Chapter 2: To Stay Fit, We EXORCIZE!
"I'm on a boat and, I'm going fast and…©"
Daine did a little bit of jazz hands to try and spice up her little number. Allen grinned encouragingly and gave her a thumbs up and the corner of Win's lip quirked upward. Kanda glared, stony-faced. It was Win and Daine's first mission, and the first time the four of them worked together. It also wasn't going very well. The three exorcists Daine was trying to cheer up were all a little green around the gills, so to speak, and in awful moods. Allen being the exception, of course. The rocking back and forth of the boat was doing nothing to improve this, though, and neither, it seemed, was Daine. She hung her head low, clearly giving up.
"I'm sorry, I'm not really making anything better, am I? Do you guys need anything…?"
Win shook her head a little violently, perhaps too violently, because she ended up turning a sickly shade of green and taking flight. Daine watched her run off and facepalmed. Kanda, seeing "the annoying pig woman" flee with a hand clamped over her mouth and the other on her stomach, turned his head to the side and might have snickered. Suddenly, he too was green and running off. Daine sweatdropped.
"Um, Allen, will you be okay here?"
Allen nodded, grinning, though a little pale.
"Sure. I don't have it as bad as those two. I'll be fine. You want me to come with you?"
Daine grinned wryly.
"I'm going to go hold their hair back while they throw up. You can help Kanda."
Allen turned a little more green himself. Daine laughed.
"Just kidding! I'll manage. Hopefully, they'll be sick in turns."
"It's kinda funny that Kanda hasn't killed either of those two yet. Not for lack of trying, in Win's case," Allen mused to himself, chortling and then abruptly reaching for a bag he was keeping handy, just in case. "Ugh," he remarked, frowning. "I really hate boats."
It wasn't hard for Daine to find her fellow exorcists. Both were hanging over the rail, puking their guts out and muttering insults at each other. Without any sort of greeting, she took a gentle hold of their hair-which had been tied back until the splitting migraines they were both suffering had forced them to let it loose-and pulled it back as best she could to keep it out of their respective ways. When they had finished, for the time being, they walked towards the bathrooms, groaning and (continuing) to curse each other. Daine watched them go, laughing.
"Those two will never change."
She decided that they would be fine once they washed out their mouths and wandered back to Allen. He was still sitting on the bench where she had left him, his innocence-possessing hand over his stomach.
"Allen!"
He turned around and smiled.
"Hey Daine. Where's Win? And, um, Kanda? They didn't shove each other off the boat, did they?"
Daine laughed.
"No, they were just really sick. I see you feel a little bit better?"
He made a thoughtful face.
"I do, actually. I don't know what it is, but my stomach's settled down. Maybe I'm getting used to the rocking motion."
Daine made a face.
"I'm really sorry you three are sick, but at the same time, I'm really glad I'm not. After all, who would take care of those two if I was puking my guts up like them?"
Allen laughed, smiling.
"Definitely not me. I do kinda wonder, though…Have you spent much time on boats and ships and whatnot?"
Daine frowned.
"No, not really. Win has more experience there than I do. I really prefer taking the train."
Allen thought for a moment.
"Oh. I thought maybe that was why you weren't sick."
Daine looked at him thoughtfully.
"I usually get sick like everyone else, I mean, I'm not immune to it or anything. It's kind of odd, though, that the only people on board that are sick are you three. And anyway, the rocking motion has been very mild. It's strange."
Allen contemplated this for a moment, brow furrowed.
"I wonder if its an effect of the innocence here, in the ocean. That's what Komui said, right, there have been strange stories about this sea? Maybe we're getting close to it and its responding to our innocence…?"
Daine nodded eagerly.
"Yes! That must be right! And-"
She broke off for a moment, deciding to test her idea and THEN explain it. She pulled Allen's innocence-possessing hand from his stomach and forced him to hold it out away from him. Allen had a strange expression on his face, as though contemplating her sanity.
"Daine, what are you doing?"
She held up a hand to tell him to wait for a moment.
"I'll explain it in a minute, just trust me."
He nodded. A minute passed. Then two. Then three. He moved his free hand to his stomach. Another minute. Daine grinned at the peaky looking exorcist.
"Alright, invoke your innocence."
"Innocence invocation," he muttered, squirming slightly in his seat.
