A Pirates Life for Me

By Skye-Chan12

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Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter that is a right only claimable to Ms Rowling and Pirates of the Caribbean rights are all Disney's, I'm just a wanna-be writer who has to many ideas to write and draw but never enough time.

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My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fiber, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.

- Douglas Adams

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Harry was having a doll of a time! His original intentions for his shopping escapade was to get a better notion of how people dressed and acted in this period. His social skills were rusty to begin with and the last thing he needed was to make a 18th century faux pas. He did decide to buy a dress... Though, it turned out to be an excellent choice (flirting with the merchants and shop keepers was a lot easier for one).

Apparently, his accent was labeling him as a person of 'high class', and his lack of a proper 'escort' made them think that he was a young 'Lady' who had sneaked out to go shopping. Over all, it meant great prices and noble treatment. He was definitely getting a good idea of how people expected someone of his 'class' to act. As comfortable as he felt with passing as a woman, he was still nervous about Jack's reaction to his cross dressing.

He had also purchased some male clothing and effects, preferring to keep his wizarding clothes safe and unaltered. He had contemplated being frugal and just using illusion charms, but they took energy to maintain. Energy he might not be able to spare in battle. He continued to deliberate in front of a general goods shop, trying to think of anything else that they might need for their 'mission.' Harry discreetly weighed the wallet and noted that he had spent nearly all of the bequeathed money. He spared one last glance through the shop window before he decided it was time to return to the dock.

Walking up the path, Harry took a moment to pause when he reached the bend in the path and looked over the three figures. They were sitting right where he left them. Walking cautiously onto the docks he was greeted by two smiling navy officers and a certain pirate that was smiling a bit too broadly for his own good. Harry felt the knots in his stomach dispel and grinned shyly back at the captain, not sure if he should be pleased or abashed at the pirate's obvious approval of the fetish.

"What do you think?" Harry asked giving a little twirl for the men in uniform.

"A figure of beauty." Mr. Mullroy complimented with a grin.

"Most certainly." Mr. Murtogg assured happily.

"Well I don't know about that, but thank you all the same." Harry curtsied bashfully.

Jack grinned as was about to say something further when his attention was caught by a teetering figure on the top of the cliff side fort.

Catching his gaze, the officers and Harry looked up as well, just in time to see the figure fall from the battlement and into the water below. There was a furry of feet as they all rushed to the edge of the boat and gazed out in search for the figure. Harry stood frozen for a moment before he sprang into action. Ignoring Jack, who interrogating Murtogg and Mullroy on their swimming capabilities, Harry lept into the water; petticoat, frills, and all.

Harry didn't hesitate to shift from his quickly sinking form into his animagus. Turning slightly when he heard an accompanying splash, he caught sight of Jack's diving form coming towards him. Tilting a flipper for Jack to grab, Harry shot through the water towards the slowly sinking figure. Reaching out, Jack grabbed the woman around her waist and held on tight as Harry pulled them towards the surface.

Gasping for breath, Jack tried to pull the woman up to breath as well, only to loose his grip on Harry and start to sink. Panicking only slightly, Jack deftly ripped seams and pulled the woman out of the richly decorated gown, which sunk to the bottom. Feeling something brush past his hand, Jack managed to catch hold of Harry's fin once more and they were off once more shooting through the water towards the surface.

Chest heaving for air, Jack made out the shallow dock only feet in front of him and with a few strokes he was there. Lifting the woman as best he could to the awaiting navy men, Jack suddenly felt an arm next to his own helping to push the woman up to safety. It was Harry.

"I could have gotten her." Harry muttered, his face dripping and the weight of his sopping dress making him feel several stones heavier.

"And carried her on your back? A dolphin saving the girl after you dived in after her wouldn't look suspicious at all would it?" Jack reasoned before boosting Harry up to be pulled the rest of the way by our friend in red and white.

"She's not breathing!" Mr. Murtogg called out desperately.

Rushing to the girl's side, Harry felt grabbed her arm and felt for a pulse. Finding one, though weak, Harry put a hand on her chest and felt out with his magic for a wound. "Something's crushing her lungs!" He muttered to Jack, whose eyes widened and looked far away for a moment, before he scrambled onto the dock.

"Step aside!" He shouted and Murtogg and Mullroy pulled back slightly, allowing the pirate forward. Kneeling down, Jack pulled out his knife and sliced the corset, ripped it off and threw it aside.

"Never would have thought of that." Mullroy muttered in relief as the young girl coughed out a mouth full of water and gasped for breath.

"Clearly, you've never been married." Jack joked, his eyes locking with Harry's, and found that the boy didn't glare at him for his comment, only gasp for his own breath and look relieved.

