Chapter 12: It's The Quiet Of The Storm Approaching That I Fear The Most

When he really thought about it, the past couple of months had been great.

One of the first things he'd done when he'd gone to see Henry was tell JJ and Will about his budding relationship and they were just as pleased and reassuring as Garcia. Ellie Spicer had run away from her abusive foster family and Derek had reconnected her with her mom, something Spencer was immensely proud of. For stability and at his sponsor's recommendation, he'd started making more friends outside of the BAU with a little help from Garcia. The letter to his mom announcing his relationship had caused quite the stir – according to her doctors, she'd been alternatively pleased and overprotective, but was always proud. Derek had even gone with him to the reenactment of the 1930's phantasmagoria and seemed to enjoy it, despite the older man's protests and the fact that he wasn't very into Halloween in general.

Unfortunately, all the good memories didn't keep him from worrying, especially on nights like this. It didn't matter that he'd been the one to suggest that not tell the team right away or even that this was just one of the ways he'd suggested they go about keeping up appearances. He'd assumed it wouldn't bother him – Derek was his, Derek came home to him, and Derek had definitely toned it down for him – but he'd come to realize that he was just never going to get used to watching his boyfriend dance with women at the bars.

It didn't help that he'd always found these outings with the team to be bordering on boring. He didn't drink much, didn't dance, and generally felt entirely out of place. Occasionally, there was someone interesting that he struck up a conversation with and hell, if the other agents got drunk enough, there was sure to be some amusing antics.

'So far, this outing definitely belongs in the "boring me to sleep" category,' he thought.

To make matters worse, he wasn't quite sure why they were doing this anymore. Garcia knew. It had become apparent that Hotch knew – why else had he constantly split them unless there was very little chance of danger? Not to mention the little smile he'd caught slipping onto his boss's face a few times. In fact, Emily had been giving him knowing smiles as well. If Emily knew and Hotch knew, there was no way that Rossi didn't know. And when he logically thought about it, no one on their team would ever bring it up with Strauss unless it was negatively affecting their work. It just wasn't making sense anymore and he'd wondered if it ever had.

Glancing over, he noticed some blonde push the redhead out from between Derek's legs so she could grind her ass into his boyfriend's crotch. They were shooting each other dirty looks, even though he was pretty sure they were actually friends. '...if I left now, would Derek notice? would he stop holding back and be more receptive to flirtations? would he take her home? would he take them home? would he fuck either of them? both?'

He sighed, trying to rein in his fears. He knew these outings were supposed to be fun and stress-relieving, but more often than not, they were having quite the opposite effect. He looked up just in time to see Derek move the new girl's hand away from the front of his pants. Even though Derek was being good and doing the right thing, when Derek caught his eye, he could only manage an almost sickly smile.

He jumped when he felt an unfamiliar hand on his shoulder, but relaxed as a familiar voice asked, "You okay Spencer?" He turned his head and his eyes met Tony's.

"Oh, uh, hey Tony. I'm...bars aren't my thing."

Tony chuckled briefly. "Mmm...no offense honey, but I would have never pegged you as the sports bar type. I've never been stupid enough to invite you to one, have I?"

"True. I'm glad bars aren't your only 'thing' or else I'd never see you," he joked.

"So why are you here? Seems like all you're doing is sippin' on soda and boring holes into that gorgeous straight man up there. What would your boyfriend think?" Tony chided.

He laughed heartily. "I'm sure he wouldn't mind as much as you'd think...and I'm here with my team."

"Oh, is Garcia here?" Tony asked.

"I don't know, Kevin might have taken her home already. Do you want me to check?"

Tony rested his hand on Spencer's forearm before leaning forward in a mock whisper, "You know I'd rather talk to a handsome, intelligent man such as yourself over a woman any day, even if she's one of my best friends and even if that pretty boy is already taken."

It was the wink as Tony pulled back that made the color on his cheeks deepen. "Tony, we talked about you referring to me as a 'pretty boy,' didn't we?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah...only the boy toy is allow to do that," Tony said, rolling his eyes. "So when am I going to meet this delectable hunk of man you've been hiding from me?"

"Eh, maybe tonight...if you convince me that you can control yourself," he grinned.

He'd caught a glimpse of Spencer talking to a guy at the bar and felt relieved.

