Alright, I'll get Danna, Itachi, and Kisame. You'll get Kakuzu and Hidan. Leaving Tobi to handle Zetsu un." "You got it." "Tobi be back in no time!" We set off to our 'missions' and went to go get our targets into the living room; everyone had to be there to tell them our idea.

I knocked on their door and poked my head in. Hidan was polishing his scythe and Kakuzu was focused on counting his money. This is going to be tough, I better start with Hidan first. "What is it?" I stepped in asking politely, "Could you two come in the living room for a minute." "Why?" "Well, we need everyone in there to help out with something."

Hidan glanced at me mumbling, "So what is this fucking something?" "I can't tell you yet." "Not fucking interested then." "Come on Hidan, it's for Christmas!" His head popped up in a flash, "What did you fucking say?" Shit, I forgot; said the taboo word. "I…I said for Jashinmas!" "That's better!"

He stretched a little and put away his scythe and polish. "Alright, I need a break anyway." I tackled him in a hug and pushed him out the door, "Just go sit in there for a minute until I get back ok." "I'm going, I'm going."

Now for Kakuzu…..oh boy. "Kakuzu?" He didn't look up from his money and grumbled, "I'm busy. Whatever it is, do it without me." I sat next to him with a pout, "But it's not going to be the same without you, I need you." He took a quick glance at me and went back to his money, "Don't try to be cute, it's not going to work."

Why did he have to be counting his money today? "Fine, just don't complain to me later if you're left out of the fun." He actually stopped and stared at me blankly, "What kind of fun are you referring to? It'd better not be an orgy again." I wasn't expecting that response.

"Don't sit there and suggest that was my fault! Everyone agreed and that includes you." Got an idea! I tried not to sound whiny when I murmured quietly, "I just want you to come in the other room with me. I don't ask that much of you."

He muttered, "How gloomy." He organized the money and put it in his briefcase before standing up. "Come on, let's get this over with." It wasn't intentional, but I let out a squeal and attacked him with a hug and kiss. He seemed stunned for a moment but then lowered his eyelids, "I can't believe I fell for that."

He was right, but I'm not one to hurt his pride. "No you didn't Kuzu; you're just being nice to me. Don't worry, after we're through you can go back to your business without any interruptions from me." He grinned a little and just stroked my cheek. I took his hand and led him to our destination.

Let's see: Hidan, Kakuzu, Sasori, Tobi, Zetsu, Kisame….where's Deidara and Itachi? Kisame seemed to read my puzzled expression and pointed towards their room. I headed off and went in; Itachi looked pissed. Deidara turned to face me mumbling angrily, "He's being so damn stubborn! He doesn't want to join us because of something from his past un."

"Let me talk to him. You try to keep the others in that room before they get aggravated and leave." Deidara shrugged and actually left without a word, leaving me alone with Itachi. If I couldn't do this, I'll have to resort to Kisame.

I just sat next to him on his bed, "Save your breath, I'm not celebrating." I know his past was rough but I'm really concerned now and spoke softly, "Why not Itachi?" "Deidara already told you and I'm not repeating myself." "That didn't explain much though. You actually don't like Christmas." "No."

I tried to hold his hand but he withdrew. "What happened?" He remained solemn and didn't answer. "You can tell me, I'm not going to think less or make fun of you." I reached out for his hand again and this time he let me hold it. I wasn't sure if he would tell me, but it's worth a shot.

He spoke in barely a whisper, "Too many depressing memories of the times with my family and…." he trailed off before continuing again, "that one night." His grip tightened on my hand and stared broodingly at nothing. Whatever it was that happened, it must've been terrible for him. I wanted to know and yet didn't.

I rested my other hand on his shoulder, "It might do you some good to let it out Itachi." His breathing turned heavy, "I've never told anyone, not even Kisame." "Would you rather Kisame be here instead of me then." How can anyone hide their emotions so well? "No, it's fine. I'll let him know soon enough, just please don't ever tell anyone."

