A Pirates Life for Me

By Skye-Chan12

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Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter that is a right only claimable to Ms Rowling and Pirates of the Caribbean rights are all Disney's, I'm just a wanna-be writer who has to many ideas to write and draw but never enough time.

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Whoever said sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the pouring rain.

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Jack gazed out across the ocean to the port city before him. Port Royal. The British battlements stretched along the cliff side, leaving the town poorly protected from Spanish or pirate attack. His eyes narrowed as he guesstimated the distance remaining between them and the docks. His eyes stopping briefly on the two Royal Navy ships, one docked in the arbor and the other anchored not far off.

"Jack!" Harry's voice cut through his thoughts. Looking down he saw the boy attempting to shovel water, as fast as he could, out with his magic, but it seemed to be having no effect.

Taking one of the dangling ropes, Jack slid down and landed with a splash into the foot deep water. "Our time is about up, love." Harry started to nod, but stopped in mid-shovel as his gaze was caught by something behind him.

Looking over his shoulder, Jack saw what had disturbed the boy. Three skeletal bodies hung from a passing rock formation along with a sign of warning. According to rumor, they were the remains of Calico Jack and his crew. Taking his hat off he bowed his head in salute to them.

"That's horrible..." Harry murmured, his eyes caught up in the horror of the passing spectacle. Harry could almost make out a chained spirit clinging to the remains.

"They call it justice. Spite, 's more like it." Jack sneered as he tossed a bucket of water out of the boat before throwing down the bucket and giving a calculating glance at the nearing docks. "We're going to make it."

"Of course we're going to make it, if we keep shoveling." Harry exclaimed, picking up the pirates dropped bucket and throwing more water out of the boat.

"Just barely." Jack continued as if he hadn't heard Harry. Grabbing the boy's wrist he pulled the boy over to the mast and waved his arms. "Up, up, this is going to take exact timing, love."

The confused wizard climbed to the perch and was soon joined by Jack. "We need to..." Harry started only to be shushed by a finger on his lips.

"Trust me." He hummed as they sailed, or rather sunk to Harry's horror, past gaping fishermen and sailors. Looking down at the shallows he did another quick calculation before adding, "Though, we may want to be abit higher..."

Grabbing the flag for balance, Jack took a step higher before pulling the still confused Harry up beside him.

Harry watched in amazement as the boat sunk as if on course right next beside the dock where Jack took an elegant step onto the landing. Holding out his hand, Harry took it and stepped off the sunken ship and onto the dock, his eyes staring in amazement into Jack's.

"Shall we go then Master Harrison?" Jack asked, his face splitting into a smirk as he offered his arm to Harry.

"I suppose we shall Captain." Harry smirked back as he took the offered arm and Jack led him down the docks towards town.

"Ex-excuse me!" Both Harry and Jack turned to the white wigged dock master, "It's a shilling to tie up your boat."

Harry bit his lip to hold in his laughter as Jack looked to their sunken ship with furrowed brows. "And I shall need to know your names." the man continued, looking down his nose at his records.

Jack was about to protest when Harry elbowed him, "Just pay the man, he has to make a living."

Jack rolled his eyes, but reached into his pocket and pulled out three shillings and placed them on the mans book. "How about three shillings, and we forget the name."

The man studied Jack for a moment before nodding, "Welcome to Port Royal mister Smith," He then turned his gaze to Harry, "and..."

"Missus Smith." Jack's eyes furrowed in a fierce scowl causing the slave boy to back further behind his lord.

The man's eyes went wide before taking in Harry's appearance once more before nodding in acceptance and walking towards the wreckage.

Harry glared at Jack, "Why did you go and say that?!" he hissed.

"He would have wanted more money." Jack answered innocently as he patted Harry's hand in reassurance. "Women are free, so to speak."

"Jack!" Harry hissed as the pirate pocked the coin purse from the Dock Masters desk.

"A man's got to make a living, love." Jack mimicked with a smirk.

Harry just glared and followed beside the pirate as he weaved through the crowed to the beach.

"Where are we going?" Harry demanded.

