Chapter 5

Reality Check

Noah sat on the edge of his bed and watched Rachel finish putting on her clothes. He was completely blindsided by her announcement. He thought they were doing pretty good so far.

Rachel was just about to leave when Puck closed the door so she couldn't get out.

"Noah," she chided.

"I don't understand. What did I do?"

"I already told you. I just need some time to think."

"About what? One day we're fine and the next you want to break up? How is that cool?

Rachel hung her head at his hurt tone. "I don't want to get you involved."

"What the hell is going on? I'm serious, Berry. You can't just make that kind of decision without talking to me. This relationship isn't just about you."

"Then why are you planning on seeing Beth with Quinn?"

He blinked a few times at her defiant face. "What are you talking about?"

"Quinn asked Shelby when you and she can come over to see Beth. You said you would never do anything like that without talking to me about it first!"

"Rachel," he huffed. "I have no idea what you're talking about. I do want to see Beth, yes; but I don't want to go with Quinn."

"Then why would she ask that unless you were planning it?"

"Do you trust me?"

"Yes."

His eyes stared into hers, searching for the truth. "No," he declared, "you don't."

Caught off guard by his insight, Rachel stammered through her explanation. "It's complicated."

"I know it seems like that, but there's nothing complicated about trusting someone – you either do or you don't. There is no in between. You trust me with everything but this. Why?"

It was five minutes before he got an answer.

"I'm scared you'll have to choose. And when you do, I'll be left behind."

Puck's hardened expression softened at her timid answer. He gently picked her chin with her finger. "Babe, that ain't ever gonna happen. I don't want to keep Beth; I just want to see her every once in a while. I don't want to be like my own dad – nonexistent. I want her to know she's loved."

"What about Quinn?"

"How many times do I have to tell you before you believe me? She doesn't mean anything to me anymore. I thought she did at one time, but I've grown up since then. I would hope all this snuggling shit and romance crap I've done has shown you that."

"It-it has, I ju-" Rachel blew an exasperated breath. "This is so complicated I don't even know where to begin."

"You can't control this. This has to take its course and I know it drives you crazy not being able to organize everyone the way you want, but I promise it will get easier. You just have to trust me and for the love of everything Jewish, stop listening to Quinn." A soft smile danced across Rachel's lips, putting Noah at ease. "How was your NYADA audition?"

"It wasn't an audition. I just sent in my application."

"Whatever."

"I think it was good. Kurt sent his in too so...maybe we'll both get in. What have you applied to?"

"With my grades? Clown college."

"I'm serious. I'm sure there are some good community colleges around NYADA or at least in New York."

Puck was almost offended at the condescension. "What if I don't want to go college?"

"Well, what do you plan on doing in New York?"

"I don't know. Anything's possible right? It's New York."

Not wanting to fight, Rachel nodded, but wasn't happy with what he was saying. She finished getting dressed and, after a kiss goodbye, headed back over to her house. She walked in the door and saw her dads sitting on the couch watching The Way We Were.

"Daddy?" she called out.

"In here, Rachel!" Hiram replied. Hiram Berry watched his daughter plop down between him and his husband. The moment she sighed, he knew something was wrong. "Sweetheart, is everything alright?"

"Um...yeah?"

LeRoy hit the pause button on the remote and turned to his daughter. "What's the matter pumpkin?"

"I don't know what's going on with me and Noah. We were completely fine until Shelby showed up with Beth and now everything's gone wrong. This is supposed to be the best year of my high school career and she's ruining it!"

"Shelby?"

"No- yes, well no. Her too, I mean. But I'm talking about Quinn. She wants Noah; I just know it. She does everything she can to manipulate things so that she has time with him and every time I say something about it, he tells me to trust him and that nothing is going on. But how can I trust him when he has this...stupid bond with her that I can never compete with? The whole thing's a big mess. I honestly can't take much more of it. I think-" she took a deep breath and swallowed a sob, "I think it's best if Noah and I separate."

"Sounds like Quinn has you exactly where she wants you," Hiram interjected. "From the sound of it, she wants Noah and the only person standing in her way is you. If you give in now, you'll be giving her what she wants."