"I promise." "The cause was...Madara." He spat the name out with pure hatred. I knew he was an Uchiha descendant and heard of a lot of the things he's done, mostly through Zetsu and Kisame. Not someone you'd want to go near from my point of view on hearing his personality. I focused back to Itachi, "I was alone on the training grounds, enjoying the night air after the celebrations were over and he appeared. I never cared for him and he knew I didn't. So, he said he was going to give me a present for Christmas."

"I was skeptical to say the least and let him approach cautiously. I never let my guard down for an instant as he held out an envelope. I barely touched it and was instantly drugged. The bastard rigged a narcotic on the paper and made it even more proficient with a jutsu, so it wouldn't have to be injected. It was concealed well; I didn't sense it at all. I was such a fool. Regrettably, that wasn't his so called gift."

I kept quiet and listened intently to every word he said as he continued. "I can still see that smug face and lust filled eyes as they leered at my helplessness. After that, I despised the holiday and never let anyone near me again." "He raped you?" Itachi just looked away and I had to embrace him. "I'm so sorry that happened to you, but don't dwell on it anymore. You got Kisame and he won't let anyone hurt you again. Besides, you have a new family now."

He actually looked a little surprised when I said that, "Family?" "It's a weird combination of people, but we're a family." He actually smirked, "Interesting choice of family members indeed." At least he smiled, "Come on and join us now. Have some fun with your new family and get into the Christmas spirit. But if Hidan's around, make sure you say Jashinmas."

Itachi choked back a laugh and let me lead him into the living room. Deidara was having a time to keep Kakuzu and Hidan from leaving until I came in there with Itachi. "It about time un!" I smiled, "Everything's ok now, so let's get started. Hidan come back here!" He was trying to sneak out behind me and I grabbed his hand to drag him back in his seat.

"This is fucking taking too long!" I sat on his lap to keep him from leaving, despite his little whines. "Ok, Deidara you can start." "Right, it's almost Christmas time and Tobi, Olivia, and myself came up with a fun way to start it off un." I noticed Itachi was cuddled up with Kisame on the couch and he seemed to be feeling better.

"We going to make up our own song!" Tobi pounced up and down happily. Before anyone could say anything I tried to fill the gap, "We're doing the twelve days of….Jashinmas and just replacing the words with our own. Everyone gets to come up with something that symbolizes them." Kakuzu stared at me with that, 'you called me in here for that?' look; it was a little too quiet in here.

I cleared my throat and tried again, "It'll be fun! You can put something you could want for the holiday in the song, for example: on the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me; two hearty blowjobs." Hidan was really interested now, "We can make it dirty?" "If you want to." "Fuck, I'm in on this and by the way," he pinched my behind a little too hard, "its Jashinmas!"

"Well I'm sorry, that just doesn't slip off my tongue easy." "I'm in." "Me too." Itachi and Kisame agreed; then everyone else seemed to go with it. I grabbed a notebook and pen before sitting between Sasori and Kisame on the couch. "Ok, who wants to start? You can pick any day, but try to make the syllables the same so it'll sound real well when we sing it."

"I'm not singing." I grinned at Kakuzu, "You don't have to, but some us might want to." "Tobi want day 1!" "Go for it Tobi." Tobi sang it out, "And a good boy named Tobi!" There were a few laughs and comments. Kisame said, "That actually goes with the song." Deidara sort of mumbled, "Who would want Tobi for Christmas un?"

"As if you don't know Deidara." They watched Zetsu pull Tobi on his lap and wrap his arms around his waist, "I want a good boy named Tobi for my present." Deidara chimed up, "I pick day 6! Six bombs exploding un." "Why the fuck do you want bombs put in?" "What good is the song going to be if it doesn't symbolize some form of art Hidan? Besides, this signifies it was created by me un."

I grinned and wrote it down, "You definitely know it's his alright, besides it fits too." "Day 5." I leaned over grinning at Kakuzu, "Let's hear it." Kakuzu muttered it with a smirk, "Five hundred bucks." Hidan cracked up, "That's SO fucking Kakuzu!" Kisame was laughing just as bad, "Let him have his money for a present and write it down." That day's taken care of; this is just too perfect.