Looking back down at the girl, Jack found his gaze caught by a long mettle chain. Eyes widening, he picked up the small coin medallion that was attached to the end. "Where did you get this?" He demanded. The girl looked as though she had been caught sneaking cookies from the cooling rack. Jack was about to interagate further when he found himself nose to steel.

Having missed the sound previously, Jack listened to the sound of boots marching on the dock for a moment before he glanced up at the powdered white wig who was pointing a sword at him. "On your feet." The pompous wig ordered, his voice shaking with rage.

Rising slowly Jack reached out for Harry, and pulled the boy behind him. "What did we do to warrant being threatened, if I may be so bold to ask?" Harry questioned from behind Jack's shoulder, taking in the fancy dress commander with a steely look.

The pompous ass narrowed his eyes at Harry and looked about to comment, only to be distracted by a man in a ridiculously huge wig and clicking high heals who had just managed to push himself through the crowd. "Elizabeth!" He cried out frantically at the sight of the mousy girl beside them.

Seeing that the girl was still on the cold ground, Harry knelt down beside her, "Are you alright enough to stand?" She nodded shakily and Harry grasped her forearms carefully and eased her to her feet slowly.

"Elizabeth!" the Mr. Curly's voice bled with relief as he gathered the girl into his arms.

Noticing the girl wince, Harry thought it best to interrupt, "Her corset was tied too tight... Tight enough to cause her ribs to crush her lungs causing her to black out from lack of air."

"Will she be alright?!" Mr. Curly demanded holding her close as if to ward off the harm that may have been done to her. Harry's mind analyzing the gesture, really hopping that the wigged man was her father, and not her husband...

"She should be fine, probably only some slight bruising, so not too many hugs and it's probably best to avoid wearing another corset for another few months." Harry explained briefly. He's brief training with Madam Pomfrey in first-aid when he was 16 brought the quick and precise diagnoses and treatment from lips before he could think about what it might imply.

"Lower your weapons." Mr. Curly head ordered, and almost everyone did, save for the fancy to-do man who was still looking with narrowed eyes at Jack.

"And who might I ask are we to thank for said rescue?" The man asked with a sneer.

Jack was about to answer, when Harry squeezed his arm in warning. "My name is Harriet, and this is my husband Jack." Harry answered causing the man's gaze to shift from Jack to him.

"My thanks too you both." He said as he held out his right hand for Jack to shake.

Noticing how Jack hesitated, Harry was about to take the mans hand instead, when Jack's internal battle ended and apparently his common sense lost, because he took the man's hand only to be pulled forward in a flash. Harry could only watch as Jack's sleeve was pulled up revealing burned white scar tissue drawn in the shape of a P.

"Had a brush with the East India Trading Company, did we," The man asked mockingly, "Pirate?"

Mr. Curly's face lit with fury, "Hang him." The comment was so flippant that Harry could hardly believe they were talking about a human life.

"Keep your guns on him, men." The man ordered, "Gillette, get some irons!"

"No!" Harry shouted as he tried to do something, anything only to be pulled back.

"Restrain her." The pompous ass ordered flippantly as he tugged the sleeve up further, revealing a faded black tattoo of a bird flying over the ocean. "Well, well, Jack Sparrow isn't it."

"Captain." Jack corrected as he pulled his arm back, "Captain Jack Sparrow."

"Well, I don't see your ship," P. Ass mocked, "Captain."

"It's docked under the harbor." Harry spat, causing the wig to turn his gaze back to him.

"Really..." P. Ass stepped past Jack, but the soldiers kept their guns trained on him. "Well then, Mrs. Sparrow, if you'd be so kind." He demanded as he reached for Harry's covered wrist.

Harry snarled and jerked his wrist away, "You will not touch me."

"Mrs... He won't hurt you." Harry turned to Mullroy, who had pushed himself through the crowd to his defence. He looked to be a bit ruffled, thought that was likely due to the fact that he had just found out he had spent the afternoon with a notorious pirate. "He just wants to make sure you don't have a pirate brand."

Mullroy looked hesatently at P. Ass before turning back to Harry and offered him his hand. Harry's guilt for deceiving the man rose back to his chest as he gazed at the hope in the man's eyes. Slowly, never taking his eyes off of Mullroy, Harry gave his hand over to the sweet soldiers.

Carefully pulling up his soaking sleeve, Mullroy smiled and happily showed his commanding officer the smooth white skin revealed.

Scowling, the Ass turned back to Jack and pulled pirate towards the returning soldier with the cuffs.

The men who had been holding Harry back, then threw him at Murtogg and Mullroy. Both men reached out to prevent his fall, and Harry turned quickly to glare at the retreating soldiers as they followed their ass of a commanding officer.