"That's not the only problem," Rachel admitted. "Beth is also a huge part of it. He wants her in his life, but if that happens, he and Shelby are going to be spending a lot of time together and I just can't handle that right now. Shelby and I aren't exactly on friendly terms and Noah should be supporting me with that instead of thinking about himself."

Hiram met LeRoy's disappointed eyes and nodded. They knew Rachel would never understand what it's like to be kept away from your child – no matter the length of time or age involved – and as painful as it was to do, they had to side with Noah on this one.

"Sweetheart," LeRoy said gently, "I think you and Noah need to take a few days to sort out your feelings. But just because this hurdle is bigger than anything both of you have encountered, doesn't mean it won't end. It just means the fight's going to be longer and harder, but remember angel, the reward of sticking through it is going to be even sweeter." He kissed her forehead and patted her knee. "Take some time apart. You have a lot going on this year: college applications, glee, final preparations, a relationship. It's a lot to handle. But whatever your decision, make sure it's because you have definite proof that it can't work and not because you're allowing other people to dictate what happens."

Rachel smiled at her dad and smiled. "Thank you, daddy." She reached up and kissed them both good night before heading up to bed. Once under the covers, she thought about what her dads were saying and came to the conclusion that they were right. This was no else's relationship and Quinn could just suck it.

xoxoxoxo

A gasp came from the blonde cheerleader as her locker slammed shut seemingly on its own accord. But then she heard a low growl behind her and soon her back was digging into the locker's handle. It was painful, but if she was afraid to make a sound with Puck's eyes boring into her that way. She had only seen him look like that once and that was during Nationals after the elevator incident.

"Hey Q," he said a little too nicely. "Whatcha been up to lately? I mean, besides telling Rachel that you and I belong together and generally scaring the shit out of her in order for her to nearly break up with me."

"W-I-What?"

"Don't act stupid; I know you're a smart girl. Hell, you're one of the most manipulative people I've ever met. Did you think I was jerking around at Nationals when I told you I'd make your life a living hell if you ever made Rachel cry again? Because I meant it. I don't know where you got the idea that we belong together, but you better think twice next time you wanna come at Rachel like that again."

"What is it about her?" Quinn sneered. "You two have nothing in common."

"That's not your problem is it, Q? Why don't you go fuck up another relationship and leave mine the hell alone."

Quinn peered around the steaming figure around her and noticed that the hallway was empty. "I wonder what Rachel would do if she found out that you slept with Shelby?" she sneered.

Puck's eyebrows furrowed together. "What? What are you talking about?"

"That's what I'm going to tell Berry if you don't do exactly what I want."

Without thinking, Puck launched at the blonde and held her against the lockers, squeezing her arms tightly. "Is that a threat, Fabray?"

"It's a promise," she spat. "I want Beth back and I need you to help me."

"What the hell are you going to do with a kid?"

"I'm going to raise her. She's my – our – daughter and she deserves to be with her parents."

"She deserves to be with someone who has the abilities to take care of her," he reasoned. "You can barely take care of yourself and I sure as hell can't."

"I just want to be loved," she cried. "I think Beth can do that."

"Beth isn't a puppy, Q! You can't just take her away from a loving home whenever you feel like it! And whether you realize it or not, you were loved – by Finn, by me, Sam...You were the one who screwed it up. You've manipulated everyone into feeling sorry for you but all I see is a selfish bitch who isn't happy unless she's blaming someone else for her mistakes. There is no future for us. I love Rachel. End of conversation."

And it was. Quinn shuddered as she watched her last line to love walk away. It infuriated her beyond anything she had ever felt before. Rachel Berry of all people getting into Noah Puckerman's heart! It was absurd to even think about. But if he thought that he would make her life a living hell, then he had another thing coming. She spun around and marched on her heels to Sue's office.

"What do you want, Q?" the coach asked from her desk.

"I need your help with something." The older woman glanced up from her notes and stared at the petite blonde. "It's Shelby."

"What about her?"

"She has Beth."

"And?"

"And I want her back."

"What does this have to do with me?"

"If someone were to start an ugly rumor about her sleeping with a student, would that get her fired?"

"Q, let me give you some advice." Quinn leaned in close to hear clearly. "I suggest you stop school and start working at Breadsticks."

"What?" she gasped. "Coach, that's ridiculous. I'm a senior."