"Who's next?" "Hmm, sharks a swimming for day seven." "Kisame, I'm surprised you suggested that." He just shrugged grinning, "Why not, it's just for fun." Hidan about fell out of his seat raising his hand, "ME NEXT!" "Calm down Hidan, what you got." He grinned evilly and chuckled, "Nine horny fuckers!" He kept going before we could respond, "It makes fucking sense too. There are literally nine of us and we're all horny fuckers!" Zetsu rolled his eyes but smiled, "He does have a point." I'm beginning to think we're all not going to stop laughing.

Even Sasori, Itachi, and Kakuzu were having a great time and kept smiling. Sasori shook his head, "That's Hidan without a doubt." Sasori took the pen from me and wrote something down. When he handed it back to me I read, "Eleven deadly puppets."

Itachi murmured, "Looks like more artistry was added." Deidara grinned from ear to ear, "It'll just make the song more appreciative to those who listen. Won't it Danna un?" Sasori nodded in agreement and I came up with an idea for one.

After I wrote in down, Deidara took it from me and starting laughing. "Tobi want to see sempai!" Deidara handed to him and as soon as Tobi read it, he too cracked up. They were laughing so hard, that they couldn't read it. "Is it that fucking funny?" Zetsu took the notebook from Tobi to answer Hidan's question.

He smirked and chuckled from my response, "She took day 3." "3 huge cocks." They stared at me like where did that come from. I had to explain, "I did that for a reason, since there are actually three huge cocks in this room." Sasori just had to ask, "So which of these cocks are you referring to." "It's not like we don't already know un." "There's Kakuzu, Kisame, and Zetsu." "Even Tobi knows that, but Tobi has a question Olivee. Which one's the biggest?" I thought about and shook my head, "I have no idea Tobi." "I know how to solve that fucking problem."

Hidan went into the kitchen and came back with a measuring tape, "Just get them hard and we'll fucking measure their cocks. I've wanted to know for a while now too." "You do realize I won't let you do that right?" Kakuzu and Kisame grunted in agreement. Come to think of it, I don't know the length of Kakuzu's. "Hidan." "What?" "We can try it later."

He grinned and sat back down; what is Kakuzu's size? "My turn." I'm so glad he decided to participate. Itachi smirked a little, "Eight cocks a throbbing." Kisame stared down at him, not believing what he just heard and the rest followed suit. I noticed and chimed in, "I get it! There's literally eight cocks here; that's clever Itachi."

"Makes perfect sense to me I guess. I just hope there's only one particular cock you have in mind for Christmas," Kisame purred into his lovers ear. Itachi blushed slightly and cuddled closer to him. Such a sweet moment, but it was soon interrupted. "What about four gutless bodies?" "NO! Zetsu, that doesn't go in a song un!" "It's my turn and I rather a reference to food !"

I agreed with Deidara, that was just creepy. Hidan made it worse, "What about headless bodies then?" "Hidan! That's almost as bad and it's a combination of you and Zetsu." Kakuzu left his seat and took the notebook from me, writing something down and handed it to Zetsu, "See if this is agreeable Zetsu." Zetsu took and read it; a grin spread across his face, "I like it. Thanks a lot." "Four body parts do sound nice."

Well, at least that's better than something gutless. I'm content, "Everyone's already had a turn now?" Tobi looked around counting, "Yes Olivee!" Deidara observed what we had down so far, "Only days 2, 10, and 12 to go un." Hidan jumped up, "I fucking got it! Two bouncing tits!"

Don't tell me. Hidan grinned broadly and pointed at me, "The only two bouncing tits here!" I buried my face against Sasori's shoulder shaking my head, "I had a feeling." Deidara wrote it down, "Well it is true and personally I like it un." "Tobi like to have that for Christmas!"