Spencer got bored easily and a bored Spencer often became a fretful Spencer – any little thing that he could worry about tended to invade his head and usually got blown out of proportion. It was why he wasn't able to get too upset that Spencer always came to the bar when he did, seemingly unable to trust that he wouldn't cheat on him. Despite his history with women, he'd never cheated on anyone so he didn't think it was a valid concern, but he knew Spencer sitting at home alone...imagining would be far worse than seeing the reality and he had hope that watching him behave as he was supposed to would help the younger man trust him more. Besides that, all he really wanted was for Spencer to be able to relax and have a good time; their lives were stressful enough as it was.

But when he glanced over a second time, Spencer looked enamored – flushed but laughing, face animated and engaged, leaning in to the other man's touch – and then that guy leaned in to whisper something. Spencer blushed further, but his mouth and eyebrows were self-assured and teasing, bordering on flirtatious. Derek's throat went dry.

'...do not overreact, do not overreact...look at what you're doing, what Spencer puts up with...Spencer's not doing anything wrong, they're just talking...but he's mine...no, no, do not overreact...you know better, he'll just get pissed off...pull it together damnit...fuuuuuck...'

Despite all the convincing arguments the rational part of his brain was making, when the song ended, he stalked off the dance floor and towards the other end of the bar, slamming back a shot and ignoring the looks he was likely getting from the rest of his teammates. He watched them for a bit and Spencer so absorbed in this...stranger that he didn't even look up from his conversation to find Derek.

Apparently, the jealousy was far greater than he'd assumed because before he'd really noticed, he'd already walked up behind Spencer, stopping close enough to be heard, but still mindful to keep his distance.

"Hey Pretty Boy, you doin' okay? You were looking tired earlier," he asked as Spencer cocked his head in surprise, his eyes wide and cheeks still flushed.

"Oh, I don't know about that one...I'm rather sure this this pretty boy's been looking fiiiine all night long," the stranger smirked.

Spencer glared at the stranger. "Tony, this is Derek, my boyfriend." Then he turned around, grimacing. "Derek, Tony is a friend of mine...Garcia introduced us."

"Mmm...nice to meet you," he said in clipped, sarcastic tone. "Reid, I'm gonna head out. Do you want a ride?"

Now he was pissed. He'd been having a good conversation with Tony about Tony's most recent terrible date that he actually wanted to continue and he could see the "subtle" signs of jealousy rising off Derek like a heat wave. That alone made him want to refuse even more, just to be defiant and show the older man how ridiculous he was being.

'...because how is it that he gets to be jealous of me talking to someone when he spends the entire night grinding his hips against multiple strange women? what the frak gives him any right to act like this?'

"No, I think I'm good. Tony, you can give me a ride home, right?"

"Uh...yeah...sure Spencer," Tony managed under the intimidating glare that Derek usually reserved for unsubs.

"Well. Fine," Derek snapped, his eyes dark and narrow. "I guess I'll just see you at work tomorrow."

"I guess so," he bitterly replied as Derek turned and walked out the door.

He caught Tony staring at him like he had five heads. "Why the frak are you looking at me like that?"

"Spencer, I'm not even going to try to understand how your boy is allowed to hump ladies all night while you aren't allowed to talk to a man at the bar, but the sassy gay friend in me has to ask – what, what, what are you doing?"

"Huh?"

"It's obvious that things aren't right and you and your man need to have a talk, but I would like to continue being your friend and that's not gonna go down so well if your boyfriend's worried I'm...encroaching on his territory."

"I'm not..." he protested.

"...anyone's property, obviously. Don't give me the dumb act...you're smart enough to know what I mean. Admittedly, I didn't help with the 'pretty boy' comment, but I kinda wanted to smack him around for being a jackass and went for the verbal assault instead. But darlin, that is one fiiiine looking man and if he is even a tenth as good of a man as you and Garcia have built him up to be, you're kickin your own balls right now."

He was silent for a moment, processing everything that had happened.

"I know you're right," he sighed. "Just give me a minute to cool off." Tony nodded.

He didn't want to turn around; he could already feel Hotch's death glare in his bones.

"Prentiss, I swear if you don't take Reid to Morgan's right now, I'll let Strauss know you were the one who threw up right outside her office during her lunch break last month," Hotch threatened.