"It's no more ridiculous than a teenage girl trying to raise a child while she's in the Cheerios, Glee, and heading for college. You want to give up your youth for a child who in ten years is going to resent the fact that you took her from a stable home because sate your mental instability?" The cheerio was having a hard time finding words, so Sue shut the door and gave her best cheerleader a reality check. "If I ever hear that you talked about this, I will make sure I haunt your dreams. Understand?" Quinn nodded numbly and she began. "Look, Q, I know you've had it rough the past year and a half. I commend you for cheating on all your boyfriends and still managing to be popular for God knows what reason. But look at your friends in Glee: Santana and Rachel get along, Brittany is class president, Porcelain is gayer than a Frenchman in drag and he can safely walk the halls with his boyfriend, and there's an Irish boy who I am convinced is spawned from leprechauns at the end of Kurt's rainbow who landed in Lima. Things have changed – everything but you. You are holding on to an idea that someone can love you if they don't know who you are. But instead of having a child to depend on for that, maybe you should start changing into someone people can grow to love. Take a look at me! I'm a coach of the most successful cheerleading squad in the country and a co-director of the weirdest Glee club slash soap opera that despite all their differences have made through some pretty rough stuff, and a woman whose biography book would be so scandalous that even India would ban it for improper sexual content. Overall, I've achieved a lot. I could have only done that if I changed with the direction my life was going, not fight against it."

"So what do you think I should do?"

"First, you should get the hell out of my office; you're cutting into my lunch break. Second, I've found that apologizing is a pretty good start."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. I was serious about the lunch though. Get out."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Hello there," Rachel beamed. Kurt strutted to her locker and leaned against its partner.

"Hello. I was wondering if you had any time to talk today."

"We're talking now."

"Yeah, but this is the hallway. Things get repeated."

"Okay, when were you thinking?"

"The Coffee Bean after school?"

"Okay." She got her science book and the two walked together to class.

"How is everything going with the Shelby situation?"

"Good," she sighed. "Shelby wants to take it slow and I said I'd think about it. Puck and I are good except..."

"Except?"

"He has no ambition to do anything you know? I mean graduation will be here sooner than we realize and he has no plans to do anything."

"He's not going to New York with you?"

"He says he would, but I don't know if that's what he really wants. He's not a New York guy; he's more...L.A. or Miami. I think he'd hate the city."

"So what are you going to do?"

"I guess I'll have to wait and see what he wants. I know what I'm doing, but I don't want him to feel as out of place there as I do here."

"What if he doesn't want to go to New York?"

Rachel didn't want to think about that. She loved Noah with all her heart, but singing has always come first. Finn understood that. Why couldn't Noah? "He's good enough to be in NYADA with us," she declared. "Maybe I can get him to put in an application."

Kurt's eyebrows rose to his forehead. "Noah in NYADA?"

"Sure. Why not?"

"NYADA has rules. In case you didn't notice, he doesn't exactly obey the ones we have here."

"He will if it means something to me."

"Rach, you can't manipulate him into doing something because it's what you want. That isn't fair to him."

"Well, it isn't fair that he has no goals in life so I guess we're even."

"Let me know how that conversation works out for you."

The second bell rang and the pair took their seats. By time class ended, Rachel noticed that she hadn't stared at Shelby like normal. Maybe she could do this slowly after all. "Miss Corcoran?"

"Yes, Rachel?"

"I just want to say that I would be willing to take everything slow. If the offer is still there."

Shelby's smile reminded Rachel of her own. "Of course it is. Are you going out for the school play?"

"Yes, I am. I think it's obvious that I was born for the role of Maria. I see no competition for the role."

"I admire your confidence, but arrogance is never a sign of a star."

"Excuse me?"

"Rachel, when I went to New York, I was just like you: overconfident, ambitious, ready to take on Broadway and become a legend. But casting directors don't see talent when you are arrogant. They see a spoiled child who is used to getting all the solos and having everyone tell them they're special. I learned that the hard way."

Rachel was deeply offended. "Thank you very much for the unsolicited advice. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have class." She could hear her name being called behind her, but she kept going. She had always heard that she was bossy, arrogant, and annoying; but everyone had always assured her that her talent combated those flaws. Failing at Broadway was just not an option and it pained her to hear that the walls she put up by being confident might cause her to lose her dreams.