We stared at Tobi in shock, "Never thought I'd hear you say that Tobi." Tobi looked at Zetsu and pouted, "Tobi don't ever get to play with any, but Kakuzu and Hidan can!" We sniggered a little, Tobi's just too cute. "That's because they're obligated to Tobi." "It not fair! Tobi want to do it too." Zetsu patted his head, "Don't worry, I'll make sure you get the opportunity around Christmas." When he said that, he looked directly at me with a fixed stare.

Why am I not surprised; I am the only one whose breasts Zetsu would willingly allow for Tobi to play with. I wonder how he's going to coax me into it? "What about probing fingers for day 12?" "Nah, there's more fingers than that here. Make it horny nympho's un." "We already have horny fuckers; Tobi want tasty candy!" "Fuck no! No one wants just twelve pieces of candy for Jashinmas! It's going to be: twelve bloody rituals." "Homemade porno's would be the wisest choice."

Sasori seemed to get everyone's attention on that one. I had to do it, "I hate to ask this but, do you actually have homemade porno's?" "It wouldn't surprise me none if they included all of us in them." Sasori smirked at Itachi, "Yes they do actually." Deidara sighed, "That's confirms my suspicion now Danna un." Kisame mumbled, "He does have hidden video cameras?"

"Looks like it Kisame." Hidan smirked, "I want to fucking watch them." "Well, so do I!" Kakuzu stared at me and Hidan in disbelief before growling, "Great, now we're being watched." "Lighten up Kakuzu, don't you want to fucking see the kinky shit that goes on here?" "Tobi does!" Zetsu smirked, "I wouldn't mind seeing that for Christmas."

I wrote it down quickly, "It seems everyone agrees on it, so that's day 12." Zetsu suggested, "For day ten, how about ten hearts a pumping." Kakuzu shot that idea down, "You've forgotten I have five hearts, so that won't work." "Ten pairs of handcuffs un!" "What?" "Well, give two for each couple, add one for the trio lovers, and the last one's a spare un."

"Screw up drugs?" "Nah, don't sound right Olivee. Ten times a cumming." "Tobi, I don't think our bodies could handle that many times cumming in one day." Itachi leaned over and wrote down the last day without a word. "Ten mouths a sucking." Kisame stared inquisitively at him, "But Itachi, there's only nine mouths here." "You're forgetting Kisame. Just add one of Deidara's hand mouths as one." Everyone seemed to go with that. "Are we finshed Olivee?" "Uh-huh, let's start the song." "I'm not fucking singing!" "Just talk it out then Hidan!"

"Tobi going to started off!" "Go Tobi!" He cleared his throat, "On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me; a good boy named Tobi!" "It's fucking JASHINMAS, get it straight!" Kakuzu pulled him closer and covered his mouth, "Let them say it their way and you do it your way alright!" Hidan pulled his hand away muttering, "Aw alright!"

Here's the song:

(Tobi) On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me: a good boy named Tobi

(Hidan) On the second of Jashinmas": Two bouncing tits

(Me) On the third": Three huge cocks

(Zetsu) On the fourth": Four body parts

(Kakuzu) On the fifth ": Five hundred bucks

(Deidara) On the sixth ": Six Bombs Exploding

(Kisame) On the seventh ": Seven sharks a swimming

(Itachi) On the eighth ": Eight cocks a throbbing

(Hidan) On the ninth day of Jashinmas ": Nine horny fuckers

(Itachi) On the tenth ": Ten mouths a sucking

(Sasori) On the eleventh ": Eleven deadly puppets

(Sasori) On the twelfth ": Twelve homemade pornos'

All together: On the twelfth day of Christmas / 'Jashinmas' my true love gave to me:

Twelve homemade pornos, eleven deadly puppets,

ten mouths a sucking, nine horny fuckers,

eight cocks a throbbing, seven sharks a swimming,

six bombs exploding, five hundred bucks,

four body parts, three hugs cocks,

two bouncing tits, and a good boy named Tobi!

I hope everyone enjoyed this early Xmas story and liked the song ^-^

Merry Christmas!

I'm contemplating on adding a chapter just for Tobi's wish! Review and let me know if you want me to.^-^