Daine moved his normal hand from his stomach and replaced it with the huge red one. She waited. Allen's expression changed slowly, but she took it as a confirmation of her theory and grinned.
"Allen, I've found the cure to Win and Kanda's problem! And the explanation as to why the seasickness doesn't bother me!"
He looked intrigued and mentally reviewed her experiment. It clicked.
"Ah, so the innocence…"
"…is the cure! Exactly! The reason why I haven't had any sort of problem is because mine is based throughout my entire body, whereas yours is concentrated in your hand. Your's only helps what it can reach. Win's hasn't been helping her because it's on the BACK of her hands, and so her innocence never touches her upset stomach. Kanda…well, Mugen would hardly help him in this situation, would it?"
"You're right! And I feel so much better! Actually, I don't feel sick at all. How odd. Do you think it's stronger when your innocence isn't invoked? The sickness, I mean?"
"Yes! We should go find Kanda and Win! I'm sure they'll appreciate this tidbit of information!"
There was a sudden scream in the background, quickly joined by another, and Allen and Daine looked at one another. Their eyes met briefly and then they were off running. Allen slowed down suddenly when his hand left his stomach, rapidly turning green, but he shook it off when he replaced his anti-akuma weapon.
"So it only works with direct contact?"
"I guess so."
"That sucks!"
When Kanda and Win had fled to the bathrooms to clean up, they made only one devastating mistake. They were arguing on their way there, no surprise as they had been forced to walk in the same direction by their own stubborn natures that demanded that they go to the closest bathroom. Their little spat, at some point right before the restroom doors, reached its climax and they stomped off in opposite directions to the first bathroom they saw. The only mistake that they made was walking on the wrong side.
"Excuse me, miss, you dropped your-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! PERVERT!"
Kanda turned around, staring at the screaming woman. Then-
"Shit."
Win was calmly washing her face, almost bent over the sink. Suddenly, she felt ill again. She bent farther and then puked her guts out with a horrible retching noise. There was a loud, obvious, "Ugh!" in the background. "That's disgusting!"
Win turned to glare and then screamed herself. What the hell was she suddenly doing in the men's restroom? And-UGH, THAT PERVERT HAD BEEN WATCHING HER WASH HER FACE BECAUSE IT GAVE HIM A GOOD VIEW OF HER ASS! Cue blood-curling scream.
"INNOCENCE INVOCATION!"
She was planning on clawing the man's face off when suddenly, a blushing Allen put his normal hand on her arm. She wheeled around, went almost instantly GREEN, and swayed.
"Allen?"
He nodded.
"Um, keep your innocence invoked and make it touch your stomach."
"Okay?"
She did so. He waited for a moment while Win righted herself. Her head felt suddenly clearer. What good fortune! They walked out of the bathroom as Allen began to speak.
"Your innocence is counteracting the sickness we've been getting. Daine and I figured it out while we were waiting for you guys."
Win made a face now that she understood and then smirked.
"Ha, I bet Kanda's going to have a fun time figuring out how to tape Mugen to his-"
Right as they walked out the door, they heard another, scream. More of a yelp, really.
"Kanda! Don't-OH MY GOD."
Win went into "kick-Kanda's-ass" mode.
"KANDA WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU-Oh."
Kanda was glaring at her and Allen, his sword stuck through his stomach. Allen gaped at him, even as Daine covered her eyes and shook her head. Win was merely surprised.
"Damn, that didn't kill you?"
He glared at her and left. A trail of blood followed him. Daine was freaking out.
"ALLEN! WIN! One of you has to go and get that man first aid. I didn't think that he'd-"
She gave them both a helpless look. More specifically, she gave ALLEN a helpless look. His mouth popped open for a moment, and he scratched his head. Daine waited expectantly for his response. He grinned nervously.
"Um, Daine, I would love to lend you a…helping hand with this, but, um, that's exactly the problem. My hands," he started, waving a huge silver one around briefly before clamping it back onto his stomach, "are a bit too unwieldy for such a…delicate job."
Win smirked.
"I'll do it! I mean, sure, I'll have to fight him one-handed, but he can't even draw his sword! I'll tear that bastard up into itsy bitsy little pieces, and we'll see if-"
"NEVER MIND! I'll go…"
Allen grinned happily and turned to give Win a high five as Daine walked off. Win pouted but obliged.