"To go shopping." Jack answered with a sly grin as they rounded a corner revealing the Navies dock and its current dock-e. Harry looked up at the ship and shook his head at the captain's antics. 'What have I got myself into.' He thought as Jack sauntered forward, pulling the wizard along beside him.

Looking up and down the docks Jack saw, to his surprise, that there were no guards in sight. The sound of drums and orders being shouted carried over the wind to their ears from the castle like fort that sat up the cliff face.

"Lucky day." Jack murmured happily, ignoring Harry's sarcastic 'ha' as he sauntered down the walk towards the plank leading up to the ship, only to catch sight of two solders dressed in red that had, until that moment, been hidden in their shady resting spot.

"This dock is off limits to civilians." The leaner man recited as they rushed in front of Jack, blocking his path.

"Or not so lucky." Harry muttered sarcastically, earning him a glare.

"Hush now, I'll handle this." Jack muttered pushing the lad behind him. "Not too worry, gents, if I see one, I'll let them know." Jack then tried to walk around them, pulling Harry along behind him, only too blocked once more.

"Wonderful handling skills..." Harry muttered earning him another 'shush' from Jack, which he ignored with a huff.

"It seems that there's some high toned and fancy todo up at the fort. Now why is it, that two upstanding gentlemen such as yourselves, didn't merit an invitation?" Jack stabbed in hopes of touching a sensitive subject- "Someone has to be here to make sure this dock stays off limits to civilians" –to no avail.

"A very fine goal, but it seems to me..." Jack walked forward gesturing to the open waters and the distant ship that lay anchored there, "... That a ship like that makes this one seem a bit superfluous really."

The skinny soldier answered again, though now more relaxed, "The Dauntless is the power in these waters, true enough, but none can match the Intercepter for speed."

Jack quirked an eyebrow at this and put a finger to his chin in mock thought, "I've heard of one, suppose to be very fast, nigh uncatchable..." He paused for effect and looked at both in the eyes as he continued, "The Black Pearl."

This caused Mr. Chub, as Harry now affectionate called the short, squat man, to burst into chuckles, "There's no real ship that can match the Intercepter."

Mr. Gangly, nickname courtesy of Harry's mind's inner workings, turned to his partner with a confused face, "The Black Pearl is a real ship."

"No it's not." Mr. Chub denied.

"Yes it is, I've seen it." Mr Gangly defended

"You haven't seen it!" "Yes I have!"

Jack waited a moment longer as Mr. Chub began to recite Pearl legend, before meandering carefully back to the plank that he had casually lead them away from without them realizing it.

On the deck, Jack placed himself at the wheel and looked out across the ocean with a smile.

"You know they'll be here in a moment with guns waving." Harry hissed.

"I'm just getting a feel of her." Jack reasoned.

"A feel?"

"Trying on the shirt for size to help decide whether to purchase, if we are to keep our earlier euphemism." Jack answered as he watched the two blunders race up the plank at them.

"Get away from there!" Mr. Chub shouted as he carefully climbed the steps as quickly as he dared, "You don't have permission to be aboard there, mate."

"I'm sorry, it's just it's such a pretty boat" Jack explained before correcting himself, "Ship."

"What's your name?" Mr. Gangly demanded edgily, his eyes darting to his partner for reassurance.

"Smithy!" Jack crowed happily out his new name, "And this be the Missus" Jack introduced as he pulled Harry forward in front of him.

This caused both men to immediately lower their weapons and start stuttering apologies to Harry with heads bowed and hats removed.

Harry glared fiercely at the broadly grinning Jack, who quickly hid his smile and daftly avoided Harry's gaze. With one last glare at the heavens Harry smiled kindly at the still stuttering men.

"You have no reason to be ashamed, gentlemen, you were only doing your job." Harry spoke in a soft warm voice as he placed his hands on their arms in an acceptance of their apologies.

"My husband is an a- idiot... He has a drinking problem you see..." Harry explained as she led them to the railing where they followed his lead and too a seat in front of him. "and when he drinks, he tends to gamble." both men gasped, "Yes, I know... I've tried to keep him sober, but every time we are forced to leave our home, to the sea, he always ends up below deck with bottle of rum in one hand and a set of dice in the other!" Harry wept out, his hands covering his face as he let out a few choked sobs.