"You all right then, Mrs?" Murtogg asked as he helped him catch his balance.

"No, I don't think I am." Harry's mind was racing, trying to think of a way to get them free without grievously injuring the surrounding soldiers. He watched with horrified eyes as Jack was chained despite the young Miss Elizabeth's protests.

"It'll be alright..." Mullroy tried to comfort him.

"When Jack is being carried away in chains, you say it's going to be alright?! I don't condone anything that Jack may have done in the past, but he's broken no laws for as long as he's been married to me. He is a good man." Harry felt on the verge of tears as he poured his current emotions of losing the one person who he knew in this strange land, into his false words, "I said it before, and I'll say it again, I have no desire to be a widow."

It was at that moment that Jack pulled the young Miss Swan forward and held her in a chokehold using his shackles. Jack eyes met Harry's as he mouthed 'run'. Harry's eyes went wide his mind screaming 'bloody hell!' as he frantically glanced about the dock for a means of escape. His only option being the sea, Harry dragged his weighted dress a few steps towards the edge and was about to leap in when Murtogg and Mullroy seized him.

At first, Harry thought that they had betrayed him, but was left reeling as they pushed him behind a large cargo container and tucked him from sight by throwing a canvas tarpaulin over him. Then, Both Navy men turned forward and watched the pirate's spectacle and did their best to pretend they had done nothing out of the ordinary. Jack made his daring escape through the air and dashed across the docks, dodging bullets and pedestrians and they were almost happy at the pirate's escape, if only for the fact that his safety meant the beautiful Mrs. Harriet's happiness.

They both traded successful smiles with each other as they watched the pirate disappear over a hill, soldiers scampering after and giving chase. However, both smiles disappeared as the tall imposing figure of the commodore could be seen approaching them with a very determined look on his face. Both steeled themselves and threw out their jaws and prepared for the worst.

"Mister Murtogg, Mister Mullroy." The Commodore nodded in greeting, his stance commanding and his eyes sharply staring down at them, "It seems that Sparrow's slattern was lost track of in the excitement..."

Mullroy bristled at the use of the word, but managed to hold his tongue. Murtogg, however, didn't seem to use his commonsense in the matter and came blurted with good intentions in the Missus defense. "Mrs. Harriet is a good clean woman who just got settled with a bad bit of luck."

"And that bad piece of luck is being the wife of a notorious pirate?" The Commodore mocked the soldier, causing him to be put off his defenses of the woman.

"She didn't do anything wrong." Murtogg defended a bit quieter, avoiding the Commodore's rigid gaze.

"Since you seem to know so much about the woman, maybe you know where she ran." The Commodore commented flippantly.

"We were caught up watching the pirate, weren't we?" Mullroy answered elbowing the man in an offhand manner.

"Right! That was quite a trick he did, wasn't it?" Murtogg admitted truthfully.

The Commodore looked them over quietly looking for any signs of a fib on their faces. "So it would seem." He muttered before turning tail in a bland dismissal.

Both visibly relaxed and were about to turn around to view their defended prize, only to forced back forward. "He's still watching." Harry's voice hissed from behind them, "Don't look!" He hissed again when Murtogg's response was to wave his head around in search of their fearless leader.

Harry waited until the man's silhouette disappeared beyond the hill before he announced to his cohorts; "He's gone." Harry's voice bled with relief as he allowed both men to turn. His heart was still pounding in his chest as he slowly stood, pulling the tarp away as he rose. Both men turned and looked at him with relieved and pleased smiles.

"Told you i'd be alright, didn't I" Mullroy announced with a happy grin. Harry smiled shyly back, twisting his sopping gown around in his hands.

"Someone will be here soon to make sure someone's guarding the dock." Mullroy's voice was shaky and he was still glancing around nervously, as if the Commodore would pop out any moment.

"I don't think I can ever give you enough thanks for all that you've done for me." Harry leaned forward and grasped both men's hands in his own and leaned forward and gave them both a kiss on the cheek, causing both to blush a pretty pink.

"Go find your husband and keep him out of sight and out of trouble." Mullroy dismissed, the tips of his ears turning redder by the moment.

"Thank you." Harry thanked one last time before gathering the dropped and forgotten effects of Jack, and his own shopping packages and raced towards the beach, muttering a drying spell as he ran.

He turned and gave one last wave to the still blushing men before scurrying up the path and into the town.

Murtogg and Mullroy waved back and continued to blush until Harry was long gone.

"Ok... She might have been a wench." Murtogg murmured, his hand reaching up to touch the spot Harry had kissed.

Mullroy only response was a strangled sound.

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End Chapter Five