"I was serious. I wanted to kill that jerk."
Allen sweatdropped.
"Why don't we go look for some akuma, yes Win? To take that anger out on?"
Win shot him a breathtakingly exuberant smile.
"Sure!"
Allen nodded and then realized that this was, really, a bad idea. Win fighting one handed without a power boost from Daine? And anyway, what the hell was he going to do, if he had to keep his fighting hand clamped over his stomach? Win skipped off before turning back to face him, a wicked and yet enchanting grin on her face.
"Coming?"
He smiled right back.
"Of course."
While Win and Allen set off to find a few akuma on board to play with, Daine, once again, found herself in a very different situation. Just as Allen had gone into the men's bathroom expecting to find Kanda and bumped into Win instead, so had Daine started walking into the women's room only to literally crash into a very pissed looking Kanda. She had immediately cleared the way for him and explained her and Allen's discovery. She had NOT, however, expected him to stab himself through the stomach with his damn sword!
"Kanda? Are you there?"
She had knocked on his room door a few moments ago hoping to find him but there had been no answer. She had honestly believed he would go to the quiet sanctity of his room after figuring out the cure, but apparently not. She had just turned to leave when the door swung open. Kanda looked even more pissed now than he had coming out of the women's restroom. He glared, clearly not intending to speak. Daine cleared her throat.
"Hi…"
His glare didn't lessen. She decided to just get it all over with.
"Um…When I said that innocence was the key, I didn't mean that you should, well, stab yourself, I mean, we don't think it has to be in your stomach, just so long as it's touching your stomach it should be fine and I came here because, well, I think you need some immediate medical attention."
He stared at her for a minute before shutting the door. Daine growled in frustration and pushed her foot inside the room so that it wouldn't close all the way.
"Kanda, please let me help you!"
He pushed harder on the door. Daine winced.
"OW, um, please? Or if you don't want me to do it I'll go get-OUCH!-Allen or Win. Just-"
The pressure on her foot was gone and she gently pushed the door open. Kanda was sitting on his bed, glaring.
"Don't send the moyashi or the annoying pig woman here. Ever. Or I'll cut you down myself."
Daine sweatdropped.
"Okay then, so how about letting me pull your sword out of you and fixing you up, kinda, so that you actually CAN cut me down?"
He glared, but Daine decided to just go for it. She walked over to him and put both of her hands on the hilt of his sword. He watched her, as though thinking about what horrible death he was planning for her. Slicing? Dicing? Quartering? Or the good old fashion slitting of the throat?
"Um, ready?"
He just glared. Daine took this, also, as a yes and tried to pull out the sword. It wasn't working very well. She cleared her throat awkwardly. He stared. She blushed. He narrowed his eyes. And finally:
"Um, Kanda? Some help, please?"
Allen and Win hadn't had any luck in their stress relief search. Something which the more logical Allen was secretly thankful for. They had, however, decided to celebrate their newly found appetites by eating lots and lots of food. They were, at the moment, enjoying some ice cream together, the Monster Mania Sundae Surprise, to be exact. Hailed as the only ice cream that no man had yet been able to finish in one sitting. When the waiter came by and dropped off someone else's order, Win and Allen grinned at him.
"Two more, please."
Their server gaped. Win fluttered her eyelashes.
"Quickly, yes?"
He nodded and scurried off. Win turned back to Allen, with who she was sharing the little café type table. Piles of dishes sat between them. That ice cream never stood a chance. The two exorcists had definitely worked up an appetite with all of the running around they'd been doing. Trying to find some akuma to completely and totally OWN, of course. They had even discovered parts of the ship they hadn't known existed! Like that one room where all of these fat people jogged on some sort of machine. It was very odd, seeing as no matter at what speed the people went, they never seemed to be going anywhere. They had just been discussing this strange practice when Daine came running up to them.
"Allen! Win!"
They turned to her just as an awed waiter brought them more ice cream. Win smiled.
"Daine!"
She turned to the waiter.
"One more for my friend, please."
Daine shook her head.
"No time! I signed us up for a yoga session. We have to be there, like, now!"
"What the hell is yoga?"
"Some way to exorcize, apparently."
"Let's go!"
To Stay Fit, We Exorcize/End.