Both men patted him comforting and sent glares of their own at the amused observing Jack. Taking the offered hanky from Mr. Gangly, he patted the corners of his eyes to keep in the tears. "It was only this morning that I woke up to find that he had gambled away all of our luggage while I was asleep."

Setting off into new sobs, Harry buried his face into the hanky and discreetly modified his clothes under his cloak to look like sailor's rags. "The captain of the ship was very understanding, he managed to find me at least something to wear, but none of the crew would admit to having won our possessions. What's a girl to do, what's a girl to do!" Harry sobbed.

"There, there pet, it'll be all better now." Mr. Chub comforted the 'distraught woman'.

"How can it be better? I have no decent clothes, no money, and all he cares about is getting on a ship and getting drunk and gambling again." Harry turned to glare fiercely at the amused Captain who upon the soldiers gaze turned his gaze to the sky and began muttering and looking around deck, as if a bottle of rum were to be found on the mast.

"Here, darling," Mr. Chub reached into his coat and pulled out a money pouch and placed it in Harry's hand. Jack stood back in awe, Harry was flawless in his performance as he weaved a web of sympathy and need.

"No, I can't take money from such upstanding gentlemen as yourselves!" Harry denied, attempting to give the pouch back, only to be given another by an eager to please Mr. Gangly.

"You can and you will, you've been through a lot for a woman so young and fair as yourself." Mr. Chub's eyes shown with kindness that Harry was sorely tempted to throw the money back and jump off the ship and swim away.

"Think of it as compensation for us waving our weapons in your face before." Mr. Gangly added helpfully with a happy grin.

"You are both such gems!" Harry's eyes shown with fondness as he leaned forward and kissed both of them soundly on their cheeks.

Rising to his feet Harry was pulled back a few feet by Jack who whispered hushedly, "Where are you going?"

"To do a bit of shopping." Harry said with a glare causing Jack to flinch. Clearly Harry was not all that happy with the continued 'woman' ruse, though in his defense it seemed to be working quite well.

"Hey now," Mr. Chub and Mr. Gangly were now on their feet, guns at hand as they observed the conversation, "If you know what's best, you'll let the lady go."

Harry patted Jack's arm reassuringly and gave him a strained smile, "I'll be back soon, I just need to get some more appropriate attire."

"Your going to get a dress?!" Jack hissed in surprise.

"I don't know, do I need to get a dress?" this caused Jack to grin perversely causing Harry to scoff and start to pull away.

"Maybe you should," Harry turned to him with furrowed angry brows, "for appearances sake of course, while we're in town."

Harry rolled his eyes and pulled out of Jacks light grasp and started towards the stairs. A slight whimper from Jack caused him to turn and see both men with guns raised and pointing ready to fire at the near cowering Jack.

Sighting and giving another look to the heavens, Harry glided to the two men and placed a calming hand on both their shoulders, "Gents, I know he's not perfect and he may be more trouble then he's worth, but he's my husband, and I can't imagine life without him." Harry soothed, "I don't wish to become a widow..."

The dramatic pause did it and both men had their weapons lowered and were setting about to calm the 'distressed woman' once more.

Harry gave a shaky smile and a few sniffs for emphases, "So, if you could please... look after him for me? Keep him out of trouble... away from the wine and rum... I won't be long, I promise!"

Both men were quick to accept the 'lady's' request and reassure him that they would keep Jack safe and sound while he went shopping, and shooed him off.

Maybe it was a little unfair to use his legilimency to find out that Mr Chub (Mullroy as it turns out) had an alcoholic father who was a tad abusive and that Mr Gangly's (Murtogg) childhood sweetheart (who Harry apparently resembled) was married off to cancel her father's gambling debts... But if he was going to travel with a pirate, he was going to have to bend his morals sooner or later.

Heading back down the path, Harry spared one last glance at three to see them sitting and seeming to be talking. Smiling Harry hurried up the path stepping out of the way of fishermen carrying their boats to the sea and children rushing across the beach.

Meanwhile Jack was left to be preached at about the evils of alcohol and gambling and of the proper way to dote upon one's wife.

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End Chapter Four