She blanched. "That wasn't even me and you know it," she argued, looking to Dave for support who shrugged. 'Typical Dave,' she thought, slightly annoyed.

"Yeah, well, I feel like you don't want to explain what I actually found you doing that day during lunch...in Dave's office," Hotch smirked.

"Oh. Ooooh, that is a low blow, even for you." She stood up and continued, "You know, I would have done it without you fake threatening me, but thanks for reminding me of how enjoyable that day was," she grinned, winking at Dave and catching a slightly embarrassed look from Hotch before she walked towards Reid.

"Reid!" she called, "Time to go."

"Umm...Tony here was going to..." Reid started.

"Nope. Use that genius brain of yours and imagine what Morgan is going to assume if you show up with this man." She saw his brain making the connections and waited, hand on her hip and a knowing look in her stare. "I'm taking you, Hotch's orders," she stated.

"Yeahhhh, I shouldn't argue with that. Uh, see you around Tony," he muttered, giving the man his trademark wave.

Once they'd made it to her car, she stated, "Obviously I'm taking you to Derek's and you're not going to give me bullshit about it."

He sighed. "Everyone knows, don't they?"

"Yep. Hell, I'm pretty sure Hotch knew before you two did. That man is a ridiculously good profiler."

Reid just stared out the window for a long time and she assumed he was done talking.

"You could have told us how absurd we were being," he said, startling her.

"I dunno...it was kinda fun watching you squirm," she joked. He angrily huffed in response, so she got serious. "We knew what it was like to want to tell everyone on our own terms and we wanted you guys to feel comfortable enough with each other and your relationship before you told us."

"Yeah, but it was still kinda stupid."

"Maybe," she responded, pulling into Derek's driveway, "but don't tell me about it. Go tell him."

He'd watched Emily drive away before starting up to the front door, which was unsurprisingly locked. When he knocked and no one answered, he just assumed the other man was pissed at him. After all, his truck was in the driveway, so he let himself in with the key Derek had given him just after Halloween.

The house was empty, except for Clooney who hadn't been fed. Even though he knew it was far more likely that he'd be randomly kidnapped than Derek, it was hard not to panic until he noticed Derek's motorcycle was gone.

'...maybe he just needed to go for a drive to cool down...he definitely didn't leave to go pick up women at a bar, right? I mean, that would just be...oh shit, oh shit...oh please no...stop, he's just cooling down, really, seriously...ahhhhhh...no, but what if he is?'

He curled up in Derek's bed, pulling all the sheets around him, soaking in the other man's smell in an attempt to comfort himself. Between the worrying and fighting the tears that kept threatening to fall, it was a wonder he even fell asleep that night.

Waking up to an empty house hurt even more than he'd expected and he'd expected it to hurt worse than the time he got infected with anthrax. And then there was the reality that he didn't know if he could make it to work on time if he took public transit. So he sucked up his pride and made a phone call.

"Garcia?" he nearly sobbed.

"Reid, honey, what's wrong? Who do I need to beat up?"

"No one," he choked, "but just...you're not too hung over to give me a ride, right?"

"Yeah, Kevin pulled me out early enough. Did your car break down again?" she asked.

"No, I'm...I'm at Derek's," he stated. When she started asking why and how, he finally broke down and cried. "J-just come g-get me, o-okay?"

A/N -

1) Super long chapter again! There was actually more, but I decided it could wait until the next chapter, heh.

2) I don't know if they made it back in time for the tickets Reid had to the phantasmagoria that he was so excited about at the beginning of episode 6...buuuuuuuut...yeah. I mean, Reid was so excited about it and it had science magic...how could I not include it?

3) Seriously, for episodes 3-6, Morgan and Reid NEVER go out in the field together. In 7, which this chapter is set just after, they go out once and it's a situation in which there is no danger (they do, however, end up having to put their vests on to go from wherever they are to where the team determined the unsubs were hiding).

4) If you haven't seen Sassy Gay Friend, go look it up on youtube (Hamlet is hilarious, Romeo & Juliet and Othello aren't bad, but the later ones are terrible, so I pretend like they don't exist).

5) Writing your friend, who doesn't even watch CM, an essay on why shipping Morgan and Reid has at least some canonical merit and is not just "OMG these two would be hot together"...is really not conducive to finishing a chapter of your actual fanfic. It is, however, fun and satisfying.